Binded
by Lucy Morningstar
Summary: S/K, Post-Canon. Does a modern miko and a demon make good housemates? Kagome resurrects Sesshoumaru's spirit during a exorcism, and now she must live with the repercussions of her decision. Slice-of-life comedy that tapers into the dark. Rated M for later chapters.
1. Arc 1: Miko with A Peculiar Housemate

_Disclaimer: Inuyasha belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and its respective owners._

 **A/N: Hi, Lucy here with a new story! This fic will be different from my usual stories—in fact this one has a more mellow, slice-of-life feel. I hope you guys enjoy this new offering and follow through it. Muahh!**

 **Edit as of 08Sep19: I could not escape my true nature and this fic has grown dark in the later parts. The rating has been changed to MA. There will be tons of foreshadowing sprinkled in the chapters. You've been warned XD**

The ushering of the new year had seen more visitors than usual, locals and foreigners alike, all hoping for that fresh stroke of good luck. As a _miko_ now serving in the Yukino Shrine, Kagome Higurashi was elbows deep in her duties, as she ran around serving the guests in any way possible. She couldn't remember how many times she had demonstrated the purification ritual upon entry, or the amount of good luck talismans she had whipped out.

Thank god she had Amari-chan with her, another fellow _miko_ two years her junior, who assisted with the workload and would bestow each incoming group of visitors with a typical list of dos and don'ts within the shrine.

Dusk had settled, and the shrine was no longer accepting visitors. Amari-chan was seeing off the last of them, and as she was biding them farewell, Kagome joined her from behind.

"Oh my, today was one heck of a field day, wasn't it?" Kagome said, as she rubbed her aching neck. "Have you seen such a _deluge_ of visitors before?

Amari laughed bashfully, cupping her mouth. She was an adorable young woman with a wavy bobcut, and her shy and polite gestures only made her more appealing.

"Yes, I was extremely overwhelmed! Especially the foreigners, they couldn't understand a single word I said."

"But you know Amari-chan, Yukino-jingu is only but a small shrine. You should see the other ones, like Nezu and Meiji. I bet they are still packed at this time."'

"Ah, you must have had a lot of experience being a _miko_ , Kagome-sama. After all you served here longer than me."

"Not really. And I told you to lay off the honorifics, Amari-chan. Just Kagome-chan will do!"

Amari laughed again, and Kagome relaxed, as she faced upwards to the cold, darkening sky. Slowly, they began to close the shrine and started sweeping the snow on entrance grounds. Kagome wiped the perspiration off her forehead. It was still winter, although they had seen lesser snowfall on that part of town in recent years. She was more tired than she wanted to admit.

"As much as it is a blessing, it also comes with a throbbing headache, huh."

They both chortled, of which Amari quickly then hushed her friend. "Don't let the priest hear you, though."

"Speak of the devil, there he is, watching us from behind."

Jyohaku, the head priest of Yukino-jingu, stood quietly at its dark entrance hall, his tall _kammuri_ hat accentuating his already impressive height. And was that a scrutinizing glare thrown towards them? The two women quickly ended their chit-chat, waving their rakes with more gusto.

"Well that's that! I'm calling it a day after this. Maybe a short stop to the nearby Family Mart. Are you coming home with me, Amari-chan?"

Amari glanced over her shoulder, almost forlornly.

"I'll guess I'll wait first for Jyohaku-sama."

"Alright then. I'll see you tomorrow. Ah—and a happy new year to you, Amari-chan!"

"Happy new year, Kagome-sama!"

Kagome sighed as she stopped before her door, her bag of groceries hanging heavily from her forearms. She dug her small satchel bag for her house keys. Soon, the last remnants of her patience completely disappeared, and she heaved her groceries onto the floor, belting out a string of curses as she ransacked her bag.

"I'm home," Kagome muttered morosely, once she was inside her house. She walked straight into the kitchen, passing the living room, where a silver-maned figure sat enrapturedly before the television screen, watching the Japanese dubbed version of High School Musical 3.

Her nose perked up. Having sorted the groceries out, Kagome then strode to the dining area and lifted the dish-cover on the table. There was a steaming rice bowl of _tempura donburi_ waiting for her, alongside with a bowl of _miso_ soup and some salad.

She instantly melted. Nothing beats a steaming bowl of rice after a particular hard day at work!

 _"Itadakimasu!"_ She called out loudly to no one in particular. Then she scarfed down her food, like a ravenous glutton who had been starving for days.

Within minutes, all the food had disappeared into her tummy. Kagome plopped down on the tatami mat, a gratified smile etched on her face, where bits of rice stuck to her chin. She rubbed her full stomach—so full it was aching—and then a thought reached her.

Kagome turned her head towards the living-room. She could only see his straight back. The silver-haired figure was still glued to his spot.

He sure watches a lot of TV, she surmised to herself.

An hour later, the credits began to roll. The film was over, but there was no hint of disappointment on his otherwise placid face. Quietly he stood up and walked into the kitchen, flipping his long hair over his shoulder. Centuries may have passed, but his hair still shone like silk, forever glorious.

For this Sesshoumaru, at least.

Suddenly something caught his attention. He turned and entered the dining area. The table still bore Kagome's empty dishes, bits of rice and food decorating the tabletop generously. Sesshoumaru's jaw tensed.

He remembered the first time when he had his first conscious moment in her house. He had woken up, his head throbbing as the memories of the exorcism overcame him, and how he had agreed to the binding in a moment of desperation. He had never woke up feeling so horrible and conflicted. And the smell. The smell of the house was beyond any putrid, decaying flesh that had defiled his nose. Apparently the _miko_ lived in a rotten pigsty she called a home.

Kagome exited from the shower, smelling of lavender soap. Feeling fresh and light, she pirouetted around her bedroom, then regretted quickly, shivering against the cold. She hummed an old Do As Infinity song as she picked a pair of pajamas from her closet and laid them on the bed. Then she unfurled her towel from her body, and started to powder herself. At that precise moment, her bedroom door yanked open violently.

"The dirty dishes," Sesshoumaru started to say.

" _Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"_

* * *

Kagome sat on her desk, and filched out a book from her drawers. Its covers were of soft pink velvet, the word "Diary" inscribed on it in cursive letters. Perhaps it was too childish to belong to a 25 year-old woman, but Kagome secretly relished its feel, as she sniffed its scented pages. She set down to write.

 _01 Jan 20xx_

 _Happy new year! I guess I should be writing down my new resolutions, huh? Let's see what I've written for last year._

 _1\. Lose weight_

 _2\. Get a bloody boyfriend_

 _3\. Visit Europe_

 _None of these resolutions are being met! I've gained like 5 extra pounds, I'm still single AF, and I still can't make time or money for my Europe trip… T_T_

 _What's the point of writing new resolutions?!_ _On a more serious note, it's been six months since I've had him staying at my house. You-know-who. It's still strange to say or even write down his name. And I'm still unsure how to approach him. I have millions of questions buzzing through my head each time I see him._ _All about the past. About the feudal era I left behind. Most importantly all my old friends..._

... _and that one person._

 _The only reason why I even performed that after-ritual was because I was so curious to know. Jyohaku would blow his top if he knew what I did, he's already pissed as it is, knowing I have a demon binded to me._ _That's right, I still haven't fully explained the details._

 _It's a long story, but I promise to write everything when I have time._

Kagome glanced at the clock. It was close to 11PM.

"You know, for a demon, you watch way too much TV," she said, standing behind him, arms folded. Sesshoumaru didn't flinch. His ears were still ringing from her bloodcurdling scream.

"It is my only connection to the outside world," he stated matter-of-factly. "Until I have gained my strength, this is the only way I can be made aware of what kind of topsy-turvy place this world has transformed into the last few hundred years."

Kagome rubbed her chin. "Well you're right, I guess. Everything is topsy-turvy, if you're comparing it that old era you were from. But seriously, the media is like the worst place for you to learn. Especially this movie. It's total fantasy. You gotta take everything you see with a pinch of salt."

She turned to leave for bed, then remembered something.

"Oh, thanks for the dinner, by the way. I'm seriously impressed. Looks like those cookbooks I gave you really brought forth a budding chef, eh?"

She laughed to herself as she walked away.

Sesshoumaru sighed, as he leaned backwards and stretched his arms behind him. He hoped she didn't think he was doing it for her. He was just bored and was experimenting around the house as usual, and it usually involved doing household chores. And watching an unhealthy dose of Hollywood movies, which, as stupendous as they appeared, intrigued him to no end.

On the screen, Rose floated on a wooden board in the midst of the freezing sea, telling Jack not to let go.

Kagome's eyes opened groggily in the morning. It took her a while to register the face before her, so pale it was almost translucent. And those beautiful dark eyelashes! Long and fluttering, like that giraffe she saw in the zoo when she was a child. And what strange markings on that face…a blue crescent moon and…

She staggered backwards on the futon, cupping her hand over her mouth, trying not to scream. Why was Sesshoumaru sleeping and curled up like a baby beside her?!

It had been too long, way too long. Ten years to be exact, long enough to make her forget who he really was back then. Only that he served as a kind of phantom from her past, one that she sought hard to re-connect.

She glanced to the long tresses of his shimmering hair, cascading down his head. Kagome's hand reached forward and allowed his hair to slip through her fingers.

Soft. And _real_. Sesshoumaru's breath hitched.

"Cold," he murmured in his sleep.

Cold? Kagome wondered. It was not a far-fetched idea to conclude that he was able to physically feel now. And his hair felt as solid as anything. Did Sesshoumaru finally gained a completely material body for himself, thanks to the after-ritual she performed?

Was he no longer a wandering spirit?

The poor thing. He must have laid next to her, unused to the cold, seeking for warmth.

Kagome sat up. It was time to get ready for work anyway. The shrine was going to see another _deluge_ of visitors today. She sighed and rubbed her eyes. Then she pulled her blanket off her and covered Sesshoumaru with it.

 _To be continued…_

[A/N: This is a comedy, I repeat to myself, this is a comedy. I pray to god this fic will not lose its footing and slip down to abysmal darkness..]


	2. Living with the Supernatural

"…what do you think, Kagome-sama?"

Kagome plucked out from her daze and stared at Amari, who was throwing her a questioning smile. She remembered the younger _miko_ had been talking about vacation trips, about places in her bucket list. What exactly was the question posed to her, though?

It felt like she had been sleeping with her eyes open, while assembling prayer beads together with her partner inside the shrine. There had been nothing but a static roar playing at the back of her mind while her fingers moved in auto-pilot.

Kagome ducked her head and clapped her hands together in apology.

"Amari-chan, would you mind repeating yourself? Haaaa I've been really feeling under the weather lately."

Amari giggled. "You know, it's not just today. I've noticed you've been kinda out of it for these past few months."

Kagome's eyes widened as she leaned forward. "What? For the past few months? That's stretching it a little."

"Haven't you looked at the mirror lately? You look like a raccoon." Then Amari changed her tone and quickly added, "But a _cute_ raccoon!"

"There's nothing admirable about looking like a raccoon!" an assertive voice suddenly snapped from behind.

Both women quivered in response at the abrupt appearance of the head priest into the room. Amari looked especially pink in the face, as she peered at Jyohaku looming behind Kagome.

"I'll—I'll go get more beads from the storeroom!" Amari suddenly blurted, running out in a flurry. A couple of beads rolled off the table, bouncing onto the floor. Kagome sighed as she snatched them quickly, before turning to acknowledge the man.

Standing ramrod-straight at more than 6 foot, the head priest of Yukino-jingu easily towered Kagome. His large hands clasped behind his back, accentuating his wide shoulders. As usual the corners of his mouth was downturned, as if everything around him constantly displeased him.

The first time she laid her eyes on him, Kagome admitted feeling intimidated under his appraising gaze and overbearing aura—he was someone whom you knew was in the same room, because the air would suddenly feel constricted. Most priests she'd seen often held a gentle, reassuring demeanour, but not the brusque Jyohaku. Working closely with him as an apprentice for 3 years when she first joined the shrine, Kagome became the only _miko_ -in-training who managed to persevere through his harsh discipline, whilst discovering that his tough appearance was just a front.

The stiff layers of _jōe_ and _kammuri_ hat he'd worn during the new year had disappeared now that the season was over, replaced by softer, well-worn robes. They hinted nothing of his strong, muscular physique—in fact prior to being a priest, Jyohaku actually used to be a professional wrestler. (Kagome had accidentally discovered this gem while coming upon an old bodybuilding magazine in his desk.)

Kagome gave him a respectful bow before returning to her seat. He folded his arms tightly in response.

"Do you know why you're always tired nowadays?" he asked in his usual gruff voice.

Kagome sighed. So he had been eavesdropping on her conversation with Amari. Well, one lengthy lecture coming right up.

"It's just some lack of sleep," she replied casually, stringing the beads together. She patted her shoulder with a fist. "Maybe a trip to an _onsen_ sounds like a good vacation!"

Jyohaku strode forward and slammed a hand on the table. The beads rattled, and Kagome yelped, pushing them away from the edge. She flashed an angry look at him—he really was not as cultured as the other priests.

"It's because of that _ghost_ you decided to bind onto yourself," Jyohaku hissed, his eyes narrowed like stilts. The word "ghost" seemed to taste like bile in his mouth. "I'm still in utter disbelief, to this very day, that you brought that bloody spirit into your home. You're still keeping mum over why you did it. Do you know what happens when you get involved with these other-wordly beings?"

"Amari-chan's taking a super long time, ain't she? Jyohaku-sama, why don't you grab a chair and help me with this while you're at it?"

"Sometimes I don't know _what_ is in that little head of yours," he continued, but he did seated himself anyway, as his fingers started working with the beads in quick, deft movements. "By now you must already be aware of the consequences. These things feed and thrive on your life force, and once they're attached on you, they never let go."

Attached on me? That guy only knows how to watch television, Kagome thought to herself, picking a black glistening bead, glumly. That, plus he does the chores perfectly. Besides Sesshoumaru's not a spirit anymore. Jyohaku's gonna sever my head if he knows that, though.

"But from what I know," Jyohaku said again, as a smug smile consumed his face, "if these spirits are good in one thing, is that they're able to predict lottery numbers. Well, Higurashi. If you're planning to sire one, you might as well make full use of it." He nudged an elbow. "What say you? Just go ahead and ask for a list of random numbers and go down to the lottery store—who knows you're able to strike the first prize!"

Kagome narrowed her eyes.

"Head priest or not, you can be really ridiculous at times," Kagome muttered, and she was met with an incredulous laugh from Jyohaku's side.

* * *

Kagome took the fruit knife and swiped the blade against her index finger in one swift move. A cut appeared, and a drop of blood slowly took form. It trickled into a bowl of murky water that was infused with bone powder, dirt, sandalwood and lime, a dash of frankincense, among other things.

She carried the bowl carefully to the kitchen exit and called out to Sesshoumaru, who was transfixed before the television as usual, watching closely an episode of Ripley's Believe It or Not.

"Sesshoumaru! You've been watching the telly when I woke up this morning, and you're still at it. Don't you feel hungry?"

He ignored her and she harrumped. So the Loch Ness monster is apparently more interesting, eh?

"Sesshoumaru, get your bloody ass here for dinner right _now_!"

He finally glanced over his shoulder, his eyes giving her a steely stare.

She entered a dimly-lit room. At the corner hung a small, strange altar. A pair of candles in glasses lit from each side. Kagome placed the bowl between the candles, before proceeding to burn some jock-sticks. She waved them about, dispelling the first wisps of smoke before placing it in a holder behind a small urn. Her hands clasped in prayer, she then chanted a mantra, her lips whispering intelligible words.

She did this ritual each time she needed to feed him, and she would do so around two times each week. Even though he had a body now, he still was neither human nor spirit, and did not require actual food for his sustenance. Kagome took a step backward, giving Sesshoumaru some space.

" _Bon appétit_ ," she said.

Sesshoumaru touched the bowl with both hands.

".. _Bon appétit_ ," he repeated, enunciating each foreign syllable slowly as they rolled off his tongue.

Kagome nodded with a smile, larger than usual. "Yes, it's like the French version of _itadakimasu_."

"French?"

"Yeah it's another language. Why don't you start drinking now, huh?" Kagome urged, and he could detect that hint of exasperation in her voice.

"I know what it means. I interpret words through their intent, and not from the way they are shaped."

Sesshoumaru tipped the bowl to his mouth. The shadows from the candlelight waved gently on the walls in the semi-dark room. Kagome tapped her foot, then started to pace around, her hands clasped behind her back.

"So Sesshoumaru," she started, "I actually have some questions I've been meaning to ask and…" Kagome swiped her hair behind her ear, feeling nervous for some strange reason. This is it, she thought. This is the part where I dig in him for answers. Something I should have done ages ago. I need to know the truth.

"I want to know what happened to my friends way back in the feudal era. More specifically, to your half-brother Inuyasha…"

Sesshoumaru choked on his offering. When Kagome looked up, she saw a pair of bright, dancing eyes, its colour almost mimicking the candlelight.

"Inuyasha? I haven't that name in a…." His voice trailed off, and he shook his head slowly. "In a supremely long time."

"Well, what do you remember?" Kagome questioned him, more directly this time as she stood closer to him. "The last time you saw him—what was he doing?"

"No," he said curtly.

"No?"

"I am not going to tell you anything."

Kagome staggered backwards. "What? _Why?_ "

"Because I'm unable to remember."

There was something about the casual air in his tone, his indifferent attitude towards the whole subject. It was probably nothing to him, some old, obscure memory at the back of his mind, but it was _everything_ to her. This was the closest she could get in receiving closure about her inconclusive past. To just leave everything behind without ever seeing her comrades ever again, without hearing their voices…

Did they lead happy, meaningful lives? Did they miss her? Did Inuyasha—

Kagome could feel something thick rising in her throat, and when she spoke again, her voice was wavering and the pits of her stomach felt horrible.

"That's enough," she muttered, grabbing the bowl away from Sesshoumaru. He stared at her in silent puzzlement.

"You're angry," he said, as she was leaving the room. "I can sense it."

"Doesn't take a genius to guess that."

Kagome pulled the sliding door until only a few inches were left, just enough for him to see one side of her face.

"You're not to leave this room until you decide to tell me everything. Understand? And no more dinner for you."

The door shut with a loud thud. Perhaps it could be louder if she intended to. Sesshoumaru gazed around the room. It used to be another former pigsty, holding nothing but a bookshelf, old furniture and some dusty boxes—things Kagome had referred to as junk. They belonged to the previous owner of the house, an old _miko_ who no longer lived in this world. The books had been interesting, some collection of poems and classic literary fiction, although he did not bother with the religious texts. He had placed Kagome's cookbooks in the same shelf too, the ones she had given him.

The short curtains floated softly as a chilly draught filtered in. It was no longer snowing in Tokyo but the coldness still seeped in through his feet and into the bones of his spine. Sesshoumaru sat down against the wall, and brought his knees together. He thought about what she said. About needing to tell her "everything."

"I can't tell you," he said to no one in particular. "Everything feels like a frozen block of ice."

Kagome stood before the bathroom mirror. She washed her face, wincing from the cold water then stared at her reflection.

God, she thought to herself. I really need to calm myself down. It's not like it's his fault he doesn't remember. But for how long?

She patted her face dry with a towel, then rubbed her soft cheek, her eyes still etched on the mirror.

"I absolutely do not look like a raccoon."

A few minutes, the door slid open softly. Kagome's head peeked in, her disconsolate face slightly illuminated with an orange hue from the lighting. She saw him crouching at the corner of the room like a poor prisoner.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I didn't mean to be impatient. It's just that I got overly excited. Especially when I saw you again for the first time at that bridge. I think, just maybe, you've been a ghost for a very long time."

"Maybe," Sesshoumaru whispered back, but he didn't look at her.

"I won't ask you again until you're ready. I promise."

"Wait," she heard his voice again. Kagome swiftly opened the door wider, the flames shining in her eyes.

Sesshoumaru came forward. He peered at her from behind the door, his eyes strangely round and pleading, and for a short moment, Kagome was suddenly reminded how he used to be, after all, a _dog_ demon.

"I want my bowl back."

Peeved, Kagome pulled the door and shut it in his face.

 _Wait for the next chapter!_

 **[A/N: Hola, welcome to the end of the 2** **nd** **chapter! Thanks for making your time to read! Just a short commentary on this fic. I live in Southeast Asia where belief in the supernatural is very strong, even in these modern times. Siring spirits for one's gain, whether for wealth or getting extra help in scoring that one chick, although a hushed taboo, is still commonplace. We call it black magic, and although I wouldn't push it so much as to say Kagome's practising it, even though she is on a subtle level, it somewhat sets the background for this story.**

 **Kagome is kinda angsty here. Although she hasn't explained how and why yet—we're aware one of the reasons she has Sesshoumaru with her, is so she can get answers. So he pretty much fails his purpose here, LOL.**

 **Sesshoumaru is decidedly air-headed and mellow at the start of the story. As Kagome mentioned, he's prolly been a ghost for a long time and needs some time adapting, but how did our fearsome, invincible demon lord become a ghost at the first place? I guess you just gotta stick to the story. Huahuahua…**


	3. Pancakes

_Disclaimer: Foolin' lyrics Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., BMG RIGHTS MANAGEMENT US, LLC_

 _Lady Luck never smiles_

 _So lend your love to me, awhile_

 _Do with me what you will_

 _Break the spell take your fill_

- **Foolin',** Def Leppard

 **Pancakes**

A low moan drawled from her. Her chest heaved, expressing a deep sigh like an old woman repressing years of accumulated regret. She rolled over in her futon, her sleeping face meeting his.

Sesshoumaru watched beside her carefully. A tiny stream of drool was trickling from the corner of her mouth and his hand twitched. He was severely tempted to wipe it off.

"Hmmm," another sound emerged again. " _Pan_ … _Pan_ … _keki_..."

Sesshoumaru lifted his head as his elfin ears perked. Pankeki… _Pancakes?_ The young _miko_ , to whom his soul was fused to, whose only blood he sought for his nourishment, and the one he had risked a second chance with in order to live again, wanted pancakes?

" _Thick…fluffy_ … _pankeki_ …"

He trained his left ear close to her lips to make sure he was hearing it right. Suddenly she let out an "Unf!" and her hand violently swatted across his face, and he swore, and this Sesshoumaru rarely swore now, that he felt an electrifying surge of _reiki_ shoot from under her touch.

Kagome woke up slowly, just in time to see Sesshoumaru's white figure on the floor backing away from her, his hand clutching his face. Body lunged away, his constricted eyes fixated at her like a cat whose tail had been stepped upon by its own master… It had been a disturbing sight to wake up to but later on while eating breakfast, Kagome recalled it had been somewhat comical, to think of it.

Her mind still steeped in post-sleep fogginess, she wondered what had overcome him.

"Now what's wrong with you?"

Sesshoumaru didn't answer, his hand still glued to his cheek.

Kagome narrowed her eyes over his strange behaviour in the early morning. Then her face softened as she remembered something.

"You know it's already mid-spring," she said more kindly this time. "Is the cold still getting to you?"

At last there was a subtle shift on his features. He seemed to frown as he gathered himself on his feet and stood up.

"Who said I was cold?"

With a slightly raised eyebrow, Kagome watched as he left for the door. She was all alone in her room now, just as the sun's soft rays were filtering in through the window, warming her thick blanket. Huh. Someone's cranky in the morning, she thought as she tossed in bed, and slowly fell into a dreamless sleep. When she woke up again the sun was almost high up in the sky, but it was her off day, so it didn't really matter. What mattered was that the house was filled with an unmistakable aroma of pancakes.

"Morning," Kagome greeted lazily as she stepped into her kitchen, stretching out any kinks in her back. She bended over the stove open-mouthed, as she watched Sesshoumaru pour a ladleful of batter into the saucepan, the edges of the milky mixture hissing and bubbling into brown crispiness.

"This is weird. I don't remember any pancake recipes in those cookbooks I gave you. And ah! You're wearing the pink Hello Kitty apron I bought for you! Dang, it fits you to a T—it looks even better on you than I imagined."

Sesshoumaru gave her the side eye. She had bought the apron one day and explicitly mentioned it was for him. Of _course_ he would wear it. Why was she filled with so much glee over him wearing a particular article of clothing?

Her extreme mood shifts were beyond his comprehension. One minute she would be yelling her head off at him to "freaking switch off the telly before I really pull the plug on you", and the next minute she would be gushing over how clean the gleaming bathroom sparkled, "just like a five-star hotel." Sesshoumaru had no idea what a five-star hotel was, but she was happy, that bit he could understand.

He watched as she walked along the kitchen counter towards the coffee machine to make herself a cup of—macchiato, he was going to guess, and indeed she pressed the button for it—coffee, and then she turned and pressed her back against the curved edge of the countertop.

"No need for cookbooks," he then told her, as he scraped the edges of the forming pancake with a spatula. "When required, I am able to tap into any branch of knowledge there is from the four corners of the world."

"For real? But the world doesn't have four corners, you know."

He frowned at her. "It does not?"

"But I guess it did occur to me that you've never actually held a spatula in your life. Or…operate a washing machine." Kagome sipped her coffee before she sighed out loud in the most dejected manner possible, before heading towards the kitchen table. "Buuuuut what's the point if you can't even summon your own memories when you need it?"

Sesshoumaru flipped the pancake.

"You require me to remember paltry incidences that hold absolutely no value whatsoever."

Kagome sat down and banged her fists against the table top.

"Paltry?! No value?! Those moments were the best times of my life!"

Sighing again, Kagome cupped her hand into her chin. She began to stare at a blank spot on the robin-egg blue wall over the counter, at the space between her rice cooker and electric kettle. For a while no one spoke, as the air sizzled and wafted with that warm, comforting fragrance.

"But you remembered me, didn't you?" she finally asked. Kagome didn't like the way the question sounded when it left her. She almost couldn't recognize her own voice. As if it had been someone else who was concerned. Someone else who wanted to know if Sesshoumaru had accepted her on a whim, and she had been but a complete stranger to his flashing eyes on that day.

Her eyes drifted to his back, and to the way he worked using only his right arm. Slowly the stack of pancakes on the plate began to rise.

"The tale of the _gaikoku no miko_ ," he spoke at last, as he topped up another layer. Sesshoumaru glanced at her over his shoulder, swiftly catching her eyes in attention, and held her there.

"After your mysterious disappearance following Naraku's defeat, you became quite a figure of myth yourself. The birds were singing and the crickets chirped, along with the wind, spinning tales of a _miko_ from another world sent by the gods to vanquish a great evil."

A bottle of maple syrup appeared from nowhere in his hand and he squeezed it, as the thick liquid oozed over the pancakes. It dripped over the edges of the pancake tower, slowly in sweet, cloying indulgence. He sprayed some cream from a can. He topped two halves of a strawberry. "But the details had been nothing but outlandish. In one version you were supposedly 20 feet tall and stooped like a crane. Yes, I remember you quite a bit."

"Y-you mean I became a legend?!"

" _Myth_. Not many have actually seen you. I did, and I dismissed the tales as hogwash."

"Nooo Sesshoumaru, tell me more!" And Kagome had scrambled over to him now, tugging Sesshoumaru by his apron front. He backed away against the counter, warily reminded of the sharp spike of _reiki_ her touch had rewarded him this morning.

"Tell me, tell meee! Did they say I was from the future? That I crept out from the well like Sadako? That I could shoot magical arrows from my bow with no training whatsoever?"

Sesshoumaru ignored her and looked away from the almost rabid young woman hassling at him for answers.

"No longer about your comrades now, is it?"

"Please tell meeee, Sesshoumaru!"

He managed to worm away from her, grabbing the plate quickly and setting it down on the table.

"Eat first," he said.

Kagome plopped back on her chair, sighing again and again as she grabbed her fork, digging into her thick and fluffy breakfast, just like the way she dreamed of it, except that the dream was now lost on her.

" _Itadakimasu_ …" she muttered, like a child denied of her toys.

Sesshoumaru pulled out a kitchen chair and sat across her. He mimicked her earlier pose, hand propped on his chin, and studied in enrapture as she gobbled through her food.

Yes, if there was something that his heart was certain, and his heart was no longer with him but buried in the middle of that deep, deep forest, it was that nothing pleased him more now than to see her eat, and he could sit for hours if needed to, just watching her, just watching her eat a stack of pancakes.

A corner of his lips pulled, subtle as a feather and it felt like he had finally understood the meaning of his new existence, sitting in Kagome's kitchen, in a Hello Kitty apron…

" _Bon appetit,_ " Sesshoumaru replied, and suddenly those words didn't sound so foreign anymore.

 _To be continued!_

 **[A/N:**

 _Gaikoku no Miko:_ basically means foreign priestess.

 **Haiiii. If I were to strictly follow my story plan, this chapter would be about that backstory about Sess and Kag's eventful meeting, but writing it got me so intense because I couldn't put it in words—that I put it away almost together. Classic case of writer's block. So I skipped that part for a while, without sacrificing the plot, and thus in this piece we find out Sess** ** _does_** **remember who she is, although in fragments, and some light is shed on what Sesshoumaru identifies himself to her. Also, how I wish in hell I could wake up to someone flipping pancakes for me… *cries in silence]**


	4. I Just Wanna Feel the Wind in My Hair

**I Just Wanted to Feel the Wind in My Hair**

"Hey Kagome-sama, do you have someone in your life? Like a boyfriend, maybe?"

Kagome tore the packet of fish food and sprinkled it into the _koi_ pond. Both she and Amari were kneeling at its edge, feeding the _koi and_ checking up on its water quality as part of their shrine duties.

Kagome watched as the horde of fishes swarmed forward and started jostling for the pellets floating on the surface, their gaping thick mouths gobbling as much as they could manage. A pair of golden koi swam at a quieter part of the pond, slowly eating at whatever food that had drifted to them. They were the biggest, and the oldest fish in the lot, and had always been paired up with each other for as long as she remembered.

"Boyfriend?" Kagome spoke, addressing Amari's earlier question. She gave a self-deprecating laugh. "Is there even someone who's interested in me?"

Amari sprinkled more of the fish food. "Ah, there's no need to be humble about it you know."

Kagome sighed. "I have been dating a couple of guys on and off, but it doesn't seem to work out at the end of the day. So I've just decided to remain single and happy for the time being."

 _Yeah right_ , her thoughts prodded her. _Isn't getting a new boyfriend like your constant new-year resolution?_

Amano glanced at her and pouted. "I'm not trying to be a busy-body or anything. I'm just asking because…well…"

Kagome quirked an eyebrow at her. "What, Amari-chan?"

"Well, I have an older brother who's been single for a long time and our parents have really been pushing for him to get married…"

"Geez! And you think I'm a good candidate?"

Amari laughed. "Why not? You're like a good sister to me. Of _course_ , I would want you as my sister-in-law!"

Kagome waved her hands in horror. It wasn't that the idea of being related to Amari that scared her, but having to be match-made with a guy who _had_ to get married ASAP—that was something different entirely. She was _not_ ready to tie the knot anytime soon!

"No, Amari-chan! Please don't think of such things about me! H-how about you? Surely someone cute as you must be attached."

Amari sighed into the pond, looking at the sad reflection of hers on the rippling green water.

"There's someone I like, but he doesn't even glance twice my way."

"Ah, that's sad. Unrequited love is always sad."

"Have you ever been in that horrible situation before, Kagome-sama?"

"Horrible situation?" A gruff voice spoke up. "What horrible situation?"

Amari and Kagome yelped at the sudden male voice that interrupted them. With shuddering breaths they dared to peek over their shoulders, meeting the cold gaze of the head priest. Why? Why was he always catching up on them just when they were taking a quick break…

"J-J-Jyohaku-sama!" Amari-chan eeped, her hands fluttering like a bird each time she bumped into him—or was it the other way round?

The ladies stood up and turned towards him with a perfunctory bow, hiding their broken smiles.

"Well?" Jyohaku pressed, his arms poised behind his back as usual. "I heard there was a horrible situation. If there is something happening within the shrine, then I have the right to know—"

"Not within the shrine," Kagome muttered. "But within our lives."

Jyohaku glared at her then turned to Amari, whose shoulders were shaking in silence.

"Is there something horrible going in your life right now, Kirihata?"

Amari gasped and glanced up at him, struggling to answer. Why would he suddenly be interested to know about her personal life? The head priest _never_ took any concern with her and…

Jyohaku's eyebrows lowered, making his already grim face even darker. "Why is your face all beet-root red? Did you eat something you were not supposed to?"

"H-huh? It's red? Like I'm blushing? Ah—but I'm not really blushing, it must be the heat—"

Beside her Kagome looked elsewhere and sighed, wishing to get away. _One is a bumbling mess, and the other is as thick as a brick._

Her eyes absent-mindedly sauntered to the hedged fence built around Yukino-jingu's premises. She saw a shuffle of white against the green, as though a person was peering in from outside. Kagome squinted further in half-disbelief, hoping she was wrong, that maybe it was her imagination—she didn't want to deal with any funny business at this time of the day—and then she saw his golden eyes poking through the holes in the fence, and her heart _lurched_.

"Holy macaroni with pepperoni!" Kagome immediately turned to Jyohaku and Amari who stood frozen, staring at her. "G-guys, I just remembered, I have an emergency situation at home and I gotta go right now—"

" _Higurashi!_ " Jyohaku bellowed after her but she had scrambled off, dashing out of the shrine as fast as her legs could carry her, around the fence, until she caught up the sight of him. Sesshoumaru. Standing there in public, in broad daylight. He looked as surprised as her, and her eyes flicked to the small urn tucked under his arms.

 _My god, he brought the urn with him!_

"Sesshoumaru!" she hissed. "What the _hell_ is this? Why are you doing here?"

"I…" Sesshoumaru started but she cut into this words before he could explain himself.

"You're not supposed to be outside! What if people see you? And I can't believe you actually brought along that thing with you…"

"It contains the soil of my origins. I cannot be separated from it."

"I know, Sesshoumaru. I know. God!"

He frowned, indignant, refusing to meet her eyes. "The black box is not working. You caused that. There is nothing else of interest in the house."

"That's because the electricity bill went up the roof, thanks to you!"

"I checked the roof. It is fine."

Kagome clicked her tongue in frustration, and pulled on his sleeve. Sesshoumaru immediately jerked away.

"What's wrong with you now? Hurry, I'm sending you home. You're riding pillion on my bicycle. Why did you come here anyway?"

"I was curious to see you fare in your work environment."

"You mean to say you were stalking me."

Sesshoumaru sat gingerly at the back of her bicycle. He studied the two-wheeled contraption with interest, then wobbled with his life when she started to move. "Grab on to me," she had said, but the memories of getting zapped with _reiki_ were still fresh in his mind. His hand quickly caught on the handlebar behind his seat.

Kagome shook her head as she cycled their way home, grateful that it was a weekday and the streets were almost empty. What if someone took a picture of him and uploaded it on social media? What with his long silver hair and elfin ears, and the Hello Kitty apron that didn't look as funny as it did anymore when she first bought it? She sighed and looked back at him.

"Hey. Do you even realize the gravity of the situation? I'm sorry, but you gotta accept this. You're a paranormal being, Sesshoumaru. Things like you don't go walking around in the neighbourhood, _ever_."

When they got back home, the first thing Kagome did was to plug the television back, and quieted him down with an episode of _Gaki no Tsukai_. She returned the urn to its proper place, placing it back at the altar.

 _He can leave the house now. It means he's gained strength._ She bit her finger, trying to muster a deep breath to compose herself. She glanced at Sesshoumaru outside, who sat motionless before the screen, not laughing at the zany antics on the TV show when anyone normal would.

 _What if he tries to leave the house again? He knows nothing about how the world works._

"I'm going back to the shrine," she told him after she had washed her face. "Please don't leave the house again without my permission, okay? And take care of yourself." Kagome paused. She was starting to sound like a domineering mother.

Sesshoumaru said nothing. He had not spoken a word the whole journey back until then.

Back in the shrine, Kagome fingered the empty amulets in the souvenir store that were yet to be customized and blessed. They took the shape of a small empty vial, looped with a piece of cord. She pocketed one in her pants, tossing a coin into the cashier register.

"So what was the emergency back home, Kagome-sama?" Amari asked while they were closing the shrine for the day. "I've never seen you so flustered before."

"I uh, forgot to turn off the tap."

"Oh dear!"

"Please sweep the floors faster, ladies!" the head priest barked near them. "Dusk is falling!"

* * *

Sesshoumaru stared at the amulet that Kagome had placed in his palm.

"I put the soil from the urn inside it," she told him. Seeing the quizzical frown on his face, she explained further. "It means that you don't need to bring that urn around with you when you go out. Here, let me put it on for you—"

"No, do _not_ touch me."

Kagome narrowed her eyes. "I noticed it for some time now. It's like you have some sort of aversion when it comes to being touched. Don't want my grubby human fingers on you, is that it?"

"I will keep this with me." Sesshoumaru grasped the amulet. "How far will this sustain me?"

"I don't think you can go around too far with that amulet. And besides I won't allow it. It's a dangerous world out there, Sesshoumaru."

"Is there anything more than dangerous than a _daiyoukai_ who seeks to attain knowledge?"

Kagome wanted to tell him in the 21st century a _daiyoukai_ was nothing but a figment of folklore, but decided he would learn this himself. She twisted her mouth and sat beside him, watching another episode of Ripley's on the screen, something about a washed-up mermaid's skeleton.

"Give me time. I'll make further arrangements for you."

"Further arrangements. Such as?"

"Such as sorting out your face. And getting new clothes. I was just thinking about it. I can't keep you locked in here forever. You've been always a creature of freedom. Naturally you'll be curious." She hugged her knees and sighed. "I must have overlooked this part when I did the after-ritual. I guess I must identify you now as a proper person with proper needs, just that they differ slightly from us humans."

"Just like I was once, five hundred years ago."

She nodded and hung her head. She didn't want to think about it.

Minutes later, as if having ascertained something, Kagome straightened her legs and stood up, her knees creaking. "Well, I'm going to bed now. So goodnight."

"Thank you."

Kagome stopped and stared back at him. Back then being polite was never one of Sesshoumaru's stronger points. Ah, why was she still thinking about the past? It was clear the Sesshoumaru then was not the same Sesshoumaru now.

 _A brand new person._ That's what she had told him that day. Otherwise she wouldn't be able to nag and hassle at him like she always did, would she? And he would never listen to her. Although sometimes, that stubborn streak still remained as strong.

"Anytime."

 ** _To be continued!_**


	5. The Look of Love

**The Look of Love**

Kagome leafed through the old magazine, a large lopsided grin etched on her face. A particular page turned up, showcasing an interview with a popular wrestler. A gaudy red mask donned over his eyes, his blonde hair tumbling down to his shoulders.

The _miko_ snickered as she read through the humorous interview that dug into the wrestler's personal life.

 _'What is your most favourite thing in the world?'_ was one of the silly questions posed. ' _Cruising through the Djitsun highway towards Aoyama during sunset_ ,' the wrestler had answered, ' _It has to be during sunset. And it has to be_ _in_ _my trusty old Yamaha SR500 bike._ '

"Higurashi!" Jyohaku called at the door entrance. Kagome yelped and hid the magazine in reflex. She didn't even hear the _shoji_ door to his office slide open.

Jyohaku strode towards her, quietly seething before he snatched the magazine from her hands, throwing it back in his drawer and slamming it shut.

"How many times have I told you—"

"To not snoop around your things, I know. But the magazine was on your table and…"

Jyohaku sat heavily in his chair and interlocked his fingers in a steeple, giving her a hard stare. "So tell me. Did you come into my office simply to welcome yourself to the contents on my table?"

Kagome sat before him, gazing at her shoes. "I apologize, Jyohaku-sama. I actually came here seeking for your advice."

"If you seek advice, then go call The Samaritans' hotline."

"Oh Jyohaku-sama. You're the head _priest_. At least impart me with your wisdom."

"So? Wisdom is something you gain from experience and acute observation, regardless of your vocation. And it's not like I became a priest out of my own calling…"

He stopped himself before more words could spill from his mouth, but she already knew what he meant. Yukino-jingu was a family shrine, and as per tradition, would be passed down the generations. The former head priest had been Jyohaku's father, and when the old man had succumbed to pancreatic cancer, Jyohaku's successful wrestling career too met its demise.

"It's frustrating, isn't it?" Kagome said. "To have that period of happiness just suddenly snatched away from you, with a cruel twist of fate. At one point, you thought it might have lasted forever. But I guess the gods had a different plan." Then she looked up and smiled at him. "But I believe, no matter how short-lived that happiness was, it must have taught us something. And it was definitely worth it, for what it was."

Jyohaku studied his right hand, at the coarse lines running across his palms, the hard calluses on his fingers. He clutched his fist. He was not sure what the _miko_ had went through, and as much as she was decidedly childish at times, he had figured very earlier on it was just a façade to hide the real tenacity sparkling in her eyes. Which was why she had persevered well through her time in the shrine when the others had quickly left after they joined. That Amari too. He would give her a few more months before she decided to call in quits—always quaking in her knees every time she saw him.

"Well, exactly what kind of advice are you seeking?" Jyohaku asked her. "I cannot promise I can give you the best…"

"Jyohaku-sama, do you believe that people will change when they have power stripped of them?"

He regarded her more seriously now, a frown pinched between his thick eyebrows. Where exactly was she heading, with such a question?

"Stripped of power? It's hard to say, but if you can garner from the opposite, then I suppose, yes."

"From the opposite?"

" _Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power,_ " he quoted. "Abraham Lincoln. The possession of power is definitely a dangerous thing to a weak mind. If you ever have a chance to wield it, in whatever context it may be, then tread wisely, Higurashi."

Kagome's eyes locked to his. He knew she understood, but to what degree that she could apply in her life, he didn't know. And then he saw briefly that fire, the tenacious one, the one that sometimes frightened even him, but strangely had intrigued his old man. Just thinking about what happened during that fateful exorcism was more than enough. Quickly he cleared his throat, taking interest in the accounts book on the table.

"Any further questions, Higurashi?"

"Well yeah," Kagome said. Her lopsided smile was back on her face, that hard glint in her eyes gone. She scratched her temple shyly. "It's a pretty strange question, but what kind of man's shirt size do you wear?"

Sesshoumaru hung near the window as he usually did every day, sometimes for hours on end. He still was finding difficulty reading the digital clock on the wall, even though Kagome had painstakingly taught him. That the number for '7" in front would mean she would be home anytime soon. Well, it was showing "7", and then the sun had set and it wasn't showing "7"anymore, but Kagome was still not home yet.

Did she know she _needed_ to return home on time? Sesshoumaru wondered. The breach in distance was too wide, for too long. She was too far away, from him.

An indiscernible, heavy sensation would grow in his chest each time she left for work, and would only be appeased when she returned to him. Television sometimes made him forget, but only for too long. It was as if there was another creature inside him, that thrived on their physical proximity and could only be comforted by the sound of her voice. In Kagome's absence, it would fidget and grate on his being like a bad toothache.

He had never related this to her. She had thought all along that he was attached to the soil inside the urn, the one from under the bridge. It was not adequate. He sought his energy from her being, from her _blood_.

Sesshoumaru had learned the hard way after the first day of the after-ritual when she had left for the shrine, and it had hurt him so much that he couldn't even move on the floor.

The days were getting better now. He could get by more easily, live in that discomfort, but still…

His head craned forward at the window, eyes fixed at the pathway leading towards the house. Her familiar shuffling footsteps, her soft scent, it was reaching him. Immediately he saw her—Kagome toddling home, carrying bags with her. The creature inside him stopped thrashing, lulled by her appearance.

Quickly Sesshoumaru rushed to his usual spot, the one before the television.

"I'm hoooome!" Kagome called out, her keys jingling in the entrance. She closed the door behind her, and greeted him with a large smile.

Sesshoumaru said nothing, seemingly invested in a drama series.

Her muscles groaned in agony, running after work to the nearby Isetan departmental store, but Kagome couldn't wait any longer. She raised the shopping bags in her arms. "Look what I got for you, Sesshoumaru! Come on, see what's in there!"

She removed the clothes from the packaging and Sesshoumaru felt the materials through his fingers. Kagome laughed at the way he smelled through each of them. He had reacted the same way too when she first bought the Hello Kitty apron.

"Do you like them?"

"It is not silk, but it will do."

"Oh shucks. I'm sorry I can't afford you a silk kimono. But first I have to teach you how to wear a shirt and a pair of trousers."

"Hmm," he said.

"I think you'll look very handsome indeed," Kagome said, unbuttoning a shirt.

Sesshoumaru gave her a quiet glance. "A _miko_ should not harbour such thoughts."

"What?" Kagome replied, almost laughing. "I'm not some kinda old-fashioned, goody-two-shoes priestess. If I was, I wouldn't have prayed to Inugami and sacrificed a--" She stopped herself, biting her lip. "Anyway what I mean is, you _are_ handsome. The most gorgeous _youkai_ I've ever met. And trust me, I've seen a whole damn lot of _youkai_ for an average person."

His lips quirked into a small smile, as she draped the shirt around him on his shoulders. "Even more than my half-brother?" he mused, just for the sake.

Kagome shook her head. She couldn't believe she was having this conversation with him.

Slowly she smoothed her hand down his clothed chest, absorbing his warmth into her skin. She could feel his steady heartbeat.

 _An actual, living pulse. A real person_. _Sesshoumaru. And you're here now, breathing, existing because of me._

"Stupid," she whispered. "I told you, you were the most gorgeous."

It wasn't him. This Sesshoumaru would never be bothered by her personal opinion of him. But the creature in his chest, the one that danced at the mere sight of her, had swelled up so much upon her soft whisper that even he, Sesshoumaru was finding it hard to breathe.

 ** _To be continued…_**

A/N: How could Kagome stay so calm while putting her hand on Sesshoumaru's chest? Even he is having a hard time XD


	6. Downtown

**Downtown**

 **A/N: Heya, this is one of the chapters I've been raring to write. Kagome finally takes Sesshoumaru out downtown!**

The weather was good. The skies were devoid of clouds, stretched blue as wide as the eyes could see and the sun was bright—but it was a good kind of bright, and not the headache-inducing kind that sometimes pierced through the windows and into his eyes.

Sesshoumaru hung the clothes to dry on the laundry line behind the house, securing them with wooden pegs. He could hear the theme song of a popular Japanese drama series blaring from the television inside. He needed to complete this task on hand, _now_.

" _Always whip the laundry before you hang it to dry!_ " her words echoed into his mind. " _That way they won't get wrinkled!_ "

He whipped the shirt with a startling vengeance.

"Ahhhhh, good morning!" A cheery, feminine voice broke out from the back door. It could only belong to one person—the mistress of the house. "Oh, you're doing laundry! Such an efficient housemate if I say so myself."

Sesshoumaru gave a slight glance. Kagome had an extra-large smile on her face, the one that meant an agenda up her sleeves.

"No need to cook today, alright?" she told him. "We'll be having lunch outside!"

"Noted."

"Yes! I'm going to bring you out to town today! And hopefully we'll get you some new clothes."

Sesshoumaru said nothing. He reached into the laundry basket, and Kagome's new expensive lace bra trailed from his grasp.

"Hey!" Kagome called out. "What did I say about washing my undergarments?! Hand wash only!"

Awhile later, Kagome drummed her fingers on the table top, looking at the wall clock. It was almost noon, and the sandwich breakfast she had two hours ago was paying no justice to her growling stomach.

Her bedroom door opened, and Sesshoumaru stepped out.

Kagome whistled. "Well, someone's looking _lit_."

Dressed in a lightweight sweatshirt and a pair of joggers that she had bought for him a week ago, they accentuated Sesshoumaru's tall, slim build, the top fitting his well-rounded shoulders just nicely. It was amazing how a simple change of clothes had altered his outward impression, so much so that upon a single glance he looked almost like a regular human male. Well, almost.

She shushed Sesshoumaru back into the room, and pulled him before the dresser mirror.

"There's just a teensy-weensy problem," Kagome said, peering from behind. "Look into the mirror. Do you see what I see?"

Sesshoumaru raised his head, and squinted condescendingly at his reflection. He preferred his traditional robes than anything else—at least he appeared regal and self-important in them. "I see a ruthless, dangerous _daiyoukai_ out to conquer this world that he has set his eyes upon."

Kagome laughed nervously. "Yes, and he needs some form of disguise if he intends to go shopping, doesn't he?"

And suddenly she yanked down a beanie from nowhere down his face, and the pair resisted each other in a peculiar struggle, as Sesshoumaru worked to remove the offending piece of material from his eyes.

" _Release_ me this instant!"

"You need to hide your pointy ears and your light hair and those funny markings on your scary demon face…"

"Why should I? And those marking are not to be made light of; they are bearings of the noble _inu-youkai_ clan, of which only esteemed members of the aristocracy are…"

An hour later, Sesshoumaru found himself seated in a café, staring at an abstract painting on the wall as Kagome scarfed on her fish and chips in a gluttony manner. Beanie on his head.

"Ohomon, wa dee wong fesh?" Kagome remarked through big spoon-fuls of fried dory. _Oh come on, why the long face?_ She promptly swallowed her food. "I know you're not used to it–but look on the bright side, you can walk through the crowd without anyone getting a heart attack. That's good for a start, isn't it?"

Sesshoumaru lashed her a glare. "I have never found the need to blend myself among humans. And I never will."

Kagome pouted and poked her fish with her fork. "Well you gotta now, if you intend to go outside."

After her meal was done, she went to the cashier to pay the bill. Sesshoumaru had picked nothing from the menu, and whether it was because he really found no interest in actual food, or that he was too in a surly mood to eat, she wasn't quite sure.

When she turned back, he was gone. Kagome rushed out from the café in panic.

She saw him standing in a middle of a group of students some distance away. All of them were crowding around him in open-mouthed awe, whispering in amazement. His beanie was past gone and his long, silver hair was cascading down his shoulders in proud waves.

"Crap!" Kagome made a mad dash towards the group, squeezing desperately through their bodies until she finally got a hold of him.

"You look so cool!" a boy gushed.

"Your ears are like the real deal! It's crazy!" another girl cried.

"Sir, what character are you cosplaying? Or is it like an original that you designed?" another boy enquired.

Kagome's face twitched as she faced the hoard of students. "H-hold on. You guys think he's cosplaying?"

"Well, duh!" said the girl who had complimented on Sesshoumaru's ears. "This town is famous for its cosplayers roaming around the street. After all, the Tokyo Cosplay Committee is just a few blocks away!"

Sesshoumaru and Kagome stared at each other.

"You mentioned people would drop their things and scurry for safety at the actual sight of this Sesshoumaru," he said.

"Is that why you removed your beanie? So you could test that theory?"

"Indeed. Although it seems to have backfired—they actually seem impressed."

"Hey! We wanna take a selfie with you!" the girl chirped again.

"Well I'll be. Thank god for cosplay," Kagome muttered, dragging him away from the students as they called out in protest.

They strolled along the shops, looking for a suitable place to shop for clothes. Suitable meant quiet and discreet, away from the astonished reactions of passer-bys that rewarded their every step. Kagome could only be comforted by a single thought. _At least they think he's still human. Weirdo or not._

"What is a "SALE"?" Sesshoumaru enquired, pointing to a large sign outside a Uniqlo store.

"It means the clothes are selling at a discount."

"What is a discount?"

But Sesshoumaru was mumbling to himself, as he strode into the store on his own, leaving a peeved Kagome behind.

"I shall acquire this, and this and this..."

"Hello mister," Kagome snapped around the bale of clothes Sesshoumaru was tossing in her arms as he rounded all the displays, "do you think this is your father's shop?!"

"I was unaware shopping could be such a…" Sesshoumaru chose his words carefully as he continued down the redbrick-paved streets, a panting Kagome behind as she lugged his shopping bags, "… _therapeutic_ experience."

"Of course it's therapeutic," Kagome wheezed, "when you're not the one paying for it!"

"I see a peculiar structure in the far distance. Enlighten me, _miko_." Sesshoumaru went, pointing ahead. _If it's another sale sign, I swear I'm gonna run amok,_ Kagome thought. She looked up, and her line of sight met the large, conspicuous steel rim of a Ferris Wheel from afar, its lights softly blinking in warm nostalgia.

"There's an amusement park up front," she said, and she smiled, her weariness disappearing. "I haven't there gone there since high school."

Kagome and Sesshoumaru sat across each other inside the Ferris Wheel. She was flat against her seat, collecting her breath, the shopping bags huddled at the empty spot beside her. As if the clothes were not enough, she had brought him to a few game stalls earlier on, and in each stall they had won a prize. Now she had _two_ jumbo-sized teddy bears to hog home. _Is he just lucky or what?_

Sesshoumaru was distracted in his own silence. His eyes soaked in the breath-taking scenery outside of the bustling metropolis fringed by the dark blue ocean, a few centuries too late.

She stared at his hand glued against the window glass. At his deadly-looking finger-claws.

"Do you mind if I ask something?" she said. Sesshoumaru gave no response. "Why were you haunting that old bridge?"

His fingers twitched, and he blinked. "I was waiting," he answered after some time.

 _Waiting for what? Waiting for who?_ Kagome wanted to ask. Darn it, there were so many other questions she had. Questions he wouldn't answer properly. No, he seemed rather content to not remember anything….or maybe, he actually _did_ remember. If that was the case, then he was wrapping her around his finger, wasn't he, occasionally throwing her bits of information here and there as and when he saw fit.

She didn't know what was the truth anymore, or if there was any point in seeking it. Suddenly Kagome felt as though it wasn't her who had been in control all along, but rather he, Sesshoumaru, who had her waiting by his hand…

Kagome watched the pink sky, the fading sun heading towards the horizon. "I guess it's pretty late. And we've already got the clothes you wanted." She laid back, staring at the steel ceiling, but not really staring.

"You know the last time I took this Ferris Wheel?" she spoke again. "I was only fifteen, and I was by myself. Ha. Who the hell goes to the amusement park alone to take the Ferris Wheel? Anyway my point is, the scenery outside the window never changes. The buildings near the sea line may be new, but the way the sky changes its colour, and the way the sea glitters when the sun dips down—it has always been the same."

"This Sesshoumaru requires to feed," he then said.

"Huh?" Kagome went, sitting straight up. "I have some donuts I bought just now…"

"Not your kind of feed," he said, "but my kind."

Kagome narrowed her eyes at him in disbelief. "There is a proper time and a proper place for that. Goodness, if someone were to see us, they'll think we're into some kinky business. Ah, you don't even know what kinky means."

Sesshoumaru gave her the side eye, the one she had come to be completely immune to. "I know what kinky means. Remember how I said that I interpret words through their intent."

"Oh shut up."

Kagome flicked the amulet hanging by his neck after they got down from the bus, and were making their way back home. She remembered the dirty looks from the passengers. But he remained oblivious, or rather he did not seem to care.

"Better than bringing that urn around, right?" she said. Sesshoumaru wanted to tell her the amulet was pointless when she was beside him, but kept it to himself. As they rounded a corner, Kagome put up a hand to stop them.

"One last stop beforehand," Kagome said. "This is important for you, Sesshoumaru. Anytime when I'm not home, and you gotta run for groceries, this is the place you go to," and she gestured to an unassuming settlement hulking before them beside a faulty streetlight, "the Family Mart!"

There was a young man squatting outside its premises, a cigarette burning between his fingers. The moment he saw Kagome approaching the doors, he quickly shot up and tossed his cigarette into a bin, and wiped his hands behind his jeans.

"Kagome-sama, welcome!"

"Heyyy!"

He greeted them with a short bow at the doors, and Sesshoumaru casted a glance at his nametag: _Ichiro_.

Sesshoumaru stared until the young man ducked his head.

"This is where you get the eggs," Kagome pointed, as she guided him through a tour of the store, which as modest as it appeared, packed almost everything and anything she might need. "And this is the frozen section…"

"So I am expected to keep track the food supplies at home now," Sesshoumaru stated, as she went on to teach him how to compare a good tomato, and a bad one.

"Oh don't give that face. Not _totally_. I mean, I'm still in-charge of the overall expenditure, but in case we're short of sugar or flour, you won't need to wait for me anymore. I guess this also means you'll have better freedom in your cooking plans, and not just restricted to whatever's in the fridge."

"Hn. Understood."

Kagome placed her basket on the counter. She smiled at the young man from before. "It's just you today, Ichiro-kun?"

"Yeah, Asano called in sick last minute," Ichiro muttered, scanning her items. He stole a glance at Sesshoumaru beside Kagome. The weird-looking guy had been staring at him non-stop ever since he stepped into the store. _He_ should be the one doing the staring—because what's up with that get-up, man? Nobody cosplays at this part of the neighbourhood.

"Ah hey," Kagome said, realizing the two had set eyes on each other, "by the way Ichiro-kun, this is Sesshoumaru, my, uh, friend. He's new here, so anytime you see him in the store, do say hello!"

"That boy in the store," Sesshoumaru later said, when they were home and he was helping her to sort out the groceries. The meat in the freezer, the salt and oil in the cabinets. "I do not like him."

"Gee Sesshoumaru, that's not a nice thing to say about someone you just met. I mean he does look a bit unique, but--"

"I do not care about being nice. It is a petty form of diplomacy born to conform to a social construct." He exhaled a deep breath. "I did not like you either when we first met."

Kagome snorted a laugh. "You mean when I exorcised the hell out of you."

"No. When you pulled out my father's fang from the ground."

She stared at him for a moment, the tomato denting in her hand.

"You know what, I think it's possible after all," she said. "That you're just purposely withholding information from our past."

"You slander me."

"Yeah, right."

"This Sesshoumaru requires to feed."

"There you go again, changing the subject."

A quiet growl rumbled from him, so soft it sounded like a purr from his chest. He frowned and tugged on her sleeve.

Kagome rolled her eyes. She sighed.

"I just don't know what to do with you sometimes," she said. "Go on, then. Wait for me by the altar."

As Kagome proceeded to take a knife and a bowl, the steel blade meeting blood, she wondered to herself just who was binded to whom.

 ** _To be continued!_**

 ** _[A/N: If I don't stop myself, this would just go on and on…]_**


	7. Dolphin in the Sky

Disclaimer: 'Summer of 69' lyrics written by Bryan Adams, James Douglas Vallance

 _Standing on your mama's porch_

 _You said that it'd last forever_

 _Oh, and when you held my hand_

 _I knew it was now or never_

 _Those were the best days of my life_

- **Summer of '69** , Bryan Adams

 **Dolphin in the Sky**

 _"It's not the same," Kagome countered beside him._

 _His dark eyebrows furrowed at the cloudy, summer sky._

 _"What? What's not the same?"_

 _"That cloud. You said it looks like a dolphin. Well, it doesn't."_

 _He crossed his arms underneath his head, the tall grass prickling against his arms. He sneered._

 _"Keh. You're speaking as if you've seen a dolphin in real life."_

 _"Excuse me. I've seen plenty of those in the Tokyo Aqua Park. How about you--have you even seen an actual dolphin before?"_

 _His nose scrunched in annoyance. The scent of her sweat lightly graced his nostrils, and for a moment Inuyasha was suddenly aware of just how close Kagome was, lying beside him on the grass._

 _"I'm telling you, it looks like a goddamned dolphin."_

 _Kagome rolled her eyes. The large slow-moving formation, cottony and wispy at the edges belied no characteristics whatsoever of said animal. There was no dorsal fin that the eyes could shape, or a snout maybe, or a tail. She didn't know which part of the cloud exactly screamed "dolphin" to Inuyasha. As usual, there was always something to disagree with him, even during a lazy, relaxing activity of lying in a meadow._

 _"Idiot," she said._

 _"Know-it-all."_

 _A cicada hopped near his ear on the grass, chirping. He instantly sat up to swat it away. Kagome stared at him as he tossed his head to shake off the offending insect, a string of vehement curses trailing from his mouth._

 _She could do it if she really wanted to. She could just reach out and touch his back. He was that close to her. She wondered in a year's time, as of now, would things remain the way they were now? A year from now, could she still manage to find time to lay beside him on the grass, arguing about dolphins, a cicada in his ear…_

 _"Ne, Inuyasha."_

 _"What?" he went, his voice exasperated._

 _Kagome smiled to herself. She could see the dolphin he had been referring to, although subtle, its head springing out from the left edge._

 _"Nothing."_

Kagome woke up with a start. Her eyes automatically darted to her alarm clock, and she shot out a curse.

Minutes later she was whizzing past the kitchen (where Sesshoumaru was carefully stirring a pot of soup) and ran straight to the house entrance where she squeezed frantically into her shoes. By the time Sesshoumaru peeked out from the kitchen, his head slipping through the noren curtain, Kagome had already disappeared.

"I wish I could be as enthusiastic as you," Kagome grumbled in the shrine hall as she wiped the windows with a rag, "doing spring-cleaning on a Monday morning."

Amari managed a sheepish smile as she wrung her rag over a bucket. Kagome-sama must have woken from the wrong side of the bed. "If the head priest wishes it, then it will be done so!"

"Do you know that man is impossible to please?" Kagome threw her rag on the floor and proceeded to sit down instead, hands folded tight. "Trust me, I've been working in this shrine for three years. There is always something to nit-pick."

"That's what you say, but the both of you are closer than any of his apprentices have been. Even Atsushi says he treats you differently. Oh, I really miss Atsushi. He left us so abruptly."

As Amari said this, the two shrine maidens could distinctly hear the loud barrage of rock music blaring from Jyohaku's office. Kagome glared. "Just _hear_ that. He is nothing like the former head priest at all!"

"Eh?" Amari paused her vigorous wiping. "Didn't he pass on before Jyohaku-sama took over? How did you know him?"

Kagome gave a deep sigh, a contemplative look on her face.

"Well… It happened many years ago, but it was partly because of the old priest that I decided to come and serve in Yukino-jingu."

"See, that's what I mean, Kagome-sama. You're even acquainted with his late dad."

Suddenly Amari peered outside the window, towards the _tori_ gate of the shrine. "Ah, looks like we have a guest!" She promptly dropped her rag into the bucket and the dirty soap water splashed, hitting Kagome's face.

Amari ran out to welcome the shrine visitor. However she returned mere minutes later, looking anxious.

"Kagome-sama," she murmured. "The visitor… He looks scary. I think he is one of those weird _otaku_ guys. You know, the kind that likes to cosplay."

Kagome sprang up and grabbed her partner intently by the shoulders, her eyes holding a death-stare. "Amari-chan, does this guy happen to look like one of those elf creatures from Lord of the Rings?"

"Yes! But ah, he's wearing a Hello Kitty apron though…" Amari looked on in wonderment as the older woman dashed out from the hall as if it were a matter of life and death.

It was too late. She saw that the head priest outside had met the visitor first. It _really_ was Sesshoumaru at the shrine entrance, in his usual robes and Hello Kitty apron. Her jaw dropped.

Kagome swore she could feel an electric charge buzzing in the air between the two equally intimidating figures, who were appraising each other in a face-off. Sesshoumaru and Jyohaku. Their names should never be in a same sentence. Bad news, bad news! The latter especially, was stock-still in surprise.

Kagome found herself cowering behind a pillar.

 _Holy mother of… why? Why do I feel a storm approaching?_

Sesshoumaru removed his hard stare from the baffled priest. Something more important seemed to have stolen his attention. He strode towards the pillar where Kagome was hiding.

"Your lunch," he said simply, pushing a _bento_ box into the withering _miko_ 's hands. Then he turned and strode past the priest without another word, and out through the _tori_ gate, his shoes clacking self-importantly against the stone.

Kagome stared incredulously at the warm _bento_ box in her hand. He came all the way here just to...

Jyohaku's jaw tensed, as Amari ran forward to reach beside him. "Who on earth was that?" she called, as she watched the mysterious stranger descend the cobbled shrine steps.

A deep frown sullied the priest's face. That strange man had a peculiar pair of eyes, and it was somewhat familiar…

"Housemate?" Amari said later during the day, as she bit into a fishball. The two _miko_ were having lunch at the garden benches. "You're telling me that all your recent amazing _bento_ sets were prepared by him, Kagome-sama? But if he's a guy, and he's living with you, wouldn't that make him your boy-"

Kagome almost choked. "Where did you get that? He cooks and cleans after me in exchange for shelter, that's all!"

"So…he's a butler?" Amari suggested innocently.

Kagome scratched her head sheepishly. "Well I guess you could say that."

Amari sighed in relief, smiling. "You must be really lucky, Kagome-sama! You'll always have someone to talk to. I thought you were lonely living on your own, especially when your family is so faraway."

Immediately a scenario unravelled in Kagome's head, that of her and Sesshoumaru curled at the warm _kotatsu_ table, peeling oranges as they laughed over outrageous gossip.

Nah-uh. Not in a million years.

"So he really isn't your boyfriend, huh?"

"I told you he's not!" Kagome crammed a deep-fried _unagi_ into her mouth. By golly, the lunches just kept getting better. Trust Sesshoumaru to know she loved eel.

Amari poked her rice with her chopsticks, then she suddenly beamed with a suspicious brightness. "Well…in that case, let's go out on a date one day, shall we? I really, really wanna introduce you to my brother!"

"Amari-chan…"

Kagome changed into her pajamas after her hot bath. Once again an array of dishes was waiting for her on the table for dinner. She sat down and grabbed her chopsticks and was about to chow down her food, when she stopped.

"Ne, Sesshoumaru," she called out to him from the dining area. He was at the living room watching television as usual. "Would you like to join me for dinner?"

He responded very slowly. "This is a very informative documentary being aired right now. The internal structure of the Giza Pyramids--"

She rolled her eyes. "You don't have to if you don't want to."

Awhile later he appeared. He sat quietly at the low table, his back erect, his glazed golden eyes staring at nothing in particular as usual.

"The grilled _saba_ fish tastes nice," Kagome commented, picking on its flesh with her chopsticks. "Thank you."

Sesshoumaru said nothing. Kagome swallowed her food slowly.

"Hey, Sesshoumaru. Have you… Have you seen a dolphin before?"

Her housemate turned to give her his most dumbfounded expression yet, his eyebrows raised so high it was almost comical. And she thought his face had been chiselled in ivory.

"A…dolphin?"

She nodded, giggling. "Yes. I'll bring you to the Tokyo Aqua Park to see the fishes one day. You'll enjoy that, won't you?"

Sesshoumaru blinked slowly, then looked away. He studied his lap for a long time, so long in fact that she thought he had shut himself up like he always did, and the conversation was over.

"I will go where ever you go," he said quietly at last.

 ** _To be continued..._**

A/N: Why a dolphin? I don't know, it just kinda appeared in my head haha. Anyway do take note that Kagome does not actually remember her dreams containing her memories (with Inuyasha for example, at the start of the chapter). It stayed repressed in her subsconsious mind, until she was eating fish for dinner, and she sorta went, "Let's talk about dolphins."

Kinda sad, huh.


	8. Bliss in Ignorance

**Bliss in Ignorance**

"Hey, watch it! That box contains artefacts at least a thousand years old!"

"Careful now! Load everything slowly on the lorry!"

Kagome chuckled to herself as she watched the noisy scene before her. She was at her mother's house, doing a little visiting. Apparently the movers had arrived first when she came, shifting out the huge boxes from their shed.

Souta, now a tall, 18-year-old was running around with them, making sure they were moving the right boxes, and cautiously. Once in awhile he would go, "You guys are going the wrong way!" or "Not that one—that contains the garden tools!"

At last he joined his sister and mother at the side, wiping the sweat off his forehead.

"You need to keep telling them they're carrying prized possessions," he sighed on his haunches, "or they'll just lug everything around like airport cargo."

"But aren't these movers the ones despatched by the National Archives Museum?" Mrs Higurashi wondered aloud.

"Gee, it's like you guys are moving from the house," Kagome laughed.

"Oh no, Kagome," her mother said. "You know we would never do that. The Higurashis have been staying at this ancestral house for more than 5 generations."

Souta looked over his shoulder, to the house that he had been staying at all his life. A morbid thought came to him. "Must be a lot of people that died in the house, then."

Suddenly his late grandpa surfaced from his memory. Gramps hadn't died in the house—he had died in the hospital surrounded by his loved ones. And in his will he had mentioned that the ancient treasures that he had devoted his life to caring, be donated to the National Archives Museum so people could learn about them. Maybe, deep inside the old man knew there was no one in the family he could depend on to delegate the task.

Souta sighed. He had been engrossed in his baseball games all these years, trying to score a place in the national team. Which he had succeeded, by the way. He had no right to feel disappointed that the family heirloom would now be showcased in glass boxes, where people would have to pay a ticket to see them.

As if sensing his thoughts, his sister placed a warm hand on his shoulder. "It's about time anyway, Souta," she said. Souta looked away. His sister was no longer as sentimental, her emotions more guarded now. Sometimes it was like she conveniently forgot about everything that happened.

Kagome walked towards the shed, taking care not to obstruct the busy movers. It had been a long time since she last stepped inside since she moved from her hometown. It was almost empty now, the shelves encased in a thick layer of dust, a mere shell of what it used to be: a vault of magical ancient treasures.

She swiped a cob-web near her head. _If Gramps was still here he would have taken care of everything thoroughly. Speaking of ancient…_

Something pricked her mind. Slowly she sauntered out from the shed, then walked towards the shack which housed the old well.

As she expected, it was locked with a large, heavy padlock. A large _fuda_ paper talisman was pasted on the doors, indecipherable kanji scribbled on it, wrinkled and faded with age. It was different than the usual ones Gramps used. After all it had been issued by the late head priest of Yukino-jingu, when he had come to bless the well ten years ago.

It almost felt like a forgotten dream, fuzzy at its edges. Kagome could vaguely remember that painful period, when the well had suddenly sealed itself in the middle of her epic adventure, during Naraku's final battle. _Naraku_. Even that name sounded so unfamiliar to her now. But following that event, she had fell into a great depression for several years--she lost a lot of weight and got dropped out from college. Her grandfather was sure she had been cursed, and called the same priest to help her.

"She's not cursed," he had told her family. "She has a powerful spiritual energy inside her, but it's unable to flow. Something is blocking her channels."

Kagome smiled to herself as she touched the curled edge of the talisman.

"Once upon a time, I thought my feudal fairytale would have lasted forever."

"Sis, why are you talking to yourself?" Souta called from the back. "Is dinner at Ryoutaro's still on?"

Back in the train on the way home, Kagome drifted into sleep. She was rudely awakened by a vibrating buzz of her phone. Squinting, she read through the long chain of messages in the group chat.

"What, Eri is getting married already?" she whispered in disbelief. "Yuka's engaged, Ayumi's kid is a year-old now." She released a long sigh. "And then there's me."

She blinked to herself, staring at the train advertisements on the ceiling. Then she remembered something, and hastily dialled a number.

 _Speaking of incoming weddings, I wonder how's_ he _doing?_

"Moshi moshi," a young male voice answered.

"Hello, Atsushi. It's Kagome. Do you remember me?"

There was a pause. "Kagome-sama!" he then went in surprise. "Of course, I remember you. You were the only person who's managed to beat me in Go."

Kagome giggled at the memory. "Say, I haven't heard from you for so long. How are you and Saeko? You said your wedding would be in this year, wouldn't it?"

"Yes, it would be this summer at the Royal Ginza Hotel. Watch out for my invitation card!" Kagome laughed. "By the way, are you still working at the shrine, with Amari and Jyohaku?"

"Yes, yes I am."

He sighed. "You're a strong woman. There was no way I could continue to work there, not after _that_ incident." He went silent for a while. "Kagome-sama. I still get nightmares…over that thing."

 _That thing…_ Her thoughts diverged. _That thing is living in my house now._

He continued. "It's completely shattered the way I see the world now. It's just crazy." Kagome heard another woman's voice on the line, presumably his fiancé. "I'm sorry, I gotta go now. Thanks for calling though, Kagome-sama."

The dial tone signalled the end of the call. She pulled away her phone, disliking the sound it made.

Kagome walked slowly towards the dark pathway to her house. Maybe it was the lamplight doing tricks, or just plain fatigue. But she swore she saw a little figure playing at her door. It was gone in a second, and the first thought that went through her mind was, _I really need a soak in the tub and a beer._

She entered the old storeroom as the bathtub filled itself. The altar at the corner glowed quietly.

"You know what's good right now?" she told herself, as she reached the antique phonograph by the window, then realized she had been talking a lot to herself that day. The phonograph belonged to the old _miko_ who was the previous occupant, stacks of dusty vinyl records laid at its side. "Some music. Some music is good."

And then she slipped into her warm bath, sipping a can of Asahi Dry as the melodic voice of Doris Day filled her house.

 _You won't admit you love me_

 _And so how am I ever to know?_

 _You always tell me_

 _Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps_

Something splashed on her face, and her eyes flew open. Her body jerked. Her house was strangely quiet, and Sesshoumaru was kneeling by the tub.

"You lucky son of a—"

"You fell asleep," he said.

Kagome groaned inwardly. Her beer can was floating in the water. She found herself covering her chest from him, then stopped herself. _Why? It's not like he sees me as a woman, anyway_.

"I mopped all the floors today," he announced in a mighty voice. "I cleared the trash."

"Mmm, good boy," she mumbled. She kneaded her temples—she could feel a migraine coming. Then she saw the way his hands were curled around the edge of the tub, and that look on his face, that round-eyed look—

She pretended not to understand. She filched the beer can out from the water, and aimed for the trash can beneath the sink. It dropped inside effortlessly, and she laid her head back.

Kagome shook her head. "Sesshoumaru, I'm tired of this. Really, I am. I'm tired of playing the waiting game. You gotta tell me something, anything. And you know exactly what I'm talking about here. Don't act coy with me."

"And what is it that you wish to hear?" he replied at last.

She exhaled slowly, frowning. She didn't know why it was suddenly so difficult to say it out. _What is it? What is it that's really important—that I need to know?_

 _Or am I just scared—that it no longer matters?_

"If it's my half-brother that is in your mind," Sesshoumaru spoke, "then I can only say that he was well, _the last time I saw him_." He lightly fingered his chin. "In fact I remember that he had slightly put on weight."

Kagome stared at him in disbelief. "Idiot. If you can even remember such a small detail, you could have afford to remember everything else!"

"It was some time after you left. There was a fire that ravaged the village where he and his comrades lived in."

She sat up straight. "Fire? What fire?"

Her eyebrows slanted, quivering. _No, this can't be true. This is…this is the truth, isn't it? The truth I've been waiting for…_

"But Inuyasha survived, didn't he? You said the last time you saw him, he was…"

"Kagome," Sesshoumaru said steadily, looking into her eyes. "That is your name, no?"

Kagome was confused at first. Then his face softened. Another time, his eyes were saying. Why the rush? You're not ready for this. She found herself giving him an agonized smile. Once again, a dead end in the conversation.

She sat quietly for a few minutes in the water. Then her knees quaked as she slowly stood up from the tub. Sesshoumaru's eyes followed her. A peculiar white foam coated on her body.

"I'm gonna take a light shower now to wash the bubbles off. Go."

He shook his head. "This Sesshoumaru wishes to watch further."

He found himself reaching for the door after she threatened him with a wet kick. "Insufferable woman," Sesshoumaru muttered, swinging the door open.

"I _heard_ that, you stupid dog!"

 ** _To be continued…_**

 **[Credits: 'Perhaps Perhaps Perhaps' as written by Joe Davis, Osvaldo Farres**

 **A/N: In which Sesshoumaru finally calls her name but Kagome is too mad too notice! A lot of foreshadowing in this chapter! Wooooo! And I need to get that exorcism chapter out like asap… *cries]**


	9. Ghost on the Bridge

**Ghost on the Bridge**

 **[A/N: I would like to dedicate this chapter to all the readers who have been following this story religiously! Here it is finally! The fateful encounter!]**

 _Approximately a year ago…_

"I'm not going to lose this time, Kagome-sama. You may have gained an upper hand before, but it was a lucky fluke if I ever see one, and a fluke it is and nothing more."

"Then move your piece, Atsushi. The way your fingers are trembling, I would be worried if I were you. Don't want to make that same mistake of _accidentally_ pushing it into the wrong square again, do we?"

"I _told_ you, the board was slippery."

If stares could blind, Kagome and Atsushi would be stabbing sharp daggers into each other's eyes, white-hot sparks flashing between their tensed, adamant faces. Just thenin the middle of that crucial, determining match of _Go_ —where both parties had wagered their prides and of what flimsy skills they had—came a urgent series of footsteps stomping against the wooden floorboards of Yukino-Jingu, approaching their room.

"Atsushi! Higurashi! We have a _harae_ appointment to catch!" a rough voice barked. The door slammed open, revealing Jyohaku's large figure, his face turning from resolute to eye-twitchingly livid in a matter of seconds.

"Why the hell are you both playing board games at a time like this?!"

"A _what_ called?" Atsushi asked, as the three of them gathered into Jyohaku's car. The young training priest—who was but only on a part-time stint, and, if anyone asked, was trying to save up for a special something for a special someone—clicked on his seatbelt and swiped back his floppy fringe poking his eyes.

I should really have my bangs cut soon, he scolded himself, this thing is going to make me blind one day, I swear. Maybe he should get Saeko to do it, but Saeko herself had been so busy these few weeks over at her fancy-schmancy white Ginza office, while _he_ was stuck down here wiping shrine floors and manning the souvenir store. As a modern, technology-embracing young Japanese guy, he didn't even believe in any of these spiritual shi—

"A construction company," Jyohaku said again as his Honda Vezel roared to life, snapping Atsushi's thoughts instantly. "Mr Kawabata is his name. He's the surveyor for his company. He's called for a _harae_ to be performed at his construction site someplace in Kiba, where they're are going to build a holiday villa. Says there's been too many accidents, and work has been halted for too long."

"A-accidents?" Atsushi gulped.

"Falling trees. Missing machinery. Sixteen struck with an inexplicable illness in the hospital as we speak. That sort of thing."

Kagome turned to the paling Atsushi sitting in the front seat. "Atsushi, this is your first time assisting a purification ritual, isn't it? It's mostly a routine job for us."

"Why didn't you just make Amari go with you guys? I can help keep an eye on the shrine on her behalf."

Jyohaku rapped him with his folded, wooden fan and Atsushi howled. "Grow a pair, would you, boy! The shrine doesn't accept pansies! Really, you youngsters and your pampered, cosy lives. I bet you have never experienced a full-blown uppercut, or a paralysing body fold takedown, have you?"

"Why the hell should I?!"

At the back of the car where she sat alone, Kagome shifted restlessly. A foreboding rumble was spreading out inside her stomach, almost in sync with the low growling of the car's engine.

The construction site was in an untouched, forested area against the sprawling backdrop of the Midoriyama mountains, at least a kilometre away from the nearest settlement. A good spot for a scenic vacation. And also the habitat of animals and spirits alike. It was likely an unseen presence living in the area had felt threatened by the deforestation, and was punishing the construction workers who had dared interfered with its home.

Jyohaku spoke in grave tones with the surveyor, who was pointing to a damaged stone bridge over a stretch of river that ran deeper into the forest. _If_ you could call it a bridge. The gloomy, weathered-beaten stone formation looked like it had become one with the forest; green with moss, lichens and whatnot, and choking with tangled vines.

The bridge was also emanating a strong aura of depression, and though someone had covered it with a dark blanket.

"Higurashi," Jyohaku called. Kagome trained her head close to listen beside him, as Atsushi eyed them suspiciously from where he stood. "It all started when they started to demolish the bridge. This is even serious than I thought." He paused. "Two people have actually died in the hospital."

Kagome tensed, lines appearing on her forehead as she stared at the bridge ahead. "There's an unclean presence corroding on the bridge," she informed. "I can… I can sense an overwhelming glut of emotions all around—anger, sorrow, _guilt_ —so much so that I can't name some of them. It's pretty much anchored itself to this place."

Jyohaku nodded. Kagome's clairvoyant abilities were not mystifying—in fact it was one of the many things his old man had divulged to him many years ago, subsequent to meeting her for the first time. His wrinkly hand that held a sake cup had quivered in excitement as he related to Jyohaku how a family had arrived into their shrine with their troubled daughter. Her eyes had bore a startling wealth of _reiki_ , a raging fire that was as bright as it was subdued.

But at that time Kagome was but a mere high-schooler, while Jyohaku's only interest in life was winning that night's wrestling match.

Kagome and Atsushi stood in attentive deference as Jyohaku initiated the ceremony. There were standing under a makeshift shelter erected by the workers, where an altar of offerings had been set up beforehand for the priest to bless.

He bowed low to the offerings, folded fan clutched in his hand. A low, intense liturgy murmured from his lips, as ancient words reverberated throughout the quiet shelter. It gave Atsushi the strangest chills, like something born from his deepest fears.

Slowly Atsushi and Kagome trailed the priest from behind as he neared the bridge. He circled its perimeter, chanting as he shook a _harai-gushi_ , or purification wand, vehemently in the act of hitting.

Kagome bit her lower lip. It was slightly bruised. Which meant she had been biting it more than she wanted to admit. The heavy sensation in her chest had hardened into something almost tangible, like a small stone of anxiety. With each step forward, the wind started to moan louder, ominous and foreboding, and she saw Atsushi quaking beside her, his teeth chattering.

She had never felt so nervous performing a _harae_ before. Something was different this time. Something that was capable of inflicting hurt, of inflicting _death._

 _When was the last time I felt something like this?_ Hadn't that been ten years or so, fighting demons in that parallel world inside the old well? But that had been so long ago, its truth refuted even by her closed ones—and it scared her now how eerily similar her body was reacting to the current circumstances, the disturbingly familiar rush of cold blood, the tingling chill in her spine.

Suddenly a sharp gust whipped through them, the wind evolved into a whistling gale. The workers cried out as the makeshift shelter swayed and collapsed together with the altar of offerings. A bulldozer nearby turned over in the wind, crashing loudly in an explosion of sound.

"The heck—" Atsushi shouted. It started the moment the priest began sprinkling salt at the bridge. He heard the loud cracking of branches around him, the air howling a strange song. The little hairs at the back of his neck prickled up. It wasn't a coincidence. Bulldozers don't crash from the wind in a place where people have mysteriously gotten sick and died, out of coincidence. Something was orchestrating these events, something he struggled to make sense from his logical understanding of the world.

And then he saw it, the _thing_ , right before his eyes and everything just shattered.

An apparition swirled before him, a dark haze in the figure of a man, except it did not look human—a pair of burning embers for eyes, pointed fangs of a beast, snow-white hair. It roared deeply a growl of a thousand lions, the unworldly sound twisting into the howl of the wind as it echoed within Atsushi's own body, permeating through each pore and opening, until all he felt was the inevitable darkness, and the throat-gripping fear as his senses left him.

"Atsushi!" Kagome and Jyohaku called at the same time, as the young man buckled and crumpled to his knees.

"Do not touch him!" Jyohaku shouted.

Atsushi moved his head, but his neck was strangely limp.

" _You humans will regret and pay for this destruction you have caused,"_ he snarled in a strange, deep voice. A threatening growl whirred from him.

Kagome stayed rooted to her spot, her mouth agape in sheer disbelief. She could see its true form—the evil presence that had been terrorizing the construction plot, and harm anyone who dared to demolish its bridge. It hovered like an opaque, ghostly double-image over the crouching Atsushi, with a malevolent aura that tethered strongly against her own.

She staggered a step backwards. It was _him_ , that mysterious, formidable figure from her obscure days as a time-travelling _miko_. Her eyes travelled frantically she tried to process the vague details on his face. Crescent moon, cold eyes of gold, thin cruel lips. She could instantly recognize him in a crowd. In turn came a train of blurred images of their allied encounters in a fantastical, dream-like battle--a dizzy vortex of spilled blood and clashing swords, all centred amidst a lone, shimmering pearl.

 _It's impossible._ Her mind held back. _Did he die and somehow became a vengeful spirit?_

Kagome instinctively grabbed a holy arrow from her back, except there was no arrow, and she faltered in the realization of the present. Her lips trembled as she dared to utter his name.

"Sesshoumaru."

Atsushi's head shot up, an indiscernible expression on his face, somewhere between confusion and pain.

"You probably don't remember who I am," Kagome whispered, "but you need to stop this. Please, stop hurting the workers because it's not their fault."

 _"Destroy the bridge,"_ Sesshoumaru and Atsushi growled in one voice. " _And I will destroy you."_

Jyohaku deftly stirred into action. He whipped out a talisman, chanted a quick mantra and shot it towards Atsushi's face. Atsushi evaded with lightning speed, then burst into a roar as he pounced on him on all fours. He wiped the priest cold on the ground in an instant. Then he turned to the lone _miko_ behind, his eyes shining a beastly yellow.

Kagome grabbed the _harai-gushi_ that had fell from Jyohaku's hand, and took a handful of salt from his pocket. She cast a glance towards his body, her lips pursed in regret.

"You obviously don't respond to kind words," she spoke coldly, her temerity rising in her chest. "Listen, now! I'm giving you a choice. Evacuate the young man's body, or I will be forced to exorcise and vanquish your spirit!"

The demon supplied with another defiant roar, and a hasty, almost clumsy attempt to paw at her body. Kagome leapt a step backwards, her hand gripping the wand even tighter. A drop of sweat trickled past her temple. She wiped it off with a brush of her arm, gasping. Fighting with demons was no longer in her stride.

She pointed the _harai-gushi_ towards his head.

"I see you're still stubborn as ever, Sesshoumaru. You've spoiled your chances now, and I won't allow you to occupy my friend a second longer!"

She dashed towards him with an anguished cry. The salt threw over his inhuman eyes.

 _I'm sorry, Atsushi, but this is going to hurt badly for you. Please forgive me!_

Jyohaku jerked back in consciousness. He saw that he was still in the forest clearing, although his surroundings had grown darker. He groaned as he moved. He lifted his head, then watched in paralyzed horror.

His apprentice. She was burning, her lithe body aflame with a dazzling soft light, hued with warm pink. Her long hair waved afloat, her small face beholding a gentle calmness. He had never seen such a smile, the one shaped on her lips to convey a kind of compassion, a merciful kindness. No, not burning. She was _radiating_. He could not even move to shield his eyes from the bright vision.

Was this…the all-consuming glow of _reiki_ that had awed and intrigued his old man that day? The power of a true _miko_ , like that from an old era that had ceased to exist. He was witnessing it now, basking in her light. Higurashi Kagome. A wilful, and occasionally bad-tempered shrine maiden. The young lady in his father's tales. She had finally revealed herself to him.

Her body spun, and then she landed with a heavy whip of his _harai-gushi_ on Atsushi's body, the fraying paper streamers hitting with a resounding _twack_. Atsushi yelled in his own voice as his body doubled over in pain. She whipped him again with unrelenting speed fueled by a frightening power. The boy had crouched himself into a foetal position on the ground, his ear-piercing screams rewarding her every lash.

Jyohaku snapped from his reverie. The smile on her lips had disappeared, as did Bodhisattva's benevolence that was seemingly bestowed upon her mere moments ago. How long exactly had she been exorcising the boy?

"You will heed my words!" Her voice, turned cold, commanded. A spark of lightning crackled at the end of the wand, ripping through cloth. An unfamiliar glimmer washed in her eyes. "You _will_ release him and leave this place!"

"Higurashi!" Jyohaku shouted. His legs finally kicked, and he ran to his apprentice, pulling her away. "Stop! You are going to kill Atsushi!"

She resisted against him with uncanny strength. "Jyohaku-sama!" Kagome suddenly lashed him a glare. "Get me a vessel, and fill it with the soil under the bridge! Now!"

The priest regarded her with confusion at first, then left on hurried steps. Kagome bent down and shook the semi-conscious Atsushi's shoulders, knowing the creature inside him could hear her clearly.

"Listen, Sesshoumaru! I'm going to exorcise and obliterate the devil out of you if you continue this!"

 _"Enough…"_ Sesshoumaru's voice rasped from his lips. Kagome saw a dark instant of his face, felt the undulating waves of his fragile aura trying to reach towards hers, like the tendrils of a creeping plant. He was weak, and wholly defeated from the exorcism. After all he was naught but a mere spirit now, and not the _daiyoukai_ that once intrigued her young self. The Sesshoumaru that withstood in her memories was not like this; he was omnipotent and obstinate, and he would not succumb to a mere _miko_.

Why? Why did they have to meet again under such circumstances?

Her cheeks were suddenly wet, and she wiped her tears off.

"Sesshoumaru, tell me, what holds you to that bridge?"

 _"If you wish to vanquish this spirit, then now is an opportune moment."_

"Do you want to be free?" she softly asked him. She saw in the ambiguous haze, as his eyes slowly swept to her face, like faint beacons. "I can release you from your torment that attaches you to this place. I can purify the darkness that festers in your soul. You'll be a brand-new person. But in return… In return, you must follow me."

An uncertain frown pinched between his brows, but he was almost fading now into the orange pools of the setting sun. He did not own much strength to begin with. She had obliterated almost all of it with her power.

 _"You wish…for this Sesshoumaru's spirit to be bound to you?"_

She smiled at him. "Don't use such a solemn word. Think of it like… Like I'm tying a small red string around your finger, and mine."

 _"Then… Binded?"_

She pouted her mouth. "Something like that." And then she leaned forward to him, whispering as if imparting a small secret. "I can give you a new body too if you want. Not like this guy. This guy is a scaredy-cat. How about that?"

A slow breath seeped from him. _"I have died before. A second death is nothing to me."_

Kagome stared at the bridge ahead, darkening into a shapeless mass in the evening. She remembered the tumult of emotions she had felt when she first stepped there. Emotions that harboured within Sesshoumaru himself.

 _What exactly did you go through, Sesshoumaru, to transpire like this?_

"Quick! You don't have much time left! Answer me!"

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes. Nothing. He had nothing to lose. Not even his honour and pride that he had upheld for so long, and in the end only served to betray himself. To live through the centuries as a ghost. Time and purpose had become a hollow concept. As hollow as the gaping hole on his body that had promised upon his demise. Of course, the reason why he had adhered to this place was another matter, but that too, was a never-ending curse he had bequeathed.

Even in death there was something to constantly seek, never content, never satisfied, always searching. Always waiting.

Was it possible to say, that he was weary after all, after everything?

He could feel the warmth of her aura enveloping him, pulling him away from the bleak confines of his being. It did not seem like a bad place. Perhaps she was Death after all. The real Death, and not the one who had viciously ripped his soul out from his throat.

 _"Do with me what you will."_

Kagome smiled, as she cradled Atsushi's body into her arms. "Everything will be alright," she then whispered into his ear.

The priest appeared behind her. In his hand was an urn he had collected from the collapsed rubble.

She took the urn, and his lips pursed into a grim line.

"I do not understand why you're doing this. But Higurashi, that thing. That thing is dangerous."

Kagome almost laughed. She looked up and sent him a mischievous grin, her demeanour worlds apart from the furious, nearly _senseless_ priestess who almost killed her friend just moments ago.

"That's what you say, but you still followed my directions."

"That's because—"

She put up a hand. "Oh shush. Whatever happens will fully be under my responsibility now. You just gotta turn back and don't look at what I'm about to do. Then you can't say that you witnessed your apprentice commit an act of heresy, can you?" Seeing his incredulous face, Kagome started to laugh.

"Oh Jyohaku-sama. If you think he's dangerous now, you should have seen him five hundred years ago."

Jyohaku glared at her, and turned back. Inari Ōkami was probably going to curse him a thousand-fold for allowing this to happen. He shook his head with disappointment not just for her, but for himself. The priest route was really not cut out for him.

The priest did not see, but Sesshoumaru did. In his own quiet, withering state, his spirit watched as Kagome straightened herself on the grass, seated in an upright meditative pose. Her hands clasped together in a prayer as her lips moved in a chant, her figure slowly bathing in the dying glow of the sun.

To whom was she beseeching to, and what exactly, he did not know. He only knew the warmth of her aura, further infusing into him. He sealed her face into his memory. Seal her face, like he had sealed Rin's.

When he opened his eyes an eternity later, he was staring at a white ceiling, naked, and the room smelled like a pig-sty.

 _Approximately a year later…_

 _"Sesshoumaruuuuuuuu!_ Get in here, right _nowwwwww_!

She was screaming. Again. Sesshoumaru shook his head slowly to the sides as though a pool of water had collected in his ears, and he was trying to drain them out. It was such an ugly sound. Especially when one was absorbed in an especially riveting episode of Living with the Kardashians, Episode 3, Season 11.

"What the hell is that?!" Kagome sputtered, pointing to the mangled heap of metal at the backyard where he finally joined her. Then she sent him a flabbergasted look. "Why…why are you eating my Calbee prawn crackers? Are you that hungry?" She slapped her cheek. "No! My bicycle! What did you do to my bicycle?!"

He munched through said crackers. "I attempted to mount it. However it proved to be unco-operative. So I disposed of it."

"That's not for you to decide!" she further screamed. "How am I supposed to go to work tomorrow?!" Kagome flailed her arms around, seemingly entering a state of emotional meltdown. Sesshoumaru blinked with indifference and returned to the couch.

She clasped her hands to her head and sunk slowly to her knees.

 _I shouldn't have brought him here._

She stared at her warped bicycle, twisted so badly beyond recognition that no amount of repair could salvage it. Funny, but she could somewhat remember this wasn't the first time it happened. A bad case of déjà vu overcame her.

 _This is all…a horrendous mistake!_

To be continued…

 **[A/N: I honestly can't believe I finally got this chapter out! It was longer than I expected. This was supposed to be the 2nd chapter! Wahahahahah! Anyways you must have realized the dark flavour for this latest offering—I had very much intended it to be that sombre. Everyone's inner monologues was just running around and we're having insights to everyone's pasts and motivations. I also made some references to previous chapters; I'm guessing it reads differently now.**

 **I also left some ambiguous hints on Sesshoumaru's past, hehe. A little bit goes a long way. Anyhoo because I'm so glad this chapter is done, I'm being generous by rewarding y'all with another update! Two chapters in one go! Hoohoo! Reviews always make my day, and feel free to ask me anything. ;)**

 **Lucy out.**


	10. Arc 2: Assimilation of the Human Culture

A/N: Heyyyy. Welcome to the second arc! Yessss this is turning into a slow-burn romance that is killing even the author… Here Kagome realizes everyone around her is slowly, but surely, changing. Things are happening too fast, esp Sesshoumaru's evolution! XD

 **Assimilation of the Human Culture**

Kagome placed her items at the cashier. A bag of rice, a carton of milk, a bottle of mirin sauce, and a packet of _edamame_ beans. The essentials. She fingered a box of Pocky at a nearby rack. She hemmed and hawed for a while, then went ahead with two boxes. She wasn't living by herself anymore, after all.

She smiled at the young man ringing up the items at the register. "You're alone, Ichiro-kun. Let me guess, Asano's on leave again?"

Ichiro smirked. "You've been coming here now long enough to know Asano's patterns. I bet you don't even remember what the guy looks like, do ya?"

Kagome laughed, until she caught a glint of his shiny nametag. Her hand covered her open mouth. "Oh my god, you've been promoted."

Immediately Ichiro stuck his arms to his sides and stood ram-rod straight, chin up. "Manager Kirihata Ichiro at your service, madam!" he said proudly, earning a giggle from Kagome. Then his posture relaxed. "I worked really hard just so I could say that, y'know."

"You're a meticulous and hard worker, Ichiro-kun. You deserve it! Congratulations!" Kagome then scratched her chin as he continued to pack her groceries. "Say, how long have you been working here, anyway?"

Ichiro hummed as he wondered aloud, licking the set of pierced rings on the bottom left of his lip. It was a habit he had whenever he was thinking, Kagome had noticed. Ichiro was probably the kind of guy mothers would warn their daughters to stay away from. Not Kagome. She had never been one to judge books by their unreliable covers. Besides she couldn't help it—aside from the fact that Ichiro looked like a poster child for "visual kei" (bleached cornrows, lip and brow piercings, plucked eyebrows), he was actually a pretty down-to-earth guy.

"Hmm. Around three years ago, give or take. Shortly before you moved into the neighbourhood, Kagome-sama."

He glanced up to her. Three years ago. Wow, that was long as hell. It felt only like yesterday when the store-door bell had chimed that incessant tune— _ting a ling a ling!—_ and a young lady had stepped inside whilst he was arranging the egg cartons. It was the first time anyone dressed in traditional _miko_ garb had entered the store. He remembered it was a summer's day, because her red _hakama_ was billowing from the summer breeze. Needless to say an egg carton slipped and fell to the floor, and she had cried, running to help. Suddenly, like a dream, their fingers were mingling together in the runny yolk on the floor of the Family Mart store. With a painful twist in his chest, he realized it wasn't just the eggs that had fell.

How ironic, of all people. He probably looked like the devil beside her.

"Kagome-sama," he said, trying to adopt a casual tone, taking his own sweet time to place her peas in the plastic bag, "The guy that sometimes comes with you when you do your shopping here. Is he your boyfriend?"

Her lips pursed into a tight line, and he immediately regretted his words. _Ichiro, you're an idiot, aren't you_ , she was probably thinking—"I-I'm sorry if I made you mad with my question. I'm not trying to pry or anything, really—"

Kagome shook her head kindly. "It's alright, I'm not mad. You're not the first person to ask, you know. The old aunties in the residents' committee especially are always fishing information about him. It's a small town, after all. In fact I'm perplexed that you hadn't asked sooner."

Kagome clapped her hands together and sucked in her breath. "Alright, so here's the scoop!

"No.1 he's not a foreigner, or a mixed-blood.

"No.2 He's not that scary—you _can_ talk to him. I promise you he won't bite.

"No.3 Those long glossy tresses are the real deal! Please refrain yourself from patting!"

Ichiro frowned. That was a smorgasbord of information to take in. Does she tell that to everyone who enquires about him? "So what does he do, cosplay for a living? Like, Sailor Moon?"

She smiled, shrugging. "That's what everyone wants to believe."

He accepted her cash and handed the change thoughtfully. "So…is he's your boyfriend?"

Kagome lifted her bags away, giggling as she shook her head. "Well I guess you can say he is a _friend_ ," she said. "Although I have no idea what the guy is thinking sometimes. He never shares anything with me, you know. Even though we've been living together for a year now…"

Ichiro slammed the counter. "Wait, you're living together?!"

* * *

 _I used to be mad whenever I pass by the park._

Kagome smiled to herself as she took small, but purposeful strides into the park. It was part of the journey home from the Family Mart, around two minutes of walking from her house.

 _Especially in the evening, when it's filled with blissful lovers._

As usual the park was slightly crowded, with people passing through after work. It was a popular place for couples as well, the strategically-placed benches offering a suggestion of privacy among the tall pawlonia trees.

The bags in her hands were starting to get heavy, but she could take it. She was going to reach home soon anyway.

 _It doesn't bother me much now, though. Maybe, it's because I don't feel as lonely anymore_.

" _Gaikoku no miko_ ," called a voice from behind.

Kagome turned her head and saw him at the corner of her eye. He was wearing a Christmas knitted sweater they got from a flea market. She squinted her eyes.

Fancy meeting _him_ here.

"Hey," she said. "It's been a long while, you _need_ to stop calling me tha—"

She stumbled when she caught his full figure, and tripped over her own foot. He caught her back right away before she could fall on the pathway. A few passer-bys in the park delivered them strange glances.

"Sesshoumaru!" she exclaimed, her eyes round with shock as they darted across his face. "What happened to your _hair_?"

Gosh. It wasn't the fact that they had bumped into the park after her work—she was now, after all, tame with the idea of him gallivanting out from the house on his own (provided he dressed decently and _run_ should he encounter suspicious men in dark-blue)—but the simple, lone fact that he had done something to himself.

His long shimmering tresses of silk. They felt soft and fine, precious to the touch. She knew this because she would secretly allow them to slip through her fingers each time he fell into an occasional deep sleep. They were gone now. Reduced to a shorter version, which, as she further scrutinized, realized it reflected a modern layered haircut. Immediately she was placed in an instant state of denial over his new image. His hair still touched his shoulders, but...

"I just returned from the hairdresser's," Sesshoumaru proclaimed, as he continued to walk alongside her. As though going to the hair salon was something to be proud of.

"But...why?"

"Is there a concern?"

"I thought you might have some sort of attachment to it, at least. You had it with you your whole life, didn't you?"

"Yes. But It has no longer served me a purpose. Besides, the hairdresser said it is the current trend. And this Sesshoumaru needs to be well-informed."

 _The hairdresser just wants your money_ , she wanted to tell him glumly.

Then she pondered over his words. She had no idea what original purpose his long hair may initially had. But to just chop them off like that… Kagome would kill anyone who dared alter her hairstyle. Turns out Sesshoumaru was heartless even to himself.

Sesshoumaru then gestured his hand towards her supermarket bags, and she imparted half of them to him. His fingers brushed against hers as she did so. She momentarily stilled, waiting for him to jump, but he did not notice.

They continued to walk through the park in silence.

"Those RC aunties are going to have a field day talking about your new look," Kagome muttered despondently. "Are you trying to pick on girls now?"

Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes and lifted his chin. "To know your enemy, be your enemy," he stated. Kagome quirked an eyebrow. "Sun Tzu."

"…Enemy?"

"Once I have fully assimilated myself within the human culture, this Sesshoumaru will embark on his conquest for world domination."

"Sheesh, I remember distinctly someone said he would never blend himself among humans."

"I remember no such thing."

"Yes, you forget when it's convenient, don't you? Anyway, it's just a haircut. You still have a long way."

Kagome then stole a peek. _Well not just a haircut, actually. I admit he really looks different now._ Sesshoumaru's jawline seemed more pronounced, lending his face a more masculine effect. The androgynous quality of his features still retained however. He was still undeniably beautiful to her.

Maybe even more.

She frowned to herself, hashing her own thoughts. She bit her lip, considering him again.

Was it disturbing to admit he looked a wee attractive now? His looks had always been admirable, but it had never spoken to her on a deeper level. Now, now she was viewing him from a different lens. In which he was reflected no more of the _daiyoukai_ from her past, but instead a new man in her present.

Or...just maybe it was just the angle from where she was standing. That had to be it.

"There is world domination," Sesshoumaru spoke, "and then there is that."

"Sorry?"

"I believe this is the first time you are walking by my side with your head held high."

Kagome stopped, growing hot over what he was implying.

"Take that back! I was never embarrassed to walk with you! Okay maybe when we pass the RC block…"

She blew out her breath as she continued her pace. The women walking by were dishing out second, even third glances to Sesshoumaru. It wasn't the usual frightened-out-of-their-skin look either.

"Look at all the girls ogling at you now. They must think you're some kind of model."

"A model."

"Yeah," Kagome said, grinning over the unlikeliness. "You probably make a good one."

She then sighed as she watched the darkening, dusky-blue sky, the birds cawing their way home. "Hmm... I know this sounds pretty sudden. But I'm kinda craving for a butterscotch sundae right now. With caramel bits and a big pretzel on top."

He nodded agreeably. "I know what your strange cravings signify. That time of the month is coming."

She hit his back with a plastic bag when she understood his meaning. "You pervert!"

Sesshoumaru remained passive as he looked up above, then held up his palm. A wet drop pelted his cheek softly. "It's drizzling," he said. "Let us hurry home."

* * *

 _It's distressing, really,_ Kagome wrote in her diary after they had reached home and she had taken a shower. The melancholic scent and sounds of the passing rain gently filtered into her room.

 _Over the past year he has learnt so many things about me. My turbulent mood swings, my occasional pet peeves. (Like the sound of a fingernail scratching against the tatami mat. He still does this occasionally to annoy me.)_

 _How I like my steak done, how I like the windows slightly ajar when it's drizzling. Even my monthly cycle, which he has shamelessly mentioned._

 _And yet... And yet if you were to ask me one thing about him that I've learnt, aside that he does the chores perfectly and watches too much TV, is that…there is nothing._

 _I know nothing about this person whom I've invited into my home, and ultimately into my life._

Sesshoumaru walked to the living room. He saw that Kagome was already huddled at the couch, hugging a cushion pillow whilst eating from a box of Pocky.

"Hey, they're showing my all-time favorite movie," she was saying, without moving her eyes from the screen. He sank into the couch beside her.

"And that is?"

"Shrek!" Kagome exclaimed. "The first one. The others are okay, but the first one will always be the best for me."

 _I don't know what his motives are, or what are his plans for the future. Although I do hope his world conquest talks are but only a joke._

She saw the way his eyes were studying her Pocky with quiet interest. She waved the box at him. "You want some?" He nodded, and she allowed him to take a stick. "So are you completely assimilated with our food culture yet, Sesshoumaru?"

The biscuit stick crunched between his sharp teeth. "This Sesshoumaru is making significant progress."

Kagome smiled. "Okay, next time I'll try to be the one to whip something up for you. Maybe something exotic. Like Middle Eastern food. Like _shawarma_."

" _Shamarwa_ ," he slowly followed after her.

"No, look at my tongue. _Sha-war-ma."_

" _Shamarwa."_

"Oh god, you're doing that on purpose, aren't you?"

 _But somehow, I feel reassured when he's next to me._

 _"What kind of knight_ are _you?" Princess Fiona exclaims in an exasperated manner. Of which Shrek turns from the door to answer in a confident swagger,"One of a kind."_

Kagome laughed, her hair tumbling down her heaving shoulders, even though she had probably watched the scene a million times. And then barely half an hour later, her head had lolled back on the couch, and she was all but fast asleep. Sesshoumaru took the remaining rest of her Pocky to eat until the movie ended.

Then he took her carefully in his arms, and carried her to bed.

 _Reassured, and warm. And I haven't felt like that in a long time._

 _To be continued…_

 **A/N: Nope, still friends. XD And watch out for more Ichiro! I always enjoy writing about my original characters.**


	11. Happily Ever After

**Happily Ever After**

"Morning, Amari-chan!" Kagome greeted as she arrived at the Yukino Shrine. "Today I brought extra food for lunch! There's fried _aburaage_ and _onigiri_ to pass around!"

Amari giggled. "You're so cheery today." Her smile promptly disappeared when she saw the head priest arriving shortly after at the _tori_ gate. She quickly busied herself with raking the dead leaves.

Jyohaku stopped near the steps towards the entrance hall. He placed his shrine sandals onto the floor, beside the pair of Nike running shoes he was wearing.

Kagome gave him a long once-over, not bothering to conceal the almost leery smile on her face. The head priest was decked out in a windbreaker and track pants, both in crisp black.

"Morning ladies," he said.

"Morning! Did you take a jog before coming? It's the second time this week." Kagome's eyes lit up. "Ah! Could it be—you're making a return to the ring?! All hail the return of Onizuka the Terrible!"

"Yes, and who's going to watch over the shrine while I do that? A pair of ditzy girls?"

"Hey, you just called us "ladies" a second ago."

Jyohaku rolled his eyes and stuck his hands in his pockets. "My days of glory are over. Onizuka the Terrible has since died." He sighed. "I miss the active lifestyle. That's all."

Kagome pulled Amari by her shoulders. "Ne Amari-chan, don't you think the priest looks especially _dashing_ in sports attire?"

Amari stared at him, then quivered and shied away.

"I-I don't know."

Jyohaku cocked an eyebrow. "Kirihata, you really need to do something about your flushed skin. It's red everytime I see your face. It's worrying."

"It's—it's red _only_ when you see it," Amari mumbled.

"Wait. Are you possibly…"

He bent forward to squint at the young woman's face. She squealed, and hid herself behind Kagome, grabbing onto her friend's shoulders.

"…allergic to me?" Jyohaku finished.

Amari bolted into the shrine. "I'm sorry, but I think I'll go sort out the books in the archives now!"

Kagome giggled as she watched her friend's antics. "She's adorable, isn't she? Like a soft, fluffy bunny."

"More like a red-faced monkey." Then he turned to Kagome and raised his eyebrows. "Well, what is it?"

Kagome backed from his suspicious look. "What?"

"You've been in a good mood recently. Also, you've gained back a healthier pallor. I remembered you were somewhat pale all these while."

 _Um, that's because Sesshoumaru isn't feeding much like he used to,_ Kagome thought.

"Tell me the truth," Jyohaku spoke, with an aura of dead seriousness. "Did you win the lottery?"

"Jyohaku-sama!"

The priest smoothed the unruly sides of his thick hair and smiled good-naturedly. "You know that good things must be shared. Now be a good apprentice and seek out some lottery numbers from that spirit you're siring, on my behalf."

Kagome sighed aloud. "I swear, you're horrible." And then an equally horrible idea came to her. She clapped her hands gleefully. "Hey. You know Amari-chan invited me to a date next weekend. She's dying to introduce me to her brother. If you come along, it would be a double—"

"No can do. That's something only you youngsters organize," Jyohaku went.

"Oh, stop acting like you're an old man! You're only ten years my senior! No wonder you're still single and living with your Siamese cat!"

"Excuse me! Women used to throw their panties into the ring every time Onizuka the Terrible was performing!"

"That's because they didn't know your crappy personality!" Kagome huffed and turned away. "Fine. No lottery numbers for you."

Jyohaku harrumped and folded his hands tightly. "Stupid apprentice. You're always full of funny ideas, aren't you?"

"That's because I've got an equally stupid priest to serve."

* * *

Kagome stepped out from her bathroom, towelling her hair dry. Her house was flooded with lights and the TV was blaring with another re-telecast of Oshin, but it only took her _now_ to realize.

He was nowhere to be seen. Not since she returned.

"Sesshoumaru?" Kagome whirled. She checked all the rooms, went to the backyard. She was the only person in her house.

She pulled her hair towel off her slowly. Her damp hair unravelled and fell limply against her back, like dead snakes.

It wasn't like it was the first time he was out on his own. She shouldn't feel so worried for him. Right? Although she wished there was a way he could inform her beforehand. Then at least she could tell him nicely to _please_ switch off the television and lights before leaving the house.

Maybe she should write a big passive-aggressive note on the fridge. The same fridge he liked to raid in the dead of the night, now that he had acquired a taste for human food. It seemed like the more he embraced the human way of living, the more he became increasingly unbearable.

Sometimes, just _sometimes_ she missed the Sesshoumaru that would stare at her vacantly during the initial few months. Who would implore silently for his meal with his round eyes. At least he wouldn't consciously go out of his way to annoy her.

Nowadays he almost didn't need to be fed. It had been some weeks since he called for her, that was for sure. Kagome rubbed the edge of her scarred finger.

And the best part? He was still leaving her hanging, what with his cryptic half-answers and unhelpful insights to their past. To everything.

Come on, it had been a year. She was this close to giving up.

She switched off the TV. Her foot kicked something on the floor. It rolled with a shrill sound under the couch, a small, cylinder-shaped object. Kagome bent over, groaning as she tried her darnest to reach it. When she pulled it out, it was coated with an ugly layer of dust.

It was the amulet she had given to Sesshoumaru to wear on his neck. Kagome gasped. It rolled further in her palm. The soil from the urn was still inside.

* * *

 _"Oh God! It's so heavy! It probably…weighs like a ton!"_

 _The taijiya laughed. "Oh stop overreacting. Kagome-chan. My Hiraikotsu probably weighs as much as your heavy backpack."_

Kagome stirred from sleep. She blinked at her dark ceiling. Her mind was strangely lucid, but her alarm clock glowed a green 3:15. She knew she had dreamt of something, but could not for her life, remember.

There were voices outside. Yes, that was the thing that had woken her up. She opened her bedroom door and strode out, feeling for the amulet in her pyjamas' pocket as she did so.

"Who are you talking to?" she asked him. She saw Sesshoumaru's figure leaning against the kitchen counter, a glass of juice in his hand.

 _That's my expensive Hokkaido grape juice!_

"No one," he said.

"I heard two voices."

"Do you see anyone else?"

Kagome took a deep breath. "No." Then she hastily revealed the amulet. It swung from its cord like a pendulum. "This. I want to talk to you about this. How do you go around without it? I thought you needed it."

"Not anymore." He saw the confused look on her face, and continued to sip his juice.

 _He's doing that again. Ugh!_

"Okay," she said, grinding her jaw. "Anyways, would you mind switching off the electrical appliances when there's nobody at home? You're gonna rack up a huge bill. Maybe…maybe you should start thinking about getting a job, huh? Help me with expenses. Reimburse for that bike you wrecked."

Sesshoumaru set his glass aside and folded his arms neatly. "No. I wish to assume the role and responsibilities of a house husband."

 _A what!_ All the colour drained from her face. "You—when did you learn that _word_? That's the most ludicrous thing you've ever said."

"Does it shock you? It shocks me as well that you require me to go out and work."

"That's because you're starting to live here like any other person, and that incurs cost. It wasn't so bad last time, but now I'm starting to feel the pinch..."

 _Wait. I get it_ , Kagome thought. _Sesshoumaru's never worked a day in his life. He used to be a Lord, remember. He probably thinks I'm insulting him._

And the fact that he's technically an unregistered citizen. He can never find a proper job. As long as he's with me, I'll be footing the bills my whole life!

" _Miko_ ," Sesshoumaru said, looking up to address her properly now. "What exactly are your concerns?"

"I'm returning to bed."

" _Miko_."

"I need to work overtime tomorrow. Probably burn my weekends as well. Ah, this is the life I have chosen after all."

Sesshoumaru did not want to follow her. He wanted to stay in the kitchen, open the cabinets and help himself to the candy shelf. But despite her strained countenance, underneath the _miko'_ s emotions were like a raging sea in a storm. Her heart revolted like a bird thrashing in its cage, and its violent reverberations were echoing in his chest.

So it has come to this, he told himself. Why? Why did the _miko_ have to constantly feel so much? They came like a barrage of arrows targeting his hollow self. Emotions that were unfamiliar to him, _human_ emotions. And for some, they lingered on to him like a bad aftertaste.

Sesshoumaru found his feet moving on their own accord. Kagome shut the door in his face. She struggled to compose herself—she was on the verge of exploding, and her body was shaking.

She couldn't take it anymore. She shouted at him through the door.

"I brought you here for a reason, Sesshoumaru! Not because I wanted a _house husband_! Not because I wanted someone to take care of my chores and my meals!" She slided down the door, her fist banging against it. She didn't know where the tears running down her face were coming from. "I don't _want_ you to take care of me. I want... All I want are _answers_..."

"We have been through this conversation countless of times." He knelt from the other side, his voice empty, emotionless. And yet he felt anything but.

"You never tell me anything… Anything that's conclusive. I'm always here waiting like a complete fool."

"Perhaps because you never ask the right questions."

"Stop twisting the fact. You know well what I mean."

There was no sound from him. Kagome wiped her tears. Yes, she was a fool. What was she expecting, after all? It was all wishing thinking. Binding his soul to her, expecting him to adhere to her orders. He was a _demon_ . He was who he was. He would not accede to her, just because. Only when he wanted to.

"And they lived happily ever after," came his voice quietly.

She lifted her head.

"And they lived happily ever after," Sesshoumaru said again. "T'was the ending of your feudal fairytale that you so desperately seek. The _taijiya_ marries the priest, the hero gets his deserving accolades, and the orphan gains a new family."

"But you said… There was a fire in the village."

"Yes. My half-brother assisted to save those trapped underneath the rubble, with his fire-rat robe." A poignant pause came. "And I remember this because Rin… Rin was one of the survivors."

Rin! Yes, there was a little girl who travelled alongside him. So she too, was safe?

"Is this really the truth?" her voice quaked.

He shook his head behind the door. "It is the truth that you need," he answered.

The door creaked open. She stood meekly behind it, and his eyes instantly sought hers; red-rimmed, sunken with tears. _Embarrassed_ . Something in him leapt. Something deep inside, that was as indiscernible as the bond she held over him. He pushed the door and closed it behind him.

The _miko_ was gazing at her feet, hiding her face.

"Supress your aura. Do not retaliate," Sesshoumaru told her. Kagome looked up in slight confusion.

And then suddenly she was flushed against his chest, and his heavy arms surrounded her. Kagome instantly felt tiny. And warm. Sesshoumaru was warm, just like any other human person. Kagome could feel his heartbeat vividly on her skin. It matched hers, like a wild bird inside a cage…

She smiled to herself. Didn't he use to refrain from physical contact? How things have changed. He had her secured in his arms now. She _must_ be dreaming. She hadn't really woken up a while ago.

He held her tighter, seeing that she had not hurt him. The _miko_ 's body was so small, but right against his, somehow. His lips lowered near her ear. "It will be alright."

Her hands reached around him. _That's right._ That was what she told him when she had held him the first time. That everything would be alright.

Kagome closed her eyes. A feeble sigh escaped her. She wanted to believe in him. If she did, would everything really be over? Would the past remained as it should be, undisturbed, its secrets locked in a distant chamber?

Even if…even if a ghost from her past was right before her?

"A happily ever after," Kagome murmured in his embrace. "For everyone, but us."

 _To be continued!_

* * *

 **A/N: YAYYYYY A HUGGG! Wow! Can't believe I have 11 chapters out of this fic. This is the longest I've been for a commitment-phobic writer.**

 **Anyways thought I'll use this opportunity to speak about my original characters, one by one. Let's talk about the head priest of Yukino-jingu, the ever-"charming" Jyohaku.**

 **He is similar in a lot of ways to Kagome. Both have a colourful past they were forced to leave, and both are serving the shrine out of a sense of responsibility. And both are complete hotheads!**  
 **His completely jaded outlook on life explains his older-than-his-age persona. Unlike Kagome, he has firmly shut the door behind him. I didn't want Kagome to get tagged to some ole bald priest, so that's how he came about. (why an ex-wrestler tho)**

 **That's all, for now! :)**


	12. What Happened at Tokyo Aqua Park?

**What Happened at Tokyo Aqua Park?**

' _I betrayed him.'_

 _Rin played with the kanzashi hair pin in her hands, twirling it around with her fingers. It was cast in gold, the ornament shaped like a flower, sparkling with at least three different jewels._

 _She was thirteen now, and pretty enough to win a considerable amount of suitors. But only one was daring enough to catch a good hold on her, and that was Magoichi from the Saika family. And how could she deny him? The Saika clan was a household name in the Edo villages. They were prosperous, influential, and wielded frightening political power. Rin was a nobody. She should be_ _honoured_ _they would want an orphan like her to be part of their family._

 _The hairpin gleamed in the lamplight._

' _I betrayed him and he called me an ingrate. He would never forgive me.'_

" _Rin-chan!" someone called from outside. "The carriage is here to pick you up!"_

 _Rin started and her hand gripped in reflex. Using a comb, she wound her hair up and tight, before slipping the hair pin through. She smoothed her sides of her hair in the mirror, and found herself unable to look in her own eyes. She clasped her hands over her shuddering chest._

" _Please forgive me," she whispered to no one. Then she turned and headed out in the sun and to the carriage, which would bring her to Magoichi and her new life._

* * *

"Are you excited yet?" she was asking him inside the train. "Tokyo Aqua Park, I mean."

Sesshoumaru brushed his palms slowly against the feel of twill on his chinos trousers. The landscape of Tokyo, a congested hodgepodge of tall structures and squat buildings against the backdrop of dusky-blue mountains zoomed past his vision through the windows. The rolling slopes of Mount Fuji were the only things his eyes could recognize.

"I am, as you are."

"It gets really packed on weekends. That's why I took a weekday leave from work." Then her head ducked sheepishly beside him. "You probably don't know what that means."

He glanced at the woman beside him. Kagome was giving him a somewhat crooked smile, as she brushed her hair behind her ear.

"Special arrangements were made for a more comfortable experience. I understand," Sesshoumaru said. "And I thank you for that."

 _He acknowledges it_ , she thought to herself, _and he's appreciative. That's…good._ Then she laughed. "The priest isn't really happy about it though. But shoot him. Ah speaking of which, he wants some lottery numbers. He has this strange notion that you can predict the next windfall."

Sesshoumaru's nose flared slightly. "He's the same one I attacked, isn't he? Do you know who he is? Or at least, _was_?"

"You mean his previous vocation?"

He shook his head. " _Miko_. You're like the sun, where planets revolve around you, and yet you are unaware of their existences. As long as they do not misbehave in this life, no harm will come to them. In this life, let it be decreed that only I…am yours."

He spoke with such an emotionless conviction in his voice, as though it was the one and resolute truth, but it only served to confuse her. Especially his last line that stood out the most.

 _Only I…am yours? Is he talking about how he is binded to me?_

The mood had turned sombre, somewhat. Only seconds ago they were talking about the aqua park. Kagome frowned, as the train pulled to a stop and the station's name was announced in loud speakers. She stood up excitedly, tapping his shoulder. "We're here now. Let's go!"

They came here to see the dolphins after all, and Kagome hadn't seen them in more than a decade. They sat through the dolphin show, of which its attendees were mostly made of eager foreigners taking shade with their umbrellas.

The dolphins' backs glistened under the sun as they leapt out of the water to perform their tricks. The trainers threw them their rewards from a bucket of herrings. Each time the dolphins landed back underwater, crying shrilly, a big splash would drizzle over the audience. Kagome would giggle and clap her hands.

Beside her Sesshoumaru watched through the whole spectacle with a raised eyebrow. It was his first animal show, to say the least.

They visited the other parts of the aquarium park, visiting the different kinds of aquariums that showcased a different habitat. From penguins to turtles, the crowd proved to be a hassle even on a weekday, and Kagome found herself clutching on Sesshoumaru's arm several times. After she apologized to him for the third time, Sesshoumaru sighed and told her that it was alright to hold on to him, lest they would get separated.

They managed to squeeze themselves on a bench, before the impressive viewing gallery of the Ocean Habitat. Enjoying a hushed moment, their eyes soaked in the mesmerizing schools of fishes traversing through the waters slowly, a couple of large Manta rays at the topmost, a lone hammerhead shark at the corner.

Kagome found herself yawning after awhile. She released a long sigh. "I couldn't get a wink last night. You know, you really need to check the roof. I keep hearing footsteps on it. I think we have a raccoon living up there, or something. Been going on for weeks."

Sesshoumaru smirked. "So you've noticed it already."

"The racoon?"

"The _zashiki warashi_."

Kagome felt as if he had splashed a bucket of cold water on her head. A _zashiki warashi?_ Wasn't that a kind of— "You mean a _child youkai!_ In my house?" Sesshoumaru nodded firmly, and she realized then he wasn't trying to pull on her leg. She wished it was the case though. Suddenly all those flashbacks made sense—that blurred little figure at her door, voices in the night. She stared at her clammy hands. For how long had it made her house its home? Sesshoumaru knew about it—spoke to it, even—and yet he had told her nothing.

"You know what they says about those things, Sesshoumaru. It brings fortune to the owner but misfortune will befall if it decides to leave the house. Please don't scare it away."

"On the contrary. I believe she likes me. The _zashiki warashi_ has been lending me strength. Did it occur to you that I have become much stronger?"

Kagome nodded glumly. "Yes, you don't feed as regularly and you don't need the amulet anymore. Sometimes I wonder if…"

Suddenly Sesshoumaru stood up. "The human traffic is increasing. We should head to a less disruptive place."

They walked off, and ended at a dark, quiet section displaying different species of jellyfish. The tanks were equipped with a colourful lighting effect that would change every minute or so. Before them was a lone Portuguese man-of-war, its long, deadly tentacles trailing underneath it. Ethereal and diaphanous, it floated and bobbed slowly, its luminescent body glowing in gradient colours.

He turned back to her. "You were saying?"

Kagome rubbed her arm self-consciously. "I just thought that when the times comes, you might leave one day, when you no longer need me. Of course, that has always been at the back of your mind, hasn't it?"

"You fool." There was a spike of anger in Sesshoumaru's voice, that surprised even her. "Why do you seem unaware of the implications of the binding ritual? The terms are not that simple." He grinded his jaw, his eyes hard-set on the glass display. "What did you sacrifice for me to be here?" She opened her mouth but he cut her. "I am not talking about those bones in the backyard. That was for my body. In exchange for my soul, what did you give up?"

Kagome peered down, biting on her lip. She should worry, shouldn't she? After all she knew what she was getting into when she decided all this. And yet not even a sliver of fear wormed itself to her. She laughed weakly, scratching her cheek.

"I will eventually pay for it dearly one day, won't I? A soul for a soul."

Sesshoumaru then relapsed into another one of his silences. Kagome sighed. This was not what she had imagined when she planned to come here. She wanted the both of them to take a break, and enjoy themselves. Not engaged in this…depressing, sobering talk.

"Show me your right hand."

Kagome looked at him, perplexed. Nevertheless she raised her hand to him. He held it gently, then traced the line of scars along her finger.

"Has it been that long?" His eyes were casting an eerie light in the dim area. "Do you… _yearn_ to feed me?"

She didn't stop him when he pulled her behind a column, away from the main pathway. The small space was enough for just the both of them. Her body was braced flat against the side of the jellyfish tank, an arm gripped tightly.

He traced her finger along his bottom lip, before trailing lower, the tip of his fangs grazing her. His eyes never left hers, never blinked.

"Your pulse is quickening," Sesshoumaru observed in a quiet voice. "I sense…sheer anticipation, and…" Her hand was quivering in his. His lips brushed her skin, and Kagome shut her eyes tightly. "It seems like your skin is sensitive here. It's causing an interesting blend of reactions. It makes you…blush."

Her other hand pawed at his chest feebly. "Sesshoumaru. Don't…don't say such things."

"What else makes you blush, _miko_? I wish to learn all there is about you." His voice descended to a low whisper, so hoarse even he could not recognize it. " _Higurashi Kagome_. I wish to learn… _everything!_ "

His teeth sank into her skin. Kagome released a strangled cry. The gradient lights from the tank were softly illuminating the features on his face, as his lips gently drew blood from her pulse. Orange-red, then slowly, indigo-purple. Kagome froze, her breath slowly leaving her throat. His face, along with the dancing fire in his bright eyes, would forever burn in her memories.

 _Sesshoumaru… When... When did your eyes become so entrancing? I can't… I can't look away…_

* * *

She placed the slip of paper on his wooden desk. "Your lottery numbers," Kagome said.

Jyohaku steepled his hands across his face and frowned heavily at her. The _miko_ had dark rings on her eyes, and she looked like she had skipped combing her hair that morning.

"Did something happened to you? Or how should I rephrase it—did something happened at Tokyo Aqua Park?"

Her lips pulled at the corners, before she looked up to match his penetrating gaze. "You got your numbers, Jyohaku-sama. Now you have to keep your end of the deal this weekend."

The priest's eyebrows lowered. "Get out of my office."

Kagome was laughing as she exited her way out. Amari was just on her way to his office, carrying a stack of heavy, yellow-paged tomes. She stopped to look at Kagome's retreating back for a few good seconds, before her eyes shifted slowly to the door.

She wondered what was so funny.

 _ **To be continued!**_

 **A/N: Woo-hoo, a new progress in their relationship! *dances a jig* Let's turn on the sexual tension up a notch! While still keeping the rating to T! Hahahaha. So following last chapters' footnote, I will continue to throw meaningless trivia on my OCs. This time it's Amari's turn!**

 **Amari Kirihata, while she does play the fluffy adorable rabbit, can really pack a punch if she needs to. I'm guessing she's the kind of girl who's actually a closet psycho? Nah? Just kidding? I thought she would make a good companion to her spunky** _ **miko**_ **senior. Also, if it isn't already obvious enough from the first chapter, she has a weird crush on the priest. Ah, I can't wait to write the double date chapter!**


	13. The Good Husband

**The Good Husband**

Kagome tottered into the kitchen with her loose pajamas, sniffling. She had taken a brisk evening shower after work, and her hair was matted in a disheveled, damp knot.

"Have you seen my pills?" Sesshoumaru heard her call out in a cranky voice. "I put them in the fridge somewhere."

He shifted his attention from the television. "Do you mean _medicine_? I placed them in a kit."

"Could you get them for me and a glass of water, please? I think I'm coming down with a fever."

She reached under her blanket and laid down miserably, feeling hot on her skin, but cold in her bones. Her nerves, along with her mood, was grating on her too. She placed her hand over her forehead and groaned.

"This just sucks," she muttered. "It's the weekend already. Now I'm not sure if I can meet Amari and the others tomorrow."

Sesshoumaru entered her room after a long while. She lifted her head groggily. She could taste sand in her throat.

He came in with a tray that held her medicine, a glass of water and a bowl of food, and he placed it on the floor beside the _futon_. Kagome observed with a furtive eye as his robe shifted when he sat down, one leg propped up.

"You have been working hard for the both of us," Sesshoumaru said. "So it is my duty now to take care of you." He read the labels on her pill packaging. "It says here you need to take your medicine after your meal. So I've prepared some simple porridge."

Kagome rose in bed, scratching her head sheepishly. "Geez, you really play the role of a house husband very well, don't you?"

Sesshoumaru peered up, a small smile growing on his face. "It is a simple role to play...when nobody is watching."

 _God, everything he gives one of those smiles I just die a little inside._

She wasn't really that sick, yet. But he was already treating her like she was living her last days on earth as a terminally-ill patient. She allowed him to spoon-feed her the porridge, silently wondering when was the last time anyone ever pampered her like that. Probably back when she was still living at her mom's house.

"Stay still," Sesshoumaru suddenly said. Kagome did so, and he leaned forward to lick a drop of porridge dripping at the edge of her lips.

Immediately Kagome reeled back as if she had been zapped by a live wire.

"W-What was that for?!"

"I hate food wastage," Sesshoumaru answered matter-of-factly.

Kagome groaned inwardly. Should she even try to explain? Even a five-year-old would know better. "You can't...do things like that, Sesshoumaru."

"Why not?"

She looked away, biting her lip. "It might...lead to other things."

"Such as?"

She smacked her pillow. "Gosh. You've watched loads of movies to know what I'm talking about. Maybe it doesn't affect you, but I'm only human."

"I do not understand," he replied in his usual, unaffected tone.

Kagome sighed and hugged her pillow. "Never mind."

"I do not understand how it can lead to the worst." Sesshoumaru held her chin gently and lifted her face. He leaned in. "Your soul is already entwined with mine. What fate can be worser than that?"

Kagome felt her face growing hot. The idiot! Having no sense of one's personal space! Did he have any idea how his actions were affecting her? She was a regular young woman, after all.

A click of tongue escaped him, then a rush of breath. " _Miko_ , are you aware that when you blush, you exude a heady, intoxicating scent?" Kagome quaked a little. She recognized this voice. It was the same one he used at the aqua park, when he had drew blood from her skin. That had been a heated, and painfully intense moment. Suddenly he pushed her onto the _futon_ , and before she could make sense of everything, his body dangerously hovered over hers, her wrists locked down.

A quiet growl emitted from his throat. Even in the dim room, the sharp tips of his teeth were gleaming into view, his eyes growing brighter. His face dipped down, closer. "It compels to my inner beast. Did I not tell you I want to learn everything... about you?"

At last Kagome summoned what strength she had, and kicked him hard in the shin. "Stop that!" she yelled. "I'm not some kind of guinea pig for you to test your curiosity on!"

Sesshoumaru released her and sat back. He frowned. " _Miko_ , you...entice me. In ways that even this Sesshoumaru cannot comprehend."

Kagome rubbed her wrists, scowling. "That's your fault for being so close to me!"

"Hn. So it is my fault now, is it?"

He collected her tray and stood, his face grim. "H-hey," Kagome said, but he strode out of her room without another word.

Kagome landed her head back into her pillow.

For God's sake, she thought. She was going to be even sicker than possible.

 _Idiot! Always acting clueless about everything, when he knows exactly what's going on! I swear, he's just twisting me around his little finger! I should start setting some house rules. Like, maintain a distance of five feet from me at least, at all times!_

"Did you fight with your housemate?" Amari enquired innocently as they trimmed the camellia bushes in the garden.

Kagome snapped her cutters a little harder. "Why do you think that way?"

"Because it's the only reason for you to go to work in such an angry mood."

"Who's angry?" she said, pruning the leaves at a dangerous speed. "I'm having my usual daily rant, that's all! Plus I'm having the sniffles! That said, he's really annoying at times! Now he's giving me a cold shoulder since morning ever though it's clearly _his_ fault that last night happened!"

Amari gulped. "O-okay. I hope you're looking forward for tonight's dinner then. Hopefully it brings a smile to your face." She clapped her hands together. "Gee, I'm so excited! Finally the both of you get to meet! It was so hard to make my brother agree to it..."

Kagome's eyes bulged. "Huh? Oh god, that's right. I didn't tell him I wasn't coming home for dinner. I've got a double-date."

"H-hold on. It's a double-date?" Amari went. "Who's the fourth person?"

"Higurashi, Kirihata," Jyohaku called, stepping into the garden. "Tonight is still on, isn't it?"

Amari hurled her cutters into the camellia bush. "You invited the head priest along?!"

Kagome placed the menu flat on the table. The place was crowded, busy with spirited chatter, as to be expected on a Friday night. Amari had chosen a popular cafe in the middle of town, apparently the same one she had been to with Sesshoumaru a few months ago. What a bloody coincidence, she thought glumly. As if there is no other place.

Amari's fingers jostled against her phone. Her brother was late-"on the way" as of thirty minutes ago. He was always late for every thing! Maybe he was going to bail out last minute. She'll murder him if that happened.

Jyohaku was seated in front of her. Amari observed the way he was frowning over the main entrées in the menu, filled mostly with Western fare with tongue-twisting names. The priest's hair had received a fresh trim, his wayward, dark tendrils effectively weeded out. He lived alone and yet his coat looked painstakingly ironed. Dry-cleaners maybe? And she could smell light cologne.

She felt her spirit ebb out slightly. Why didn't Kagome-sama tell her _he_ was coming? Maybe she should have chosen a more traditional restaurant, she thought.

"So uh… What's your brother like, Amari-chan?" Kagome asked.

Amari jolted in surprise. "Ah, well, he's an insurance agent. And he has his own apartment, quite close to where you live, Kagome-sama!"

Kagome raised her brows. An insurance agent? Must be a pretty smooth guy, then.

"Sorry, I'm late," someone muttered, walking towards their table. He was tall, hands shoved in a leather motorcycle jacket, a flu mask on his face. He sat at the empty chair beside Amari, in front of Kagome. "Got the sniffles, man. I almost didn't want to go."

He yanked his mask down, licking his lips, particularly at the set of pierced rings. Kagome realized it was really a night of sheer coincidences.

Amari's brother was the Family Mart guy. _"Manager Ichiro Kirihata at your service, madam!"_ he had told her one time. Kirihata, like Amari Kirihata. Darn, she really need to start listening to people properly.

"Eh, Ichiro-kun?" Kagome laughed nervously. "Small world, huh." Ichiro gaped wordlessly at the woman before him, like a deer caught in headlights.

"K-Kagome-sama." He ran a hand over his hair and pointed to his flabbergasted sister. "Amari's colleague. A _miko_. Of course. I should have pieced the puzzle together." He shrugged and started laughing with her. "Small world? More like a small _town_."

Amari stared at her brother, then at Kagome. "You guys know each other?"

"Of course! He works at the convenie-"

Ichiro instantly leaned forward and clamped a hand onto Kagome's mouth. "Don't say it!" he whispered fiercely, "She doesn't know I'm working there!" And then he turned to Amari and laughed. "A client! She's just a client! Isn't that so, Kagome-sama?"

Kagome laughed weakly alongside with Ichiro. Amari is really naive, she thought. There was no way Ichiro was an insurance agent, not with his bleached cornrows and piercings.

Jyohaku narrowed his eyes at the laughing trio, still gripping his menu and feeling the least amused. And what was he, some kind of chaperone for these youngsters tonight? _I'm just here because of the lottery numbers_ , he chanted to himself, _I'm just here because of the lottery numbers..._

"So how old are you, Ichiro-kun?" Kagome asked after some time, when their food had arrived. She stirred her ice-blended mocha. She still couldn't get over the fact that the guy she was seeing almost every week at the Family Mart was the same one Amari had been dying to introduce. And he was having the sniffles too, just like her. The world must work on a strange system of coincidences, one after another.

"Twenty-eight," he said, cutting his sirloin steak. Throughout the whole dinner he hadn't dared to lift his face to look at her. He must be horribly embarrassed. Although she wondered why he had lied about his job in the first place. His family must have placed high expectations on him.

She smiled at him. "Oh really? Then you're three years my senior, and seven years junior of Jyohaku-sama!"

Amari's hands flew over to her mouth. She looked like she was going to have a heart attack. "Huh? The head priest is only 35 years old?"

Jyohaku gripped his cutlery tightly. "How old did you think I was?"

"A priest?" Ichiro sputtered to his sister. "Why the hell is your date a priest? Is there no other guy you're interested in?"

"W-who says I am?!" Amari retorted, beet-root red.

Jyohaku choked over his fish and chips-apparently it was the only thing in the menu he could pronounce. Kagome patted the priest's back empathetically. "So uh, since this is a kind of singles' meet, what kind of women are you into, Jyohaku-sama?"

 _Please say something along the lines of "quiet and shy" or "innocent and bashful"..._

The priest coughed and wiped his mouth with a serviette. He paused and seemed to consider her question deeply. "Well she has to be someone I see as my equal, of course. She needs to be a capable woman, if she is going to help me run the shrine."

Amari's eyes widened. "Does she have to be a _miko_?"

He sipped his cup of coffee. "Well, not necessarily. Although my mother was one herself..."

Suddenly Kagome slammed her hand on the bar, eliciting a jolt from the other three. "No. You _can't_ do that. You can't marry a woman of your equal standing, Jyohaku-sama!"

"Why not, pray tell?"

"Because _I_ want to be your equal. But I don't want to be married to _you_."

Jyohaku's eyebrows shot upwards over his cup. His dumbfounded expression diminished when Kagome's sudden dismay made sense to him, and his cup shook as he placed it down. He broke into a loud, raucous laughter.

"And damn hell if I ever get married to a wife like you! Looks like you'll be an apprentice forever, Higurashi!" Jyohaku wiped his tears. "Oh, my belly hasn't ached from such a good laugh in a while."

Kagome started to weep in mock distress. "I'm stuck in a freaking stalemate now. Inari-okami, help me!"

Amari stared at her trembling hands over her lap. _Why do I feel so horrible?_

Someone patted on Kagome's shoulder while they were queuing at the cashier. Kagome whirled around, surprised to see a familiar face. It was Ayumi, an old friend she had not seen since her wedding.

"Hey Kagome-chan! I haven't seen you in a while!"

"Ayumi-chan! My gosh, how are you?"

Ayumi beamed. "I'm doing good, thank you." Her old friend still looked the same, although slightly weary, with some weight under her chin. Kagome saw a man with a child behind her, and smiled at them. Quickly Ayumi introduced her to her family, while Kagome introduced them to her friends.

She looked over Kagome's shoulder at Ichiro.

"Geez. You guys are like the ultimate high-school sweethearts, huh," Ayumi said, nodding with a smile. "Still together all these years."

"What?" Kagome said, turning to look at Ichiro.

Ayumi fingered her nose and pointed at him. "He's the...guy who disrupted our school musical, isn't he? The shrine-worker dude. Or something."

Kagome laughed nervously. "Ah, I think you got the wrong guy. That is...entirely a different person you're talking about."

Ayumi clasped a hand over her mouth. "Oh really! My bad! Just that, there's a really heavy resemblance. I'm so sorry!"

"It's alright."

Jyohaku rolled his eyes at the back. "What's the plan after this?" he asked Amari.

"Karaoke!" The Kirihata siblings answered in unison, a strange fire alight in their eyes. Jyohaku wished he hadn't asked.

"Do you know the kind of songs you sing reflect the kind of person you are?" Ichiro said to Kagome, as they were poring together over the song catalogue on the small screen. A carton of beer cans was placed on the table, half-opened, along with some snacks.

The dark room shimmered with disco lights. In front of them Amari was slurring over the microphone, as she danced awkwardly in front of the priest.

"I'm comin' at yaaa/'Cause I know you got a baaad reputation/Doesn't matter,'cause you giiive me temptation/And we don't gotta think 'bout nooothin'"

 _She's definitely drunk!_ their thoughts screamed.

It was Ichiro's turn next, as he began wailing in a high pitch. "And wheeen you gooo/Would you even turn to saaa-ay/I don't love youuu, like I loved youuu/Yester-daaaaay!"

 _Why so angsty?!_

The microphone shook in Jyohaku's hand. It was the first time any of them ever heard a priest sing. "It's all ooover nooow/Nothing leeeft to saaay/Just the sooound of the orchestra plaaaayingggg..."

 _Who would dare break the priest's heart?!_

Kagome cleared her throat. Here goes nothing, she thought.

"I must confeeess, that my lonelineeeess is bringing me dooooown/Don't you know I still belieeeeve/That's you will be heeeeereee and give me a siiiiiign/Hit me baby one more-" Someone pressed 'next' on the remote control and Kagome screamed in anguish. "Jyohaku-samaaaa how could youuuu!"

"This night has been more tiring than I expected," Ichiro said outside the karaoke lounge, as he smoked a cigarette over a railing beside the priest. Their singing session had concluded and it was time to go home.

"Agreed. Especially when you have a pair of dead-drunk girls with you," Jyohaku said, smoking on his own stick. Both men shook their heads and sighed, as said girls clung on their backs tightly, on the verge of collapsing.

"Hey, I'm not drunk!" Kagome snapped, slapping the priest's shoulder. She was slightly tipsy maybe, but not drunk.

Ichiro smiled at her, then glanced at his sister doubling over a ditch, retching. He walked ahead with Kagome slowly on the pavement. Both were still shaking their heads in disbelief.

For Ichiro, it was too close to be a coincidence. Was fate playing tricks on him? He could just imagine the gods laughing up above, watching them waltz into their plan. They knew, they knew he was in love with her and they just had to set this up...

He crammed his hands in his pockets. "So uh, your friend that you bumped into just now. She said that I looked familiar?"

"Yeah. Like an old friend."

"An old friend or an old lover?" Ichiro had meant it as a joke of course, but Kagome instantly blushed. He bit his tongue-her flustered face had lowered his guard for a moment, he could hear the gods snickering-and for awhile he wondered if there was some element of truth in his suggestion. She wasn't telling him anything more, though.

He cleared his throat. "Do you want to, you know, exchange numbers? We could meet up again, even though I know we kinda meet regularly at the store but what I mean is-"

Kagome giggled. "It's okay. I'm totally fine with the idea. I've always thought you're a cool guy, Ichiro-kun. A little shy, but still cool. Somehow I'm glad it's you who turned out to be Amari's brother."

Suddenly her smile faded. She stared at something in the distance, and her heart did a double-beat, a feeling akin to panic arresting her. Panic? Why would she be? She wasn't doing anything wrong...

Sesshoumaru was standing some metres up ahead. Even from the distance Kagome could see his stare boring straight into them. One half on his face was cloaked in the nightly shadows, the other half glowing in the blinking neon lights of the drinking establishments lining the pavement. The memory back at the aqua park, of last night, suddenly surged back into her mind, and she shut her eyes.

She clutched her bag closer to her. "Sorry, Ichiro-kun, but I...I gotta go, like right now."

Ichiro frowned up ahead. "That's your housemate, isn't it? Did you tell him to pick you up?"

"Um, yeah. Kinda. Tell Amari-chan and Jyohaku-sama I'm sorry for leaving so soon. I'll call them up tomorrow!"

She ran off. A breeze passed him, leaving behind her fragrance and the echoing of her voice in his ears. Ichiro saw as Sesshoumaru continued to drill his gaze towards him, even though Kagome was already at his side.

A cold shiver suddenly spooked him. It felt as if the strange man wanted him to melt and disintegrate at that very spot.

 _ **Wait for the next chapter!**_

 **Song Credits: -**  
 **Amari: "Side to Side" by Ariana Grande, lyrics written by Martin Sandberg, Onika Tanya Maraj, Alexander Erik Kronlund, Ilya Savan Kotecha, Ariana Grande  
Ichiro: "I Don't Love You" by My Chemical Romance, lyrics written by Ray Toro, Frank Iero, Bob Bryar, Gerard Way, Michael Way  
Jyohaku: "The Last Waltz" by Engelbert Humperdink, lyrics written by Barry Mason, Les Reed  
Kagome: "Hit Me Baby One More Time" by Britney Spears, lyrics written by ****Martin Sandberg**


	14. The Good Wife

**A/N: Before I kickstart this long-delayed chapter, I have something to share. Recently I've been receiving heart-warming reviews for this fic and I feel absolutely enthralled by the response. It really means a lot because I'm always struggling as a writer and I'm always questioning myself if everything is worth it. There have been many times when I feel like throwing in the towel and giving up writing fanfics, especially when I compare myself to other authors. Anyway long story short, I guess even if my audience is a small one I will still keep on pushing for you guys, and because for the simple joy in writing itself. It seems to be the only thing that can keep my sanity intact. *sniffles***

 **Anyhoo! Guess what! If you aren't aware, RannyYunny recently made a fanart for Binded! And it showcases Sesshoumaru in a Hello Kitty Apron. Yay!!! I know you guys are curious as to how Sessh would appear like so... Go check it out here, and go check her other art pieces as well! 3**

 **https/rannyunny./post/173852194660/fanfiction-fanart-binded-by-lucy-morningstar**

 **Okay enough rambling! Please forgive me!**

 **The Good Wife**

"It is...big," Sesshoumaru observed.

Kagome perched her hands on her hips. "And it better be." She walked to the new queen-sized bed that would be the new fixture in her room, and spell an end to her futon-padded nights. She pushed against the mattress, still sealed in plastic, with an appraising hand. "Cost a quarter of my savings."

"Hn. I suppose it fits two." With that last remark, Sesshoumaru turned to leave, attending the boiling _dashi_ stock in the kitchen. She watched his retreating back.

 _Hey,_ she wanted to say, _I wasn't thinking of you at all when I bought it. But now you just had to mention something like that..._

She stared at the bed, and it suddenly represented a different image altogether when she had chanced upon it at the furniture store, and it was far from the wholesome idea of a good sleep.

*

" _Ground control to Major Tom_."

Ichiro's voice was like a bullet, ricocheting off her mind. Kagome blinked, and all of a sudden she remembered she was sitting in a crowded Denny's having dinner on a Thursday night, her date wearing an amused smile of his face.

"What? Ground control?"

Ichiro dipped a french fry in chilli with a somewhat disappointed look. "Space Oddity." Seeing the further confused look on her face, he continued, "David Bowie. Come on. Gee, you're really not on earth, are you?"

Kagome flushed in embarrassment, and toyed with the straw in her chocolate milkshake. "I'm sorry, Ichiro-kun. I, uh…" _I'm really spaced out on a date with a guy, aren't I? No wonder they never call back._ She shook her head to clear her thoughts. "Um, speaking of space, what is your favourite planet?"

"Mars, only 'cause it's named after the Roman god of war." Ichiro waved his hand dismissively. "Forget planets. What do you think of black holes, Kagome-sama?"

Kagome widened her eyes as she sucked through her straw. "What do I think of black holes?"

Ichiro leaned back in his seat, his brown eyes regarding her more seriously now. Kagome had never seen him in that manner—he was always laid-back and shying away from eye contact. As though her answer would either make or break whatever conviction he had placed in her.

"Yes. Do you believe that they can distort time and space? Things like that."

Her eyebrows quirked only for a split-second, but she was sure he had caught it. Kagome poked her fork through her spaghetti carbonara and fed herself. "That's a…pretty deep subject if you're going there. I mean, there are a lot of theories—"

Ichiro cut her. "Actually, I've been following Michio Kaku's works for years now and gone through all of his books, and I honestly believe time-warps and parallel universes are not only possible—they _have_ occurred throughout the history of mankind."

He was jabbing his finger on the table-top for emphasis now, like a school lecturer laying down statistics, and not the fumbling store manager she was used to. Kagome stilled, her large eyes darting across his face. The spaghetti in her mouth had turned cold and soggy, and she didn't feel like swallowing it anymore.

Ichiro blew out his breath, and ran his fingers through his hair. "Gosh, I'm sorry. You must be thinking I'm such a weirdo now. Like who knew the Family Mart guy was into science-fiction crap, right? You've never even heard of Michio Kaku before. My bad. Go ahead and laugh."

"No, Ichiro," Kagome said, shaking her head. "I'm perfectly fine with the subject. "I'm just curious as to why you feel so strongly convinced. A normal person would just think of it as pure garbage."

He smiled tightly at her, then gazed out through the restaurant windows. The skies had turned dark for the night, and it was running pretty late. Sure they weren't teenagers on tight curfews anymore, but Kagome always looked like the type to be rushing home straight after her work. He had asked her out on a short notice, and it had started to become like a habit recently, these impromptu dinners. And it was nice, sometimes, to see out from her usual work clothes. Although he swore, it was as if she was made for the _miko_ garb.

"You know what?" he then said. He slided his motorcycle keys off the table and tossed it into his jacket pocket. "Let's just forget it. I'll send you home in a while. Don't want your _housemate_ to be hounding me for holding you back."

Kagome giggled, as she hastened to finish her food. "Can I ask you a personal question, though?" Ichiro continued, still smiling. Kagome glanced up at him. "I know this isn't the first time I'm asking and I probably don't have the right to, but. Things are totally _platonic_ between you and him, right?"

"Yeah. Totally," Kagome replied, staring at him dead in the eye.

*

"Uh, _tonkotsu ramen_?"

Kagome stared at the steaming bowl on the dining table. On usual evenings she would have scarfed it down without a second nudge, but her stomach was still swimming with the spaghetti and fries and that thick milkshake she just had. She couldn't possibly fit in another bowl of noodles with pork cutlets now, can she?

She peered at Sesshoumaru sitting across her at the table. He had leaned forward, and arranged his hands in a steeple that hid a good portion of his face. She could only see the way his eyes seemed to be scrutinizing her. God, when did he learn to be so…

"Eat," he ordered.

Kagome picked her chopsticks slowly and ducked her head in a docile manner. She managed a flimsy smile at him but his expression didn't change. Sesshoumaru had been awfully cold with her for the past few weeks. As though there was something he was displeased about, and yet refused to share with her. The current situation on hand was not making things any more comfortable for her.

What was it? It couldn't possibly be because she had started seeing Ichiro, right? Kagome knew Sesshoumaru had an unfounded dislike for him, but...

She frowned. It was none of his business with whom she was with.

And with that, Kagome soldiered through her meal even though she was close to throwing up. She would not show him her weakness, nor the slight guilt for having dinner outside without informing him first—which was a pity, really because the delicious full-bodied flavours of the _ramen_ was wasted on her full stomach.

Needless to say she couldn't move after she slurped the last drop of soup, and she landed on her back on the tatami mat, groaning miserably.

Sesshoumaru cleared away her dishes quietly. Kagome was half-crying as she made her way slowly to her new bed. The mattress was as stiff as her belly. She shifted her body to the side when he entered her room.

"Why do you turn your face from me?"

Kagome grinded her jaw, staring frustratedly at the wall before her. "Nothing," she said.

"A good _miko_ does not lie."

She scowled wordlessly. Then she heard the bed creak, felt the imbalance of weight. She hugged her pillow tighter to her chest.

"This will be my first experience on a Western-style bed. It is not to my liking, I'm afraid."

A click of a tongue escaped from her mouth. "Then don't sleep on it," Kagome muttered.

A long silence stretched between them. Finally Sesshoumaru removed himself from the bed's edge, and switched off the lights.

"Have a good rest," she heard before the door closed.

In reply, Kagome covered her face with the pillow, trying to shut his voice out from her ears.

 _To be continued!_


	15. An Element of Surprise

**A/N: Hey guys! Thanks for reading up thus far! Thought of beefing up this chapter since the last one was kinda short. Hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing this. =)**

 **An Element of Surprise**

Amari's slice of beef slipped from her chopsticks, before it plopped back into the bed of rice in her bento box. She gasped.

"You guys haven't been talking for a month?" she exclaimed. "B-b-but you live in the same house and you see each other every day!"

Kagome scoffed. "Yeah right. You'll be surprised of how our daily schedule now conflicts with each other. I wake up in the morning and he's already gone, and when I come home, he'll be seated at the couch watching the TV without another word."

"Where does he go during the day? Isn't he supposed to always stay home as your butler?"

"Well, Sesshoumaru has never been the type to share, and I've never bothered asking. And for the last time, Amari-chan, he isn't my butler."

Amari pouted. As usual the two _miko_ were having their lunch at the garden benches and airing any grievances plaguing the self, which was always aplenty. It had become a daily affair, sitting with their home-cooked meals—they could be giggling over Kagome's dramatic account of a recent incident ("I got drenched to my undergarments in the rain yesterday, did _you_ get wet, Amari-chan?") and the next second their voices would be reduced to discreet whispers, as they indulged in gossip about the head priest ("I heard he was married once, Kagome-sama! Can you believe that?").

For Kagome who now kept minimal contact with her old friends who have since moved on with their lives, she particularly appreciated her moments with Amari, more than the younger miko was aware.

"But despite all that, he still has time to prepare your meals and clean your house! Even when the both are you are fighting." Amari's brown eyes sparkled as she clasped both hands together. "That's _real_ dedication there. Or even love, should I say?"

Kagome chewed her prawn tempura with distaste. Not over the food, but at the mere suggestion of her friend's words.

"That's just _mental_. I doubt he even has actual feelings. Most of the time he's just like an empty shell of a person."

She bit her tongue. That had sounded too harsh, and yet it was too late to retract her words. Sesshoumaru was, in a sense, just a spirit housed in an otherwise provisional body. But it wasn't exactly true was it, that he was just an empty shell? Over time he felt like a normal warm-blooded person living with her, with a mind and intellect of his own. Whether he owned a conscience and a moral compass was still beyond her.

Needless to say his peculiar addiction to TV, and a cleanliness streak that occasionally bordered on an OCD level, were all traits that were somehow personal _and_ human. And if Sesshoumaru was really void of personality as she'd liked to believe, would he enjoy partaking moments of delight over her discomfort, teasing her reaction every now and then? And what about his stalking tendencies? He was definitely growing possessive of her.

Maybe that was it. Maybe the sheer realization that she was sharing her home with someone who was slowing affecting her life, was taking a toll on her. Didn't she use to pride on herself as an independent, self-sufficient person? That was why she had moved away from her hometown to step into her vocation, living alone so she could take care of herself.

Now every time she came home, the dishes would already be done and the floor was spick and span. Her meals were taken care of. Her fingernails, usually long because she had no time to trim them, would suddenly be short in the course of an overnight.

Now it seemed every decision she made, from as little as having to buying an extra Pocky box, to whether she _should_ go out to have dinner with Ichiro again...involved Sesshoumaru.

 _And who am I to complain, honestly?_ Kagome thought glumly. _I'm the one who brought him into my life. I have to be entirely responsible for it. And I'm sure, even though he doesn't speak of it, Sesshoumaru has his own share of troubles as well, adjusting into his new life._ Our _new life._

Was that why she was indirectly always pushing him off? It was all her, wasn't it, creating that rift between them? She was just scared of getting too close to him.

But why?

"Amari-chan," Kagome said suddenly with a spirited lilt in her voice, "Would you mind accompanying me today after work? I'm thinking of buying a mobile phone."

"Eh? But weren't you saving up to buy a new bicycle? You've been walking to work to and fro for months now!"

Kagome smiled wistfully, as she finished her meal, then finished it off with hot tea.

"It's not for me, it's for him. I think it's better this way for us to communicate in each other's absence. All this time I've been pasting passive-aggressive notes on the fridge door, which I'm absolutely sure he enjoys ignoring."

Amari looked on emphatically. "Gee, Kagome-sama. It's like you guys are married."

"Precisely, you echo my sentiments well, Kirihata."

The two miko jolted over the sudden male voice interjecting into their conversation. Kagome rolled her eyes as Amari ducked her head.

"And what did you think, O Great Priest?" Kagome glared over her shoulder. Jyohaku strode into the garden, sinewy arms folded tightly.

"That you looked married."

"Pardon me?"

"I'm talking about your weight gain, you dumb apprentice. Haven't you noticed it already? You have a double chin now. "

"I still can't believe it," Kagome said, pawing under her chin miserably as the pair wandered around the shopping mall. "That the stupid priest said I have a double chin."

Amari merely laughed. "Hey cheer up! You got the new phone, haven't you?"

"Yeah, let's go home now. But first, let's drop by that snack store! I suddenly have a craving for dried seaweed. Did I mention that Sesshoumaru likes them too?"

They entered the snack store. Amari wafted to the magazine section as Kagome chose her snacks with a judicious squint.

"Hey Kagome-sama?"

"Yep?"

"Do you mind coming here for a while? I just want you to look at something."

Kagome walked over to Amari who was clutching a magazine, peering hard at its cover. It looked like a typical magazine for cosplayers, until Kagome leaned in closer.

"He...kinda looks like your butler, doesn't he?" Amari half-laughed at the model splayed on the cover, portrayed as some sort of an otherworldly elfin race. His warrior clothes and intimidating pose while impressive, did nothing to surpass his distinctive face.

Kagome wanted to faint right there in the snack store.

" _What, in everything that is holy and pure, is this?!_ "

The magazine smacked onto the table. Sesshoumaru merely graced it with an indifferent eye from the couch, before his attentions snapped back to the TV. Oshin was on air, and the titular character was being harassed by her employers in a harrowing scene, just as Kagome was yelling. Couldn't the woman wait for a better time, for hell's sake?

"It's out. I see."

"What? What do you mean "it's out"? So you don't deny it—you really _are_ a cosplay model now?" Kagome shrieked.

A slight frown dusted over his eyebrows. "Why are you angry? You said I would make a good model. And my unorthodox looks are perfect for role-playing."

Kagome let out a cry of anguish. "Good for you then! Everything is you do is none of my business!"

Sesshoumaru sighed heavily before he switched off the telly. He stood up and took away the magazine.

"There is something I want to show you," he said. He walked off, heading toward the backyard. Kagome, still reeling, trudged behind him with a scowl on her face.

She stepped into the backyard. At first it was unclear what Sesshoumaru wanted her to see—then it gleamed into view, its metallic body quietly resting against the brick wall.

A brand-new bicycle. Kagome was at a loss for words.

"What does..." she sputtered, "this have to do with anything..." But she knew, she knew what it meant and Sesshoumaru, standing close behind her, knew that _she_ knew.

Slowly, almost trance-like, she tottered to the bicycle, a quivering hand over the handlebar. A solid Shimano mountain bike. It was beyond her frugal dreams.

Sesshoumaru leaned forward, his voice almost careful in her ear. "Are you still angry now?" he simply asked.

A heavy breath drew out from her. "Thanks," she muttered. "I've got...something to give you too."

Kagome rolled over in her bed restlessly. At last she kicked the suffocating covers off her, and sat over the edge, contemplating. With a frustrated sigh, she finally willed herself to leave the room. She marched straight towards the couch in the living room.

It was dark, the lights and telly switched off in the night. Sesshoumaru might have been sleeping, but the light from the mobile phone casting on his face proved otherwise. Suddenly the strength in her legs seemed to have sap off into the tatami flooring, and Kagome stood there rigidly, wondering what on earth was wrong with her, why the hell was she so darn anxious with him suddenly—

"What happened?" Sesshoumaru's voice suddenly appeared. He had sat up on the couch, aware of her presence. He placed the phone aside as she hesitated, trying to find the right words. With the phone away the room fell into a darker place, with just the hint of silhouette on their bodies.

"I uh, was just checking you up. See how you were faring on the new phone."

"I will catch up eventually," he replied matter-of-factly. "I have always been a fast learner, something you are well aware yourself."

"Yes, you are. You're a fast learner."

When she said nothing else, Sesshoumaru shifted in the couch until he made himself comfortable. In the quiet still of the night, he could detect the rapid heartbeat in her chest, and he could smell her apparent nervousness—it was the smell of her perspiration—but unless she told him anything, he wouldn't know what was wrong with her. As much as he wished, he was not telepathic, an ability he wished he had, seeing the _miko_ 's ever perplexing behaviour.

"You should rest," Sesshoumaru told her at last.

"Sesshoumaru," she finally said, her voice like the gentlest of whispers. He tilted his head to her. "I didn't…thank you properly for the bike."

"Take it as a form of reimbursement for the old one I damaged."

"Well, that's that, and another thing is… I'm sorry."

"For?"

Kagome shrugged. A small smile tugged the corner of his lips. The _miko_ didn't even know what she was apologizing for, and yet it made her struggle in discomfort like so.

"You did nothing wrong," he said.

"No," Kagome said, "I mean it. I haven't been really nice to you lately."

"I told you once, and I shall tell you again: I do not care for nice."

"You were… You were obviously offended."

"Offended with what?"

"Because I kept pushing you away."

His eyebrows quirked. _That?_ She thought he was sore over _that?_ Did he appear so petty to her? Any fool would know the real reason he was miffed with her ever since she became involved with the boy, but seeing her overt cluelessness over the situation, he decided _he_ was being silly. With a low sigh, he allowed the matter to rest.

"Stupid _miko_. This Sesshoumaru is incapable of feeling offended." When Kagome opened her mouth to say more, he quickly interrupted her. "Switch on the lights and come here."

Sesshoumaru moved to make space for her, and Kagome sat awkwardly beside him. Her spirits were still down, so he thought about it, about that trick he saw on TV a few days earlier. He snapped his fingers beside her ear and she glanced up and before she knew it, a packet of dried seaweed had appeared in his hand.

Kagome gaped in awe as he tore the packet open and started eating. "My _god_ , how did you— So not only are you a model now, you're a magician too?"

"If it can make you smile, why not? And thank you for this purchase."

A quick burst of laughter engulfed over her, and she slapped his chest, as she shook her head. "Really, Sesshoumaru! I have no more words for you!"

"It's interesting. How an element of surprise can bring a concept of joy. I think," he said, "that is all it matters."

"What matters?"

"That you are content."

Kagome stared at him for a long while until he felt compelled to push her face away. Then she took his hand in hers, and rested her head on his shoulder, breathing deeply, contentedly. It was as if the world had stopped in time when she touched his hand, only to capture the delicate moment of them resting against each other, the sound of their breaths accompanying their private thoughts.

All of it felt so… _right_.

"Ne, Sesshoumaru. I've been thinking of it," Kagome said. "Now that you have a paying job, does this mean you can help me with the bills?"

"Bills?" Sesshoumaru went, genuinely in wonderment. "Is it a kind of biscuit?"

Kagome went back to bed.

 _To be continued!_


	16. The Approaching Heat of Summer

**The Approaching Heat of Summer**

 _Her fists once small like plums, were now akin to persimmons tugging against the stiffened silk of his hakama. She was down on her knees, sobbing, a rugged red cloak covered over her head, and when her tears ran down her ashy cheeks, they drew clean white lines against the soot._

 _Very quickly Sesshoumaru decided he did not like it, did not like the smell of burnt wood, mixed with tears._

 _"Uncle Yasha," Rin was crying. "He's still inside!"_

 _It was a dark night, the moon a mere slice, but the fire had lent the sky a bright, reddish tinge._

 _Sesshoumaru found himself entering the raging orphanage, regrettably. Almost half of the pillars had defeated in the fire, the roof disintegrating by the mere second. A falling wooden beam narrowly missed his shoulder as he walked further in._

 _Inuyasha lay pinned underneath the rubble at a corner, his human face barely peeking out from the shreds of debris. The rest of his body remained trapped, immobile. The fire swarmed around the other parts of the room, ravaging everything into cinders. Bleak eyes staring at the ceiling, he simply appeared like he was waiting for Death. A strange scene, given his tenacious nature._

 _Sesshoumaru presented a chilly smile._

 _"Your face looks more rounded, not since our last meeting," he called to Inuyasha. "Has the village life been feeding you well?"_

 _Inuyasha turned his face only to scoff weakly. "Not you. Spare me the bloody formalities and do it already. "_

 _"Hn," he went, his eyes assessing his surroundings. Any time now, the whole building was going to collapse, and he would not want to be caught in it._

 _"Any other day I would have rejoiced upon this opportunity," Sesshoumaru muttered._

 _He tossed the red cloak that had been in his grip, and it landed near Inuyasha's face._

 _"I believe this belongs to you."_

 _"Don't need it," Inuyasha spoke through clenched teeth, his voice turning hoarse over the fumes. Then he started to cough, horribly, as if there was something in his chest he wanted to claw out, and Sesshoumaru found himself tensing with annoyance._

 _"There are other ways to be foolish, Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru turned to leave._

 _"Hey," his half-brother called out. His usual roguish grin had returned, his sweating face bright with the flames surrounding him. "Do you think she'll remember me, when I see her again?"_

 _On his way back to Rin atop the small hill, where she sat huddled with the other villagers, a deafening crash reached Sesshoumaru's ears as the orphanage finally gave way, crumbling into the ground in a formless, smoking heap._

 _He stood there, almost frozen, watching the black ashes softly float up to the crimson sky, and as much as he tried to, he could not understand._

 _Once more, someone had showed him that he commanded neither Life, nor Death._

* * *

"She's a monster. Like, if the devil sent one of his minions from the fiery depths of hell, and it crawled out from some molten crack in a spewing volcano, she'd probably be it. No, screw that. She is the devil incarnate himself."

Amari wobbled slightly on the ladder, as her arms strained up to hang the paper lantern atop the ceiling. Beneath her Kagome was supposed to keep watch, a hand on a rung, but instead her attentions were diverted to a certain topic, and she had been grumbling throughout the whole task.

The younger _miko_ bit her lip as she struggled with the lantern. She kept missing the hook jutting out from the ceiling. _Don't look down_ , she told herself. _I shouldn't have volunteered to do this!_

At last she gave up and sighed. "Mmm Kagome-sama that's a really mean thing to say, don't you think? I mean, I know the summer festival is coming and she is here to assist us with the preparations—but instead she's just lounging in the priest's office in _his_ chair while taking selfies on her phone and munching on the peanuts from his drawer, and not just any peanuts, but the special black ones I bought especially for him during my trip to Taiwan…"

"I admire how you can say all that while still putting an empathetic face."

"I'm not done yet. She has a weird smell to her too."

"It's brinestone. I _told_ you she crawled out from a volcano."

Amari pouted. "Can we at least agree Jyohaku-sama should have been here? At least he wouldn't enforce overtime on us." She added wistfully, "I miss the priest." A sudden energy renewed her determination and she strived again, reaching up on tiptoe, the hook almost touching the lantern now…

Kagome looked up to her friend with a smile, reaching up to pat her back. The head priest was consigned to another shrine for the week, and a relief staff had been arranged in his absence to help prepare for the upcoming summer festival. Unfortunately the person had not been much of a help…and the two _miko_ found themselves doing everything on their own, from planning the festival activities right to hand-crafting the decorations itself. It was exhausting to say the least, and they had no choice but to stay late in the shrine every day.

"There there, he'll come back soon alright."

Amari squealed as Kagome's patting cause her to teeter and lost her balance. She managed to stay put on the ladder, but the lantern had slipped from her fingers. It crashed onto the floor. Kagome and her friend stared at the disfigured ornament, then slowly to each other's faces. That was going right out of their pockets.

" _Girls_!" came a squeaking shriek from the garden.

They lumbered to the garden reluctantly. On the pond bridge stood the relief _miko_ , who was lunged over looking into the waters, her head shaking side to side frantically. When the two ladies approached, she snapped her head up, her open-mouthed expression signalling an ongoing meltdown.

"My phone!" she screamed. She pointed into the pond, her finger like a harpoon stabbing into a whale. "It dropped into the pond!"

Kagome and Amari eyed each other, trying hard to contain the laugh bubbling within their chests.

Hana was an older _miko_ in her early thirties, and served in a shrine up at Nishidai for six years and counting. Usually coquettish in the presence of men (something to note when she first came to introduce herself to Jyohaku), she quickly lost her charm with her female workmates, as soon as her bossy and lazy nature began to rear its ugly head.

Kagome managed a sympathetic look. "How awful. Now you can't take any more photos of yourself."

Hana's nose flared. She knew the ladies were secretly gloating over her misfortune. The cheek of them, really! She stared at Kagome first, who appeared unperturbed before finally setting her sights on Amari.

"You!" she barked. "Get down and retrieve my phone for me!"

The _miko_ visibly quaked. "H-huh? How?"

"I don't care! Go jump into the pond and get it for me!" Seeing the incredulous look on their faces, and her slipping grip on them, Hana quickly decided on an ultimatum. "Or… Or I complain to the priest on your negligence! Failure to keep the bridge pathway clean, thereby causing me to slip and lose my phone!"

Blood rushed to Kagome's face. This woman was just too much! "Hey wait a minute!" she shouted. "I may have tolerated your lazy ass because you're a senior, but I'm not gonna let you bully my partner like that!"

"So you jumped into the pond," Sesshoumaru surmised after Kagome had related the chain of events, her burning head on his lap.

"Yes I did. And now I'm coming down with a cold."

"It's the second time you have fallen sick in half a year," he remarked, and he brushed away her long hair covering her miserable face. He had been utterly shocked, going home earlier that evening after a day's shooting, only to see Kagome sprawled out in the main entrance. "It is as though your immune system had taken a plunge. Pun intended."

Kagome groaned inwardly. "I have to curb my fever before it reaches its pitch. Darn it, I can't afford to take leave now. Poor Amari, she'll be alone."

"Even at this state you are thinking of others."

"You would too, if you were me."

He held her shoulder for a while, holding his silence as Kagome remained weakly on the bed, taking slow breaths. Then he said, "I will nurse you back till you gain enough strength. This is my purpose here, after all."

She looked up at him, letting her eyes rest on his face for a moment. "That's really sweet, Sesshoumaru. But you kinda realize that you're the reason I fall sick easily now, right?"

Sesshoumaru smiled down at her. It was an odd smile, one that sent chills through the rising temperature in her blood.

"There is a certain charm in seeing you in this vulnerable, helpless state. If only that swim had dampened your incessant chatter."

"You're not listening."

He allowed her to rest. Kagome slept, her interwoven fever dreams inducing a fitful slumber. Once in awhile, a familiar laughter would probe the murky corners of her relenting consciousness, and somewhere in that darkness she knew it was the _zashiki warashi,_ the child spirit in her house up to its tricks.

She woke up somewhere in the night, her head heavy as lead and her throat dry like sandpaper. Kagome groggily dragged herself to the toilet. As she sat on the cold pot, her mind dwelling on work, a shadow of a movement at the bathtub caught her eye. She thought she was having another fervid dream, but no, this was real, that rush of cold blood in her veins was real, which meant that _thing_ was real—

There was a red-skinned creature squatting in her bathtub, its long tongue noisily licking the white porcelain.

Kagome screamed.

Awhile later, Sesshoumaru sat crouched near the bathtub with an observant gaze while Kagome stood behind him, arms folded tightly, shaking. The ghastly being had conveniently disappeared outright.

"I believe you saw the _akaname_ ," Sesshoumaru stated calmly. "It's a creature that licks the mildew and grime in dirty baths. Often appears during summer." He wiped a finger inside and frowned. "This is strange. I always clean the bathtub every morning." He then shot her a look for validation. "You know I do."

"Sesshoumaru, what is this?" Kagome finally wailed, clutching her head. She was on the verge of collapsing. First the creepy _zashiki warashi,_ and now this! "Have you been attracting demons in my house?"

He rubbed his chin, still frowning. "Hn. I suppose they are attracted to my aura." He stood up, gripping his fist with vigour, his face awashed with a hardened fortitude "No matter. I shall peruse them to my advantage to gain more strength."

"No way—I absolutely do not tolerate all of your questionable guests here!"

"They are no more guests—they've become permanent members in the household now."

Kagome squinted at him in disbelief. She couldn't even be mad, not when she was sick and losing strength in her legs. He caught her just as in time as her knees gave way. Sesshoumaru put his arm around the _miko_ 's quivering body. Her body had gotten slightly warmer, and of the moment, a bath was not a wise idea.

"Your fever is rising. Do you wish for me to wipe you down?" he asked as he guided her back to her room. Then like a careful afterthought, he added, "I shall promise to be gentle and tender."

"I want to go back to bed," Kagome whined.

"Yes, we can do so in bed too."

"No!"

 _A few days later…_

That morning Jyohaku stood still under the _tori_ gate before the shrine, in pure wonder. The bright lanterns and exciting banners greeted him at the entrance, all ready for the summer festival. He muttered under his breath. "I can't believe they actually put the decorations up so fast."

"Jyohaku-sama!" He heard an enthusiastic cry from the shrine. His two apprentices came rushing up to him, their arms spread out in joy. "You're back! We missed you!"

"I must have gotten to the wrong shrine!" the priest gasped, shuffling backwards from the squealing ladies.

" _Kyaaaaa!_ Please don't leave us again!"

* * *

The ten-thousand yen note flung down on the counter. Ichiro stared at it, before his eyes roved back up to the customer, who drilled him with a condescending gaze.

"What's wrong with you?" he mumbled, finally steeling up his courage. This, he thought, this was definitely personal. "What did I ever do to you? Why do you hate me so much?"

Sesshoumaru smirked lightly. "That is a rather underrated observation on your part. I do not hate you." Then he lowered his voice to a whisper and leaned forward, an ominous glint washing over his eyes. "I _despise_ you."

He gathered the plastic bags of groceries in his hand. Sesshoumaru stopped just before exiting from the supermarket doors, knowing full well Ichiro was still staring hard at him.

"Ironic, is not," Sesshoumaru said. "That while it is understandable that she does not remember, apparently you do not, too."

And before Ichiro could ask anything more, he quickly stepped through the doors and disappeared into the night, leaving the store manager purely confused and shaken.

 _To be continued!_


	17. Bonsai Kitten: Part 1

**A/N: I'm so sorry if my fic is turning sombre over the chapters... It's supposed to be a comedy... So this chapter will be light-hearted to compensate for all the dreariness *cries in small corner***

 **Bonsai Kitten: Part 1**

After just a few deft snips of his small clippers, the crown of the bonsai tree now looked much neater and immaculate. Sesshoumaru edged slightly backwards to get a better view. Yes, perfect. Then his line of sight travelled to the other bonsai tree just beside. It looked like an old poodle. An old poodle sporting unsightly gnarly branches, with weeds sprouting near its roots.

Shaking his head, he directed his clippers to trim the wayward leaves. This sad little travesty of a bonsai tree belonged to Kagome.

Both trees had been purchased on a whim a few months ago. A new gardening store had popped up, and soon every housewife in town was suddenly interested in gardening, and for some, the more complicated art of topiary. Kagome wasn't a housewife. But she had pulled him (figuratively, of course) by the ear, and before he knew it they were leaving the store with _two_ bonsai plants. _It's too adorable_ , she said. _Don't they just look those screaming mandrake thingies from Harry Potter_ , she said. _Imma call this one Billy and tie a ribbon around its trunk. Billy the Bonsai. Good one, eh?_

Why two, he never bothered asking. One for me, one for you, he quickly assumed then. Except that Sesshoumaru was never interested in bonsai plants in the first place. Had Kagome asked him—and oh, was it such an easy question to ask if one bothered, just a simple, "My dear, don't mind my curiosity, but are there any kind of plants that you especially fancy?" would have sufficed—he would have declared that a pot of lemongrass would be good to keep the mosquitos away.

To make matters worse, Kagome's bonsai craze only lasted a mere few weeks. Over time the reality of its high maintenance began to override its appeal. It no more appeared like those magical creatures on film, but instead a small living burden. It was a phase, and nothing more.

And now Sesshoumaru found himself bending over his and _her_ bonsai trees, tending to them in resignation.

He wondered if all humans were like so. To invest that much interest, only to lose them very shortly. Or perhaps, it was only his Kagome.

Sesshoumaru's internal monologue was interrupted by the soft ringing of the alarm clock.

He stopped his work and listened intently for a moment. It was now time for the _miko_ to rise up.

"Miko," he softly urged by the bedside. " _Miko_."

She groaned. Her head turned heavily towards him.

"I'm sleepy," she murmured, eyes still tightly closed. He waited for a while and she groaned again, rolling away in bed. "Mmmm...what time is it?"

"6.15am."

"Already? Ughhh."

"You have approximately 45 mins to get ready for work. 25, if you intend to savour your breakfast."

Her willpower to open her eyes suddenly surged. She lifted her head and gaped at him expectantly. "So what's for breakfast?"

"Yours or mine?"

"Uh...mine?"

"Today will be your favourite pancakes."

"With extra whipped cream and strawberries?"

"Just the way you like it."

"And chocolate chips in it?"

"A full cup of them."

Kagome was fully awake now. Grinning and slightly salivating. Or was that last night's drool?

"Wait," she went, suddenly suspicious. "Then what's your breakfast?"

Sesshoumaru looked deep into her sleep-sunken eyes.

"Apparently...she is still in bed."

A hushed silence fell over them. When it hit her Kagome lunged forward to pull him by his cheek, distorting his placid features.

"Stop saying such things with that stoic face!"

Sesshoumaru frowned. "It is simply my nature."

Awhile later, still in her pyjamas, Kagome sat at the kitchen table, scarfing down her pancakes.

She peered at her housemate seated opposite her. Gone was the cotton Hello Kitty apron, replaced by a sturdier grey canvas, severe like the look in his eyes now. His hair was longer now as well, gathered in an annoyingly effortless knot.

Her fork travelled mid-way to her mouth. "You know it used to be cute, maybe like, during the first few times. But now it's like, how do I say this, a bit intrusive?"

Sesshoumaru removed his hand that was cupping his chin. "Speak your mind, miko. 'Tis too early in the morning to be solving riddles."

"You. Staring at me while I eat."

Sesshoumaru pondered, and nodded.

"I agree. You used to be somewhat endearing when you eat—now you are simply gobbling and chomping down your food like a farmhouse turkey." His eyebrows knitted in a subtle expression of disgust. "It's almost... _uncivilised_."

Kagome hurled her fork down the plate. "No breakfast for you!"

" _Summer loving had me a blast_ ," Amari hummed, as she dusted the rows of Shinto texts on the archives shelves in the Yukino Shrine. " _Summer loving happened so fast_."

Suddenly a dark face loomed quietly into view from behind the shelves.

"Kirihata, do you like cats?" the head priest whispered.

"Aieeee!" Amari nearly fainted.

"What's going on?" Kagome's head popped into the room just in time.

"You found a small, stray kitten? And it needs a home?" Kagome concluded after hearing the priest's tale. All of them were assembled in his office. "But Jyohaku-sama, I thought you love having cats as pets."

The priest steepled his hands on the desk, almost as if to hide his troubled face. "Well, that's the problem. I have too many cats now."

"How many?" Kagome innocently enquired.

"I'm unable to fit in one more, that's for sure."

Kagome and Amari glanced at each other in question.

"Well, how many?"

"I rather not say," answered the priest, as he glanced outside the window.

"Twelve cats?!" Kagome later bellowed at the fortune-telling station outside the shrine, while refilling the number sticks in the tins. "Twelve cats... Someone's totally digging the spinster life!"

"I didn't know the priest had a penchant to bring home stray cats," added Amari, slotting the fortune slips in the numbered drawers. "He truly has a heart of gold."

"I think he has a strange addiction, more like."

Amari turned to her partner. "Well, can't you keep the kitty as a pet, Kagome-sama?"

Kagome shrugged. "I'd like to, but I don't think my housemate is fond of cats, frankly speaking. He doesn't tell me—it's just a feeling."

"How would you know if you never ask him?"

"He has always been a... How do u say this, a dog person?"

Amari pouted, pausing for a while. "Well I'm allergic to cats, so I'm totally out."

Kagome wondered about it. "Wow, that totally sucks."

"Why do you say that?" Amari asked curiously.

"Obviously, you can't live with a cat hoarder like Jyohaku-sama then," she stated matter-of-factly. Seeing the dejected look on Amari's face, she quickly realised her blunder. "Um, what I mean is, you _can_ , just that there's going to be a lot of compromise..."

"Well I believe if you really love someone, you'll try your best to adapt," Amari said with a small smile.

Kagome smiled back at her, albeit a bit uneasily. The topic was touching too close to home. She pretended to place more focus in her work.

"Speaking of adapt, how has your experience been so far working here, Amari-chan?"

"It's lovely. It gets really gruelling, but, I feel a sense of satisfaction. Plus I'm really attached to this place," Amari said, looking back at the shrine.

"I don't remember asking you this, but why did you decide to be a _miko_ , Amari-chan?"

Amari laughed. "Oh it wasn't my idea initially. It was my brother's."

"You mean Ichiro-kun?"

"Uh-uh. He has always had this weird fixation on shrine maidens since he was a kid. For example, he would dream of them and sketch them on paper all day long." Amari paused. "We all thought he would grow out if it, but apparently he didn't."

Kagome placed the full tin aside, slowly. "Does he still continue drawing them?"

"Well he doesn't, but..." Amari shook her head, her short hair bouncing. "Anyway, he's the one who suggested me to pursue this profession. I didn't really have an idea of what to do after college anyway. I wasn't a very smart student."

 _At least you finished college_ , Kagome thought.

"Well put it this way," she then said, holding her friend's shoulder with a gentle smile. "You wouldn't have met Jyohaku-sama, otherwise right?"

Amari stared back at her, her eyes shimmering. "Kagome-sama... Do you... _know_ about it?"

Kagome laughed. "Of course I do, but _he_ doesn't."

Amari giggled, and hugged her tightly. "And one more thing. I wouldn't have made a good friend like you either, Kagome-sama."

"It's such a pity. It's a really cute kitten though. You saw its photo, didn't you?"

"Yes! And I couldn't stand seeing the priest so depressed."

And so that night, Kagome decided to venture into a little "query" of her own.

As usual Sesshoumaru was poised rigidly on the couch, unblinking eyes fixated on the television. An opened pack of potato chips sat on his lap. All those junk food and he still failed to gain weight.

She sank into the seat beside him, quietly at first. He remained engrossed, too absorbed.

One would think he had been possessed by the screen. Kagome glanced to see what had wholly captured his attention, to the point he had failed to even acknowledge her presence. It miffed her slightly. No, correction. It pissed her greatly.

A woman in an elaborate kimono was kneeling on a theatre stage. Her face was paper-white, made up in a stereotypical _kabuki_ fashion. As her neck swung in an extremely fluid, almost snake-like manner, her face depicted a discernible kind of expression, somewhere between sorrow and pain. In the background taiko drums rolled towards a feverish pitch, as a solemn voice called out in archaic words.

Kagome followed the scene with much disinterest. She toyed with the frayed hem of her sleeve.

"Hey," she said.

Sesshoumaru ignored her. She bumped his shoulder hard.

" _Heyyy_."

Seeing he was paying her not even the slightest attention, she quickly jumped into his lap, blocking his view.

"Sesshoumaru!"

Instantly Sesshoumaru shoved her with one push, and she was sent rolling off the couch. Seething, Kagome dived for the TV remote control and switched the TV off.

"I'm talking!" she screeched.

Sesshoumaru finally looked at her, visibly irritated. "What, _miko_?"

"Do you like cats?"

Sesshoumaru's face went blank for a while. Then a smile slowly curled the edge of his lips.

"I adore cats, as much as I adore you…" he said, "…for barring me from watching an extremely critical performance of The Heron's Maiden—"

"Sesshoumaru, this is on DVD. You watch this every. Single. Day!"

He put up a finger. "One word: Tamasaburo."

Kagome stared at him in open-mouthed disbelief. "So…do you like cats?"

"Perhaps if you allow me to watch this in peace, I might just tell you."

But he failed to inform her, or rather he _forgot,_ and the next day to his great consternation, the doorbell had rang.

Sesshoumaru opened the door. It was the head priest, with a cat basket in his hand.

 _To be continued!_

 **A/N: Does anyone remember the bonsai kitten internet hoax like years ago? No? Apparently there was a website detailing how to grow kittens in small jars… Disturbed the hell out of me as kid. (It was later proved to be fake, don't worry) That aside, do comment my latest chapter and I'm sorry for late updates. I love you all, really.**


	18. Bonsai Kitten: Part II

**Bonsai Kitten (Part II)**

 **[A/n: I know, I know, I'm faaaaaaar behind on updates. RL has been crazy. I just got hitched and I'm planning for my wedding. Gaaahhh. But I won't ever abandon this baby. That's why I am writing this chapter on my work PC. Hahahahha.]**

 _Snip, snip._

His hand moved with minute precision, calm, steady, almost mechanical _._ The bonsai leaves shed like tiny tears each time the blades touched them. What a pity, cutting away perfectly healthy leaves and branches, for the sole purpose of aesthetics. He supposed there was an art to it, of course, and a philosophy that layered behind. There is always a philosophy attached to something, isn't there, Sesshoumaru thought. Surely what lost, miserable creatures would we be without them, and we spent our short, transient lives just seeking meaning even in the most trivial of things.

There was something else he thought too. What had become of him until he had arrived to this state, grooming a bonsai plant while waxing philosophical? A deep sigh dragged out of his chest, weary. It wasn't even _his_.

"Why don't you just give up, old man?" said a voice behind him. Sesshoumaru turned. He knew who it was. The stray cat Kagome had welcomed into the house two weeks ago. It had a name, or something, one he did not bother to remember. With a smirk pair of jade-green eyes set against a tortoise-shell coat, Sesshoumaru thought it was the ugliest cat he had ever seen.

"What did you say?" Sesshoumaru asked, and his voice was very high and still.

"Oh, my bad," the filthy, drain-exploring animal said again. It had a very lazy voice, as though moving its tongue required much effort on its part. "I meant to say, you old _demon_. Anyway, you should have known by this time that nothing here is ever yours. You're living on borrowed time, by someone's mercy."

Sesshoumaru watched as the cat turned to lick his furry back. Then, as if it remembered something, it looked at Sesshoumaru dead in the eyes. "I'm hungry. The mistress isn't up yet, so serve me some breakfast, would you?"

Sesshoumaru suddenly sprang forward, aiming for the cat. It screeched back in fear, and in a frenzied attempt to escape, tore through the rice-paper screen of the sliding door.

"Are you trying to kill me? The _gall_ of it! The mistress won't let you get away with this!" it yelled as it ran helter-skelter in the living-room, knocking over the light furniture, with Sesshoumaru hot on its heels, sharp clippers in hand. "You are by far the worst servant I ever encountered! Go rot in hell, you expired dog!"

At that very moment, Kagome, having woken up by the loud scuffle outside, appeared from her room, rubbing her eyes still heavy from sleep. She saw the murderous intent in Sesshoumaru's eyes, the glint of his intended weapon. And the poor screaming kitten, scared to death, scuttling on its little legs away from him.

It dashed and jumped into her arms. " _Sesshoumaru_!" Kagome shrieked, shielding the kitten with her body, away from him. "How could you! You mad, bloodthirsty beast! How could you even think to hurt this sweet, innocent..."

"It is not sweet, and it is definitely not innocent!" Sesshoumaru snarled, his patience but a thin wire.

"Are you hurt anywhere, Shippo-chan?" she cooed to him. ""My poor little baby…" Her eyes lashed back at him, angry now. "Enough! I caught you countless of times trying to harm this animal! And to think you said before that you adored cats-"

"I never did. As a matter of fact, I _abhor_ cats!"

"Oh, that's not what you said when I asked you two weeks ago while you were watching TV!"

"That was an attempt at sarcasm, which I can see now sailed right over your head. I shall say this once and for all, felines are but an abomination of nature and should, at all costs, be exterminated!"

"And I say this now and forever: you are unbelievable! Always has been!"

"No, _you_ are. To think you would accept this offensive creature into this house without consulting me. Who do you think cleans up after it when you're at work? Your enthusiasm lasted a mere week, just like your passion for bonsai trees."

Kagome folded her arms angrily. "Well excuse me! It's _my_ house."

For a moment, her reply silenced him, and it hurt more than anything she had said, or done. The sheer realization that such a simple phrase could even affect him was almost _paralyzing_.

Indignant, Sesshoumaru yanked the apron of his body. He lifted his chin, his jaw tight, his breaths more measured now. "It stays, and I go."

Kagome gasped, clutching the kitten even tighter. "You wouldn't dare."

Quietly, Sesshoumaru cast the apron aside and he strode across the living-room towards the main door. Kagome watched after him, pale and quivering.

"Impossible", she muttered to herself. "He wouldn't leave. He's going to come back in a few minutes. An hour tops. Just wait and see." She snorted angrily and turned away, stroking the struggling kitten in her arms.

 _He can't live without me. He needs me more than I do._

 _Right?_

* * *

Then she heard the door shut, and it took her a few seconds in the trailing silence of the house that there really was a chance. Even the tiniest of bit, her heart whispered, that _he might not ever come back._

When Jyohaku reached her house, Kagome was already sitting at the doorstep. The cat was meowing at her incessantly; it sounded hungry and desperate. And she was not responding to it because she was busy hugging herself tightly, a piece of cloth in her hands, and was she...no, that couldn't be…

"Higurashi, are you crying?" Jyohaku asked bluntly.

Kagome looked up with wet, tear-stricken eyes, her mouth wide open. "Noooo...I'm not cryingggg. I'm just so angryyyy…."

He shrugged. "I'm positive I know what crying sounds like."

She stood up slowly, sobbing into the cloth. "He really did it. He really went ahead to leave me. I just can't believe it! It's been four _hours_!"

"Who?" the priest asked, stupefied at this point.

" _Sesshoumaruuuu_ …."

"Your housemate?" He frowned further in confusion, but then saw something else that really needed his attention. "My god, have you not been feeding the kitten? I entrusted you with it, and you just leave it hungry like this."

"We fought over Shippo," Kagome continued to bawl, the apron in her hands now tainted with mucus. "He said he was going to leave if I didn't throw it out…"

"So that's why you called me here." Jyohaku shook his head. "Ridiculous. I told you not to keep a pet if you can't commit to it." And she wailed even louder in reply.

"Well, are you hungry, little one?" Jyohaku beckoned to the kitten. It meowed shrilly at him then ran back into the house, looking at him over its shoulder. Jyohaku ambled after it. He followed the kitten to the kitchen, where it waited for him beside the empty bowl. Except, well, it wasn't really empty in human standards. He shook the bowl a bit, to close the gaping hole in the middle of the biscuits, then placed it back on the floor. The kitten bit through the food voraciously, its teeth cracking against the dry food.

Jyohaku petted its small downy head, then wondered if Kagome had followed his advice, to occasionally alternate between dry and wet food. Well he wouldn't ask her _now_ , not when she was in the middle of a strange mental breakdown.

"Hey, where are you going?" he called after the kitten was done eating. It had skipped into the storeroom, which had been left slightly ajar.

Jyohaku paused. The storeroom. That was where they had kept his late mother's belongings. He hadn't really gone though it much after she passed away and the house was left vacant. That was of course, before Kagome became a _miko_ herself and the house was rented to her.

He swung open the door carefully and poked his head in. He saw his mother's favourite record player, its bronze, bell-shaped speaker peeking out in the dimness. He saw a row of music records, looking like they had been moved recently. Does Higurashi listen to her music? he carelessly wondered. Smiling at the strange prospect, he stepped into the room and turned around to see more.

Immediately, he saw the small structure at the corner of the room, and froze. What the hell, he thought. Was that an altar? He approached it with cautious steps, and his eyes swept over the un-lit red candles, and the conspicuous bowl in the middle.

A bead of cold sweat rolled past his right temple and he instinctively reached for his rosary beads inside his pockets.

"Whatever happened to that ghost you sired?" Jyohaku later brought up the subject casually outside the house. Shippo was now back in the cat basket, just like the way it had come here, and god knows _how_ he was going to deal with it now. He had been one happy man some time ago when Kagome had offered to keep the kitten as a pet, but now… Another one for the hoard, he guessed. Thank god he didn't have a housemate like hers who disapproved of cats; it was really just cats, or no one.

"Huh? Ghost?" Kagome lifted her head. Her eyes were swollen now and her nose was bloated. Jyohaku curbed the urge to smack some sense back into her head.

"The one that gave me an incredibly useless list of lottery numbers."

The confusion that clouded over her face promptly disappeared, and her smile appeared like the sun, the transition being quite child-like. It unnerved him, for some reason.

"He's not a ghost anymore," she said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "He is real, with needs...and feelings."

Her head dropped back in despair and she sighed. _That's the part I always forget_ , she thought. _That he actually, really, has feelings too._

Jyohaku stood there, petrified.

* * *

Someone poked her cheek with a cold finger. Kagome woke up with a stagger, as though she had been splashed with a bucket of water. She was still sitting by the doorstep.

"Why are you napping outside?" Sesshoumaru's solemn face hovered over the fringes of her crusty vision.

"Sesshoumaru! I already called the priest to take Shippo away!" She grabbed him desperately by the shoulders as he knelt down. Before she could gather her words, a dense mob of emotions overtook her. She was crying-again. And it was especially bad now, because she had started to sob too. Ugh, she _hated_ crying in front of anyone. Her tough exterior just went out of the window.

"So why were you sleeping outside again, pray tell?"

She shook her head. "I thought I was strong. But I wasn't. I don't know why. But I _need_ you." Gosh, she couldn't believe she said that. But it was true, goddammit. Every word was true.

Her voice was cracking and she couldn't even look at him in the face. He should already be amused right now by her antics, but his face bore no reaction, almost as though he had expected it. With a nonchalant look, he began to cup her face with his hands and wiped her tears off.

"Please," she pleaded, just in case her words were not getting into him, "don't do that again. Please don't leave like that."

He smirked lightly. "Ah, I was gone but only for half a day."

"Promise me!" she went, almost choking his throat. Sesshoumaru pried her anguished hands off him.

"Foolish woman," he was glaring now, "You know I cannot leave you, even if I wanted to."

"Y-you mean you were only teasing me?"

He closed his eyes and sighed. "No, not that either. I really wanted to leave." Then his voice lowered to a more gentler tone. "But the thought that you might possibly be dying of starvation without me… That, plus I was quite famished as well…"

Kagome pouted. "I'm really sorry," she started. "I know you've heard this too many times. It's just that, I've never really been with anyone like this and… And sometimes it makes me realize certain things about myself. All this time I thought I was a really nice person, but then someone comes along, and proves that it's the opposite. That I have my bad sides, too. And ever since I've been with you, I've seen so many sides of me that I didn't like. The immature, the selfish, and the arrogant sides. It has definitely made me re-evaluate who I am as a person."

Sesshoumaru shook his head slowly. "No, there is nothing wrong with you. Your traits are only...human."

"No, that's not true. We're better than this. _I'm_ better than this. And I want to show you I'm capable of that."

"Why?" he asked, genuinely curious. "Why do you need to be good to me?" He lifted her face to read her features more clearly. Her emotions were so convoluted right then, he could not understand exactly what she was feeling. She was biting down on her lips, and avoiding eye contact. "There is nothing more I can ask from you, apart from this second chance in life. I am the one who has no right to ask, or to intervene in your personal decisions. If anything, I am the selfish one here."

"But…" Kagome hesitated. "I _want_ you to intervene."

Sesshoumaru went speechless for a few seconds. "Now I am confused."

Kagome covered her face. _Ughhhh, pull yourself together, won't you! Stop embarrassing yourself! Sesshoumaru has probably already given up on you at this point. That's why he's taking in everything so easily._

Her barrage of thoughts were interrupted when Sesshoumaru suddenly started laughing. She looked at him slightly in awe. He had crease lines on his face she didn't even know existed. And that laugh. It sounded so pleasant, and made him so-and she realized this with a combined twinge of dread and of something else in her stomach-bloody attractive. She swallowed.

He ran his hand through his hair. "It was pretty much easier when we first started out, was it not?" Then his smile dropped and he looked at her intently in the eyes, and again that twinge in her stomach, deeper this time. " _Miko_. I am serious. It has almost been a month. And I am really running low on fuel."

Kagome smiled like a schoolgirl, a stupid, too-wide smile she hoped he would not remember. She extended her wrist. Sesshoumaru cocked an eyebrow in reply.

"I really liked when you did it that way, that time."

"Oh," he said. A strange smile lit his eyes. "It will hurt a little, however."

To which Kagome looked away, because the heat was too much around her body, and when her words came out, they dragged so hard against her throat she just wanted to die.

"I don't mind...if it's you."

 ** _To be continued..._**

 **[A/N: One wonders why it took Kagome so long to get her act together... Yes I admit she has been acting somewhat _unpleasant,_ because it's much easier to think that Sesshoumaru doesn't has feelings she needs to consider of, isn't it? After all the idea that he does has feelings is a little overwhelming. Not only that, he is invoking weird feelings in her too. Being a miko, there will a definitely a strong self-conflict within her. I guess it will take her more than that to fully embrace his being completely. On the other hand, she did bring him in voluntarily...so she needs to be responsible for the consequences. This goes to the people who are eager to be rescuing aliens from Area 51...okay that is a joke hahaha.**

 **PS. "Why can the kitten talk and how does it know Sess is a demon?" Ummm don't you know animals have a sixth sense? Lmao, maybe I'll bring the smartass in back if y'all like it.]**

 **Please read and review, I need my validations from strangers...not even gonna be discreet about this... T_T]**


	19. In Which Nothing Much Happens

**[A/N: Hey guys, I know, another update in a week? *gasps*]**

 **In Which Nothing Much Happens, but Something Happens**

 _During one of those short summer seasons, the ones he had spent with her at least_ — _barely using all of his fingers should he ever bother to count them_ — _she came to him on not-so-little feet, her hand grasping small empty husks, dusty, dirty. He wished she'd knew better, but she did not, and a while later he began to wonder if her lack of knowledge was really a part on his negligence._

 _"Sesshoumaru-sama, what are these?" she asked, offering her hands to him so he could see better._

 _He hesitated. "They're dead cicadas, Rin."_

 _"Oh!" She jumped back, although her hands held them more protectively than ever. "Do they all die in this way? Like these empty shells?"_

 _"It is how they expire naturally."_

 _She held them closer to her face, squinting as she inspected them with one eye._

 _"How long do they live before they die?"_

 _"Depends," he said, and he was looking elsewhere now, because he was bored, and the breeze had not passed for a while and Jaken had yet to return. But most of all, he did not want to be sitting there, talking about cicadas._

 _"What does_ depends _, mean?" she was asking him with a tilt of her head._

 _Sesshoumaru turned and looked hard at her. Her brown eyes were shining even brightly in the summer sun. Dead leaves clung to her matted hair, and a distinct smell wafted from her. He blinked. That smell_ was _her, just a little different from before. Since when did it change?_

 _He lowered his eyes to the dead shells. "They live underground after they are hatched. Sometimes for a year, sometimes longer. Then their wings grow and they fly around for a few weeks."_

 _"Just a few weeks?"_

 _"Just a few weeks."_

 _"And they die?"_

 _"Don't all living things? You are older now, you must know better."_

 _"I don't want to die like a cicada."_

 _"You will not."_

 _She was gazing rather forlornly at them now. He wanted to tell her right then, no Rin, there is no sympathy for a slight work of nature, and then for some reason his eyes flicked to her, then back to the empty husks. A strange imagery took form in his mind, where her body was no longer human, but that of a big, dessicated shell instead._

 _"Throw them away," he ordered. "And you shall speak of this no more."_

* * *

It was one of those days in the middle of a sweltering August, during the cruel height of summer. Summer was always a busy time for Kagome in the shrine, and now that the festival had just ended last weekend, everyone had taken a big sigh of relief. It was as if a great burden had been removed from their shoulders. Finally they could all stretch their backs and celebrate a different kind of occasion. No more crowded nights! No more endless pandering to guests! And Kagome's biggest cheer: No more extra clean-up duty!

Yukino-jingu would be open only until noon for the day. It wasn't because they were a small shrine in a small town that earned them that flexibility in opening hours; but that the head priest, known to be rather unorthodox in his circles, just couldn't give a rat's ass.

The reason for the early closure: they all had been invited to a wedding ceremony. Although Atsushi had left the shrine two years ago, he still remembered his old workmates, and the hell he had suffered there (which probably contributed to the close bonding he formed with the other apprentices). And whether it was out of social pressure or not, even Jyohaku had received an invitation card.

Earlier that morning while munching through her diet cereal in the kitchen alone, Kagome was conjuring up ideas of what to wear in her head. However, none of these images in her mind were satisfactory.

She was striding to her room half in excitement, half in anxiety, when something in the corner of her eye caught her attention and stopped her in her tracks.

There was a lone cicada resting snugly in a corner of two walls at her living room. A ubiquitous creature of summer. Also, a garish black spot against the backdrop of cornflower-blue wallpaper. It laid very still, not eliciting that high-pitched cry they were notorious for. Kagome wondered how long it had been sitting there. She also wondered something else.

With the agenda now changed, she quickly proceeded to Sesshoumaru's room instead.

Kagome knocked hard. He didn't answer. Should she open his door? she pondered. _Ah, maybe, just a wee bit_ , and her hand twisted the doorknob before the thought could complete itself. Immediately her eyes were greeted with the scene of a male figure mid-way wearing a pair of trousers, and nothing else. It was almost in slow-motion, with every detail made glaring under the bright morning light filtering in through the room windows.

Kagome jerked backwards, pulling the door with her. She turned to grimace against the door.

"Yes?" his voice floated out from inside, nonchalant as always.

"There's...a… There's a bug on the wall." _If only there was an actual, important reason_ , Kagome thought, red, and dying a little on the inside.

A moment of consideration. And then he said, "Let it be."

"Can you, ah, maybe do something about it?" Kagome asked, wishing she didn't sound so desperate then.

"I am rushing for work right now."

There was an underlying hint of impatience in his voice. She had lived long enough with him to pick it up. "Besides," he continued, and it sounded like he was changing into a shirt now, "since when have you been offended by a mere critter on the wall?"

"I'm just having this huge, irrational fear that it might creep into my ear at night." She rubbed her arms as though she was cold. "I'm having goosebumps just thinking about it."

She thought she heard a chuckle. "I used to remember a young _miko_ would not even flinch at the sight of a venomous wasp the size of her head. Or perhaps..." and there was a deliberate pause in his words, "that did not happen at all."

Kagome quietly fumed and grinded her jaw.. "And _I_ remember a certain demon lord who would never _dream_ he would be late for work one day, all because he decided to stay up all night watching Youtube reviews..."

"I need to know what is the best automatic can-opener to purchase."

"Really? A can-opener?"

"Only the best."

The door swung open, and Sesshoumaru appeared from behind to peer at her face. "I shall see you tonight, brave _miko_ ," he then said, sauntering off to leave.

"And I bid thee farewell, O Punctual Demon Lord!" Kagome called out after him, as she watched his retreating back.

* * *

The two ladies, still buzzing with excitement and pink from mild intoxication from the wedding, could not stop giggling at the back of the Honda Vezel. At the steering wheel, their designated driver continued to drive back home, his face mirthless and bored.

"Atsushi looks so happy, doesn't he? And the bride was sooo pretty," Kagome gushed. Amari giggled, her hands clasped together in hope.

"Gee, just looking at them makes me wanna get married too." She sighed. "We really miss Atsushi-kun, don't we?"

"Hey Jyohaku-sama," Kagome spoke to the front, "didn't you say you were in the process of hiring a new apprentice? Whatever happened to that?"

The priest twisted his mouth as he turned right into an intersection. "I'm not too sure, seeing how you all mistreated Miss Hana when she came to help for the festival preparations." Jyohaku spied the mutual look of disbelief on the ladies reflected on the rear-view mirror, then gave a short chuckle. "Just kidding. You spoke too soon. There's a new headcount coming in next month. Young, handsome chap. I think you might like him, Kirihata."

"Oh, I don't really go for guys my age," Amari answered, with a soft, quivering voice.

"What?" Jyohaku went, his eyebrows shooting up. He looked at her reflection even harder. "You're not turning out to be some kind of gold-digger, are you?"

"No!" she exclaimed, her hands waving in panic now. No, no, no! That was the last thing she wanted him to think of her. "I would _never_ be interested in your money!"

There was a silence that followed as the car stopped at a traffic light. For awhile, Amari's heavy breathing was the only thing that filled the air. Kagome looked out through the window. There was a beautiful park on the left, its colourful trees beckoning in the summer breeze. Then the traffic light went green, and the scene zoomed past her and she followed it with a forlorn gaze.

Jyohaku cleared his throat as he stepped on the accelerator pedal. He briefly glared at Kagome through the mirror, then looked back at Amari. "But you know what's worse than a gold-digger, Kirihata?" he suddenly spoke again, and his voice was soft and suspicious, conspiratorial even. "Let me tell you. A woman who dabbles in the black arts!"

Amari gasped.

"She besieges to the wrong god to serve her dark, and evil ways..! Now _that's_ unforgivable!"

"That's horrible, Jyohaku-sama!"

"Now, you wouldn't be like that kind of person, would you?"

"O-of course not!"

Kagome rolled her eyes. "Drop me here, now," she told the priest. The car slowed down at the road curb, and she opened the door to alight. Amari pulled the window down and gaped at her friend.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"To visit a house of evil," Kagome stated, widening her eyes with dramatic flair. Then she broke into a smile and beamed. "See you at work tomorrow!"

The car sped off, leaving her. Inside, Amari sat in confusion as Jyohaku wondered if he had really stepped on Kagomes's toes.

"So, ah, what kind of women are you into, Jyohaku-sama?" Amari inquired nervously.

"Wait, haven't we been in this conversation before?"

It was a posh sort of building in the rather posh part of town, where its walkways were always teeming with posh office ladies. Walking towards the photography studio, suddenly the dress she had worn did not seem as exquisite as it did when she looked at herself in the mirror this morning.

The photography studio was located in a building covered with nothing but shiny windows, and the summer sun was having a ball with it. It hurt to even look at the building, the sun rays sparkling like sharp daggers. Kagome hurried in. Inside the lift, she scanned through a bag of snacks she had managed to grab at a nearby convenience store. She smiled to herself. _I hope he likes them_ , she thought.

It was her first time there visiting Sesshoumaru at his workplace. It was like walking through a corridor of fish tanks, of which each fish tank was a large studio room by itself. Sometimes the models would work alone, or in pairs, but either way, there would always be a crew of photographers clicking furiously away, holding props or editing pictures in a laptop. A constant bustling of activity.

And standing outside these fish tanks was always a different sort of group, ogling and craning their necks behind the glass like a bunch of tourists. They all looked relatively young, around her age.

From the constant stream of ooh-ing and aah-ing as she walked further down the corridor, it didn't take her very long to figure out that these people were fans of the models.

There was a particular large group of fans outside one "fish tank". They were mostly overzealous young ladies flashing large posters. Out of curiosity, and maybe it was really sheer instinct, Kagome stood up on tiptoes behind them to get a better view of the model inside.

No doubt. It was him.

To think Sesshoumaru had an actual fanbase, whereupon girls were literally hopping and shrieking with excitement as though they were in a concert. It was beyond her comprehension.

Kagome watched him quietly from the back. He was clad in some ancient warrior garb, brandishing a large sword. He even had a wig on. A make-up artist was patting a sponge on his face. A big fan blew towards his direction, lending his hair a windswept effect. It didn't look like him at all, and yet she knew it _was_ him.

"Amess Horusu!" the girls were screaming as if their lives depended on it. " _Amess Horusu_!"

Kagome stared at them in bewilderment. "Amess _what_?"

Suddenly the door swung opened. A tall man in a shiny suit stepped out. His eyes roved disinterestedly over the swarm of fangirls, then rested decidedly on Kagome.

"Yes?" he nodded to her.

"I uh, I'm waiting for Sesshoumaru," Kagome stammered, pointing with an awkward finger.

"Sesshoumaru?" he repeated, a perplexed look on his face. Then a moment of epiphany came to him. "Ah! You mean Mr. Amess Horusu!"

"Who did that?" Who butchered his name?"

The man laughed. He had a deep, resounding voice which accentuated the evident air of importance he carried.

"I did. A good model always needs a pseudonym. And in this case, an anagram I derived from his unusual name." He gave a short bow. "Let me introduce myself. You can call me Mr. Morikawa. I'm Amess' manager. And I suppose if you know Amess' real name, I'm guessing you must be _the_ Kagome Higurashi. There's only one Kagome Higurashi in Tokyo, right?" He saw her surprise and continued. "Ames has talked a great deal about you."

"No, he didn't," she quickly blurted.

"Oh I would too, if I had such a lovely lady for myself."

Kagome blushed, a bit overwhelmed. Just what on earth had Sesshoumaru been saying about her to others?

Mr. Morikawa smiled, eyeing her a bit keenly now. It was his first time meeting the young woman, and he decided that he liked her already. She had an attractive face, no doubt. Her smile was genuine, with a dash of guilelessness in it.

" _Miko_ ," came a familiar voice.

Sesshoumaru had poked his head out from the door. He was, in a sense, _pleasantly surprised_ to see Kagome here.

"Sesshoumaru!" she called in relief. "I was just visiting you."

"She is jealous of your fans," Mr Morikawa added.

"That's—That's not true at all!"

"Hn," Sesshoumaru went, once they were seated together on a wooden bench. He briefly assessed his surroundings. He was still dressed to the nines in his cosplay gear, although thankfully the sword did not follow. None of the passers-bys in the park took notice however; maybe it was a common scene in the area. After all, the cosplay club was just around the street. "I was unaware there was a nearby park from the studio." Then he unwrapped his onigiri salmon and bit into it. "This is good," he said.

"The finest onigiri from 7-11," Kagome replied with triumph. "Say, I didn't know you had a manager."

"Yes, I was testing for knives at the kitchenware section in Isetan when he approached me."

"I'm sure you were."

"He was aware of my status as an unregistered resident, and quickly ensured that I was issued with an ID."

"No kidding! How does that even work?"

He filched out his identity card. "I now own a legitimate proof of identity. The preparations done was nothing short of efficient."

Kagome gaped at his card. It was true—even with his peculiar face in the photo, the card still looked authentic, with a set of serial numbers and address.

"Woah. The guy is either resourceful as hell or downright shady."

"Well, I would not be working otherwise, no?"

"You're right. Did it ever occur to you though, in a thousand years, that you would be a cosplay model for a magazine?"

"Half a thousand years ago, I did not even know what a cosplay model was."

"Hmm," Kagome went, squinting at him. "You know what's funny? The fact that you have to wear a long wig during your shootings. If only you didn't chop off your hair. I really missed that."

Sesshoumaru ate the last of his snack, then rummaged the bag for more.

She shrugged, and then put on a pompous tone. "The old Sesshoumaru would have said, " _I shall grow back my hair, if that's what you wish_ , _my miko_."

Sesshoumaru shot her an incredulous look.

"Ah, the old Sesshoumaru _after_ he was reborn," she corrected.

He smirked, rolling over her words. "The old Sesshoumaru." Then he paused, and seemed to gaze at a faraway spot beyond him. "It is as though we have completely forgotten our previous lives."

"That's the only way we could ever move on, isn't it?"

 _It's not the only way_ , she thought wistfully. _It's the most_ convenient _way_.

Kagome rested her head on his shoulder. Behind the bench was a large tree to shade them, and when she looked up at him, the large crown of leaves and bright flowers framed his face against the blue sky. It was a pretty picture, one only she could see. At that moment a breeze came, light and tender, rustling through the branches. Kagome closed her eyes, and sighed a deep breath.

"But I'm happy now, Sesshoumaru. At least, I think I am. How about you?"

A small smile tugged his lips. "Like the old Sesshoumaru would have said: If you're happy, then so am I."

"You were a really good dog back then."

"Is that so? Well, forgive me for growing a backbone."

She laughed. "I'm just teasing you. What time do you have to get back?"

Sesshoumaru glanced at his watch. "A bit late is fine. I am a celebrity after all."

Kagome snorted. "I wished you said that this morning."

And then just like that, the rest of the summer days passed by. Yukino-jingu finally received their new apprentice, a bright, ambitious lad by the name of Kouhei. Kagome picked up a new hobby-needle felting. Everytime something riled her, she would be poking out some tiny, woodland creature. Sesshoumaru decided that he _might_ just let his hair grow out a bit. He also bought a new bicycle and taught himself how to ride, so sometimes, every once in awhile the pair would have a bit of fun, cycling downtown.

It was during one of those nights at the end of summer, when the autumn chill had began to whisper between trees, and the sky had taken to a more dullish shade. He was sitting in bed, having finally accustomed to the Western-style spring mattress, a collection of Matsuo Bashō's poems on his lap. At the other side Kagome lay fast asleep, her dreams no longer intertwining with her memories. Something pricked the back of his mind. Slowly he put the book away and rose, and quietly left the room.

The cicada, he was quite sure, was dead. All it left as a legacy to its short life was a physical shell of its former self, empty and hollow as the time it had spent fixed on the wall, when it could have been outside, singing with its friends.

There was a _haiku_ he had chanced upon in the book he was reading. One that had led him to remember the fate of this little creature, now certainly too late.

 _Lonely stillness—  
_ _a single cicada's cry  
_ _sinking into stone_

He shook his head, as an old memory resurfaced into his mind. It appeared surreptitiously, like a ripple across a dark lake.

He stood there at the wall for a long time, simply staring at the cicada's husk.

"Not into dust, but cast in stone," he murmured. "You hated the cicada's death, but compared to what you suffered, it would have been bliss."

Then he touched the husk with a finger, and it crumbled into smithereens of dust.

 _ **To be continued...**_

 _ **[A/N:**_ **Mr Morikawa and Kouhei are going to have more pagetime, as they add more to the plot! (what plot?) Anywaysss, I need your opinion, guys. I've always wrestled with the tone of this fic. As much I wish it was a light-hearted comedy, my fingers just love churning a more realistic (read: depressing) take on it, and as a result you have some chapters that are just comical and some that are quite heavy to read. And the truth is I kinda love writing the latter. I don't know what my readers think though. Do you prefer if this fic turns darker? But still with its comedic moments? Or do you just want a happy, fuzzy story? Hmmm...]**


	20. Dance, Shawarma Wrap

_**[A/N: Hello my beloved faithful readersss. Welcome to the 3rd arc of Binded, yayyy! With the last chapter closed, Kagome finally understands her housemate a little more, while Sesshoumaru is now more or less assimilated with the human society. Huzzah!**_

 _ **In this new arc, Kagome faces a rival who is challenging her goal to be the head miko of Yukino Shrine. Sesshoumaru's powers are growing at dangerous rate. And Ichiro finally divulges a childhood secret to Kagome… All while our favourite couple struggles with their feelings for each other! *cues suspenseful trailer music***_

 _ **There will be light swearing in this chapter. Eheh.]**_

 **Dance, Shawarma Wrap**

"One, two, swirl, and bell..."

Kagome and Amari were having a rehearsal of the sacred Kagura dance. Dressed in an elaborate costume, with a _suzu_ bell in each hand, leading the dance was none other than Hana, the more experienced _miko_ sent in from all the way in Nishidai. The very same _miko_ whom Kagome had dived in the koi pond for, to retrieve her mobile phone.

"Keep your chin up always!" she reminded, rounding around the pair with scrutinising eyes, hands behind her back, like a hungry vulture. She smacked a hand hard on Kagome's back. "And what are you—a hunchback?"

She gave an exasperated sigh.

"Seriously, I was only _twenty_ when I perfected the Kagura dance. I'm having second-hand embarrassment just watching you both. There is no speck of grace in your movements at all."

Kagome growled white teeth. They had been practising for days, and as usual, Hana was always eager to spit out any form of verbal abuse she deemed fit. And sometimes, physical too. That smack for example, just left a burning sensation on her back. Gripping her bells, she was almost ready to whack Hana in the head, when the room door slid open.

"Yoooo who wants some donuts!" Kouhei came sauntering in with a box of Krispy Kreme.

Immediately the two miko dropped their upright postures and scampered to the young priest. "Kouhei-kun!"

"Come on, you guys have been dancing for 4 hours straight. Why don't you take a break? Hana-sama, grab some too!"

The senior priestess watched in disgust as the ladies began stuffing their faces with donuts, cream and chocolate smearing all over their cheeks. Whatever elegance they had incurred from their dance training had been chucked out of the window. What gluttons they were, what scavengers!

"Disgraceful," she spat. "I don't understand why I have to deal with you incompetent girls. You're obviously not serious about this." A dark smile appeared on her face. "It's all in due time. I have a plan for this shrine all hatched in my devious mind. I'll win the priest's favour and before you know it, he'll appoint me as the main _miko_ of Yukino-jingu. I'll have complete control of everything." The three apprentices squinted at her as she burst into a witch-like, high-pitched cackle.

"What's this commotion I hear?" It was the head priest. He stopped by the door and they gasped, exposing the half-chewed donuts in their mouths.

"Jyohaku-sama!" Hana suddenly exclaimed, her voice gone all soft and melodic. She offered a Red Velvet Krispy Kreme with a smile. "We're just having a break! Would you care to have a donut?"

"What a complete snake!" Kagome later bellowed when the day was over. The three of them sat at the ledge of the main entrance, changing out their shrine sandals into their shoes. "Can you believe that woman? I thought people like her only existed as Disney villains."

Amari laughed uncertainly. "The more you know."

"Hey Amari," Kouhei said, stepping into his Reeboks, "She's gonna seduce the priest and manipulate him. We gotta do something."

"I don't think I'm a match to her," she replied, contemplating sadly at her shoes. "She'll probably win."

It was a feeling Kagome was familiar with. That sense of inadequacy, the constant comparing. She had felt like that once many years ago, but she still remembered how depressing it had been. That feeling that no matter how hard you try, _you will never be good enough._

"Hey, don't worry. " Kouhei held Amari's shoulder. For once, there was a serious look in his eyes. "Jyohaku-sama won't be fooled easily. I'm sure he's smart enough to see."

"Yeah he didn't take her donut," Kagome added helpfully.

Amari burst into a giggle, then huddled both of her friends close, squishing their cheeks together. "You guys are so cute! I'm so blessed to have friends like you."

"Um, on a serious note, the performance is in 3 months and we have no room for error. We really need to put our differences aside and focus on our best," Kagome said.

Kouhei gripped his fist. "I know you can do it! You almost got your steps! Let's have a celebration once this is all over!"

"Yes please!"

"Ah crap, its already late," he then said after glancing at his watch. "I'm going to miss my favourite anime on Tokyo TV."

Kagome spied at her own watch, then shot right up. "What! Holy sh—" Her friends stared at her and she quickly stopped. "I need to get home fast, or I won't have time to cook dinner!" Then she dashed off in a startling speed, leaving the shrine towards the _tori_ gate.

Kouhei whistled. "Wow, I didn't know she was such a good runner."

"Hmm, I thought she had a butler who cooks for her," Amari wondered aloud.

"She has a butler?!"

"Okay, let's see." Kagome swiped a lock of hair behind her ear as she glanced through the ingredients on her counter. She was still in her work clothes, her hair in a hasty bun, and in the Hello Kity apron that sadly, Sesshoumaru had now overlooked. Thank god she had marinated the beef overnight—that was going to cut out a lot of prep time for sure. She stirred the beef in its marinade just to even it out a bit, then poured it into a pan over medium heat.

Immediately the beef started to sizzle, and a delicious aroma wafted.

Quickly Kagome then reached for her knife and started slicing the onions. Waiting for their turn were some tomatoes and lettuce all for the salad.

"Oh dear!" Kagome suddenly remembered. "I put the _pita_ bread in the fridge last night and didn't take it out!" She knocked on own her head. "Why didn't I do that sooner!"

She quickly tossed the bread into the oven to heat it, then heard the beef sizzling harder. The aroma was stronger now, the spices tickling her nose. She rushed to the pan to stir the beef, saw her vegetables still waiting and quickly shifted her attention.

"Shit! The bread is burnt! Why didn't I check the temperature?! Shit shit shit!"

She pulled out the charred bread from the oven (the smell in the air was now a mixture of Middle Eastern spices and burnt bread) then threw in the remaining rest of the _pita_ , making sure the temperature was correct now.

"My beef!"

Outside, Sesshoumaru had just reached the door after another day's shooting. His keys jingled as he filched them from his pocket, and he entered the house. "I'm home," he said to no one in particular. Then his nose flared, and he looked up sharply. Taking slow, cautious steps, he made his way to the kitchen front. His head gingerly peeked through the _noren_ curtain.

"Sesshoumaru!" Kagome greeted him. "Welcome home!" Her face was moist with perspiration, her hair in a disarray as she wiped her hands on her apron. His eyes inspected around the kitchen.

"Was the kitchen on fire?" he asked carefully.

"I made dinner!" Kagome replied instead, pulling him in to sit at the table. "Remember I told you that I would make you some _shawarma_? Well I made some wraps!"

"You didn't have to go through such lengths," he said, as she placed two plates, one for each. Sesshoumaru who never even had a kebab in his life, didn't know what to expect. Looking at the way the lettuce and onions were spilling out from the wraps however, he could only deduce that she could have been a little less generous with them.

Kagome sat beside him. "I just wanted to do something for you once, you know. Like, reciprocate." She gave an unconvincing laugh. "Give and take, they always say!"

She seemed a little antsy, looking at him with wide expectant eyes. Sesshoumaru took his cutlery, cut a piece of the dish, and ate it. Kagome watched every part of his movements with great interest.

He chewed slowly. The beef was dry. Or perhaps it was meant to be dry? He wasn't a connoisseur of Middle Eastern cuisine, he wouldn't know.

"Well?" Kagome asked, and she was wringing her hands now.

"لذيذ ، لكن ما زلت تفضل دمك."

She gaped. "Are you speaking in Arabic?"

Excited by his interesting response, she immediately took a bite of her own food, chewing excitedly. After a few seconds however her face changed. She ran to the sink.

She had put too much spice mix in the beef, way too much. And she also had, obviously, overcooked it. So not only was the beef very dry, it was extremely bitter as well.

"It's disgusting!" she cried over the running water.

"Is it?" Sesshoumaru replied, steadily taking another bite.

"You're not just trying to be nice, are you?"

He seemed to ponder, then he shrugged. "...Perhaps."

Kagome turned back to the sink, a deep pout forming on her lips. He continued to eat until he finished his food, then wiped his mouth with a serviette. When he looked up, she was still standing there, quiet and despondent.

"Listen," he said. "Let's cook together tomorrow, shall we? We can make something that you like and you're satisfied with."

"No, that _you_ like."

"Alright, that we _both_ like."

She smiled at him, her face brightening up. Sesshoumaru nodded. He wished she was this agreeable all the time, although to be honest, it did not take much to make her happy.

Suddenly she said, "Oh, I can't be home for dinner tomorrow. I'm going out with Ichiro. I haven't met him in ages."

"What?" Sesshoumaru went, and he stood up and threw his cutlery.

"أسوأ شاورما تذوقتها!" he said harshly then strode from the kitchen.

"What, hey!" Kagome called after him. "Gosh I hate it when he does that. He didn't even tell me what his words meant." She picked up his empty plate. "Oh well, at least he finished eating his meal."

Later that night, while Kagome was busy needle-felting a small snake ("Take this, Hana!"), Sesshoumaru was at the backyard, collecting the dried laundry. He tossed her undergarments in the basket, then frowned as he looked at the empty hanging pegs.

He was sure there was more of them.

 _ **To be continued…**_

 _ **[A/N: In chapter 3 of Binded, Sesshoumaru said that he was able to "tap into any knowledge in the four corners of the world" to explain his sudden ability to make pancakes. Likewise he was able to speak in Arabic or any language, if he wanted to. With this logic however, he would then be well-versed in the cuisine, but I guess he just didn't want to go there… Anyway you guys are welcome to Google Translate what he exactly said. ;) ]**_


	21. Arc 3: First Transgression

**First Transgression**

Ichiro stopped just before he turned his key inside the lock. He briskly turned to face Kagome, his body braced against the door as if he wanted to block her way in.

He wore an apprehensive look, his eyes searching her face for words. Kagome waited, smiling with amusement. What was it now? There was always something up with him.

"Err, just before we go in," he said, his voice clearly stammering. "I would like to confess that I've never brought a girl home."

She laughed. "Well, and I've never been to a guy's apartment by myself. So that makes the two of us."

She saw as his anxiety diminished, replaced by a relieved smile. His set of lip piercings glinted faintly under the fluorescent lighting of the corridor.

"It's hella messy though, cos I've got books everywhere and stuff. You may have to tread wisely, like the path towards Mordor."

Kagome nodded knowingly. "Full of obstacles, you mean. I'm sure it can't be that bad. My house used to be filthy too, before Sesshoumaru moved in. He said it smelled like a pigsty."

"Ah, well." He turned and gave a flimsy smile, as he unlocked the door. "Just don't trip over anything."

Kagome stepped in after him. Before she knew it Ichiro had suddenly stopped to remove his shoes, and she stumbled into his back.

"Oh careful now. Just put your shoes at the side."

Kagome stared down at the _genkan_ in shock. She could barely fit inside the entrance, standing there with Ichiro. Her left shoulder brushed against the wall as she tottered unsteadily, gaining her bearings. She looked up sharply. This was one of those micro-apartments, wasn't it? She heard of them in the expensive, densely populated city of Tokyo, but never really been inside one.

Was it true what they said about such houses? Gingerly she stretched out her arms like a bird, feeling for the walls beside her. She needn't reach far—her fingers were already grazing them.

Ichiro who had walked further in, looked over his shoulder and watched her. He knew what was in her mind and he followed suit, touching the two adjacent walls with his hands. None of them spoke for awhile, just looking at each other, arms outstretched.

"Welcome home," Ichiro said, grinning. Kagome broke into laughter. "Welcome home!"

The apartment was solely a straight pathway starting from the tiny entrance. To the right a few doors opened revealing a compact closet, and further up, a toilet. The "bedroom" involved a trip up a ladder close to the ceiling, where a single bed spread out at a close corner.

Beside the toilet was a small stove and sink, which basically formed the kitchen. The balcony then spelled the end to this short corridor, fit for drying some laundry, or if one wanted the splendorous view of the facing apartment block. The balcony was then, Kagome figured, Mordor in essence. There wasn't really a common space or a living room. The whole pathway was your living room.

Ichiro didn't keep a lot of furniture. Kagome could count the number of items he had: a small table for eating, accompanied by a stool, a microwave and a small fridge. Some kitchen utensils. Maybe he had other things sorted out somewhere. As much as it appeared to hold minimal space, she was sure the apartment hid a secret compartment or two.

And books. He literally had books chucked at every corner she saw, and there weren't a lot of corners sadly. She almost kicked into a stack of magazines on the floor, which, when she squinted, were volumes of a science journal.

Kagome wasn't sure where to sit; she was standing rather awkwardly, her eyes darting around. That was when she spotted the ladder and the bed upstairs.

"I know it's cramped as hell," Ichiro spoke apologetically, as he filled the electric kettle over the sink. "But it's still much better than living with your parents. Just me, myself and I."

"Oh, don't bother yourself to make tea," she hurried after him. "I already had too much soda over dinner. Just a glass of water will do."

"Okay. I got some snacks in the fridge if you want some. I don't have anything heavier, though. I only eat instant noodles when I'm at home."

Kagome smiled. "Instant noodles, huh. I haven't had that in a long time. Sesshoumaru can't stand it and he won't allow it in the house. He says it isn't real food."

Ichiro shut the sink tap. "You know every time you speak, your thoughts always seem to revolve around him. It's like he's constantly in your mind." He gazed inside the kettle, the water sloshing about as it sought to gain a balance. "It's just the both of us here. Let's not talk about other people, alright."

The balcony door was ajar and the night breeze had slipped in, giving her arms a rise of prickled skin. He was right, there were just the two of them in that small, enclosed space. A thousand and one scenarios could unfold from it.

Ichiro was looking straight at her now. Kagome was forced to meet his penetrating gaze, his eyes large and intent, and then for some reason, she remembered an incident from many months ago, when her high-school friend had bumped into them both at the restaurant.

 _"He's the guy who disrupted our school musical, isn't he? The shrine-worker dude, or something."_

Kagome blinked a few times, trying to distort the image before her.

She heard Ichiro sigh defeatedly, a hand through his hair as he turned back towards the sink. "I'm sorry," he said after a while. "I didn't mean to put you in a position like that. I don't want you to think I'm a pushover."

"You're not," Kagome said, squeezing his shoulder. "You're one of the good guys. I know."

He gave a feeble smile. "That's sweet, but I want to be more than just one of the good guys, y'know."

Kagome smiled kindly in return, although her gaze had shifted. Something else interested her. There was a thick book on a shelf above the stove, and she reached up to grab it. Its cover was wrinkled with age and curled at the bottom corner, its many pages dog-eared. Her eyes glossed over the title.

 _Hyperspace: A Scientific Odyssey Through Parallel Universes, Time Warps, and the 10th Dimension by Michio Kaku_

Thinking about it, the stack of magazines had bore a similar subject, something about Einstein's universe, and Lorentzian wormholes.

Michio Kaku and wormholes. Wasn't he talking about this at Denny's at one time? Kagome thought it had been a one-off thing.

A cold dreadful feeling sunk into the pits of her stomach, but she smiled to hide it.

"You seem _really_ interested in time travel, don't you, Ichiro?" Kagome asked, although it wasn't a question. Her eyes stared at the bookcover, or rather, stared _through_ it.

"Yeah, my interest dates back a long time. I've been researching this thing for years now."

"Why, did something happen to you when you were a kid?"

He breathed out a laugh. "And why did you think anything happened to me at all?"

"Because something must have happened, for it to spur such a specific interest in you as a child."

He slid his hands into his pockets, seemed to hem and haw about it, then faced her. "You know, you're about the first person to ever speculate that something ever happened to me." There was a spark in his eyes. Something had awakened in him. "And you're right. Something _did_ occur. I was ten years old when I went on that school trip, at the Yamanote Memorial Hill."

I got lost in the woods and someone came to help me. Needless to say, after that, I was never the same."

The thrumming passed through the porcelain of her bathtub, each beat vibrating softly on her body. As usual Kagome had placed a disc on the phonograph before her bath, so she could feel the music reverberating through the floor and walls. It was meant to be therapeutic, but that effect was lost on her that night, as she lay submerged, frowning as she sipped a can.

The lights in the bathroom flickered. Kagome watched, perplexed, and just as it had stopped, the door suddenly opened. In reflex she pushed her can deep into her soap water.

"Are you drinking again?" Sesshoumaru said, his head poking in.

"You know, I swore I locked that door."

The door swung wider and he stepped in, stopping before her, his hand held out.

"Yay, points for privacy." Kagome affected to do a little clap but the can slipped off and floated to the surface, its contents spilling out for all to see.

"Give me," Sesshoumaru said. With the most annoyed look she could muster, she fished out the beer can and passed it to him. Straightaway, he hurled it into the trash bin.

"Dammit, Sessh. I really needed that."

"Why, your date gone wrong?"

"No, actually we kissed and we made out."

Sesshoumaru gave a derisive smile. "That's not what happened. I know, I watched you."

She almost shot up from her bath, then realized the mocking quality in his smile. "Sesshoumaru! That's not funny!"

"Hn. It's apparent we don't share the same sense of humour then."

"You're _evil_. Always have been. Now, why don't you come and help me wash my hair since you're already here."

His dark smile grew. "This evil Sesshoumaru is not in a position to refuse, is he?"

Sesshoumaru knelt close to the bath, and gently pulled on the rubber band securing her hair. Her hair unravelled instantly, like a dark flower bursting into bloom. He let its ends touch the water, tendrils floating on the surface, seemingly alive, shaping a spell into his senses.

Kagome sighed as the warm water from the showerhead touched her. It was so good. Just when she thought she had reached the peak of comfort, he started to massage the shampoo into her hair. Her head grew light as the soft fragrance wafted into her nose, just as her eyes grew heavy. Kagome stretched her back forward, bringing her knees up to her chest. She could just _sleep_ right now. The thrumming vibrations inside the tub seemed to conspire, lulling her into oblivion. Somewhere in a faraway place in the dark corner of her eyelids, a little boy got lost in the heart of the woods, crying.

"What is this scar on your back?"

Her eyes flew back open. Kagome jerked slightly. Did she fall asleep?

"What?" she said.

"This scar," Sesshoumaru repeated. He traced across her dampened skin, a spherical-like shape. She couldn't remember if she ever had a scar like that. Then again, she stopped counting a long time ago.

"They're my battle scars. You know, from last time. I have them all over my body. Some of them don't really disappear."

"Hmm," he said.

He continued to touch her scar. The rippled skin on her back tingled with a heightened sensitivity far from normal. Kagome stretched herself further, biting her lower lip, her throat taut. She breathed in a little deeper, and then, a little slower.

He knew, and she knew what he was doing. His finger was casual but purposeful, his strokes languid but learnt. Was there a higher plane of sensation than what she was feeling right now? There was, and it was his intention, to drive her there.

Her mind was teetering over an unseen edge. Close to the breadth of a single hair, she almost fell, almost died. Then his finger stopped, but it was just a cruel tease—it returned with all of his fingers, this time dragging down across the small expanse of her back, between her hips, her senses writhing in their wake.

Her back arched like a tightly coiled spring let loose. A gasp escaped from her, as a small burst of reiki sparked from every pore of her skin. When Sesshoumaru looked at her, she had already whirled around, her hand vice-tight against his. She stared into his soul, straight into its dark, deplorable recesses, her eyes stark with pure fright, shock, wonder and then, intrigue.

He couldn't answer even if he wanted to. Not when he had dared to push her over the edge.

The colour swarmed back into her eyes. Slowly Kagome pulled his hand down into the water, then turned back from him. Her body heaved with an indiscernible fatigue.

Her voice was hoarse and weary when she spoke, as if she had stormed through a thousand wars, picking up her scars, all within a blink of an eye.

"Can you wash all of me...Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru touched her through the water. Kagome didn't flinch.

"I thought you would never ask."

 ** _To_ _be continued..._**

 ** _A/N: Whew! Writing this was intense. It is currently 4:30am right now...hahaha. Sesshoumaru finally gets to give his miko a bath...but writing that would change the rating of the story, won't it?_**

 ** _Anyways, the dynamic in her relationships with Ichiro and Sesshoumaru is both taking a change. Wonder what's going to happen..._**


	22. Binded

A/N: Of which the rating changes to M. This chapter is a little long but it's worth it!

 **Binded**

 _The forest had gone deathly still; so still not even the crickets dared to ring. It was hard to believe that only a few moments ago the sky had shook and the ground had crumbled, the air piercing with the roar of a forest ogre._

 _Kagome was barely a week into Sengoku Jidai, after the wretched centipede-woman dragged her into this forsaken place. She had kept a brave front throughout her ordeals, witnessing first-hand in the savagery that only previously crowded in her grandfather's mythology books._

 _But tonight her spirit was faltered, smashed to pieces. The oni striked her, and the ground had caved in all around from its fearsome force._

 _When she opened her eyes, not only was she still alive, but the boy with the dog ears was there, looking at her. Inuyasha. That was what he said his name was._

 _"It's alright. It's dead. I killed it," he said._

 _Her hands reached out and gripped on him dearly like Death; latching, resolute. It felt like a protective shroud had fallen on her. She wouldn't trade it for anything else for._

 _It's alright, it's alright, it's alright._

 _The rough fibres of his haori were tickling her nose. They were stained by her salty tears._

 _"I've never been so scared." Kagome confessed. She tried to laugh it off. "I almost died there."_

 _Inuyasha placed his hand on her trembling back. He didn't intend to let it go._

 _"There's nothing to be scared of. You can always count on me for these things," he said, and his voice sounded strange even to himself; it was warm and comforting and he was never one of those things. He swallowed, and dared himself to say it. "I promise."_

 _Kagome nodded, stifling her tears. She hugged him for a little while longer until her fears dissipated, until he said "Okay, enough" and even then she still didn't let go. She had found her safe haven in this crazy monster-riddled world, and it was in him._

 _She would never trade him for anyone else._

* * *

It was one of those dark, bleary mornings made for sleeping through. The pitter-patter of cold rain, like static noise behind your deep obscure dreams. The occasional tap-tapping of the tree branches against the windowpane, soft but insistent. They all worked together to ensure you sank deeper into your bed, and forget all your responsibilities in the world.

That was why when Kagome woke up, late for work, she wasn't even mad. She continued to lay there, the air cool around her feet where the blanket had neglected her, and she stared at her clock as the minutes ticked by.

A while later, with a sloppy ham sandwich between her lips and a haphazard ponytail, Kagome pedalled her way to the Yukino Shrine in the drizzle.

She chained her bicycle at the foot of the _torii_ gate then ran for her life up the winding stairs. Before entering the shrine, she decided to rush through a slapdash version of the purification ritual. She was hastily scooping the water with the _hishaku_ dipper, when a large shadow cast over the water. Kagome's spirit fizzled a little.

"Higurashi. Office."

A defeated sigh dragged out from her lips. "Yes, Jyohaku-sama."

As usual there was a white Fortune Cat doll on Jyohaku's desk, or a _maneki-neko_. Its face was joyous, opposite to what she was feeling right now, and its paw was waving to and fro continuously. Kagome couldn't stop watching it.

Kagome slid her eyes to Jyohaku who was slouched back in his chair, watching her intently. His bulky figure appeared imposing, but his eyes were jaded, in fact they looked older than she last remembered. His silent manner was unnerving her. Shouldn't he already be shouting at her at this point?

His chair started creaking next as he rocked himself quietly in his chair, harbouring his dark thoughts. Kagome shut her eyes. The suspense was too much. At last she shot up from her seat and bowed her head down sharply.

"Jyohaku-sama please, if you have something to say, just blurt it out already! I can't take it when you're all quiet like that!"

He snorted then tapped his fingers on his desk impatiently. "Why don't you take a guess, Higurashi?"

"Alright, I know my punctuality is down in the pits. I'm trying to work on it, honest to god. Also, I haven't had my coffee yet, so even if you intend to nag at me, it will probably go in one ear and out the other..."

Jyohaku rolled his eyes. "You've been late since day one. No, I called you here for something far more important."

 _Something far more important?_ A horrible thought appeared. What if the priest had given up on her and had decided to fire her? What was she going to do then? She could just imagine Hana's face laughing manically with her plan succeeding.

The fortune cat continued to wave at her.

 _Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye!_ it seemed to say.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door and it slid open. "Good morning, Jyohaku-sama!" came a melodious, saccharine voice. The voice of a snake. Kagome wanted to barf right then. Hana was coming in with a spring in her steps, holding a cup of coffee.

"Oh goodie!" Kagome exclaimed. "Just in time! It's like you were listening to our conversation. I was just like telling Jyohaku-sama how I was in an urgent need for a coffee!"

Hana's face was a sheet of white as Kagome took the cup from her. She sipped it as daintily as she could. "Thank you so much, Hana-sama!"

"Hana, if you don't mind, please close the door when you leave," Jyohaku said gravely. "I need to have an important word with her."

Hana turned, her body visibly shaking. The door slammed hard after her. Kagome giggled, taking another sip of the hot coffee. Then she looked up. "Ah. You were saying?"

"Higurashi, I'm just going to be straight to the point," Jyohaku sighed, rubbing his face. Kagome steeled herself for the worst, holding her coffee tightly. "To be honest, I'm terribly disappointed in you."

Jyohaku pulled out his drawer, then suddenly slapped a letter envelope down on the table. That was it. The letter of termination. Kagome felt the room spin.

"I'm dismayed looking at your examination results!"

The room kept spinning, albeit a little slower. "I...I failed?" Kagome stood up slowly, staring at the letter that must have beheld her results. The priest was talking about the theory examination she just took last summer, which would more or less dictate her prospect of being a fully ordained priestess. She had burnt the midnight oil for that, and thought she did fairly well for the exam.

"You passed!" Jyohaku said. "But you could have done _better_!"

Kagome sank back in her chair, gripping the armrests and she reeled with relief. "No, you and your bloody high expectations!" she then snapped.

"No, don't give me that bull, Higurashi. I've always known you as a 110, not a 75!"

"75?" Kagome gasped with happiness. "I got a 75?"

Jyohaku didn't seem to share her joy. He reclined sharply in his chair, arms crossed tightly, his lips a tight line. "Well, what is it?" he said testily.

"What, what?"

"What has you so _distracted_ nowadays?" he said. "Wait, don't answer me. It must be because..."

"Because of the spirit I sired," Kagome finished for him. She rolled her eyes. "Yada yada yada. I've heard everything."

"I don't think you comprehend the gravity of your situation, Higurashi. Don't you see this is precisely how the devil works? To lure you away from the path towards righteousness?"

"Hah. On the contrary—I believe scoring 75 on the exam is already a clear indicator I'm on the right track."

Jyohaku stood up and clasped his hands behind his back as he always did, and walked out from his desk slowly.

"A theory exam is only what it is—to test your theory knowledge. It doesn't mean you're still ready to graduate from your apprenticeship. Your overall attitude still plays a great part in whether or not you're deemed suitable to be a ranked _miko_ of this shrine."

"I've proved myself all these years, haven't I?" Kagome asserted. "You know I'm fully capable."

"That is true, but only until recently. I feel like your dedication has somewhat dwindled, Higurashi."

His words struck her hard. Kagome couldn't imagine herself being _less dedicated_ to the shrine; it had been her second home for the last 5 years.

And yet, a pang of guilt was starting to consume her. What the priest said was partly true, because he must have observed her. The way she rushed through things now, the way she was giving a little less of herself in her duties. Everyday when she was at work, she was internally wishing to make the day pass faster. She couldn't wait to close the shrine in the evenings so she could rush home.

And all because...

So she could see _him_...

Kagome bit her lower lip, her fist slowly gripping on her lap.

"I'm still the same young woman you took under your wing, Jyohaku-sama," she said, wanting to convince him, but mostly, to convince herself. "Your very first apprentice. Thanks to you, I've grown so much here in this shrine, and I've lasted the longest among everyone else. Do you really think I would want to throw away everything, just like that?"

He pinched the corner of his eyes and sighed.

"I just hope you're right, Higurashi," he said, leaning against his table. "And for that, I'm going to give you a second chance to prove _me_ that _I_ made the right decision to accept you under my tutelage."

Kagome watched him, waiting for his next words.

"Guess what? Your dance performance is coming up in a few weeks, and the shrine committee will be coming as part of our guests." Jyohaku smiled at her, like a crocodile grinning at a mousedeer on the river's edge. "Can you imagine that? So it won't be just me you'll have to impress."

Outside along the hallway, Kouhei and Amari were passing by the priest's office.

"Hey Amari, wanna hear a joke?" Kouhei winked.

"Oh, do tell!" Amari said, clapping in excitement.

"What do you call a priest who's also a lawyer?"

Amari beamed. "Ah! I know that one. A father in law."

"Oh, darn it!" They both started doubling in laughter. Then Kouhei said, "Hey, isn't that Hana? What's she doing, pressing herself outside the office door?"

The pair watched as the door slid open suddenly, and Hana, who had been clearly eavesdropping, fell to the floor with a loud "oof!". Realising her blunder, she looked up tearfully, only to discover all four pairs of eyes on her.

She covered her face and screamed.

* * *

The little zashiki warishi took form of a little girl, her face always vague in the shadows, her laugh tinkling at the edge of dreams. Kagome didn't know much about it, except that it supposedly brought good luck to the house, and that it was taboo to speak of it, lest it heard and leave forever. But before that it would whisper a curse into the household, making sure they would break under misfortune. Or at least, that's what Sesshoumaru said.

Kagome pretended not to see the zashiki warashi, who was creeping behind a wall, playing a game of hide-and-seek. She was peeling oranges at the low kotatsu table, her legs tucked under a heated quilt.

And although her fingers worked, her eyes were glazed over, registering nothing. She had sunk into her own realm of thoughts, and it was always a storm. Kagome, but not Kagome, he would say. Sesshoumaru had caught her so many times, lost in reverie.

A door opened and shut somewhere, followed by a shuffle of footsteps. Sesshoumaru appeared into the living room in a pair of pajamas that matched hers. His hair tumbled down his shoulders, freshly-washed and damp. He smelled of her Herbal Essences shampoo.

He looked at her, mildly curious.

"Winter may be near, but it's a little early to be eating _mikan_ oranges over the _kotatsu_ table, no?"

"I'm cold," Kagome said, popping a piece of orange into her mouth. Sesshoumaru observed her for awhile, then went on to sit behind her. He wrapped his arms around her body.

Normally Kagome would have jumped out of her skin, and elbowed his face in reflex—but it was wise to say now that after living together for a long period, she had gotten quite used to his antics.

She rubbed his arm affectionately. "What are you doing?" she asked. She already knew his answer, but she just wanted to say something. The house was awfully quiet, and she had been sitting alone by herself at the table, eating her oranges. The creeping zashiki warishi notwithstanding.

"Warming you up," he said simply. Kagome realized she had peeled too many. She asked if he wanted some, but he shook his head. Then they both steeped into their own silence; Kagome and her oranges, while Sesshoumaru rested his head on her, deep in his own thoughts.

She sighed at last. At that point she almost wanted to cry.

It wasn't fair, wasn't it, what happened at work this morning? The gods knew how much she wanted to succeed as an apprentice. She had worked so hard, lost so much time. She made the decision to leave her hometown, her family, everything, just so she could settle here and focus. But it was still never enough. She was never, ever, going to be a good _miko_. Not to the priest, not to herself.

Yes, she did bad things. Un- _holy_ things. Things a proper _miko_ shouldn't do. Like pulling people back up from the dead. Like getting bound to a demon. But she had her reasons doing so at that time. Reasons of which were now blurry, like the tears in her eyes right now.

Let Inari-okami punish her if she had transgressed. Jyohaku had no right to think lesser of her.

"It's not fair!" she suddenly cried out. She slammed her head down onto the tabletop. "It's not fair, it's not fair, it's not fair-"

"Miko, why are you banging your head on the table?"

"It's not fair, it's not fair, it's not fair..."

" _Miko_." Sesshoumaru quickly placed his fingers onto her forehead. "Kagome, _stop_ ."

Of which Kagome stubbornly swung her head down, and ended up smashing his fingers. Sesshoumaru recoiled. He turned his back to her quietly, grasping his hand.

Kagome gaped. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" She grabbed his hands, stroked them, and kissed his fingers softly. "I'm so sorry, I really am."

She peered up, saw the way he was looking at his own hands in hers. "Oh," she said quickly. "My mom always told me to kiss it where it hurts."

"I see," Sesshoumaru said. Then he leaned forward, and he kissed her gently on her forehead. He looked into her face, wiped her tears away. She was crying a lot lately.

"Your heart tells me it's hurting too."

"I'm just having a bad day at work," Kagome sniffled. She looked up to him and tried to smile. "Tell me, Sesshoumaru. Do you think I'll ever be a good miko?"

"Is that your heartfelt wish?"

She closed her eyes and sighed. "Yes."

"Then good things shall await for you." He kissed her dribbling nose. "For now, you'll just be a curious, little _miko_."

She scrunched up her nose. "Curious, curious, curious. That's the word you always use. Guess what, there's nothing interesting enough about me for you to be _curious_ about."

"Oh, that's you think." A small smile curved the edge of his lips. "I've never seen a more curious creature than you in my whole life."

"But that's not what you thought of five hundred years ago, wasn't it?"

His smile grew. "And how would you know?" Sesshoumaru said. "How would you know what was on my mind five hundred years ago when I first laid my eyes upon you?"

He leaned down. Something flickered past his eyes, like a small bolt of lightning. Kagome staggered, and she let herself fall onto the tatami-matted floor.

"Stop teasing me," she whispered between heavy breaths. "You're always, _always_ teasing me."

"No, _you_ stop teasing me, Kagome Higurashi," he hissed softly against her lips. "Your wild emotions, constantly rippling inside me, rampant, echoing your every worry, your sorrow, your joys. The way your scent changes like the seasons—the burst of sunflower pollen, and then dark water, trickling off moss-covered rocks—carving your name into my senses."

Kagome watched his face. There was fire, alive and dancing in his eyes, a little, amber flame that was orchestrating the swarming heat in her chest.

He's really is the devil, isn't he, her thoughts ran. And I'm probably going to hell after this.

"Do you want to know what you smell like, Sesshoumaru? Or at least how it affects me?" She caressed down the side of his face, stroked his lips with her thumb. She felt the sharp point of his teeth.

"It makes me want to shed my blood for you, _every single time_.

Sesshoumaru gave a quiet growl. His eyes followed her fingers as she unbuttoned the top of her pajamas.

"Didn't you say my heart was hurting?" She took his hand, placed it on her chest.

"Promise that you will not push me back," he said apprehensively.

"If our souls are bound to each other, what more of our bodies?" She smiled at him. "Do with me what you will."

"No," Sesshoumaru said. His eyebrows knitted in a delicate manner. "Shouldn't it be "binded to each other" instead?"

"No silly, I'm positive it's "bound".

"Binded!"

Kagome rolled her eyes. "Okay," _binded_ ". You win."

He gave a triumphant smile. Then his head dipped and his lips met with her skin, tremulous, tender.

Kagome's heart shuddered as his teeth broke into her skin. But it was going to feel good. It was always like that, no matter what. Then his hand moved, and it became a different good, _sinfully_ good, waves crashing upon her kind of good, and he pushed her over the edge again, like he did in her bath, and this time she really fell a thousand times, and died a thousand deaths.

She wouldn't trade him for anyone else.

 ** _To be continued..._**

 **A/N: I guess that's it, that's no turning back now... (turn back from what?)  
To be honest I felt quite sad writing Kagome's memory with Inuyasha at the start of this chapter. Those emotions you felt, and the promises you uttered at the height of your passion for a love that did not end well. And again it repeats when you meet someone new. So did those words mean anything at that time? If so, why could they easily be replicated?**

 **I'm going through this myself, having finally met my soulmate, but it came at the expense of having to throw what I currently had at that time (of which I know that person would never forgive me), and I'm still feeling guilty over it.**

 **Anyway I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**


	23. Final Trangression

**A/N: There is going to be sexual content in this chapter, but seeing how far Sess and Kagome's characters have developed, it will not be a gratuitous scene. I did not intend for it to be crude and explicit. Also it will be quite dark.**

 **Final Transgression**

Amari held the tickets high up against the sky. She frowned at them. They had been commissioned by the shrine committee, one of many gifts after their amazing dance performance last weekend. What a night that had been. Kagome and Amari had invited their families to watch. Even Kagome's mysterious butler, Sesshoumaru had been there to witness the event.

Amari knew their hard efforts had paid off when she saw the priest nod and smile at the end of their performance.

"Four tickets," she said. "Four tickets, whatever we'll do with them?"

"What we'll do?" Kagome replied beside her at the bench. They were having their lunch at the shrine garden. "We'll have a group vacation of course!" She sighed happily. "A trip to a hot spring in winter. Ah, it's the vacation I long needed."

She continued to slurp on her _miso_ soup before a thought came to her. "Hey Amari, I'll prolly ask Sesshoumaru to come along. How about you?"

Amari poked her noodles. "There's no way that person will come, won't he?"

Kagome looked at her friend. "How about Kouhei?" she said. "We did promise we'll celebrate together, didn't we?"

It never occurred to her. Amari looked back in surprise. "Kouhei?"

* * *

Sesshoumaru tipped the bottle to his lips, drinking all of the water left inside. He swallowed.

"An onsen vacation at a villa?" he repeated.

"Yes! I'll be going with two of my colleagues, " Kagome said. "Please tell me you'll go."

The snow had just fell yesterday, the cold morning air bracing in their lungs. The both of them had taken their bicycles out to ride up a nearby hill. They cycled for an hour before Kagome asked for a break, her face flushed in red. A lone vending machine stood at the spot, and a wooden bench at the railed edge that overlooked the view of the whole town.

It was probably dangerous, riding up there in the slippery snow. They had been meaning to do it for some time, with the plan constantly being put off. And now it was winter.

"As long as it doesn't clash with my work schedule," Sesshoumaru said simply.

Kagome laughed white puffs in the air. She wore an old red turtleneck sweater her mom had knitted for her, with a K embroided in the front. "I understand. You're a famous model now. Just don't forget me when you're strutting on that catwalk."

Sesshoumaru frowned. "I don't strut."

"Sure you do." Kagome got up from the bench and tried to do an exaggerated catwalk in front of him. "Like this."

She moved like an ambitious monkey. Sesshoumaru smiled and pulled her back to the bench, where she was taken to his lap. She sat against him and giggled when he circled his arms around her waist.

She was happy. And she deserved to be. She was on her way to becoming a fully-ordained _miko_ , which was her a lifelong dream.

A small smile flicked to Sesshoumaru's lips. He was there when she executed the Kagura dance. She had swayed with the grace of a swan, her slow movements intensely hypnotic, the ringing bells, the meandering swirl of her _reiki_ filling the shrine, grabbing him by his throat. She was that breath-taking.

He was caught transfixed in his seat, and in that moment, if she had summoned for him his very soul, he would have gladly offered it to her.

Afterwards, after the performance, she had shyly introduced him to her mother and brother who attended. They had responded to him with confused, but friendly smiles. The supermarket boy was there as well for his sister. He watched Kagome's family from afar so wistfully that Sesshoumaru gave him a smile in passing, as if to say, "I win."

"Hold on," Sesshoumaru said, returning to the present. His smile was gone. "Did you say it was a new villa at Kiba?"

A silence filled between them. Why didn't she realized it sooner? Kagome was sure they were a lot of villas in Kiba. But something told her it had to be _that_ particular one that was under construction two years ago. In other words the same place where Kagome was called for an exorcism. The place where everything started.

"Gosh," she stammered. "I didn't think about that. It's the same one, isn't it?" She turned, and tried to see his face but he looked away. "You know, you don't have to go if you don't want to."

"No, I want to," he said quietly. "I haven't been there for a long time."

Kagome smiled, trying to cast away the bad feeling. "Okay," she said. She clasped his gloved hands in hers. "Tell me which dates you're free. I want us to have a good time."

* * *

Kagome rented a car to the villa, finally perusing her driving liscense she obtained years ago. After about two hours of driving through light snowfall, they finally reached.

The surroundings were different from what she remembered. It was no longer a thick forested area in the middle of nowhere. They had really chopped away a good amount of trees for the place. Switching off her engine, she sighed, smiling.

"Well, this is it," Kagome said.

"This is it," Amari followed.

"This is it!" Kouhei cheered.

Everyone looked at Sesshoumaru. He twisted his mouth.

"This is it," he muttered.

The propiertor greeted them at the entrance. Turns out the villa was one of the properties belonging to the affluent shrine committee.

They walked into the warm, wooden interiors slowly, trying to curb their excitement.

"Is that Kagome-sama's boyfriend?" Kouhei whispered to Amari behind them. "He's terrifyingly good-looking."

"Sesshoumaru-san used to be a popular cosplay model, but now he shoots for luxury brands," Amari informed. Kouhei gasped, but that wasn't the best part. "He's also...Kagome's butler."

"No way!" He covered his mouth, eyeing the couple with disbelief and new-found admiration. "Fancy having that kind of guy at your feet. Can you imagine if they fall in love?"

The propiertor showed them to the rooms, one for each. Kagome unpacked her bag for the short two-day stay and changed into the kimono provided. She laid out the _futon_ in the middle of the spacious room and laid spread-eagle on it for awhile. She stared at the ceiling as she collected her breaths, thinking but not really thinking.

Then she scrambled out of bed and sneakily opened her door. There was no one at the corridor. She hopped stealthily towards Sesshoumaru's room.

"Good evening," the propiertor greeted her suddenly at the corridor end, bowing.

Kagome bowed back. "Good evening! I'm just going to see uh, what my friend is up to..." And she slipped towards Amari's room instead.

Amari invited her inside once she opened the door.

"It's still an hour before dinner," Kagome said.

Her friend pointed to her _futon_. "Ah, why don't you sit there and let me braid your hair?"

Kagome sat down and Amari started combing down her back. "Oh goodie. You're like the sister I never had, Amari-chan. Maybe you should call me Kagome nee-san from now on."

Amari giggled. "You're too funny, Kagome-sama." She ran her fingers down the long dark tresses. Amari had always kept her own short, as she didn't think she could pull a look otherwise. "Can I ask you something though? How are you and my brother doing?"

Kagome opened her mouth, trying to think of a good way to break it down gently. "He's a great guy. He really is."

"But you don't like him, don't you?"

"We're good friends right now," Kagome said carefully, "but I don't think that's going to change."

"Kagome-sama, you know you can just tell me." Amari paused. "You're having an affair with Sesshoumaru-san, aren't you?"

Kagome whirled around, the comb stuck in her hair. "H-how did you get that?" _Dammit, and I thought I was all cautious about it_ , she thought.

Amari smiled and retrieved the comb. "Well you told me he became your butler in exchange for shelter, right? But he's a successful model now who's capable of living on his own. And yet, you guys are still staying together. I mean, I may be wrong..."

 _Gosh, I never thought about that. I wouldn't call it an affair though. More like a blasphemous union, maybe._

"You're so lucky, you know that, Kagome-sama. I'm happy as long you're happy."

"Oh Amari-chan, if only you knew."

Someone was knocking on her door wildly. "Amari! It's Kouhei!" The young man came with a DVD gripped excitedly in his hand.

"Let's watch a movie while waiting for dinner!" he said. Then he peered behind her, blushing slightly. "Eh, Kagome-sama, you're here too."

No one knew Kouhei had a penchant for classic horror movies. They winced in disgust in the dark room as 'Creature from the Black Lagoon' played—the black and white film blaring out with feminine screams and monstrous webbed feet.

Amari too was screaming in Kouhei's shoulder.

"Why did you play this, of all the movies?" Kagome glared at Kouhei. Then she felt Sesshoumaru's hand briefly touched her, even though there wasn't a flick of emotion on his face.

They had a large spread for dinner afterwards. Amari and Kouhei were still eating, even though their bellies were already full of saké and sashimi, when Sesshoumaru lightly tapped her shoulder.

" _Miko_. I'm going outside for awhile."

It took Kagome a while to register. "Oh," she said. She looked up at him frantically. "Do you want me to—"

"No, it's alright. Stay here and finish your meal."

Then he disappeared through the door. Kagome was left staring at her food. She knew where he was going. He was going to visit the old bridge, or what it had become of now.

Sesshoumaru never disclosed to her his past. Even at this stage where they were so close. Sometimes she was insanely curious and wanted to demand it from him. Sometimes she thought it was none of her business, and that everyone had secrets to bury.

Either way she wished the past didn't have to catch up to him right now. She knew his heart had been heavy on the way here, and his face had turned grim when he saw the villa. He must have thought how much they had descreated the place his spirit was once attached to.

And why, she never knew. She would never know what happened at the bridge.

Maybe it's for my own good, Kagome thought as she slipped into the onsen later afterwards, clad in a short towel. She had her hair braided in a bun by Amari before dinner, and her stomach felt so heavy now, as she sat gingerly in the hot pool. Kagome sighed, as the water slowly lapped away her fatigue.

Sesshoumaru's shoes padded against the snow. He was facing a large backyard garden. A large cedar tree, frosted and stiff, overlooked the bridge crossing over a running pond. The bridge was made of wood, not of stone like it was supposed to be. There was nothing there that was supposed to be. Not even the cedar tree.

And yet it was. Everything was immaculately arranged in the garden. The stone lanterns. The shrubs of red lily lining the pond's edge. The echoing thud of the _shishi-odishi_ fountain. He figured in a few months' time, the garden would reflect what it wanted to be—bright, hopeful, exuberant.

He walked to the bridge and placed his hand on the railing. He wiped the snow off. Its surface felt cold and hollow. He waited for something to call out to him, within that wood, but it never did. Sesshoumaru remained rooted to the spot and waited. Nothing came.

The _shishi-odishi_ thudded again. It was watchful, ominous. As if it _knew_.

 _What are you waiting for, Sesshoumaru? You know she's not coming. You denied her the cicada's death. You cast her in stone...remember?_

He removed his hand. The snowflakes landed softly where he just touched, melting in his heat. Then his cheeks suddenly felt wet, and little drops ran down his face, and they too fell against the wood, and after awhile he no longer knew if it was really snow or his tears.

It was such a strange sensation. Because he never cried for anything, or anyone. Not even when he had built that stone bridge and buried her body underneath it. Her eyes had been full of tears then, his solemn face the last thing she saw. No, he had pursed his lips tightly, keeping his face so still not even his heart moved.

Kagome looked up. She watched in surprise as Sesshoumaru walked quietly towards the onsen. He was without a shred of clothing.

She stirred as he waded into the pool, his long legs entering the water slowly.

"You know you're not supposed to be naked in an onsen."

He was silent. Suspiciously silent. Even when he crouched to sit beside her. Did something happened when he went outside?

She turned to look at him, and he pulled her wordlessly, into his lap, like he did on that morning on the hill. Except his grip on her arm now was anything but gentle. Kagome felt suddenly a chill in her bones.

"What's wrong?" she asked. He didn't answer. "Sesshoumaru."

She grasped his face with both hands, forcing him to look at her. His eyes were glazed and wet. Her heart skipped a beat. She couldn't recognise him. She froze as his cold hands wandered restlessly down her body.

"Let me feel your heart beating on my skin," he said, his voice hoarse with need. He brought down her face to meet his, their foreheads touching.

"Your breath against mine." He pulled her down further. Sesshoumaru kissed her.

Kagome's face stilled, her fingers slowly gripping his shoulders. Then she parted her lips for him. His kiss turned fervent, his grip unyielding. Her heart raced against his skin.

Kagome was lost. Inside the hot spring, she felt like she was on fire. Even his hands, adventurous and bold, exploring every secret place in her body, no longer felt as cold.

He ran down his palm down her abdomen, his claws lightly scratching below her stomach. Kagome whimpered against his mouth, as a shot of arousal jolted her. Her hips rocked in reflex, grinding against him. And then she felt it in the water, his hardness, ready and poised near her entrance.

His tip rubbed against her three times. Kagome looked at his eyes, staring wildly in hers—no longer glazed but feral, alight with desire for her. It felt like the world had stopped spinning for that very moment.

"My body inside you," he rasped, his eyes never leaving hers.

He entered her. Her reiki flared, searing his skin in its white-hot intensity. And then she felt something that made her insides shrink, and the marrow in her bones thin, a resistance quelling her—the sharp spike of _youki_. It danced in her blood like tongues of flame, flickering on its surface.

He moved slowly, their auras mingling, tasting each other. Her tears begin to spill, her body latching to him desperately.

"Kagome. You asked me once what I was doing at that bridge. And I told you that I was waiting."

He withdrew swiftly, only to slip in again slowly.

"I was waiting for someone. But in truth, she had already came." His hand wiped her dripping tears. His body never stopped moving, swiftly, and then slowly, again and again.

"She was crying, begging me to save her from them. She had never begged before."

Kagome bit her lip. She tried to think about the way their bodies were joined as one, how he was gradually making her feel dizzy with pleasure, until she was moving against him, trying to seek her own completion.

"I obliged, so she would not have to suffer any longer."

The water sloshed and splashed around their bodies.

"You killed her, didn't you?" she spoke through clenched teeth. "And they in turn killed you."

"I gave her mercy. There was no resistance."

"You killed Rin."

Sesshoumaru hushed her with a thumb on her lips. "No, don't say that name. She is dead now. The dead always stay nameless." He cupped her face. "But you...you're alive. Your flesh is warm, and I can hear your blood coursing through your veins."

He removed her arms around his neck then locked them down between their bodies. His thrusts became more urgent, demanding. And she was so slick, receiving him warmly.

"Give yourself to me, Kagome." He neared her lips. "Show me that you belong to me."

He kissed her again, and she felt it this time, her soul as it left her lips and fused into his, _reiki_ and _youki_ convalescing, their hearts pounding on a single beat, as the edges of the world became dark, the creak of a door closing shut behind them.

* * *

There was a knock outside her room. It was Amari.

"Kagome-sama, Kouhei is asking if you wanna watch the rest of the movie."

Kagome smiled and shook her head. You go on, Amari. I'm going to have an early night."

"Oh," Amari said, surprised. "You have a good rest then. Goodnight, Kagome-sama."

"Amari-chan?" Kagome called her.

Amari turned at the corridor. "Yes?"

"You're right," Kagome said. "I am with Sesshoumaru."

Her friend broke into a smile. "I knew it! You just had that glow on your face."

Kagome breathed out a laugh. "Well, don't let Kouhei wait for you."

She watched Amari's retreating back as she walked deeper into the corridor. Sweet, innocent Amari.

Then she closed the door and looked over her shoulder. Sesshoumaru was standing by the windows, looking outside, as the snow drizzled harder.

It was going to be a long and cold night.

 _To be continued..._

 **A/N: Huhuhu so glad I managed to get this chapter out. I'm not sure if anyone had guessed Rin's ending that way, but it had been in my mind when I first set out this story. Tell me what you think of the development of this fic so far, or if you have any suggestions. =)**


	24. Chances Are

**Chances Are**

 _"Sakura, sakura..."_

 _Miroku was singing a folk song, as his fingers plucked on the shamisen. Beside him, Sango sat on the picnic mat, clapping along, with Kirara nestled in her lap._

 _It was no longer spring in Sengoku Jidai. In actuality, it was almost the end of August, with autumn encroaching. Kagome sifted through her belongings in her backpack. The zipline was faulty from the constant yanking, and the seams were stretched taut. Anytime now its belly was going to burst open, and then she would go home, passing the defeated bag in shame, and her mom would sigh and say, "You really need to learn stitching."_

 _Stitching was far from her mind now. Her throat was parched after the four-hour trail towards Naraku's nest. She almost cried with relief when Rin suggested innocuously that they take a breather. Her lord didn't look entirely pleased, then again he seldom looked like anything._

 _Kagome was sure, given a choice, their group would have travelled at their own pace, but seeing they were inches to Naraku, it was wiser to stick together._

 _Her flask peeked out among the smorgasbord of items, and she pulled it out with the vigor of the impatient. It was empty. She looked around at the others. Her eyes skimmed past Sango and the priest. No need to bother them surely. Shippo was teaching Rin a game of Tic-Tac-Toe in the sand as Jaken watched on derisively. Their lord was nowhere to be seen._

 _And Inuyasha. Kagome looked up, and spotted his leg dangling from a branch of the massive, thick-trunked pawlonia tree that shaded them. He was dead asleep in an afternoon nap, and his snores were so obnoxious that it was drowning out Miroku's singing, and she wondered if she could really live with them._

 _Standing up, Kagome decided that she would refill her flask herself._

 _The little stream of river ran through the woods in a winding trail. Earlier on they had trekked alongside it for awhile, before it quirked towards another direction and got lost in the dense thickets. Kagome walked back towards it._

 _As she approached, she realised how deep the brook really was; the river water rushed rapidly and bubbled among the rocks. That, plus the increasing weight of youki settling in the atmosphere. Quiet and subdued, her guts tightened in reflex to the malevolent charge lurking underneath, like a trickle of electricity buzzing in the air._

 _It had a distinct flavour in her throat, like smoke. Kagome knew who it was. Still her eyes roved around nervously around her surroundings, among the dappled flurry of greens and browns and splashes of orange. At last she saw him._

 _Sesshoumaru appeared the same as usual, although it felt like the first time each time her eyes cast upon him. He was but a suppressed beast in a humanoid form, shrouded with soft silk, braced with shiny steel._

 _His pale translucent skin did not radiate warmth and his eyes were opaque, joyless. An otherworldly beauty clung to his bones like a protective layer, as if to cover the monstrosity beneath. And yet there was a perfection that tied everything together, as cold and superficial as it was. A seamlessness that served to unsettle her each time her eyes chanced upon him._

 _Sesshoumaru did not look at her, instead appeared to be occupied with watching the river flow. Kagome could never hold her gaze for too long. It was like looking at something forbidden, something that should not have existed in the first place. It was like looking at a ghost._

 _Kagome treaded to the edge of the stream slowly, where clusters of spider lilies grew in abandon. He probably was already aware she was there, but it still paid to act inconspicuously._

 _She dunked her flask in the water, making sure it flowed in through its mouth. Then her flask began to fill with a hollow sound that pierced the silence, and she almost grimaced._

 _Kagome shook her head and cleared her throat. Damn this awkwardness. They were allies now, like it or not._

 _"Hello. Have you heard of the legend of the red spider lily?"_

 _She heard his hair rustle against his clothes. And then,_

 _"What legend?"_

 _She felt a rush of goosebumps when he spoke. He was interested. Good gods, the youkai Lord of the West was interested in conversation with her._

 _"Um, you know, the one where if you meet someone along a pathway of lilies, there's a chance you'll never see them again?"_

 _Kagome swore she heard Sesshoumaru laugh—a short, deep expulsion that escaped from his throat. Her goosebumps hardened. The flask was heavy in her hand, full of water. Still, she didn't move._

 _"A frivolous sentiment," he said. His voice was lazy and deliberate. In her head, Kagome imagined thick jam, being spread on bread._

 _"Well, it's up to you to believe. It's just a legend, after all," Kagome replied briskly. She stood up and capped shut her flask. Why did she even bother opening her mouth? She turned to leave._

 _"And if we go along with that sentiment, I suppose this may be our last meeting."_

 _Kagome stilled and stared at him. Her eyes lowered to his lithe fingers, curled around the stalk of a red lily. The thin crimson petals contrasted vulgarly against the paleness of his skin. Kagome was distracted for a moment, to see if he would pluck it._

 _When she blinked, she realized the magnanimity of his words. If this was their last meeting here, with Naraku so close, would that mean one of them would soon be..._

 _"I hope not," Kagome said, grabbing her flask tightly. "I hope we do meet each other again, after everything. I...I pray for it."_

 _Sesshoumaru tilted his face just slightly. He looked at her. Kagome saw the bright reflection of the river, waving on his otherwise placid face. For some reason, his sharp eyes made her heart pound._

 _"I admire your optimism," Sesshoumaru then said. "May the gods hear your prayer."_

 _The lily came away with his hand. Kagome watched, entranced, as he seemed to grace it with a fleeting gaze. As then just as quick, his hand flicked, and the lily flew into an arc in the air, falling to the surface of the river, where it was carried away, stolen by the current._

* * *

There was a croaking sound, akin to a frog's when he pushed the door into the florist. Sesshoumaru thought it was odd that of all the things, one would use that as a door chime. When his eyes wandered across the expanse of the whole store however, filled with vases of various flowers and fronds and wood ornaments, their colours and scents creating a small explosion in his head, he decided to retract his opinion. A frog was very much ideal.

He strode to the counter, a hand in his coat.

"Good afternoon. I would like a customized bouquet, please."

The florist, a twentyish young woman, was busy writing an invoice. Nevertheless, she looked up and smiled.

"Good afternoon. Sure, sir. Is there a particularly special occasion?"

He rubbed his jaw, and seemed to hem and haw for a moment.

"An anniversary," he told her at last.

"Ah, how sweet." The lady walked around the counter, to a rotating shelf of freshly cut flowers.

"We just had a batch of stargazer lilies that arrived this morning. Does your partner like lilies?"

She saw the subtle shift of emotion on Sesshoumaru's face.

The lady hesitated. "I'm just saying, some people don't really like the smell of lilies."

"No." And he reiterated. "No lilies."

* * *

The three apprentices walked down the long flight of cobbled steps of Yukino-jingu after a day's work. For some reason Kouhei glanced over his shoulder, then elbowed Kagome beside him.

"Hana-sama is at it again."

The two _miko_ turned to look, then regretted instantly. Jyohaku and Hana were descending the stairs as well, with the latter latching to the priest in the most coquettish manner. It was like watching a pair of peacocks in a courting display, but with their genders switched. A further observation would definitely induce vomiting.

"Don't look at them, Amari-chan," Kagome said lightly.

Amari's face was bleak. She hung her head. "Why must she do those kind of things?" She sighed despondently. "I'll never understand. She doesn't even like him properly."

Kagome shrugged. "Well, there's always all sorts of people. That's how you make the world colourful, right? But yeah, what I would do to make her trip and roll down the stairs!"

"Kagome-sama, that's mean!"

Kagome and Kouhei laughed.

They nearly reached the foot of the stairs. A familiar sensation suddenly overcame her, causing her heartbeat to quicken. She looked up. Down by the _torii_ gate, was Sesshoumaru waiting for her.

She skipped down the stairs breathlessly.

"Sesshoumaru," she called.

" _Miko_."

They met face to face. Sesshoumaru looked especially handsome in a coat she had never seen before. She could smell expensive perfume. Kagome couldn't hide her elated smile.

"I thought you were busy with work."

"Call me impatient, but I have something that might surprise you. Also," Sesshoumaru said, and his arm came forward from his back, a large bouquet greeting her astounded eyes, "Here is a little something for starters."

Kagome was speechless. Slowly she accepted it, awed by the lone sunflower blooming brightly amidst the gorgeous gathering of orange roses, white baby's breath, bleeding hearts and lavender.

Behind her Amari gasped in surprise, covering her mouth. "How romantic!" she gushed.

"I made plans for dinner as well," Sesshoumaru continued, taking her hand, weak with shock.

"But I'm still in my shrine attire."

Sesshoumaru raised a paper bag from nowhere. "Worry not. I have you covered."

"And he's so prepared too!"

Kouhei whistled. "There you go. The perks of dating your own butler."

"What's this commotion about?" Hana suddenly bustled into the scene. She stared at Sesshoumaru in surprise, saw the flowers, and glared at Kagome contemptuously.

"You're hogging the path!" she raged, pushing Kagome aside as she stormed off. A moment later Jyohaku passed them, and he quirked an eyebrow at the couple. Sesshoumaru responded with a steely stare of his own.

"Who is that woman?" he asked once they were gone.

"Kagome folded her arms tightly. "It's this bi—"

"Ah-ah," he said, holding her chin up. "No swearing, remember?"

"Kagome-sama, we'll make a move. I hope you guys have a wonderful date," Amari said, waving bashfully at them. "Kouhei-kun, maybe we ought to get dinner together too."

They were finally alone to themselves. Kagome pulled Sesshoumaru to a nearby stone bench. She breathed in her flowers.

"Thank you so much. You're so sweet, Sesshoumaru."

"Do you like the flowers?" he asked, just for the sake of it.

"I _love_ them." She saw a little hand-written note hiding among the bunches of lavender, and read it.

" _To many more years_."

A light frown dusted her features.

"But what's the occasion? As far as I remember, it's not my birthday."

Sesshoumaru's face quirked. He rapped her forehead. "It's true. You really do have short-term memory."

Quietly they walked down the stone path, hand in hand, until they reached the streets, and into a car park. A car beamed and beeped towards them.

Sesshoumaru walked towards to the car and leaned beside it.

"Well? What do you think?" he said, and Kagome stiffened. There was a small, prideful smile on his face. His hand smoothed against the shiny, silver exterior. "It's one of the latest models from Lexus. I liked it, and I thought you would too."

Kagome's jaw dropped. She felt like the world was spinning, along with the luxury car in it.

"W-wait. I thought your surprise was the flowers!"

"No, _miko_. It's a brand new car. For the both of us."

She wanted to faint.

* * *

They drove to the restaurant. Inside the car, Kagome joked as to when Sesshoumaru had learned to drive.

"I hope it's not one of those things that you magically just know."

Sesshoumaru shrugged. "Perhaps."

She looked at him for a moment, unsure if he was serious. "Where are we eating, by the way?"

"Somewhere Morikawa and I always frequent. Every time I'm there, I think about how you should be there too."

"It sounds like a really nice place."

"Indeed it is."

"You think about me a lot in everything you do, don't you?"

His golden-ochre eyes slid to hers.

"I think about you even when I sleep. If you ask me, it is actually a curse more than anything else."

"Gee," she replied, folding her arms tightly. "I was about to say I think of you all the time too, and you just had to say all that."

Kagome clasped her hands together as Sesshoumaru pored over the menu in the restaurant. Tetsuya's was packed, only accepting reservations. The air buzzed with a low chatter from its patrons, the soft tinkling of cutlery against plates.

"You know, this is my first time in a fine-dining restaurant. I really feel all out of sorts here," Kagome said, rubbing her arms self-consciously. She studied the other patrons who all dressed and laughed with an undeniable air of affluence.

Even Sesshoumaru seemed to align with the crowd, and this was the biggest observation she made—his jarring transition to become an actual member in society. It was good, she guessed, and he was doing really well, at a really fast pace. It had been in him all along, that strive to always reach higher places.

Some things never really change.

"And it won't be the first," Sesshoumaru replied, running his finger slowly through each offering on the mains section. "The important thing is to focus on yourself and enjoy the experience." He peered up. "What are you getting by the way?"

Kagome's eyes darted to her menu placed flat before her. "The uh, Spanner Crab with Bisque Custard & Burnt Onion Dashi."

He rubbed his jaw, still mulling over his choice. "In that case… I shall have the Slow Braised Wagyu Oyster Blade with Celeriac, Enoki & Lemon Thyme. Hmm, that is quite a mouthful, no?" and he started counting the words on his fingers, "Slow-Braised-Wagyu-Oyster-Blade…"

She laughed back at him. "Hmm, how about dessert?"

"Petits Fours," he immediately answered, his voice as grim as it was absolute. "Never leave Tetsuya's without their Petit Fours."

The waiter came and recorded their orders on a digital tablet.

"Shall we get some wine?" Sesshoumaru suddenly turned to her.

"W-wine?" she stuttered. "I really have no knowledge of what wine is good. I've always been a, you know, an Asahi Super Dry kind of girl."

"No matter." He turned back to the waiter. "We shall proceed with white wine. Two glasses of Riesling, please. And the Petit Fours. Do not forget them."

Kagome had no idea what Petit Fours were or why they were so important, and she smiled, and she looked at his serious face, and she laughed again.

She held his hand on the table and lightly squeezed it.

"Thank you for bringing me here today. We should go out on frequent dates like this."

His eyebrows raised. His fingers pulled away. "Date? Who said this was a date?"

"Oh. It's not? But I thought—"

Then his warm hand returned to clasp on hers. "Just a little joke. Of course it is. Well, have you remembered what occasion exactly we're celebrating?"

Kagome thought long and hard, her face scrunching up like a dried prune. At last today's date registered some familiarity into her and she almost shot up from her seat. How could it have missed her?

"It's the day of the binding!"

"Yes, it is. You could have worded it less literally, however."

The waiter came with their wine and served it into their glasses.

"Let's have a toast," Sesshoumaru said, raising his glass.

"To many more years," Kagome announced, remembering the note.

"No," Sesshoumaru corrected. His eyes glimmered. "To _forever_."

Their glasses clinked.

* * *

He drove the car up the hills. It had become their favourite spot, that corner at the top. When they reached, the place was quiet and soulless. In other words, perfect.

They remained in their car seats, watching the view from the windscreen. Sesshoumaru wound down the windows a bit, letting the breeze slip in. He tapped his finger against the steering wheel. After a moment of doubt, he decided to switch on the radio, the mumbled voices of a radio deejay filling the space between him and Kagome.

It was their first time coming here at night. The town's busy lights were like small colourful dots against a dark canvas. Kagome's eyes roamed over the vast settlements, at the rows of lights, and as much as she tried to, she couldn't find a pattern to link them all like a puzzle.

Sesshoumaru leaned close beside her. He pointed to something further up in the distance—at the quiet dark mountains rolling in deep slumber, as if guarding the town, old as time. Up above the full moon hung on the vast open sky, an omniscient king accompanied by his twinkling followers.

"That view up there in the mountains," he said, tracing its dusky peaks with his finger, "Do you see that? Down there, that is Mount Kajima, overshadowed by the ever-impressive Mount Fuji. Of course you're unable to really see much at this time of the night. People usually only come here to see the town lights." He relapsed into a deep silence. "This scene is the only thing that has not changed here in Tokyo for as long as I can remember."

Kagome smiled wistfully. She didn't know what to say each time he spoke about things like that. The past was foreign to her now—a secret faraway door in a forest labyrinth, swallowed into the walls.

A familiar song started to play softly on the speakers. She looked at Sesshoumaru. "Hey, don't we have this song in the old records at home? I really love this one."

Sesshoumaru listened for a while. "Yes, it's Chances Are by Johnny Mathis." Then his eyes met with hers. "Shall we?"

He took her hand and led her out from the car. The song continued to play from the open windows. Kagome giggled as she placed her hands shyly on his shoulders, while his gentle hands held her waist. Their bodies swayed in a slow dance. Their gazes never left each other.

Kagome blushed as Sesshoumaru performed a quiet serenade, his voice low and tender in her ears, and only for her ears.

 _'In the magic of moonlight  
_ _When I sigh, "Hold me close, dear"  
_ _Chances are you'll believe the stars  
_ _That fill the skies are in my eyes_

 _Guess you feel you'll always be  
_ _The one and only one for me  
_ _And if you think you could  
_ _Well, chances are your chances are awfully good'_

Kagome closed her eyes and she sighed, her breath withering on his neck. Her hand stroked down his back. His comforting warmth against her body was surreal, just like everything, up until that point, was.

"I feel like I'm in a movie," she said. Her voice was tremulous, the beginning of a confession. "I'm so happy right now, that I'm... I'm almost scared." She pressed her nose against his shoulder. "Do you feel what I'm feeling?"

"No," Sesshoumaru replied firmly. "Everything here is real. Not a dream, nor a simulation. It's the whole, unwavering truth." He cupped her small face, trembling in his hands. "You just need to close your eyes and let it sink in."

"What if I open my eyes and I wake up?"

"Do it," he said. "Close your eyes."

Kagome closed her eyes. Sesshoumaru's voice reverberated in the deepest channels of her ears, its echoes ebbing into her chest.

"Can you hear me? I will always be here for you. Even if it is the last thing you want."

She gripped him. "No. How can you be the last thing I want?"

Her lips desperately sought for his.

"I want you now and forever," she whispered against him.

"And you will. You will."

Kagome opened her eyes. She started in her empty bed, her wild eyes searching. She ran out of her bedroom, stopped to think, then dashed into the kitchen.

Sesshoumaru was cooking at the stove. She could smell pancakes in the air, a spatula in his hand. And he was wearing his old Hello Kitty apron.

He looked at Kagome over his shoulder, and smiled.

 _To be continued…_

 ** _[Credits: Chances Are as performed by Johnny Mathis, lyrics_ _written by Al Stillman, Robert Allen]_**


	25. Boy in the Woods

**Boy in the Woods**

A little jingle played in the speakers of the supermarket, signalling an automated announcement.

"Dear shoppers, please be informed the daily time sale in our store has commenced. Thank you for shopping."

Kagome walked down the aisle, looking at the detergent section. Her eyes scanned the rows of colourful liquid bottles, until it came to an empty space on the shelves. To her dismay, the Attack brand was out of stock.

No, Sesshoumaru would kick up a fuss if they used anything else.

She walked out of the aisle. There was a mad squabble at the fruits section as two old ladies fought over a watermelon, while other impatient housewives began grabbing the last of onion bags and long stalks of leek, while some hunkered with as much egg cartons their baskets could carry.

A staff appeared, trying his darndest to break up the fight. He was smartly dressed, implying his higher position in the supermarket. Kagome immediately felt sorry for him.

When the argument died down and the old ladies grumbled off, she quickly approached and tapped on his shoulder.

"Excuse me, do you have any more Attack liquid detergent?"

"Oh!" he said, with an eagerness to serve. He ran to the aisle with her. "We just had a customer buy an entire lot of it. But you know, you can always try the powder version. Or maybe you would like to try the Ariel brand instead? It's the second most popular brand here in Family Mart, and just as good!"

He paused when he realised Kagome was staring hard at him. Her sheer look alone killed the words on his tongue. Did he say something wrong? Was she really pissed she couldn't get the detergent she wanted?

His hand touting the Ariel detergent began to shake.

"Um, I'm sorry but if you really want the Attack liquid detergent, you m-may need to get it elsewhere. I know it's really disappointing but there's nothing much I can do to help..."

When her stare did not subside, he fell on his knees, prostrating himself on the ground. "Please forgive me, Kagome-sama! I truly did not want to disappoint you!"

Kagome took a step backwards, her hand over her mouth barely concealing her loud gasp. Her basket that hung on her arm slipped and fell, toppling over. Her grocery items danced on the floor as in slow-motion.

She watched as he rushed to gather her items, panicking in a manner that was so familiar to her…

"Ichiro-kun?" Kagome ventured breathlessly. "Is that you?"

He looked up in surprise, a bunch of potatoes in his hands. "Of course, it is. Who did you think it was?"

Something clicked in his eyes and he started to laugh. "I'm sorry, Kagome-sama! I forgot that we haven't met for some time. I had to go through a makeover shortly after becoming the store manager."

"They didn't let you keep your style?" Kagome asked, still in disbelief. "So, no more dreadlocks or piercings?"

Ichiro stood up and shook his head sadly. "The management said I had to look the part." Then he smiled and straightened his tie with a triumphant look. "Heh. But don't you think I look more _professional_ now?"

Kagome knelt on the ground, recovering her items. There was a glum look on her face. "I don't know, Ichiro-kun." She gave a resigned sigh. "I don't anything anymore."

* * *

She lifted her sunglasses over her face, letting it rest over her head. Kagome glanced at Ichiro behind her.

He looked like someone else with his full eyebrows and dark, natural hair. She knew Ichiro close to five years. It was beyond her imagination that this was how his real face appeared.

Kagome was _scared_ to even look at him. It felt like a slap to her face, and made her a little ill in the stomach for some reason. Ichiro resembled... She swallowed. She couldn't bear to say _that_ name.

She shook her head and cleared her throat. "Here, you said?"

"Yup, right here. This is where I sat, under this tree," he said.

Kagome and Ichiro had trekked themselves up Yamanote Memorial Hill. The sun was blazing over their heads on the cloudless sky. It had been raining only an hour before. They strayed off the beaten track, following Ichiro's re-enactment of the fateful day twenty years ago.

It was during a school trip, he had related to her, and they were making their way up the hill—or more like a _mountain_ to his ten-year old legs—when he heard someone call his name in the woods surrounding them.

Ichiro squatted on the ground, his eyes carefully observing the dense foliage.

"Doesn't look like anything now, does it? Actually, I can't believe you followed me here. I didn't think anyone would believe my story so quickly."

He glanced at Kagome, and realized she was giving him that stare again. It made him perspire even harder under the heat.

She quickly turned away. The dead leaves crunched noisily under her shoes as she walked, inspecting the area. The camphor tree Ichiro had pointed was a behemoth towering the other trees. It had to be a least a few hundred years old.

"So, you got lost in the woods and someone came to help you?"

"Not just that. I slipped and fell, and twisted my ankle. I must have made a whole lotta noise, because someone then heard my cries, and came over. Just a complete stranger. She carried me on her back, and that's when I realized she was bringing me to a _village_."

Kagome widened her eyes at him.

Ichiro continued. "A real, teeming village. Not those fake, touristy kinds. With people in shabby clothes and old-fashioned hairstyles. I knew somehow I wasn't in Tokyo anymore. They all spoke in a different dialect." He paused and frowned as he picked up fragments of his old memory. "I was... I was there for a few days. She had me in a hiding place because she didn't want anyone to see me. I didn't know why at that time. I was just so scared, and I couldn't walk."

"What kind of person was she?"

He gave a little smile. "She was kind. She nursed my ankle and she gave me food and water. I remember everything about her. Her face, her voice. She had a gentle touch. She was a... She was a _miko_."

"Oh," Kagome said, slightly taken aback.

"When I could finally manage myself, she guided me back to this tree. I paced a few steps ahead, but when I looked back, I couldn't find her. And then, I heard my teachers calling me."

Ichiro shook his head, his lips pursed tightly.

"None of them ever believed me. They said only a few hours had passed since I went missing. Can you believe that? And there was no such thing as a village around here. They were all gone, replaced by cities." He gave an exasperated sigh accompanied by a painful expression. "I kinda got famous in school for it. People thought I was nuts, and I regularly got teased. For awhile I just stopped talking to people."

Kagome took a moment, before she decided to offer her reply. "Well, just so you know there really was a village here. But it thrived only until the Meiji Restoration."

Ichiro turned to her, his bright eyes gleaming. "I know! I did my research. I've been coming to this hill every year, hoping that it would somehow happen again, but it never did. There really was a village here, hundreds of years ago! That's how my theory was further cemented." He hesitated over his words but looking at Kagome, something urged him further. "That I really went back through time."

Kagome removed her sunglasses and smiled at him. "I do believe you, Ichiro-kun. I believe everything you said. It's really not that impossible. You must have slipped through a temporary crack in the timeline."

Ichiro was over the moon as he shook her shoulders.

"Right? My god, I'm so happy! You don't know how long I needed to hear those words!"

Kagome was startled as he gave her a hug. She patted his back slowly.

"I know how it feels," she said.

"I'm so sorry," Ichiro said, holding her tightly, "I'm just so overwhelmed right now. Just...just give me a moment, alright."

Kagome nodded. She wished there was someone like him back then, someone she could have traded her stories with. Maybe she wouldn't have spiralled down that hole of misery, claiming her college education and so many years off her life.

The late priest wouldn't have healed her. And then she probably wouldn't have been a _miko_.

"I swear you're perfect in every way. It's just unfair." He sighed as he released her.

"What's unfair?" Kagome didn't understand.

"How he comes into the picture and steals you away just like that." Ichiro's voice was a bit bitter, and mostly sad. "I've been standing here before you all this time, and you've never even noticed me."

Kagome went speechless.

 _No Ichiro, don't look at me like that—_

They heard the sound of falling rain. Before they knew it the skies had opened up, throwing another hot shower. They were caught by surprise.

"Looks like it's time to go home!" he shouted, running out of the woods.

"Goddammit!"

Kagome followed him home. It rained cats and dogs as they got closer and although she got wet, Ichiro had fared worse.

They reached his apartment, and she was quickly reminded of its micro living conditions.

"You have books all over your floor," she groaned, as she stumbled down the narrow hallway in her damp clothes. She picked up the magazine she had accidentally kicked, and spotted a demure model inside the pages, wearing a shrine maiden's costume.

She smacked the magazine at him. "It's true, isn't it, you do have a _miko_ fetish. Amari told me you have a thing for them for ages. Now it kinda makes sense."

"Errr, I'll go change my clothes first, real quick," Ichiro mumbled in embarrassment, skipping into the bathroom as fast as he could.

Kagome sighed as she picked his books scattering on the floor. His obsession with time travel was insane. Other than that weird magazine, it was all he read about.

But why? Her thoughts suddenly prodded her. Why does Ichiro look so much like _him_? She had been trying to avoid coming to that conclusion, and now it felt as though a light had been cast forcefully to her face.

What if…Ichiro was really a reincarnation? Their personalities were worlds apart and he was nothing like that person at all... Then again it wasn't a fair assessment, Kagome realized, because _she_ was a prime example of just that.

Someone whispered her name. Kagome stilled, the books dropping from her grasp. It had came from the closet.

She eyed the bathroom door cautiously. Ichiro was still changing inside. She stared at the closet door, hard enough to drill a hole through,  
challenging it to prove that it was just mere imagination.

The voice whispered again. This time she felt her hairs stand on her body, and that sick feeling in her stomach exacerbated, a low, sinister thrumming.

Kagome walked to the closet, and opened it.

A woman stood inside, dressed in a complete _miko_ attire.

She had a face Kagome could never forget, because she saw it everyday in her own.

The one person that made her strive harder for everything in life, just so she could prove to herself that she was indeed worth it—an old shadow that lurked in her subconscious, permanently shaping her deep insecurities.

Her own voice whispered to her: _Kikyo_.

Kagome felt her knees give way.

* * *

Her eyes fluttered open. She saw nothing but white space, and for a moment wondered if she had died and was now floating in non-existence.

Kagome frowned, her vision adjusting itself. The stringent smell of disinfectant filled her nose. An overhead fan spinned quietly. She was in a hospital ward.

Immediately the horrors of the day swarmed back into memory.

"Kagome-sama, you're awake."

She turned her body away and covered her ears. "No," she murmured. "No, go away."

She felt as Ichiro neared the bed, a hand towards her. "Please, I can explain! What you saw was a mannequin—"

"No!" she cried in anguish. She lashed her eyes angrily at him.

"Why do you like me, Ichiro? Is it because I look like _her_?"

He had confusion all over his face. "What? No..." There was guilt, fear, and a cloying kind of concern in his voice.

"Kagome-sama, I'm worried about you—"

She was screaming. Kagome drew her knees up and shut her eyes, her fingers tugging on her hair.

"I said leave me alone!" Her body shook as her sobs overtook her. "Please! I'm begging you right now..."

The door to the ward slammed open with a jarring bang. Ichiro jerked in shock. Sesshoumaru appeared in the doorway, his figure dark and imposing.

"Leave her," he ordered, his eyes simmering in a quiet rage.

"Sesshoumaru!"

Kagome pulled herself up, her face streaked with ugly tears. She reached out to him as though she was drowning.

When Sesshoumaru finally took her in his arms, she clung to him dearly and inhaled his scent, and the world was safe and calm once more, away from the sheer madness of everything else.

Her tears kept flowing. "Please, I want to go home. Bring me back, Sesshoumaru..."

"It's alright," came his comforting voice. "I'm here."

Sesshoumaru looked over his shoulder. His glare was dangerous, predatory even. Then slowly his eyes began to glow, as though a fire was burning in them.

"Why are you still here?"

Ichiro shook. Suddenly the lights in the ward started to flicker. He stammered on his feet, gasping as he raised his head.

"What the hell!"

The fluorescent lights above him had gotten so bright the tubes were going to burst. He heard a buzzing noise, a spark somewhere, and he knew then they were really going to explode—

—and it was all done by _him_.

Ichiro ran.

 _To be continued…_


	26. Make Me Forget

**Make Me Forget**

 _She had been on the way to the cave, when she heard his cries._

 _Kikyou knelt closer to the boy. He was a ravenous creature, gobbling through the rice crackers like an imp, but an imp she knew he was not. Despite his foreign clothes and peculiar speech, he looked like any other child who had gotten lost in the woods._

 _The miko observed as he ate the food she had offered. She hated rice crackers the most; they were salty little things, but Onigumo loved them, which was the only reason they were in her keep._

 _She stroked his hair kindly. She knew instantly when she saw him that he was not of this realm. Kikyou had heard enough stories from the old village head; of strange people that crept out from this magical forest. This boy had escaped from somewhere, a tiny doorway on the tree, or perhaps a deep burrow underneath the ground._

 _A warm delight spread across her chest and she smiled. It was her first time chancing upon one of these fabled beings. A poor, fear-stricken child crying over his injured foot. She could not remember when she last felt this much excitement; bound by her restrictive shrine duties, she secretly ached to meet new people._

 _"Eat more," she urged, bringing forth more crackers. "Eat more, little child. And worry not, for I will take care of you."_

* * *

"Why do they find joy in such things?"

She hadn't been eating her meals well ever since she left the hospital. She hadn't been taking care of herself properly, for that matter. A kind of solace and comfort presented itself at the corner of her bed, and she curled herself there quietly for days—like a small rabbit hibernating in a deep burrow during winter—shutting herself from the rest of the world.

Sesshoumaru had taken to personally feed and bathe her, tasks she no longer found important. Kagome had a larger matter to worry about, a putrid coagulation of thoughts that festered like gangrene in her mind. It had robbed her capability to function in a normal manner.

She was getting better now as the days passed. She had started talking to him.

Sesshoumaru had just given her a morning bath and clean clothes to wear, and he was brushing through the matted tangles in her hair when she suddenly posed the question.

He paused for a while. " _They_? Who's they?"

"The gods," Kagome replied. "Why do they find joy in such things? Playing _tricks_ like that."

Her tone was surprisingly lucid, although lacking in her usual exuberance. It was apparent this question had been moldering in her mind for days.

He continued to work the hairbrush gently through her long tresses, taking his time.

"Perhaps they think we're taking ourselves too seriously," he answered. "Hence, the occasional twists and turns of fate."

"I don't see any humour in it at all."

"It was never about us to begin with."

Sesshoumaru knew from her rigid breaths that there was something she wanted to claw out of her chest. He did not coax her; rather preferred to let it simmer inside until it reached its boiling point.

She turned slightly to pierce him with a distrustful eye.

"Did you know who Ichiro was from the very beginning? Or were you emulating the gods—taking a backseat as you watch everything unfurl?"

Sesshoumaru pulled back her hair, gathering them into a tight bunch. He secured it with a hair tie, then brushed down her ponytail until it shone smoothly. He ran the strands through his fingers. Not bad, he thought, admiring his handiwork, seeing that it had looked like a dark stack of hay only minutes ago.

Sesshoumaru placed the hairbrush back on the dresser.

"That he was Inuyasha's reincarnation? The signs were blatantly obvious. You just did not see them." He moved around to smoothen the front of her dress, and saw her discontented look. "I assumed you had noticed my thinly-veiled disdain of him, at the very least."

Kagome breathed out a wry laugh. "So not only am I blind, I'm stupid too."

"'Where ignorance is bliss, 'tis folly to be wise'. There is a certain sense of liberation, in being unable to see or know."

She became unsettlingly quiet, and he admitted his fault in ruffling her feathers. The last thing he wanted was for her to withdraw back in that shell of despair.

"Well, what do you want to do about him?"

A slight tension drew on her forehead as her eyes conjured up a mental image.

"He keeps a mannequin of that person. To think that it's loosely based on a memory twenty years ago; I find it amazing how he got most of her features right."

She shook her head, laughing her wry laugh again. "I don't think I want to see him, at least for the time being. It's different now. I don't think I can handle it, just _remembering_."

* * *

Ichiro's hand trembled as he held his lighter aflame to his cigarette. The breeze was picking up, carrying a faint scent of rain. It was a quarter after midnight, and he had just finished his shift. Standing beside his red Kawasaki in his motorcycle jacket as he finished the last sticks in his pack, he learnt something new that day—that the taste of smoked tobacco and salty tears didn't mix well in his throat.

And really, what a crybaby he was, crying over a _girl_ in the car park, and no wonder the kids used to tease him back then all the time...

His phone rang and he jolted. He slipped his lighter into the breast pocket of his jacket, then quickly filched out his phone.

Ichiro answered the call, wiping his eyes just in time. His sister's high-pitched voice came on the line.

" _Onii-chan_! What took you so long to answer?"

He removed his cigarette from his lips. "Sorry. It's really late though, Amari. What's up?"

"Nothing, just that I'm sick of having to think of excuses whenever Mom and Dad are asking about you. You know you haven't visited us for ages."

"Right. I just don't feel like seeing Dad's face."

"Why don't you just tell them the truth? That you're not really an insurance agent?" Amari's voice seemed to get smaller. "I know you've been working at the supermarket, and I promise you that we'll love you all the same."

"How did you know?"

"Oh _onii-chan_ , it's such a small town... There's really nowhere you can hide."

Ichiro sighed. He had nothing else to say.

"Look, I have an idea. My birthday is coming. I think it's a good opportunity for you to visit. And oh! I'll make sure Mom doesn't ask again when you're getting married!"

"Yeah, you better do," he replied. "Amari, I gotta go now. You take care of yourself. I hope you're still not crushing on that priest."

"Idiot! That's none of your business. I'm so mad at you right now. Goodnight!"

He laughed and said goodnight to his sister, then slipped his phone back into his pocket. He wore his helmet and mounted his Kawasaki as it revved to life.

He sped into the empty highway. It was a long and winding road atop a tall cliff, his right facing the rippling ocean. Ichiro didn't feel like going home tonight. He wished he could feel the cool ocean winds blowing at his face for eternity, his trusty big bike bringing him to anywhere but there.

There was a man right in the middle of the road. Ichiro swerved hard to the left, and his motorcycle crashed into the metal barriers. The impact caused his body to fling out to the opposite direction. He saw a glimpse of the ocean, as his body slammed and rolled over the barriers at the edge of the cliff.

In a sinking hopeless fear, he felt the cloak of doom enshroud him, the banal events of his whole life whizzing past his eyes.

His body stopped itself before it careened into the death trap below. A jutting rock below the edge had snagged the back of his jacket. He hung there precariously, his feet touching the stomach-roiling image of the crashing ocean waves a hundred feet below him, the wind howling in his face.

For the first time in his life, Ichiro actually prayed.

"You."

He looked up. He saw the man standing above. If the man bent down and extended his hand, Ichiro could be saved...

"Help me!" he cried. He didn't dare to raise his hand yet—a wrong movement would spell a quick death.

The man stood there quietly, watching him. He had a pair of flaming beacons for eyes, his long silvered hair whipping in the wind behind him. The creeping realization of who he was made his fear spike to unspeakable heights.

"I cannot hear you."

"Help me, please!" He had tears in his eyes again. "I don't want to die here."

"Why not? A pest deserves to die the moment it is discovered."

Ichiro could feel his heart thumping in his ears against the loud sound of the crashing waves. A cold dread seized him. He remembered those haunting, glowing eyes and the flickering lights. It was either the man, or the sharp, jagged rocks below him.

"I admit that was my folly, letting you run around heedless. And now you overstepped your boundaries."

"I didn't do anything! Please, just help me!"

He shook his head slowly. "I cannot simply forgive anyone who hurts the _miko_."

The man knelt down. This time Ichiro could see his face clearer in the lamplight. His obscure name finally loomed in his mind: _Sesshoumaru. That was the name she screamed for._

"Do you wish to know how he died?" Sesshoumaru asked. The smile he slowly presented was chilling. " _Your predecessor_."

His hand reached down, but not to help. Instead it hovered near his breast pocket, and slipped out the lighter within.

Sesshoumaru struck the lighter near Ichiro's face, the burning flame dancing dangerously in the wind, licking on his skin.

"They found his charred remains inside that burnt orphanage. Black, as soot."

" _No_. No, please," Ichiro cried, shaking his face away. The bright flame illuminated the tears running down his cheeks.

"He will never plead for me to save his life. Not like what you're doing," Sesshoumaru said. "And that's why you are smarter than him."

His jacket slipped over the rock, giving way under his weight. Ichiro reached out his hand in a desperate bid as he fell, and Sesshoumaru caught it in his, holding him firmly.

Ichiro doubled over on the road, down to his knees. He coughed, retching his dinner onto the concrete ground.

He wiped his mouth and rolled over, shaking as he hugged himself. Sesshoumaru leaned over him.

"What do you want from me?" Ichiro bawled, shielding his face.

"Do you love her?" he asked matter-of-factly, in a manner one would enquire about the weather. "Do you love her, Kagome Higurashi?"

"Yes." His teeth gritted. "Yes, because she's kind and she's sweet and she believes in me."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "But she is suffering now because of you, can you see? She almost lost her mind like a raging lunatic. I had to drag her back to her senses.

Now if you wish to play the hero in her story, you will know what to do to ease her torment, no?"

He slipped the lighter back into Ichiro's pocket.

"Goodbye," Sesshoumaru said.

Ichiro opened his eyes just slightly, shuddering behind his arms.

Then the skies opened and the rain came beating unabashedly on his body, and he became all cold and sober and alone in the middle of that road, as if everything that happened was only but a mere hallucination.

The lingering taste of tears and smoke would remain in his throat.

* * *

Kagome leaned into her bathroom mirror. She had been standing there for two hours, studying her 27-year old self. Two hours to convince herself that there was remotely nothing in her to suggest that she was that woman in her previous life.

She remembered vaguely she had this exercise when she was fifteen years old. Here she was right now, twelve years later—her unbridled angst from yesteryears now tamer, but still having to rehash those very same thoughts.

The slender bridge of her nose burgeoning to a bulbous tip. The way she barely covered her mouth when she laughed, her occasional impertinence towards authority. What her thoughts were on the Liberal Democratic Party and the Yomiuri Giants baseball team. How her favourite movie was Shrek and how she secretly loathed rice crackers.

They were all of hers, and no one else.

No, she told herself. Ichiro didn't like her because she looked like Kikyou. He had no idea. Kikyou was just a fantasy in his head he held on from their brief meeting.

The same way _she_ did, holding on to Inuyasha's memories until they consumed her. Wasn't she in this predicament now with Sesshoumaru because of it? At least she never kept a mannequin inside her closet.

"Kagome Higurashi," she mouthed her name carefully into the mirror. She locked with her dark eyes in her reflection. "That's who you are."

Sesshoumaru sat at his desk in his room in the dark, the muffled sounds of the thunderstorm outside his window accompanying him. His eyes were fixated on the bright screen of his laptop, as his finger scrolled down on a recent news article.

 _'NEW TERRORIST GROUP CLAIMS RECENT ATTACKS IN EASTERN CAPE, SOUTH AFRICA,'_ the headline said.

He heard a soft knock on the door. Sesshoumaru closed his web browser.

" _Miko_?" he answered when he opened the door.

Kagome had changed in a white shift for the night. He wondered if she was aware of how the diaphanous material did little to hide the dark silhouette of her body.

"Will you be going to bed?" she asked.

"No, not tonight," he said. "I have a bit of work to do."

Her features shifted slightly. "Work?"

Sesshoumaru closed the door behind him. "Why are you here, _miko_?"

"I just needed someone beside me," Kagome replied quietly. She glanced away. "Specifically you."

He shrugged. "Perhaps if you say please when you ask..."

Her eyes swept back at him, cold and sharp. She had a smile on her face. "Oh, I'm not asking you, Sesshoumaru. I'm ordering you to."

She could feel him fidget inside, tensing under his well-kept facade. "Yes, my lady," he replied in a strained voice.

Kagome nodded and turned for her room. She hadn't took a few steps when her body was suddenly lifted from the ground in a swift motion.

Sesshoumaru carried her, despite her indignance. He placed her carefully in her bed, even tucking in her blankets in a painstaking, methodical manner. Really, the gall of him teasing her. He was growing insolent without a doubt.

"Any more orders, my lady?" he asked. "I have the rest of my life to fulfill them."

"Yes," she breathed. She waited until his gaze was on hers. "I want you to make me forget everything that's happened. _Please_."

"You're not being very clear, _miko_. I only act on clear directives—"

She raised her head and kissed his cheek. Then her lips lingered to the side of his face, kissing the juncture below his ear. She could smell his light sweat. Her lips carried lower, further down his neck, leaving a slow trail of fluttering kisses. Her hand slipped under his shirt, smoothening up his warm abdomen and then, his hard chest.

Her teeth grazed against his collarbone, as a finger carelessly brushed against his nipple. Sesshoumaru clenched his jaw, all his strength perused in a single, ragged breath.

Kagome whispered in his ear.

"Is this clear enough for you, Sesshoumaru?"

The rain did not falter outside the windows. If anything it had grew denser in the night, the ground shaking with thunder as the torrential storm persisted in its rage.

Sesshoumaru moved relentlessly, surrendering all of himself and everything within. Their bodies were caught in a whirlwind of fire, where only a soul-escaping climax could subdue its flames.

"Just like that, just like that, " Kagome chanted feverishly as she moved with him. Her eyes had rolled so far back that he only could see its whites. And then her words died, and her lips mouthed in silence as she reached that otherworldly plane, a plane where nothing existed but blinding, mind-shattering pleasure. She had forgotten how to speak.

Sesshoumaru buried his face in the crook of her neck as he joined her. In that special edge where sanity and dreams collided, he wanted to forget too.

 _To be continued..._


	27. Role Reversal Day

A/N: It goes without saying that this fic has grown abysmally dark, and totally off from its mellow, slice-of-feel origins. Ironically enough some of the recent scenes (Kikyou's mannequin inside the closet; Ichiro hanging precariously from the cliff) have been stuck in my head for more than a year when I first laid out this story, but I just never had the courage to go that far. I'm honestly happy, to be honest.

Anyway seeing that things are just going to go downhill from now onwards, and some of our characters will never laugh the same way again, I thought it would be a good idea to take a break and revisit those carefree moments. And so for my enduring fans who lasted to this page, I present to you all: a special light-hearted chapter.

 **Role Reversal Day**

The alarm clock continued to ring its incessant tune.

Sesshoumaru was still in bed, a pillow grappled over his face. He was this close to reaching the end of his tether and crushing the source of the racket—when a hand came to switch the alarm off.

"Good morning!" came Kagome's chirpy voice. "Wakey wakey! You don't want to wait 'til the sun hits—" She yanked his pillow off and slammed it down hard "—on your face!"

Sesshoumaru raised with the vigor of the undead being resurrected against their will. His knees drew up miserably as he rubbed the sleep off his face. When he looked up, he saw Kagome bending before him on the _futon_ in a French maid's uniform.

He rubbed his face some more, but knew he wasn't dreaming. It was Role Reversal Day.

"This Sesshoumaru will go to work at his own pace," he murmured groggily.

Kagome giggled. "Not in Yukino-jingu!"

Mariya Takeuchi's Plastic Love was blasting from the phonograph speakers as Kagome prepared his _bento_ set in the kitchen. Sesshoumaru ate his _natto_ beans at the table. He couldn't help but latch his eyes on her twitching butt, clad in the short frilly skirt of her uniform as she danced to the 80s city pop music.

Kagome turned and he forcibly tore his gaze away, choking on his coffee.

"Don't forget to eat your lunch in time!" she hollered at the door when he was leaving. "Have a great day at work, Sesshoumaru-sama!"

Sesshoumaru took his sweet time riding to the shrine. He chained his bicycle under the first _torii_ gate then trudged his way up the long flight of steps.

When his mildly petulant face appeared at the entrance upstairs, Amari quickly spied him from afar. She panicked. Sesshoumaru was late and the head priest was going to blow his top…

She saw Jyohaku standing outside rigidly by the wishing stand. He was reading some of the ridiculous wishes written on the wooden plaques. She ran forward to distract him.

"Morning, Jyohaku-sama!" Amari greeted, making sure he turned to face her way. Then she quirked her face at Sesshoumaru to warn him.

Sesshoumaru strode behind them with the elusive swiftness of an eagle. He gave her a discreet thumbs-up sign.

At the same time Kouhei was walking out from the prayer hall, yawning as he stretched out his back in the early morning. His face lit up when he saw Sesshoumaru arrive. And then the witch of Yukino-jingu stepped out beside Kouhei and instantly her evil eyes caught Sesshoumaru, waltzing in half an hour late for work.

"SE—" Hana started to scream. Kouhei covered her mouth and dragged her back in.

"Oh, what was that?" Jyohaku said, looking sharply towards the direction of the mid-scream.

"Nothing!" Amari blocked him. "Jyohaku-sama, guess what day it is today!"

"What day is it?" he frowned, wondering.

"It's my birthday," Amari said, beaming shyly. "I was wondering if we should, ah, go have a drink tonight?"

"What is this?" Jyohaku barked when he entered the prayer hall a while later. Sesshoumaru and Amari were bent over the wooden floors, spring-cleaning with a rag because the shrine couldn't afford mops. "I step into the hall and the first thing I do is sneeze!"

Except no one heard you sneeze, Sesshoumaru thought. He saw as Jyohaku's shadow fell long and dark across him.

Jyohaku had been itching throughout the whole day to find fault with him. The priest lived through belittling the efforts of others and found a depraved pleasure in making his apprentices do pointless cleaning.

"Did you even sweep this place?" he snarled at Sesshoumaru, pining him down with a condescending eye.

Amari cowered beside him. "We did, we cleaned everywhere and now we're mopping the floors."

Jyohaku sneered and walked to the windows. He took a swipe at the window sill, then raised his finger as though it represented a miniature trophy. "Look at this! Dust on my fingers! And you dare to deceive me by saying you've thoroughly cleaned this area…"

Sesshoumaru stood up and threw his wet rag onto Jyohaku's face.

Amari screamed as the both of them landed on the floor, the men bellowing with curses as their bodies wrestled before the holy statue of Inari-okami.

"Guys, please stop fighting!" Amari cried. "It's my birthday today! It's supposed to be a good day!"

"Just give us five minutes!" Jyohaku sputtered as Sesshoumaru locked his neck from behind in a strangle-hold, "I've longed for this fight since the first day I met him!"

Outside the hall Kouhei and Hana watched the strange scene curiously before they glanced at each other. "How about a bet?" they suggested.

Unfortunately for her, Hana lost 5000 yen to Kouhei that day (approx. 50 dollars) and as a result she became an even more bitter person if that was possible (she had bet on Jyohaku).

They opened their lunch boxes at the garden precisely at noon later. Kouhei and Amari gasped in open-mouthed delight as they beheld the splendorous art of food arrangement in Sesshoumaru's _bento_ set. The rice and accompanying ingredients were fashioned to appear in the shape of Hello Kitty.

Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow.

"Too cute!" Kouhei said, blown away. "I'm _legit_ jealous right now! That's it, I want a talented chef as my maid too!"

"Well, they don't come easy," Sesshoumaru deadpanned, drinking from his milk carton that had come with his lunch.

"Anyway guys, it's gossip time," Amari whispered with the tone of the scheming. The three of them huddled their heads down into a ring.

"Look what I found when I stalked him online last night," she said, showing everyone screenshots on her phone.

"And that is...?" Sesshoumaru enquired on the lady in the photograph.

"Rie Sakurazaka," Kouhei answered immediately. "She's a popular actress who was married to Jyohaku back during his wrestling days as Onizuka the Terrible."

"She's gorgeous, isn't she?" Amari gushed hopelessly. "But ah, they were only married for 89 weeks and 23 days…"

"Did it occur to you that he's just not marriage material?" Sesshoumaru suggested just for the sake of it.

"But I have to admit he still looks suave despite retiring from the ring!" Kouhei said.

"The both of you have been blinded," Sesshoumaru replied.

They raised their heads to gulp a breath of fresh air.

"Speaking of which, Amari," Kouhei said again, "Isn't today your birthday?"

"Oh that's right. I accidentally asked the head priest out for a drink later. Do you guys want to come along?"

"How does one accidentally…" Sesshoumaru started, and then he gave up.

They gathered inside Jyohaku's office at the end of the day.

"No," Sesshoumaru said.

Jyohaku folded his arms stubbornly. "Well, _someone_ has to be the designated driver."

Sesshoumaru shook his head. "And if I'm going to a bar, I might as well drink."

"True that," Jyohaku nodded in agreement.

"I'm most definitely not fetching a cab home," Kouhei said. "The fare is going to be outrageous and I already blew my pay on PS4 games this month."

"Let me be clear. So everyone wants to drink tonight?" Sesshoumaru asked.

"Yes!" they all chorused in unison.

Kagome was curled up on the couch after a tedious day of housework. She was munching through her dried seaweed snack, watching the 50th re-telecast of _Oshin_ on TV when her phone rang.

"What? Come pick you all up at 10?" she repeated, staring at her phone in disbelief. "Oh alright, fine." She tossed her phone away and resumed her drama. "Not like I have a choice anyway."

They gave a toast with their cold beers at the bar. " _Kampai_!"

Jyohaku ordered some octopus and eel. Sesshoumaru stood up and excused himself to the washroom.

"Oh, I need to go too," Kouhei said.

When he was done, Sesshoumaru exited from the washroom doors. Someone grabbed his arm and pulled him aside. It was Kouhei.

"Not so fast," he said.

"And what exactly are we stalling for, pray tell?"

Kouhei gestured ahead. "I just wanted to give them both some alone time, that's all."

They watched from the back as Jyohaku explained to Amari at the counter the enchanting stories behind the names of his thirteen cats. It looked like a good conversation.

"I'm not a pessimist by nature," Sesshoumaru said. "A nihilist, yes, but that's entirely another thing. What I'm trying to say is, the lady has an undeniably bleak prospect when it comes to him."

"I know," Kouhei said. "But the world works in the strangest of ways sometimes, so who are we to say?"

"I suppose that is the appeal of being human. To see beauty even in the most unwisest of things."

Kouhei looked at him. "But we're all humans at the end of the day, aren't we?"

"You're a funny young man. Now, how about a cake to surprise Amari?"

Amari got the surprise of her lifetime when the whole bar started breaking out in a rendition of "Happy Birthday".

She covered the tears in her eyes when a birthday cake with lighted candles came waving to her face.

"Go on, make a wish," Jyohaku said beside her.

Amari closed her eyes, took a deep breath and blew out the candles. The staff and patrons all clapped for her.

Kagome arrived precisely at ten, in her silver Lexus. She saw the bar inside rife with music and celebration. She waited in the car, looking at her watch. "I'll give them half an hour tops," she said to herself. "Or everybody is paying gas money."

They all got in the car after some time.

"You don't have to look so glum," Sesshoumaru said, buckling his seat belt beside her. "We were only an hour late."

Kagome glared back at him. "Yeah, and their distance home is coming right out of your pocket." She eyed the rear-mirror sharply, looking at Amari who looked quite sick. "And no vomiting in the backseat!"

"You have quite a lively maid there, Sesshoumaru," Jyohaku commented.

"Shut up, you stupid priest."

Kagome returned into the house with her pail and cleaning supplies. "Really, if you already _knew_ Amari has a weak tolerance to alcohol," she was saying. "Think of the leather seats!"

"Ah, but the night out was her idea. I was only going with the flow." Sesshoumaru reclined on the couch and peered at her. "Why don't you tend to me now? Come here and remove my socks, Kagome."

Kagome narrowed her eyes at him. She wanted to wipe the cunning smile off his face.

"Yes my lord," she said begrudgingly as she bent over his raised foot.

Sesshoumaru sighed in contentment. After a warm scrub in the bath, he was now lying in bed as Kagome kneaded his back with a vigorous massage. The angry pressure was just right on his tired muscles after a hard day's work and drinking.

"Everyone is right. I'm really lucky to have such a duty-bound maid by my side. But do you know what really gets me lucky?"

Sesshoumaru sent her a suggestive look over his shoulder. Kagome stilled, then gritted her teeth.

"That's it!" she screamed, yanking out her uniform. "I'm having enough of this role reversal crap!"

"Ah-ah. A good maid never objects to her master's demands."

"It's past midnight, so it doesn't count anymore! And your demands are increasingly intolerable!"

"Touché. I was only imitating your unreasonable style. I think I'm beginning to understand how you're actually just dumping your frustrations on me from work."

"At least I never asked for _that_!"

"Oh yes, you do."

Kagome growled at the end of the bed. She would have looked apt as a pomeranian. If only her _reiki_ wasn't flaring, pink sparks forming in the air above her.

Sesshoumaru knew when he was beaten. In a theatrical manner he knelt down to the floor, bowing his head down. "I surrender to thee, oh young _miko_."

Kagome smiled in satisfaction. She lifted his chin and decided she did miss the conflicted expression of subservience on his face.

"Good boy, that's more like it. Do you want to be my master again, Sesshoumaru?"

"No, I quite like this position. Although I admit it was refreshing for a change."

"You know what you should say."

Sesshoumaru looked into her eyes. For a moment they gazed at each other, and they got a glimpse of two souls bound and chained under their circumstances.

"Do with me what you will…" he said.

And Kagome finished for him,

"...break the spell, and take your fill."

 _To be continued!_

 _[A/N: I really enjoyed writing that! Random trivia #62: Kouhei is a secret fan of both Sesshoumaru and Jyohaku!]_


	28. A Creeping Sense of Cherophobia

**A Creeping Sense of Cherophobia**

"More of these?" Kagome said.

Hana had retrieved the scriptures from the old archives, sending them to her by the trolley-load. The musty heap of scrolls on her table unraveled to reveal rows of indecipherable _kanji_. To the untrained eye, they appeared like squiggles.

She frowned and looked up. "Isn't it _your_ work to translate these scriptures?"

"Yes," Hana said flippantly. "But the priest said you knew how to read ancient calligraphy too. So I thought, why not share the workload?"

"This isn't sharing, you're practically dumping me everything."

Hana huffed angrily and turned to leave. "Look, you're never going to be promoted if you're constantly lazy and picky with your work. You can finish all of this within a day, if you stop day-dreaming for once."

"Hana!" Kagome called outside the door. She caught the senior miko just before she slipped into a turn. Hana looked back at her, a half-smile fixed on her face. "Why don't you just die and go back to hell?"

Hana giggled. "Oh Kagome, we're already in hell." Then she disappeared, leaving behind her unhinged laughter.

"Just die and go back to hell?" A deep, male voice repeated at the corridor. Kagome turned. The head priest had been watching them from a corner. "Your rivalry is _intense_."

Immediately Kagome ducked back into the room.

"I can't stand that evil woman!" she burst as he followed behind her. "I thought you were bad, but she's just plain devilish. And I know she has been talking ill of me to you. I heard her the other day in your office." She sat frustratedly on her chair. Her nose flared at the mess waiting for her. "She just doesn't want to see me succeed."

Jyohaku folded his arms and leaned against the table. "Well, whatever she says won't cloud my judgement of you. I'm the only person who knows you truly well in this place. So if I say you're stupid, it means you're really stupid."

Kagome rolled her eyes. "So you're not on her side? I thought you would have succumbed under her charms at this point."

He chuckled. "Tell me, do I look like an easy man to please? You should know of all people."

She stared at Jyohaku. He raised back his eyebrows at her in question.

"What do _I_ know? I've been trying to figure that out myself for five years. What exactly makes you tick. I call it the Mystery of Yukino-jingu."

He almost smacked her head. "Is that how you behave to the person responsible for your appraisal?" he said. "You're incorrigible, Higurashi."

"Unreasonable," Kagome countered.

"Head-in-the-clouds."

"Rude."

"Dilligent."

She looked at him in surprise and Jyohaku laughed back at her face. "I knew it. You couldn't take it if I ever complimented you."

Her face grew red but she quickly recovered. "And you... You're occasionally kind." She smiled and took a magnifying glass near her and began to study the texts.

"Occasionally kind, eh. I take that." Jyohaku glanced disinterestedly at the scriptures. They were from a historical collection of a priest's observations on the practice of _sokushinbutsu_ or self-mummification. Translating them required a long, deliberate process. In a painstaking dainty handwriting, Kagome wrote down her translations in Modern Japanese on parchment paper.

Jyohaku had been roaming around the shrine grounds aimlessly that day. His desk was left untouched and he would make himself disappear at the sight of a visitor. He gave no orders, nor spoke to anyone. A button rested somewhere in his head, and he had switched it off.

It was during one of his meanderings when he had stumbled into Kagome and Hana arguing. He hadn't intervened until Kagome flared. It was always entertaining to see his apprentice riled up in that manner.

"This sentence is a bit muddy," Kagome suddenly said, pointing to a line on the scripture. "Can you try to decipher what it says?"

"Where?" Jyohaku said, squinting as he took his reading glasses out from his pocket. He neared his face to the page, tracing the sentence with a finger.

"Oh. It says here... 'Mark your calendar two months from today. Because someone is finally going to be a fully-anointed priestess.' "

"What?" Kagome said. "Someone?"

He frowned and removed his glasses. "Oh come on. Or do I have to say your name too?"

Kagome stood up, shaking in pure disbelief. "Oh my god, are you... Are you..."

"It's not official yet, so keep it confidential," he hushed her. "So when I _do_ inform you officially, you have to act like you're hearing it for the first time, understand?"

"Oh gods! No, I can't believe it!" She felt like bursting into tears there and there. This was it—the number one milestone in her life. She had clinched it at last. No more a mere shrine maiden in Yukino-jingu, but an actual ranked priestess. Her whole life had been leading up to this. Finally, Kagome could be someone she was proud of.

She wanted to throttle the priest out of immense joy, but rewarded him with a suffocating hug instead.

"Thank you Inari-okami! I must be dreaming right now! For _years_ , I waited for this..."

"You don't have to be so dramatic," Jyohaku chided. Then again he couldn't remember the last time a woman hugged him. Years, definitely.

He admitted feeling relieved then—Kagome was back to her spirited, jovial ways. That light he admired in her eyes had somewhat faded recently. It was good to see whatever dark cloud hanging over her had passed. Then again he never knew exactly what was in her head most of the time.

"Anyway, how are you?" Jyohaku asked her, adopting a more casual tone. He briefly touched her shoulder. "You were on sick leave for a week. Care to tell me what happened?"

Kagome hesitated. "I'm sorry. It's slightly personal."

"Not even a little bit? I'm only concerned with what hounds my dear apprentices. Oh wait, you're not my apprentice anymore."

She passed him a bitter smile and stared blankly at the scriptures on the table. _Sokushinbutsu_ was such a dark subject; it was in essence, assisted ritual suicide no matter how they tried to glorify it.

"Jyohaku-sama," she said, "Do you remember when I had a mental breakdown many years ago?"

He carefully watched her face.

"I think it's happening again."

They both heard a piercing scream outside the shrine. It faded sharply in the distance, faltering in its visceral quality like a prey being dragged into a hole. Jyohaku and Kagome went stock-still. Seconds later, someone came barging into the room.

"Kagome-sama, have you seen the priest?!" Amari's face was pale, her voice terror-stricken. "Oh."

"Kirihata, what happened outside?" Jyohaku strode forward urgently.

"It's Hana-sama!" Amari said, shaking with tears, "She fell down the long stairs!"

Kouhei was already at her side when they rushed over. Hana was still conscious, her body bent in a foetal position as she breathed shallowly like a dying animal, her eyes stark wide.

Jyohaku dashed down beside Kouhei. "What in seven hells—how did this happen? Kouhei, have you called the ambulance?"

"Yes, I did. Nobody saw what happened—we just heard the scream outside, and Amari and I discovered her like this," Kouhei said.

"Alright, don't move her." Jyohaku knelt close to Hana. "Hana, can you hear us? Can you speak?"

"Gods, I don't know what's happening," Amari wept behind Kagome's shoulder. "There was nobody outside. She just _fell_."

Kagome stood still away from the men. She stared down at Hana's body. She looked so small and vulnerable, sprawled at the bottom of the stairs, all her viciousness lost.

A sudden gust of wind came blowing up through the stairs, rustling through the trees and scattering the dead leaves. It was a cold wind, one that reached and chilled deep into her bones. Her own voice came howling back into her ears.

 _"...what I would do to make her trip and roll down the stairs!"_

Kagome backed a step away. In just one day, two of her wishes had been granted.

* * *

"...about your great news?"

She lifted her head. The static roar at the back of her mind slowly dissipated. Suddenly she was at her family home, eating with Mama and Souta at the dining table. Sesshoumaru was beside her.

They were looking at her with smiling, expectant faces.

She tried to arrange her thoughts, but it felt like she had just awakened from being submerged in a tub of ice.

"...What?" she said, looking at her family in confusion, then at Sesshoumaru.

"Your ordainment ceremony," Sesshoumaru whispered. It had been his voice she heard when she was plucked out from her reverie.

"Oh," she said. Her thoughts began to swim back into her consciousness, piercing together a coherent image. Of course, that's what he meant by the good news.

Kagome smiled at her family. "Yes, guess what. I'm finally graduating from my apprenticeship, Mama. I'm becoming a ranked priestess at the Yukino Shrine."

"Oh thank the gods!" Mrs Higurashi exclaimed, bursting into happiness. "That's the best thing I've heard!"

"Congratulations, sis!" Souta said. "You don't know how happy I am for you, really!" They began to sing praises for her. Kagome embraced her family warmly.

"There's another thing," Kagome said. She glanced at Sesshoumaru with a smile. "We've been looking for a new house recently, and we finally got the one we wanted. We'll be moving in soon after the renovations. Mama, Souta, I hope to see you all for my house-warming party."

Her family was brimming with so much happiness for her. Kagome carried her smile back into the car when they left, where it began to fade slightly.

As they drove past the roads back home, she couldn't stop massaging her temples to nurse her throbbing headache. It started two months ago, right around that time when Hana had that freak accident.

The doctors at the hospital said her spine was dislocated from the impact. It was likely she would never walk again.

Until now, nobody knew how it happened. Hana wouldn't speak about it. Kagome and Jyohaku had viewed the CCTV footage from the shrine entrance. She shuddered as she remembered.

Hana was seen edging towards the stairs alone, where she simply tipped over and fell, almost to her death. It was as though someone was beckoning her at the bottom of the steps, and she had taken a careless trip.

A dizzying sequence of events transpired soon after one another. Sesshoumaru abruptly expressed interest in buying a new house.

"Oh, there's nothing wrong with the house," he said, sipping a cup of coffee before his laptop. "But it belongs to the shrine, no? And I don't see why we should pay rent when we can afford our own house."

"Oh, we can afford our own house now?" Kagome asked in surprise. "But I don't see you out at work nowadays. You're always at home on your laptop."

"I've acquired a new interest. Stock-trading."

"You're pulling my leg, aren't you?"

"No, Kagome," he said, looking at her in the eye. "Did you honestly think I bought the car with remunerations from my modelling stints?"

They had spent some weeks looking at new homes in the heart of town. Luxurious houses she would never even dream of stepping inside. But Sesshoumaru kept assuring her not to worry and to take her pick. So she picked one.

And then, her upcoming ordainment ceremony in two weeks. Kagome was bobbing in a large ocean, tumbling with the current. She was gasping for air, trying to stay afloat as the waves crashed around her, her body flinging here and there as the gods liked.

And finally Hana's scream, languishing in its blood-curdling descent never really left her, haunting her sleeping dreams.

 _Why don't you just die and go back to hell?_

 _Oh Kagome, we're already in hell._

"Isn't it great?" Sesshoumaru suddenly spoke. Kagome turned to look. He was smiling in his driver's seat, a Patek Philippe watch glittering on his wrist. The smell of Creed Aventus lingered in the car as the Lexus cruised smoothly into the highway.

 _Where are we?_ she wanted to ask him. _How did we get here?_

"Everything is going well just like you wanted, Kagome."

Kagome watched him intently. She remembered a piece of advice someone once gave her, something about the dangers of wielding power, but she couldn't remember it in its entirety.

She turned back to the windscreen and watched the whizzing roads pass by with a dispirited eye.

"Yes," she said.

 _To be continued..._

 _[A/N: Although I have the storyboard roughly drafted, it would be interesting to hear from my readers what they predict would happen, and how this fic ends. Send me your PMs! =D]_


	29. Arc 4: Ordainment

**_Warning: Some lemon in this chapter, do not read if you're at work *winks*_**

 **Ordainment**

 _Magoichi, leader of the Saika Ikki, snarled._

 _"There, northwest towards the swamps! Gather in your formations! Spot its shimmering coat!"_

 _The foot soldiers assembled in a long row side-by-side, their deadly long arquebuses peeking from their lacquered shields. They pressed on their triggers, their magic-infused gunpowder exploding._

 _It sounded like fireworks going off in Sesshoumaru's ears, and then felt like fireworks in his hind legs._

 _His chest wound had been leaking copious amounts of blood from his previous injuries, his weakening body stumbling through the thick foliage, unable to maintain his form any longer. His vision was getting cloudy at the edges._

 _You must not lose consciousness, you must not—_

 _His thoughts escaped with the wind. His canine form devolved, shrinking into his anthropomorphic self. His legs died first, and he collapsed head-first into the mud._

 _Eons passed. A pair of boots treaded into the murky swamp with a slow, purposeful gait. It stopped beside his head._

 _Sesshoumaru was only slightly aware, a hazy trepidation trickling at the back of his mind. Magoichi pulled him by his hair._

 _"Where is she?" he demanded, his breath hot on his skin. His voice rose when he was met with silence. "Where did you take my wife?"_

 _He released Sesshoumaru and his head dropped back into the mud. Magoichi unslung his arquebus from his shoulder. His gun had been specially blessed by a powerful yamabushi, or an ascetic hermit from the mountains. He directed his muzzle at the daiyoukai's face._

 _"Listen, demon," he said quietly. "I'm this close to blowing your brains out. You filthy pack of monsters, scrounging on our holy land. What did you do to Rin?"_

 _Sesshoumaru blinked. He had dirt slowly seeping into his eye. His irises were no longer of sharp, glimmering gold. They were now the dirty colour of mud._

 _"In which order do you want to know?" he finally answered. His voice was clear and collected. Magoichi clicked on his safety clamp._

 _"I saved Rin, by squeezing the life out of her body. To remember her, I feasted on her heart. And then to honour her, I build her a bridge and cast her in its stone."_

 _Magoichi stilled, as a hot flush of emotions arrested his face. His finger shook._

 _"It is what she would have wanted," Sesshoumaru said._

 _"You son of a devil—"_

 _And he pulled his trigger._

* * *

The fire lanterns burnt spiritedly in the night.

Kagome stood in the large courtyard on the entrance grounds of Yukino-jingu. An altar had been erected for her before the shrine. Her stance, upright and unwavering, was as stiff as the new layers of _seisō_ she had adorned specially for the ceremony. She bowed down in deference, her wooden _shaku_ clasped tightly at her abdomen.

The shrine committee sat in a large group by the sides with a watchful gaze. The musical procession carried on, their solemn thudding of their drums echoing. Her colleagues held their breaths as they witnessed her. The head priest wiped his misty eyes.

And on the other side sat Kagome's family. Mrs Higurashi and her son had their hands clasped together as they bit their lips in excitement. Sesshoumaru sat quietly beside them, his arms folded.

He watched her profile intently as she bowed to the altar, his eyes slowly taking in her new form; a freshly-minted priestess.

Her _reiki_ burned brighter than ever, almost obscuring the lantern flames. Only he could see it.

And even though she was not supposed to, Kagome looked over her shoulder and gave him a smile.

Sesshoumaru nodded in acknowledgement.

* * *

"It's such a shame we couldn't bring the phonograph," Kagome lamented, as she carried the boxes containing her clothes into their bedroom. Their new bedroom.

The Western-style bungalow overlooked a scenic stretch of the Arakawa River. Prior to moving in, weeks ago Kagome had paid a visit to a few houses lining beside hers—all her new neighbours. Most of them were foreign expatriates and they were more than happy to get acquainted.

They also didn't seem to be particularly perturbed by her 'husband's' appearance.

"Good," Kagome had said, walking back to their house that was currently undergoing plumbing works. "No one seems to recognise you as Amess Horusu. And they don't look like the nosy kind too. I told you this was a good environment to stay in."

"It's slightly further from your workplace however."

"It's alright—I just need to wake up a bit earlier."

Sesshoumaru smirked in reply.

Now that their renovations were done, they could finally enter their new house without worrying of tripping over buckets of cement and knocking into hanging electrical wires.

The interiors beheld a minimalist, Scandinavian style. Kagome had scoured through the Internet until late nights to search on complementing furniture.

She twirled around her living room, dancing in her dream home.

"We can always buy a new phonograph," Sesshoumaru said, helping her with the boxes.

"Yeah I guess. But the way the old one reverberates through the floor probably won't be the same, would it?"

She walked into the kitchen, running her hands along the smooth marble countertop. She eyed her new shiny stove hungrily.

"I love what they did to the kitchen. I can't wait to start cooking."

Perrching her hands on her hips, she began to imagine the wonders. Sesshoumaru came in after a while. There was a small window by the sink, showcasing a quiet view of the Arakawa flowing outside.

He scrunched his nose. He didn't really like the idea of a passing river by the house. People threw things into rivers, dirty things. Things that could cause havoc in homes. But he didn't tell her, of course. She was already in love with the house—and he wouldn't spoil it with his superstitious sentiments.

Sesshoumaru approached Kagome from behind, and caught her small waist. He nuzzled her neck, hinting her of his thoughts. Kagome squirmed coquettishly against him.

"Should we perform a purification ritual in this spot?" he murmured in her ear.

"Sesshoumaru, you're so _bad_." She whimpered when his hand snaked under her dress.

"Don't act coy. You've been looking at empty corners and thinking of it since we arrived in the house."

Sesshoumaru propped her to sit at the edge of the counter. He spread her legs wide, keeping his hand firm on her thigh.

Kagome threw back her head and bit back a little moan when that hand slowly smoothed its way up her.

"We should go to Europe for a holiday," she said, her voice getting tight in her throat. "We could fly to Spain. Then we take a train further up to France, maybe even Switzerland."

"Europe?" Sesshoumaru repeated. He caressed her thigh slowly down to her calf, ankle and lastly her sole, warming her up. Then his fingers brushed against her underwear. "Like one of your new year resolutions?"

She jerked from his touch. She was already damp, and his sly smile told her he already knew that.

"How did you know about my resolutions?"

"I accidentally read your old diary. It was a long time ago." He rubbed her more boldly now, teasing her plump nether lips and her swelling clit through the sodden cloth.

Kagome clenched her jaw. "How _dare_ you."

"What else did you write?" Sesshoumaru knelt down, meeting the heated apex between her thighs. He leaned forward to catch her scent, burying his nose in. Such a delectable smell; his Kagome was ovulating. "Something about losing weight and getting a boyfriend."

A laugh shivered from her. "Well, I can strike those two out now. I lost a few pounds when I got sick."

"And a boyfriend?" Sesshoumaru said, peering up at her. He pulled down her underwear swiftly. "So you have a boyfriend now, Kagome?"

Her heavy-lidded eyes met the ambiguous look in his gaze. She couldn't decide if he was serious. "Aren't you?"

"I'm insulted," Sesshoumaru remarked quietly, kissing the flesh inches from where she wept, "that you could call me as such. The term drips with much frivolity."

Kagome watched him, her breath caught in her chest. Her fingers dug through his silken hair. When his hot mouth finally caught her where she wanted him, she expelled out a throaty cry.

"Then what are you?"

"Your soulmate," he answered with utter conviction. As though it was the most obvious thing in the world. "We could be anywhere, with anyone else, but our fates will always wind us back to each other."

She wondered how he did it. His lips and tongue were busy, working up a maddening spell—or was it a curse?— into her but he could still enunciate his thoughts so concisely.

 _Did it occur to you that maybe it's because he's just not human?_

"Silly," she tried to laugh. Oh it was hard to even speak—not when he was wreaking havoc on her nerves, devilry in her senses and she was rocking herself wantonly to his face—"Why would I want to be with anyone else?"

"The day cuts off the promise of the night. You should be careful with the things you say, Kagome."

"No, I only want you," she cried, straddling his shoulders desperately, teetering on the brink of orgasm.

"Then swear on it."

Kagome let out a strangled cry as the tight knot in her womb finally relented to his arduous pursuit of her pleasure. Her relief crashed upon her sweet and liberating. The corners of her eyes darkened, her soul slipping somewhere.

His skin was seared by her powerful burst of _reiki_. The kitchen was thus purified, in his words.

Sesshoumaru stood up. He straightened her dress and kissed her damp forehead. Then he looked in her eyes, still soulless, and rubbed her cheek fondly with his thumb.

"So you want to go to Europe?"

* * *

Amari and Kagome waited at the security post. A small company in the industrial areas had called them for a _harae_ appointment to bless their new work premises. While Kagome was now authorized to lead her own rituals, she was also required to bring along an assistant. Amari had dutifully tagged her.

The security guard was missing from the post. They couldn't enter the building without being granted clearance. The two ladies hung outside, waiting despondently.

"Should we call someone from the company to pick us up?" Amari suggested.

"Let's just wait for awhile," Kagome said.

Amari sat and sighed on the curb by the roadside.

"Kagome-sama. How does it feel, now that you're an actual priestess?" she wondered aloud. "You can do a lot of things now and it always means you have tons of responsibilities."

"Oh, I'm loving it so far," Kagome replied, smiling. "Having an added sense of responsibility is what drives me."

Amari pouted. "Why? Is it not enough being a simple _miko_?"

A few lines creased on Kagome's forehead. She sat down beside Amari by the road, ignoring how improper they appeared.

"A _miko_ now is not the same as a _miko_ hundred of years ago. In the olden days we were like shamans, able to communicate with the gods, and we were revered by the people. Now, a _miko_ 's role is only menial. I want to be more than that. And why not? I know I have the potential inside me to be better."

Amari looked at her friend. Kagome had changed ever since the ceremony. She had always been a hard worker who strived hard, but now she seemed to hold her head even higher, and constantly looking for more areas to succeed in.

Amari felt small sitting beside her.

"Do you want to be like Jyohaku-sama? And be a head priestess?"

Kagome considered it. "That would be the best. But you know how it's like in Yukino-jingu, being a family shrine..."

And they both said it together: "You have to get married into it!"

The two ladies laughed. "Ah, do you remember the good old days when Hana-sama tried to do just that?" Amari reminisced.

Kagome played with the pleats on her _hakama_. She didn't really want to talk about Hana.

"You know Kouhei and I visited her at the rehabilitation centre some time ago," Amari continued. "I didn't know she had a big family. Her lone mother has to support her four siblings now, and they're all still in school."

"That's really unfortunate to hear," Kagome said tersely. "By the way, Amari-chan. I haven't been to the Family Mart near my old house since I moved. How's your brother doing?"

"Oh he didn't tell you?" Amari said, shocked. "He got transferred to another store in a different town months ago. He doesn't live around that area anymore."

"Oh," Kagome said. " _Oh_."

Amari glanced down her lap with a pensive expression. "I don't know what happened to him. He only told me _after_ he left. I'm still mad at him for missing my birthday party. He didn't show up even though he promised, and he never called me to apologise. I haven't talked to him for a long while."

Kagome looked away, a misplaced sense of guilt harbouring inside her. She remembered their last meeting wasn't really the most civil.

"If you do see him, tell me if he's alright," she said. "That's all I need to know."

Amari sighed again. "I don't know. My brother has always been the odd one out in the family, always isolating himself. I thought meeting a girl would change him at least."

The security guard suddenly appeared behind them. He bowed in apology countless of times before granting them their clearance.

Kagome glanced at Amari beside her. "Well, are you ready, Amari-chan?"

Amari looked at the building and took a deep breath.

"Let's go."

* * *

"This is hands-down, the greatest home-cooked meal I've ever eaten, Amess. What is in this chicken?"

"Coq Au Vin, one of the most popular French dishes," Sesshoumaru answered, cutting a piece of his own meal. "Formerly a poor man's food, it literally means, "rooster in wine." I hope that answers your question, Morikawa."

Morikawa gawked at his plate. "You're kidding me. I've only been to two or three French restaurants, but this is something else. You cook even better than Eri."

"There's an international market nearby catered for the large foreign community here. I just took a random pick from the map," Sesshoumaru replied. "And your wife would be offended if she heard what you said."

"But it's the truth. She's only good for spending my money. Do you know that she holds three credit cards under my name?"

Morikawa then eyed the expansive ceiling of which a glass chandelier hung, before turning around to observe the living room, slack-jawed. Even before he entered, he had been staggered right outside the gate.

That pair of _komainu_ statues that greeted him. Their stone-cast eyes were glaring at him menacingly.

And why did Amess have these lion-dogs guarding his house anyway? He knew his partner was a priestess, but they didn't _live_ in a shrine. They weren't in Okinawa either, where these lion-dogs statues were a plenty.

He remembered that seed of envy being planted in him as Sesshoumaru invited him in. He was blatantly conscious of himself. Morikawa was wide-eyed, gaping like a kid in a zoo. He wasn't an art dealer but he knew an expensive painting when he saw one.

How was he able to afford all of this? How did Amess suddenly amassed all this wealth?

And here he was, having dinner at his subordinate's house and the man had cooked a meal that even he couldn't deny was sinfully good.

Morikawa gripped his cutlery.

"You know, Longines just approached our agency. They're launching their new Masterclass collection, and they'll need someone for their commercial shoot—"

"Ah, which reminds me," Sesshoumaru said, looking up. "There's a reason why I invited you for dinner today, Morikawa."

Sesshoumaru got up from his seat and left the dining area. Before Morikawa could wonder, he promptly returned. A white envelope was placed beside his plate.

Morikawa stared blankly at it.

Sesshoumaru continued to tuck into his meal. "I'm tendering," he said, as his fork slipped a piece of the wine-infused meat into his lips.

Morikawa's rage came slowly, creeping like tendrils around his reddening face. This was it. He had been on edge since he came here. The hat had finally been dropped.

"You have to be out of your mind," he blew under his breath. "You're already lined up for a few projects. There's a hefty penalty fee to be incurred—"

"I'll write you a blank cheque, if that solves anything," Sesshoumaru replied stoically.

"You're serious, aren't you, Amess? Remember how hard you fought to be where you are right now sitting here. I was the one who discovered you and made you who you are."

"You humour me, Morikawa. I never wished to be a top model. This was _your_ fight to save your crumbling agency." Sesshoumaru wiped his mouth with a napkin calmly. "Also, I'm upset to say the least that you would think my sitting here is due to your benevolence. A rather conceited way of thinking, don't you agree?"

Morikawa dragged himself out from the chair, his body swaying, and hurled his napkin onto the table. His spittle sprayed from his mouth. "You ingrate!"

"Did my rooster intoxicate you already? Steady, Morikawa. You're a guest here."

"You forget your old bearings!" Morikawa further bellowed, rocking on his heels. "You were just a drifting nobody, a nameless immigrant in this country! _I_ gave you a name. _I_ gave you a job. And this is how you repay me?"

"Tch," Sesshoumaru went, steepling his fingers. "I always thought Amess Horusu was a terrible, terrible name."

Morikawa slammed his hand onto the table. It left a damp, sweaty handprint on the cherry wood. He pointed a shaking pink finger towards Sesshoumaru.

"Listen, I have some connections to the Yakuza. I can easily make your life hell here. You'll never step out of your house. You...and your woman..."

Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes at him. "I'm sure you would, wouldn't you?" He stood up and cleared his plate. "And with that I declare that dinner is suspended. I suppose you're not staying for desserts."

Morikawa spewed a curse-word at him. Sesshoumaru merely shrugged. "It's such a pity. I made pear tarte tatin. We have a beautiful pear tree growing in our garden."

Morikawa turned and made his way out of the door, his breaths heaving with unbridled anger. He collided into Kagome at the entrance.

"Ah, Mr Morikawa! Long time no see!" she greeted him cheerfully. "Sesshoumaru did say you were coming over."

He pushed her away. "Better lock your doors before you sleep," he warned. Then he stumbled out of the front gate.

Kagome stepped slowly into the kitchen, flabbergasted.

"What on earth was that?"

"He always misbehaves when he gets drunk," Sesshoumaru replied matter-of-factly, washing the dishes at the sink. He glanced at Kagome who had just reached home from work.

"Speaking of which—do you like pears, Kagome?"

* * *

Eri punched '15' on the lift buttons. She lived in a condominium with her husband who was twice her age. And she was starting to regret her fast lifestyle. Even all the money in the world couldn't satisfy her. What's the point? Her boyfriend had just left her for a club hostess.

She exited the lift quickly only to knock into a man who was entering. He didn't look like anyone she knew from the 15th floor. But she shrugged it off and walked to her apartment door.

She saw her husband's shoes at the entrance. "Honey, are you home already?" she voiced. It was 3 in the morning. Of course he had to be home. The living room was empty so she headed for the bedroom. "Honey, one of your cards just got defaulted—"

Eri screamed. Her husband was hanging from the ceiling, his limp body swaying heavily from its weight.

She didn't have to see his face to know he was dead.

 _To be continued…_


	30. Hound Dog

**A/N: Hola guys! I need to point out something. While doing research for this fic, I found out there's a difference between a miko and a priestess. In modern context, a miko is really more like an assistant in a shrine, with mostly young part-timers taking the job. A priestess is the female counterpart of a priest, with more religious duties.**

 **Kagome progressed from a simple miko to a priestess in this fic, however as I was unaware of the difference in these two terms initially, I made it sound like she wanted to be an actual miko in the early chapters, when she already was one. *sighs as I need to edit old chapters***

 **Okay enough of babbling. XD**

 **Hound Dog**

Jyohaku slowed down his pace. He could feel sweat pooling on his back, his socks damp. He stopped completely on the pathway, bending over to catch his breath, and spied a glance at his watch. He had covered five kilometres in forty mins. Only five kilometres and he already felt like busting a lung.

He smiled wryly to himself.

 _You're really a long way behind Onizuka the Terrible_ , he told himself. Jyohaku straightened his back with a crack, and brushed back his unruly hair. He pulled out his Airpods from his ears—he had been listening to an Elvis Presley album which was his mother's music, and therefore good music—and took his water bottle that he had strapped to himself.

His sweaty hand slipped, and the bottle bounced on the ground, rolling into the grass.

"Oh come on," he said in disbelief, trying to pursue his runaway bottle, like a kid who had kicked his ball too hard on the road. He couldn't believe it, his bottle was winning, crossing into an adjacent path in the park until it slowed down near a man's feet.

The man picked it up. Jyohaku caught up to him, huffing.

"Yours?" the person said. The yellow lamplight cut a hazy picture of his face, but Jyohaku recognized him immediately.

"Wait, I know you," Jyohaku voiced out, pointing a finger. "You're… You're Higurashi's _boyfriend_."

Sesshoumaru curled his lip in subtle display of revolt. He had a pure distaste for the word.

"No, not that. Such dysfunctional relationships should be left for the whimsical."

"Whimsical, eh. Strangely I agree with you."

"You're the head priest of Yukino Shrine."

"Indeed...you're talking to the man."

"Truthfully I've never seen a priest run for sport before. What is that saying—health is wealth?"

Jyohaku wasn't sure if it was the low chatter of the evening wind against the rustling trees, but the man was quietly laughing.

"Can I have my bottle already?" Jyohaku said, looking at it still in his hand. He couldn't put a finger to it, but there was a subtle sense of déjà vu in the way he uneased him.

"Of course, head _priest_ ," Sesshoumaru said, "of all the things you became…"

"What?" Jyohaku rose his voice.

"Here, take it," he said.

Jyohaku retrieved his bottle, frowning as he uncapped it. He turned and took a hearty swig. His drink was an invigorating relief, more delicious than he remembered, cooling his parched throat and chest like blessed rain during a long drought.

He wiped the corner of his mouth and almost choked on himself. "Bloody hell," he muttered, his eyes darting around. Sesshoumaru was gone, disappeared with no trace in his surroundings.

The evening wind came again. Jyohaku rubbed the rise of goosebumps on his arms. He strapped his bottle back securely, and replaced his Airpods on his ears. Then he continued to run, all the while listening to Elvis as he sang to "Hound Dog".

~*.*.*~

As if someone had willed her to, Kagome snapped out of her dreams. She woke up alone in bed, drenched in a cold sweat. Her heart was threatening to burst from her ribcage.

Again the same nightmare. Again the clock glowed a green 03:15.

A deep forest of towering trees. She was running in sheer desperation, her bare feet bleeding from thorns. She didn't know who, or what exactly, but an oppressive sense of doom was pursuing her from behind.

A bloodhound howled balefully somewhere, crying.

She could feel the fingers of a black, shifting mass creeping at the nape of her neck. And when it scraped her with its long talons she would scream in her dreams but it wasn't her voice—it was Hana's.

Shrill, piercing, visceral. The way she screamed when she tripped over the stairs.

 _Oh Kagome, we're already in hell!_

 _Is this hell?_ Kagome contemplated in the dark, pawing at her shuddering face desperately. She was conscious now, she was not dreaming.

 _What if I already died sometime ago and I'm just living through the motions?_

She landed back into the mattress, trying to collect her breaths. Her nostrils flared. There was a sweet aroma wafting in softly into her room.

It was the fragrance of pears.

"Pears!" Amari exclaimed in the pantry the next morning. "Where did you get a load of these pears, Kagome-sama?"

"And they smell so good too," Kouhei said, sniffing one appreciatively.

Kagome had gone to work, distributing pears to her peers by the box. She twisted her mouth. The reason behind her generosity wasn't really as well-meaning as she wished.

"We have a large pear tree in our garden. The fruits rot very fast once they hit the ground," she explained. "Sesshoumaru has been making pear-everything. Pear pastries, pear salads, pear jams. Even onigiri with pickled pear. You name it, he's done it." She shook her box, of which a few of them remained and rolled all over. "God, I'll throw up if I see another of these."

The head priest passed by Kagome sullenly, brushing by her. He went to the coffee machine and selected a double-shot expresso.

Amari and Kouhei eyed each other warily. He had appeared suddenly from nowhere, and from the looks of it, might have awakened from the wrong side of the bed.

"Morning, Jyohaku-sama," Kagome greeted, her politeness only but perfunctory. "Do you want some pears?"

Jyohaku sipped on his cup, eyeing her box. She waited until he swallowed his coffee properly.

"I love pears," he stated with all the cheeriness of the world.

"Great, you can take this lot with you then," she said, pushing the box to him.

Good riddance, she then thought, dusting her hands off. Her mission to do away with those pears was accomplished. Of course it was not completely over. This was just this week's harvest.

"Do you have rice crackers too?" Jyohaku went as she was just leaving. He held his box like a gift. "They're my next favourite things."

Kagome cringed over her shoulder. "Rice crackers? I hate those. They're salty little things," she said. "You have disgusting taste in food."

Amari and Kouhei froze, their spoons half-way into their mouths.

Jyohaku's face was blank at first as he registered Kagome's words. Then he closed his eyes and started to chuckle slowly, his chest rumbling with deep laughter.

"You would hate anything I liked, wouldn't you, Higurashi?"

Kouhei sighed as a shouting tirade started to ensue between both warring parties. "Really, it's like they were sworn enemies in their past lives."

A cobalt-blue Jaguar skimmed by the road curbs alongside where Kagome was walking after work. It slowed down to match her pace, a tinted window lowering.

"Hello," Sesshoumaru said from inside.

"Alright," Kagome said, closing the door after her and pulling in her seatbelt. She inhaled deeply, taking in the smell of new leather. "Where's the old car?"

"It's resting at home," Sesshoumaru said, and continued his drive. He smoothed his hand against his steering wheel. "I always wanted to have a feel of a continental car."

"One does not buy a Jaguar for that reason alone. Really Sesshoumaru. You should stop spending so much money."

"Rest assured. There's not a single dent in my pocket you can find," he mused. "What were you doing out in the streets? You were roaming quite lifelessly."

"Just trying to take a breath of fresh air," Kagome told him. "How about you? You didn't tell me you were back in Japan. Hence me, roaming around the streets quite lifelessly."

She observed the sleek high-tech dashboard. Already a few pieces had adorned its top, a series of small, intricate metallic sculptures—a replica of the Eiffel Tower, a horse in mid-gallop among other things. There was a soldier mounted on it. _Napoleon Bonarparte_ , she could hear Sesshoumaru's voice whisper in her head.

"You know, you haven't exactly told me what's there's at Cayman Islands." She remembered the note he had left two days ago on the fridge. _'Going on a work trip to Cayman Islands',_ it said. _'Please finish the pear desserts in the fridge.'_

"I was visiting a banker friend. Do you know you can go swimming with stingrays there?"

"That sounds almost lovely, but I'm not sure if I want to. So what are you now, Sesshoumaru?"

"Just a humble philanthropist," he answered with a not-so-humble smirk. "I've always been an investor in a sense. Now I am sowing monetary funds for a humanitarian cause."

" _A humanitarian cause?_ And what benefits exactly are we reaping?" Should she even be surprised by him anymore?

"One that can change the world."

"Does it have anything to do with your dreams of world dominance?"

"Oh, so you _do_ remember. I'm impressed."

She rested her head by the window. "You've gone so far ahead."

"You too, Kagome. You've gone very far," he said. "Just a little more."

"There's more?"

"You can be the head priestess if you wish."

Her fine eyebrows knitted slightly. "The shrine observes a family succession system. It's not that simple."

"On the contrary," Sesshoumaru disagreed. "I believe it's too simple. Be honest with me—have you ever considered that position?"

"Yes, of course," Kagome admitted. "It's only natural to want to progress higher."

Sesshoumaru nodded, as if he had ascertained something. "I've already predicted you would."

She took a deep breath. She didn't want to talk about work. The dark, tall shadows of trees dappled on her face as they passed by her. Should she tell him? She should, shouldn't she? Now felt like a good time.

After all soulmates don't hide anything from each other.

"Sesshoumaru…" she began slowly, "For months I keep being haunted by the same nightmare—"

"It's seven o'clock," Sesshoumaru interrupted. He reached forward to the stereo set. "Time for the headlines."

She watched him in surprise as he switched on the FM radio, increasing its volume. Didn't he hear a word she said?

The news was blaring now, filling the space in the car. Kagome shifted in her seat and looked out of the windows. More trees. They seemed to get barren as they passed. Their long naked branches were akin to bony fingers, reaching out towards the grey, dullish sky.

The newscaster's voice evolved into a monotonous drone in her head.

"…with the situation here in Eastern Cape, South Africa worsening as the yet-unnamed terrorist group launches its first series of bombings in the region, just a few days prior to the UN General Assembly taking place…"

A painful ache appeared on her temples. It seemed to pulse on a regular rhythm and Kagome was left anticipating its every throb. Gods, she thought, shutting her eyes, not again…

"...in local news, the Tokyo police has confirmed the identity of the suicide victim as Tetsuo Morikawa, who was rumoured to have hung himself in his house last Friday. Tetsuo Morikawa was the manager of SK Entertainment, one of the top talent agencies in Tokyo…"

Kagome shot upright in her seat. It couldn't be Mr Morikawa, could it? They just saw him last Friday. Sesshoumaru had cooked dinner and she had even exchanged a few words with him.

He couldn't have gone home to suddenly kill himself. It didn't make sense.

"Morikawa...threatened you as well, didn't he?" Sesshoumaru said.

She turned to him in shock. But his face was blasé, focused on the roads ahead. She tried to mouth something for a few words to reach him, but at that moment he seemed so far away.

"Morikawa was a good manager. A few shortcomings, but otherwise, good," he said. "It's unfortunate things had to end this way."

He switched off the radio. It was starting to drizzle outside so the windscreen wipers were activated. The droplets of rain streaked on the glass. Kagome sank deeper into the small corner by the window.

"By the way, I hope you finished the desserts in the fridge just as I asked you to, Kagome. Because pears," Sesshoumaru emphasised with a smile, "pears will be good for you now."

 _To be continued..._

A/N: There's going to be a lot of pears in this arc.


	31. Put Your Head On My Shoulder

A/N: Thank you for all your reviews! I'm as bashful as a red-faced Amari reading all of your speculations. Some of you suspect Kagome is pregnant because of Sesshy's comment on her ovulation and because he's been stuffing her with pears. I'm so sorry, but the truth is… it was just a passing observation during foreplay...and now I feel disappointed with myself that my readers had anticipated a pregnancy. The truth with the pears is more disturbing than that. So mmm, to make it clear, Kagome is not pregnant.

Sesshoumaru is not attuned to his beastly origins (he doesn't care less about mating), and is more of a manifestation of a quiet, vengeful spirit in this fic.

Also I'm happy that some managed to deduce that Jyohaku is Naraku's reincarnation (spoiler if you haven't figured it out). It was hinted early in Chapter 12 when Kagome mentioned about the priest in the train, and also explained why Sesshoumaru didn't intervene with his presence in Kagome's life…yet. Also, Onigumo/Onizuka. And rice crackers. I'm partial to Naraku so writing Jyohaku is always a joy.

Oh god, I said so much. Thank you so much for reading Binded thus far!

 **Put Your Head On My Shoulder**

Mind steep in meditation, her wooden rosary beads ticked through her clasped fingers as she sat subservient before the fox deities of Inari.

" _Please forgive your humble servant, and guide me a path from this darkness_ ," Kagome prayed.

 _Devote yourself completely_ , the foxes seemed to chant back at her. _Devote yourself to us._

Her concentration broke when a muffled series of shouting voices filtered in through the large, empty prayer hall. There was an argument taking place somewhere in the shrine, one that she could pick neither head nor tail. Kagome inhaled slowly, trying to quell her growing ire.

"What's that commotion about?" she demanded when she caught Kouhei and Amari by the corridors.

"It's that time of the _omiai_ season again," Amari went nonchalantly.

Kouhei explained. "Someone from the shrine committee came and brought a lady for the head priest to consider. To say that he was furious would be an understatement. I think there's a hole in the wall now."

"It's the same thing every year. I wish Jyohaku-sama would just pick someone to marry and spare my torment already," Amari anguished.

Kouhei grinned. "I can _help_ to ease your torment."

"Sheesh, Kouhei-kun."

Kagome glowered quietly. "Tell the priest Yukino-jingu is a holy shrine, not a fighting ring. Also if he truly doesn't care about the future of this place, then he's welcome to continue his picky and selfish ways."

Kouhei bristled under her seething glare. "Err, shouldn't _you_ be the one to tell him that?"

She snapped at him. "What makes you think I haven't?"

Amari and her partner burst in relief as she finally strode past them.

"Kagome-sama has really changed after becoming a priestess, hasn't she?" Amari whispered. "She's really scary now."

"Not really," Kouhei said. "She already changed a while before that."

"On another note, Jyohaku-sama is almost forty. He really needs to think about an heir for his next succession."

"Speak of the devil. Here he comes."

They pretended to read a hanging scroll on the wall as the head priest came charging in like a bull.

"Have any of you seen Higurashi?" he bellowed. "I _told_ her not to invite those bloodsuckers in."

"She just passed by. I think you can still catch her," Kouhei said. "But she's mad at you though. And I mean, positively mad."

Jyohaku appeared baffled. "When is she not mad?"

They watched as the priest managed to catch Kagome at the end of the long corridor and waited for the heated exchange of blows, but it never came—in fact they merely spoke some words and continued walking along.

"You know, you could kill a lot of birds with one stone if the priest…" and then Kouhei glanced at Amari and said, "Oh, never mind."

"What, Kouhei-kun?"

"We should really go watch a movie after work one day. Just the both of us."

Amari sighed. "Seriously, I thought you were about to say something poignant."

"Eh? So me asking you out is not poignant enough?"

* * *

Jyohaku tilted his face in the mirror, the straight edge of his shaving knife angled on his foam-slathered jaw. He skimmed the sharp blade deftly against his skin, cutting through the five o'clock shadow.

Barely moving his lips, he sung a mirthless tune.

He was going out to drink. He mentally sifted through his wardrobe. Something nice to wear, something that would look good...

Jyohaku caught his eyes in his mirror reflection and felt instantaneously, a twinge of self-loathing. He cursed himself.

"What are _you_ so happy about?"

There was a soft mew at his feet. He glanced down to see one of his cats weaving through his legs. Its tortoise-shell fur brushed warmly against him.

"Oh it's you, Shippo-chan," he muttered. He looked back at the mirror and continued to shave his face. "Give me a moment, let me finish—"

A sharp sudden pain stabbed him in his upper abdomen. It was white-hot, a twist of an invisible knife wrenching him deep in the gut. His body bowed over the sink as he let out a gasp, more in shock than in agony. Blood dribbled from his face, painting crimson dots against the porcelain.

The pain disappeared as fast as it had attacked. What was left was the cold sweat enveloping him. Jyohaku sank to his knees slowly, shuddering, a hand gripped on the sink bowl's edge.

Shippo stepped onto the blood-stained knife as he tottered towards his owner, his stubby legs leaving a trail of red paw-prints on the floor.

* * *

Kagome waited outside the _izakaya_ pub in a blue gingham dress. When she saw him she raised her arm and tapped on her watch.

"I had to feed my cats before coming here," Jyohaku explained. "All thirteen of them."

"Am I supposed to empathise with your lack of time management?"

They were familiar lines. Jyohaku effectively ignored her and pushed the door into the pub.

"Hey, if you're going to treat me for your promotion, you'll have to sound more sincere than that."

They managed to secure two seats at a table. The pub was designed in a traditional setting, and they removed their shoes before sitting down. Jyohaku requested for a gin and tonic on the rocks. Kagome ordered a Dry Asahi with some chicken karaage and sushi. "Weak," he had commented.

"I was forced to treat you," Kagome griped. "Therefore I'm not obliged to offer any sincerity."

"You could have just said no."

"Well, that's because…" she said, and his eyebrows perked in anticipation, "...right now you're my closest semblance to reality."

Jyohaku adjusted himself. "You're saying you think I'm _grounded_?"

Kagome shrugged. "Maybe your cynicism turned out to be a redeeming feature after all."

He pinched her nose hard. "I don't care if you're a priestess now. You're still going to get it from me."

She pulled back his aquiline nose. "And I don't care if you're _ever_ the head priest. I'm still going to retaliate."

Their food and drinks came. Jyohaku downed his glass and asked for another. Kagome studied him for the first time since they sat down. There was a band-aid on his jaw.

"Jyohaku-sama. Your face."

He fingered his jaw gingerly. "I cut myself while shaving."

"Is it going to leave a scar?"

"Probably."

They bit into their chicken and sushi. He asked if she minded if he had a smoke, and she shook her head. He lit up a cigarette.

"You know, I observe you've been immersing yourself in a lot of prayer lately. Even staying until late nights."

Kagome hesitated. "I'm trying to cleanse myself."

"Then maybe you should take a ritual bath at the nearby falls."

"I do that. Three times weekly."

Jyohaku tried to hide his perplexed look. It would be presumptuous to ask at this point why she would go that far—he had been only half-serious when he suggested the ritual bath. He quickly finished his cigarette.

"Anyway," he said, clearing his throat, "I saw your butler guy while I was jogging one time."

Kagome stopped. "Really?"

"He's an eccentric fellow, isn't he? But incredibly familiar." He took another sip of his drink. "I swear I met him somewhere."

"Maybe he was one of your opponents in the ring."

His face lit up. "Does he wrestle too?"

She couldn't stop the laugh bidding from her chest.

"Oh, you're making fun of me, aren't you?" Jyohaku growled.

"I'm sorry, but the look on your face," Kagome said breathless, patting her chest, "when you asked if he wrestled too…"

"Alright, I let you off this time," he chided, wagging his finger. He finished the rest of his gin and frowned. "Are you done now?"

Kagome bit her giggle, nodding. She wiped her eyes.

Jyohaku's face softened.

"I've almost forgotten how you sound when you laugh." He blew out his breath. "Listen, perhaps you're not comfortable with me, but you must talk to someone. Maybe get some therapy for your depression. It's really affecting not just your work, but the people around you. Do you know what I'm saying?"

She nodded weakly. "I'm sorry."

"No, don't apologise. I'm not scolding you. And _I'm_ sorry too, if I sound harsh. I just don't want you to feel like you're alone in this. Everyone cares about you."

 _I did. I did try to talk to Sesshoumaru, but…_

Kagome held her beer with both hands and gathered her thoughts.

"I just feel like things are happening too fast, and I can't keep up," she confided. "It feels like I'm a puppet, being pulled by strings. I'm having anxiety attacks every now and then and they're crippling me."

Jyohaku rubbed the band-aid on his jaw. "But haven't only good things been happening to you?"

"No, not all are good things," she revealed. "Despite everything, I'm still being haunted by nightmares of Hana."

"Hana?"

She nodded. "I… I wished for her to fall down the stairs and die. She didn't _die_ , but she can't walk now." Kagome's voice lowered to a shameful whisper. "You must think I'm a horrible person."

"No," Jyohaku said. "I've had worse thoughts of her. Don't worry about that."

"I'm sorry. And I'm sorry for saying sorry again. You must be bored listening to my silly ramblings." She ducked her head and peered up to him with glassy eyes. "But still, thank you Jyohaku-sama."

"Look, we're outside work now," he said, putting his palms flat on the table, a little too cheery. "And our titles are almost on par. I suppose we could drop the formalities outside. We should get reacquainted, on a first-name basis."

"I suppose," she said. He extended a hand.

"Narumi," Jyohaku said.

"Kagome." She clasped his large hand, gave it a little shake. She was met with his rakish grin.

"Nice to meet you, Kagome." She watched as he finished his fourth glass, a twinge on his face as he swallowed.

"Narumi," she tasted his name on her tongue.

"Yes."

"Are you drunk?"

"I'm not. Are you?"

She looked around the pub. She took in its thematic decorations and jovial patrons, breathing in the smell of fried food and alcohol. It was a complete break from her monotonous routine of work and home. And then her eyes landed on the man sitting before her, looking conventionally handsome in his blue chambray shirt, his hair combed back, face clean-shaven, band-aid on his jaw.

She shook her head. "I'm crystal-clear."

"Do you want me to send you home?" Jyohaku offered as they walked outside the pub. It was twenty degrees outside. Kagome pulled out her cardigan from her bag and draped it around her.

"It's alright. I drove here. Besides…"

"Besides?"

"Narumi."

"Yes?"

"Are you drunk?"

"I'm _not_. Are _you_?"

"Really? Then why don't you walk a straight line on the pavement?"

With a confident swagger his feet tried to align with the red bricks paving their way, but he wobbled heavily, almost crashing on a lamppost.

"Maybe _I_ should be driving you home instead," she nagged, pulling him upright.

Jyohaku laughed, and leaned back against the lamppost, his stubborn hair all ruffled up again. He smiled at her.

"Higurashi…"

"Kagome. We're on a first-name basis, remember?"

He rolled his eyes. "Kagome."

She looked at him over her shoulder. "Yes?"

"I just want you to know that whatever happened to Hana...wasn't your fault."

She tucked her hair behind her ear, her finger quivering slightly.

"We all hated Hana. We all had bad thoughts of her. But no one was responsible for her accident. She tripped and fell, that was it. Her own carelessness cost her gravely. And we're all devastated by it, in our own way."

Kagome bit her lip, trying to quell down her wavering voice."I know, I want to believe it…"

"Then believe it. There's nothing else you can doubt."

He could be drunk, but Jyohaku was dead resolute in his assurance. It was the one thing she needed at that point: a strong post to tether her disarrayed thoughts to. He didn't push her away when she knocked her head against him.

"Don't look at me," she urged. "I'm ugly when I cry."

"I know, I saw you once when I came to collect the cat. You were really hideous."

She hit his hard chest. "Idiot. Idiot priest."

He held her shoulder as she sobbed. When she didn't resist he wrapped her warmly with his large arms. Kagome was as frail as a doll, leaning against his broad figure.

Jyohaku hated crying women; in his experience they mostly brought conniving agendas. But he knew his subordinates well throughout the years, her foremost. Despite everything she was, Kagome Higurashi was genuine—a refreshing spring in a dessicated society caught up with appearances. And this bull-headed, ire-inducing little creature was pouring her heart out to him.

He leaned down to listen to the way she choked on her tears, a whiff of her scent catching his nose. There was something in the soft fragrance of her skin; it was sly but provoking. In that vague threshold between stupor and sobriety, the woman crying in his arms was _compelling_.

Jyohaku raised his head immediately. Two white discs were hanging on the night sky, white and rotund. He slowly realized he was looking at the moon. Shit, he thought. He was really drunk.

"On second thought, maybe you should send me home," he sighed.

* * *

"Welcome home," Sesshoumaru greeted her like he usually did.

Kagome stood under the _noren_ curtain. "It's past midnight. Are you're still baking?"

"Yes, it's past midnight," he replied, putting the pear slices on the pastry. "You should have been home an hour ago."

"I had to make an extra stop first."

"Did you enjoy yourself with the priest tonight?"

She watched as he placed the baking tray into the oven. She didn't have the heart to tell him she was getting sick of the fruit.

"We had a good talk," she said. "I think our relationship matured in a sense. He's not really a bad guy as I thought."

"All is in good order. Come here, Kagome."

She stood before him and he held the sides of her face carefully, as if inspecting her. He leaned in and inhaled deeply.

"You smell of alcohol…and him."

She felt a brief flash of guilt. That she had confided in someone else and not with her own partner. _We're soulmates, remember?_ his voice drilled in her.

"I…" she stammered.

Sesshoumaru calmly took a slice of pear from the plate. He placed it into her mouth. Kagome grimaced as her teeth gnashed against its flesh, its sweet juice bursting everywhere.

Then he kissed her, her face cradled gently in his hands. It was a different kind of kiss. It felt like he was tasting her, his tongue sweeping slowly and curiously on her palate. She whimpered in his mouth.

"You're almost ripe," he whispered. " _Just a little more_."

Kagome opened her eyes. Sesshoumaru was patting her cheek, looking at her quite affectionately like one would with a pet.

She wondered if she had imagined his words.

 _To be continued…_

 **PSA: Don't drink and drive, guys.**


	32. Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?

**Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?**

"I'm going to have a dark tan when we return back," Kagome fretted, as she squeezed the last drops of sunscreen on her bare arms. Beside her Sesshoumaru was quietly basking on his lounge chair under the summer sun, on the deck of _Angelus_ , a hazy view of Oshidomari Port behind them. Up ahead on the horizon lied a stretch of whaling ships.

He had on a pair of Prada sunglasses, and a _batik_ -printed shirt she had never seen before. She thought it was gaudy as hell.

"Are you still going to love me when I'm all dark and blotchy?" Kagome further languished in her superficial worries, and for a moment she entertained the idea of just settling in the cabin and see what the chef was up to.

Yesterday the chef had prepared fresh _fugu_ and _uni_ , a lethal combination of pufferfish and sea urchin on a single plate. She tried to omit from her mind the jarring detail of how Sesshoumaru had made her accompany her meal with— of all things—pear wine. She wanted to retch just remembering it. She tasted peach wine before, but pear wine was something else altogether—it was sweet and sickly and just awful in general.

Pears were following her all the way from Tokyo to that little island off the coast of Hokkaido.

It was the Golden Week in Japan. She had been granted two days of leave from work, and suggested the idea of flocking to one of those little islands up north where the summer was kinder.

They were in the middle of the sea, in a small private yacht belonging to an "acquaintance" (and god knows _who_ and _where_ Sesshoumaru had met him, for they were even being offered the complementary services, free of charge). It was quite windy, to the point where Kagome had stopped fetching her dropping hat. Maybe the sun was more merciful in this island, but it still dazzled brightly in her eyes and she beat herself again for leaving her sunglasses in the hotel.

The sea was calm, gently bobbing the anchored yacht on its waters. But what if—and this thought just jumped out to her from nowhere—what if there was a large whale, just cruising silently underneath their boat? What if the whale for its own reasons just decided to leap out from the sea surface, its majestic size blocking the sun, as it sprayed its long-withheld breath onto their exposed selves on the deck? They would be caught so off-guard they would probably die from the shock.

She looked at Sesshoumaru, rubbing her arms harder now. It was possible. There might just be a whale lurking underneath them, and they would never know.

"Do you even love me?" she wondered bitterly. "You know, you never actually told me that. Sesshoumaru. Come talk to me for awhile."

Sesshoumaru finally shifted his head to her. He smirked lightly under his sunglasses. "Yes?"

"I'm asking if… Oh never mind."

She felt like going back to the port, which was a mere ten-minute boat drive behind them. At least there was a multitude of things in Rishiri Island to distract her, not on this boat where she was stuck with the blinding sun, her apathetic partner and the imaginary whale beneath them.

"I'm not the least _concerned_ , if you turn dark and blotchy," Sesshoumaru replied. "I cannot be _concerned_ with such trivial things."

"So will you still love me?"

Sesshoumaru lifted his shades and rose from his chair. He watched her for a moment, like an apex predator studying its oblivious prey, and Kagome pretended that her only care in the world then was her empty sunscreen bottle. She rubbed her arms until they became all red and sore, her palms sticky, and still he wouldn't stop watching.

"Love?" he reiterated as though it was his first time hearing the word. "Love. Why do you use that word?"

Kagome restrained her frown.

Sesshoumaru looked ahead to the sky, where a pair of seagulls soared from afar, braying shrilly. A breeze came and caressed through his long silvered hair, a cool, sea-salt breeze that was lost on her.

"The human concept of love continues to endure through the centuries. This _notion_ that your kind would flaunt so proudly. Since I came here, I've watched thousands of films and read countless of books. I listened to endless tracks of songs and I remember every line of every poem. But I have yet to figure out its actual definition. It must be a human thing to romanticise even a dreary concept of a soulmate."

"But," he said, looking back to her, "if you believe everything I've done thus far constitutes that notion, then yes. I love you, quietly in the darkest hour before the veil of night slips, imploringly in the manner of the night-bird as it pines for the moon, and selflessly, all your wishes embedded in my fingers, forged in iron-blood."

Kagome thought she had forgotten to breathe.

She laid back on her lounge chair and covered her arm over her eyes. It was alright—the sun couldn't blind her this way, and so could his terrible shirt. She felt the breeze when it came, salty in her nose and soothing on her arms, and the whale—the whale could come out right now for all she cared and capsize the boat, and they would drown and die, but it wouldn't matter anymore because he _loved_ her…

"So what are you now, Sesshoumaru?" she asked him. "A dream poet?"

Sesshoumaru slid back his sunglasses.

"I can be anything or anyone you want, Kagome. Just say the word."

* * *

Amari, dressed in a yellow sundress and matching sandals stepped out of the gantry at the crowded train station.

"Amari! _Amari!_ Over here!" she heard a familiar voice. She looked up and clutched her hat in excitement.

"Onii-chan!"

She ran to her brother who was waving and rewarded him with a violent, bone-splintering hug.

"Oww!" Ichiro yelled. "Are you trying to kill me?" Nevertheless, he broke into a smile and tousled her hair under her hat. "How have you been? Have you eaten?"

Amari shook her head. "Let's go to McDonalds!"

"Awesome, I'll treat you to a Happy Meal."

"But I don't want a Happy Meal," she pouted.

It was summer-time in Tokyo, the azure skies bearing thin wisps of cloud, the swirling heat unbearable. The train station was teeming with families spending the school holidays.

The siblings took a stroll on a boardwalk by the sea after their meal, Amari eating an ice lolly as she walked over the raised curb.

"I hate it. Why do you have to move so far away? I have to travel to the edge of town just to see you."

Ichiro slid his hands in his leather jacket as he walked, even though it was sweltering outside and he was sweating buckets.

"I'm sorry, Amari. What if you move out and live with me? That's a great idea, don't you think?"

Amari kicked a piece of twig near her feet. "I can't. My workplace is too far and besides, I don't think Mom and Dad will allow me."

Ichiro sneered. "You're already 26, Amari. You should do what you want."

"Well that's the problem. I don't know what I want." She tossed the lolly stick into a bin and hopped down to walk beside her brother. "I'm working in the shrine only because you said I would look cute in a _miko_ outfit."

He gave a little snicker and hooked his arm around her. "You do look cute, Amari. You're the cutest sister in the world."

They stopped by the railing to catch a view of the wide sea, glittering under the summer sun. Their eyes squinted at the row of tankers on the horizon. A pair of seagulls fluttered about the boardwalk amid the chatter of children. The breeze came, ruffling through their hair and clothes, a cool sea-salt breeze that made them want to relive the moment forever.

"We should go to the beach one day. Just like old times," Amari suggested. "Do you remember how our parents would bring us snorkeling?"

Ichiro smirked. "Yes, you were obsessed with seeing the corals. You practically begged Mom and Dad to bring you there all the time."

"Remember that stupid old nickname you gave me?" And they both answered in unison: "Coral Girl!"

Amari giggled like mad, hugging herself. "I hated every time you called me that. You were always bullying me."

She sighed. _Now what I would do just to hear you call me that again._

"Anyway guess what, Amari? I quit smoking."

"What! Oh goodie! You finally love yourself!"

He nodded. "Well yeah. How's Kagome-sama?" her brother suddenly brought up.

"Oh," she said. "Kagome-sama is a priestess now."

" _Wow_ ," he breathed. "She's doing really well now, isn't she?" _She's doing really well without me._

Amari turned back to the sea. "She asked how you were doing. She was shocked when I told her you moved."

Ichiro frowned, his lips a thin line. "Is she still with that man?"

"You mean Sesshoumaru-san?"

"Yes."

She breathed out a laugh. "They're practically inseparable. I don't think anyone can split them apart." Amari looked down at her sandals. "I'm happy for her, but I'm really filled with envy too. She has everything. Even the priest favours her more openly now. I'm not saying I'm jealous, but—"

"Amari. When you meet her at work, can you pass her this letter?"

Amari looked in surprise as her brother handed her an envelope from his jacket. There was an utmost serious look on his face that she had never seen before. "Make sure nobody sees you," he said.

"What's this about?" She took the letter in wonder. It was sealed with glue.

"It's my love letter to her, so don't read it!"

"Oh! Is it a symbol of your unrequited love? My hand is shaking just from holding it!"

"Promise me, Amari. Tell her to open and read my letter when she's alone," Ichiro reminded.

He was gripping her shoulders tightly, with no traces of humour in his voice. She felt pain underneath his fingers. Amari was _scared_. She looked deep into his bright eyes, the sound of seagulls braying somewhere. Her brother was different now. She couldn't put a finger to it. It was as if something had changed inside him.

"Make sure she reads it only when she's alone. And _burn_ it immediately after."

* * *

Sitting in his aged mahogany desk Jyohaku rubbed his face slowly. The heavy fatigue, just an overall sense of _lousiness_ was killing him.

He looked up and saw Amari, all diligent and enthusiastic in her working gloves, as she patched up (or tried to, at least) the fist-sized holes on the wooden walls of his office. He wanted to tell her to stop. Stop, because he didn't give a shit about those holes. Or the invoices on his desk or the fact that they had collected the least amount of donations this month in three years, or that the shrine committee was breathing down his neck, forcing him into an ultimatum—make that trip to his cousins' to plead if any of their children were interested to stand in as the next successor for the shrine— _or_ …"you could just get bloody _married_ and produce your own."

 _And why the hell is everyone trying so hard? Don't they know none of this shit matters? Of course they don't. They don't have a deadline on their goddamned lives._

Amari heard him sigh for the hundredth time.

"Jyohaku-sama, what happened to you? You look so frail and depressed."

He boomed. "Thanks for the heads up! I didn't know I _looked_ depressed!"

She quivered and turned away. "T-That's not what I mean."

He pulled away his reading his glasses and tossed them on his desk. _These bloody mood swings. Don't take it out on her. It's not her fault._

The question boomeranged back to his head _. Then whose fault is it?_

He closed his accounts book. "I just hate book-keeping. That's all," he replied in a softer tone, trying to sound nice. "All these dollars and cents. At the end of the day, they don't really mean anything."

"I-I wish I can say something to cheer you up."

"You don't have to say anything, Kirihata."

"Um," she tried again, peering at him cautiously. "This is just a suggestion, but why don't you leave our expenditure planning to Kagome? She works well with numbers and besides, she's trustworthy."

"Higurashi?" he went. "She can literally sit in my chair right now."

A clump of sawdust fell from the hole, dispersing on the floor. "Oh no, it's such a mess," she exclaimed.

"Listen Kirihata, I've already carved my opinion but I just need to hear it from someone else."

She gathered the sawdust with her hands carefully, sweeping them into a heap.

"If I need someone to nurture my next successor for the shrine, would Higurashi be a good candidate?"

Amari stopped half-way in disbelief. "I don't—I don't get you."

Jyohaku frowned. "You're really dense, aren't you? I'm asking if she can be a good mother who can raise a child for the shrine."

"What do you think?" she asked him back in a small voice.

"Quite frankly I think she hits the jackpot in more ways than one. She's more than capable of running the shrine on her own. I trained her, I know."

He paused to consider his words. "Beyond that, she has a gentle and kind heart—although she rarely shows it to me. And her fiery side. She can slap some discipline into our child whenever he or she needs it—and I will allow it!"

" _Our child_? But Kagome-sama already has a boyfriend!"

"Not _boyfriend_ ," he corrected her. "We met and he told me personally."

Amari gazed down to the dry heap of dust at her feet, and they looked just like her heart at that moment. "Is…Is that so?"

Jyohaku dragged his chair out and walked to the back of the room. He pushed down a finger through the blinds, looking through the window outside.

"Like I said, I already made my opinion. I just want to know what you think."

"It sounds like you're already made a decision." She laughed weakly. "You're so silly, Jyohaku-sama. If your heart is already set, then the opinion of others shouldn't matter, should it?"

"You don't understand, Kirihata. This has nothing to do with the heart."

He looked at Amari. Her eyes were glistening.

"Oh dear, I think I got dust in my eyes," she quickly said when she caught him staring, covering her face.

Amari ran out as fast as she could, blindingly. She collided straight into Kagome at the hallway beside the garden. Kagome was taken aback by her dishevelled appearance.

"Amari-chan! Are you alright?"

Amari looked away and wiped her tears. She dug through her pocket.

"I'm fine. I'm always fine, Kagome-sama." She handed Kagome the letter. "This," she said, "I met my brother yesterday and he wanted me to pass you this."

Kagome grabbed her shoulder. "How is he? How's Ichiro?"

"He's fine. He's always fine, just like me," Amari replied. "But you must open and read the letter only when you're alone, Kagome-sama. That was his only request. Read it when you're alone, and _burn_ it immediately after."

Kagome stood startled, speechless.

"Amari-chan, wait!" she called when her friend rushed off again, but she was only answered by the deafening pitch of the cicadas outside.

Kagome stared at the letter in her hand. Then she sought for a quiet bench in the garden.

Her fingers ran nervously over the thin edge of the envelope. It wasn't a simple letter, she knew. Ichiro had wanted her to burn it after reading, the severity of his message conveyed in Amari's distraught eyes. She could feel it, a dark premonition lurking within its contents. Her emotions were a stark contrast to the bright, summer-soaked surroundings of the garden.

The cicadas had gone mute as she opened and read the letter.

 _'Dear Kagome-sama,_

 _'First and foremost, before you read another line, please ensure you're alone. I need you to do this. It's important.'_

"Yes, I'm alone now," she said.

 _'Kagome-sama, this letter is a testament of my cowardice, and my inability to act.'_

Deep lines dug onto her forehead. "Ichiro, what are you..."

 _'I ran with my tail between my legs when I could have charged forward. But I didn't, because I just don't have that courage. Kagome-sama, you have to be braver than me. You need to get help. I'm going to go straight to the point. Please brace yourself over my next words._

 _THAT MAN LIVING WITH YOU IS DANGEROUS. HE IS EVIL. DO NOT LET HIM MANIPULATE YOU._

 _He is not who he is. Believe me._

 _I would be dead right now if I hadn't cried for mercy. I'm ashamed I did. But I wouldn't be here writing this letter to warn you. If he can hurt me badly that night, he can hurt anyone else in that manner and he can even hurt you._

 _I can't save you but you can save yourself, before it's too late. It's the only thing I will ever ask from you. I'm dead serious. Please, you can ignore everything else about me but not this letter. This is a matter of life and death. You need to get away from him._

 _Truth be told, I want to call you and hear your voice but I just can't take the risk. I'm in a dilemma just thinking. I'm in pain every day. Even writing this letter is difficult; I'm gripping my pen so hard._

 _I'm deeply sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't be the hero of your dreams. Your knight in shining armour upon a white horse coming for your rescue, like you imagined when you were young. I couldn't be any of those things for you._

 _Maybe in another life, I could be someone who's stronger and prove my worth. Maybe in another life, we'll get to know each other again and fall in love. And during that time, I hope you will see me the same way I always have. Dearly, in my heart._

 _It's the end of my letter. Please burn it once you're done. There should be no traces of this message left. Absolutely no traces._

 _Love,_

 _Ichiro Kirihata_

It was the whale. Kagome bent over in the bench, trying to grasp a single deep breath. That whale underneath the boat. It had finally made its appearance.

She strode down the hallway towards the office, letter crunched in her hand. She opened the door.

"Do you have a lighter—"

Her words cut short. Jyohaku was hunched on his knees, a hand cupping over his mouth, the contents of his stomach on the floor.

 _To be continued…_


	33. You're The (Devil in Disguise)

**A/N: Trivia #548 Sesshoumaru stopped calling Kagome "miko" after she got ordained.**

 **Yo guys. Firstly a big thank you to Lady Agnimitra for offering to beta my works despite her tight schedule! Also, for all your awesome reviews as always! It's good to know how invested you are as I am! You get hugs, you get kisses, everybody gets hug and kisses! *Oprah Winfrey style***

 **This chapter will be a smack to Kagome. Wake up, hun!**

 **(You're The) Devil in Disguise**

The wet cloth slapped on Jyohaku's forehead.

Kagome leaned down to frown at his face and carefully swept away the incorrigible tendrils crowding his forehead. An inexplicable feeling grated through his bones. Half-shrouded in a blanket upon his _futon_ , the remnants of his nausea still at the back of his throat, Jyohaku felt as if he was a helpless insect under her scrutiny.

"I think I'm beginning to understand," Kagome surmised to his pale face. "The appeal of vulnerability. There's something strangely attractive about you lying here sick and defenceless." The thermometer beeped at his ear. "Oh look, you're burning. Are you sure you don't want to go to the doctor?"

Jyohaku scowled inwardly. "Why did you have to start with something so perverse before asking me that?"

Kagome had brought him home, the skies opening up to rain the moment they walked through his door. He couldn't remember much, except that she had changed his soiled clothes and tucked him in bed. Three of his cats were already bumping their wet noses against his blanketed feet. Shippo sauntered in like a king, settling down between his legs.

"No, Shippo-chan, don't lie there. Your owner is sick." She fanned a straw fan to Jyohaku's face as the cat snuggled into her lap.

Jyohaku struggled to drag himself up.

"No, _you_ lie back. You almost fainted in the shrine."

Sighing frustratedly, his head sank back to his pillow. He could hear the soft rush of rain outside his windows, the whirring sound of his spoilt desk fan in his dim room, the warm weight of his cats by his feet.

The breeze from her straw fan lent a slight relief on his burning face. When Kagome leaned down earlier, he had caught a glance to her lowered top, her feminine scent at its highest peak.

It mingled with the rain, made him feel nostalgic somehow. And even though he felt half-dead it still managed to stir him up _there_.

Not bad, Jyohaku thought. Not a bad way to _die_.

"You know, you look a little yellow, Jyohaku-sama."

"It's the jaundice."

"Jaundice?"

"Take my meds from my second drawer," he ordered hoarsely, pointing.

Kagome did as told. When she saw the stash of medicine stored inside, she was taken aback. They were all under the same prescription from the hospital.

"What is this? Why do you have so much medicine with you?"

Jyohaku regarded her for a moment. "If you want to know, look in the first drawer."

She did. It was another envelope. This one was bigger, a manila envelope with the hospital's name and logo on it. Her hand froze.

"Open it," he said.

"No, not another letter."

"So you rather hear it from the horse's mouth. Good."

She looked at him with dread. Quickly she collected all of his medicine and brought it to him, then handed him the glass of water she had poured beforehand. Jyohaku rummaged through the medicine, helping himself.

When he was done, and it took him a long time, he rested his back against the wall, drawing heavy breaths. It was as though all his energy had been depleted to just swallow those pills. He gave her a long severe look as he composed himself, his dark eyebrows framing his equally dark eyes.

Kagome continued to wave the straw fan, faster this time.

"Higurashi, is there anyone in your family with a history of cancer?"

Kagome looked up sharply. "Cancer? No." She felt obliged to explain. "My dad had a car accident, and my grandfather passed due to old age."

He nodded. "Okay. Do you think you're ready to pull the reins of the shrine in my stead?"

"Pull? In your stead?"

"As the head, correct."

Her eyes darted around, searching for anything she could grasp as reality. It seemed like Jyohaku was the only real thing in that room.

"We never talked about this before. Are you planning to change the family succession system?" she edged the matter carefully.

"I can't. That's the thing."

Jyohaku gazed hard at her. "Listen. I'm offering my position to you but it comes at a sacrifice. I'll need an heir for my next successor—and that's the most important thing." He closed his eyes and dragged out a slow, ragged breath. "You don't have to answer me now. Take your time but not too long. I don't have the luxury to wait."

The fan slipped from her fingers. It was what it was, wasn't it? There was no room for her to be mistaken. Not even in her most senseless dreams did she anticipate this. Or maybe this was really one of them. One of her crazy dreams.

Jyohaku was proposing to her.

"What's...what's going on?" Kagome questioned. "There's more to this, isn't it? Replacing you as the head? You're too young to retire. Jyohaku-sama, explain yourself."

"Higurashi, you remember my old man, don't you? Quite simply, I caught what got him."

Jyohaku's father, the previous head of Yukino Shrine, had been the one who healed her and sealed the door to the Bone-Eater's Well for good twelve years ago. He had died of pancreatic cancer.

Kagome fell back on the tatami-matted floor. "No!" Shippo jolted from her lap and mewed shrilly.

"Calm down, you're scaring my cats," Jyohaku scolded.

She was reeling. It was impossible. Cancer was akin to a death sentence. How could he, this brash, wild-spirited of a man who took good care of himself succumb to a life-sucking disease like cancer? It was beyond her.

She pulled on his clothes vehemently.

"You're lying! You look _fine_ to me. You can't—you can't have cancer!"

"Don't kid yourself. I lost so much weight I can't even recognise myself." He placed a hand near his abdomen, at the spot that hurt the most. "Our symptoms are all the same. This pain that keeps coming. Constant periods of fever and nausea. And you noticed yourself my onset of jaundice. I went to the doctor, and collected my test results last week."

"How bad…how bad is it?" She didn't want to know. She didn't want to hear his answer.

"It's Stage 3 pancreatic cancer. I have a tumour in my pancreas and there's a high risk it might spread to my liver and lymph nodes. I have to undergo surgery and start my treatments very soon."

"How can you be so calm about this?"

An indiscernible look ran across his eyes. "Who says I'm _calm_? I'm terrified as hell, Higurashi."

She knelt there for a few minutes, thoroughly speechless. Just when she thought she had found respite—her nightmares had stopped, and she had a wonderful vacation—things were tumbling down around her again. Ichiro's shocking letter. Jyohaku's sickness. All these things…they were never-ending, weren't they?

Everyone around her had either disappeared, fallen sick or died. And she was in the centre of this ring of calamity.

"You're lying. You even said once that you would never have a wife like me. Don't tease me like this!"

Kagome shook her head indignantly. "Maybe it's not true. Maybe you're just overworked and you're having gastritis. That's right. You're always skipping your meals. You'll be fine once you have something to eat."

She stood up calmly, and Jyohaku knew then she had fallen into a state of self-denial.

"What do you want to eat? I'll cook you something."

"Rice crackers."

"I'll just help myself to your kitchen. All you need is a good, proper meal. Then everything will be fine as always."

Kagome strode towards the door and stopped beside the phonograph. "Oh look. You collected the phonograph from your mother's house."

A disc was already in place and she spun it into play. The beats thrummed on the tatami, a familiar, almost forgotten feeling. "There, nothing like good old music to fill the house."

Kagome skipped her way out to the kitchen. Jyohaku grimaced. Playing loudly was the one and only song he hated in the whole album. It reminded him of his ex-wife.

"Change the goddamned song at least!"

The pots and pans were already clanging in the kitchen. Jyohaku slammed his back against the wall. He had pushed himself too hard, both physically and mentally. It felt like an old wound had re-opened inside his guts. He could feel the tumour inside him, a putrid festering mass, awakened and agitated. He ground his jaw shut, trying to march through the pain and the damning song, as the room whirled around and around…

He was viewing the world from a carousel, his cats floating in the air.

 _"Heaven help me, I didn't see, the devil in your eyes!_ "

Kagome returned some time later, bringing a steaming bowl of chicken congee.

She called his name. Jyohaku's eyes rolled back into consciousness. The music was gone and his neck was damp with cold sweat. His cats were sleeping on his legs.

The rhythm of the falling rain remained unchanged. He mumbled through his words. "Just put it there. I'll eat it later. You need…you need to go back to the shrine."

"If I leave, you won't eat." Kagome stirred the porridge and dipped a spoonful, the hot steam cooling on her face. She hoped he didn't mind, and blew gently on the porridge near her lips.

Jyohaku turned away when the spoon reached him. "No."

"Just a little, you have to eat."

"I said I'll eat it later."

She was insistent. "Jyohaku-sama, please—"

The spoon flung off, clattering, spilled porridge on the floor. Kagome gasped quietly. Without a word she retrieved the spoon, rinsed it, wiped the floor and returned again to sit at the same spot.

"Please," and it sounded like she was pleading, the spoon raised again, "I've never taken care of anyone for such a long time. Let me take care of you now." When her voice didn't reach him, she called him again. "Narumi."

Something flickered past his eyes. Maybe it was her imagination. But his lips moved, _allowing_ her. Just a little, but more than enough. Her heart swelled.

Slow and painstaking, without an inkling of the passing time, they fell into their roles that late rainy afternoon—she the persistent caretaker, and he the grudging patient. He never looked at her once.

When his meal was done, he landed back to the _futon_ with a soft groan. Kagome shooed away his cats multiplying at his feet and smoothed his blanket.

She leaned down again. His gaze rocked back to her, lingered. Her alluring fragrance beckoned him once more like a playful whisper. It was all he could take.

Kagome brushed back his hair again. "You know you really need a haircut soon," she softly chided.

Jyohaku gripped her hand.

"You… You're really trusting, aren't you?" he said. "Not everyone is a _saint_ like you think."

He brought her quivering hand slowly down his face, her fingers brushing his nose, and then, across his lips.

Her confusion was arresting. "My hand."

"It's not just your hand," he said. "It's all over you."

Kagome blinked. There was a smouldering heat shifting in his eyes she had not seen even in his angriest days. Precisely because it _wasn't_ anger.

Was it true she trusted people too much?

Would she want to know what Jyohaku whom she knew for many years—as he laid in his sick bed, stripped of his usual form, _but still stronger than her nevertheless_ —was truly capable of?

She tried to smile, even as her sensitive wrist tingled from his hot breath. "You're a priest," she wanted to remind him.

A flash of conflict passed between Jyohaku's eyes, and she caught a fleeting glimpse into his deepest, fragile self. He subtly nodded.

"True, I am a priest. But I am a man foremost."

She felt naked under his intimate gaze. She pulled away and for a moment she _feared_ for his resistance, but he let her slip.

Kagome closed her eyes with a shudder of relief, her same hand gripping on her clothes. "Jyohaku-sama, I told you. Don't tease me like this."

She took the empty bowl hurriedly and stood up, her knees creaking. "I must go back to the shrine now."

Jyohaku faced the ceiling, a brooding frown on his face.

"You alternate between my names as you wish," he voiced as she was by the door. "Who is that you want—the priest, or the man before him?"

Kagome stood there for awhile, replaying his question over and over again in her head, like a small stone rolling down a hill.

"Lighter," she replied at last. "I want your lighter."

* * *

 _I love you, quietly in the darkest hour before the veil of night slips._

When she returned Sesshoumaru was at the kitchen by the counter, gutting a red snapper.

It was a sight fully ingrained in her. Him in his apron, long sleeves rolled up, silverlight hair bunched in an afterthought. She viewed his image through so many lenses over the years. There was surprise initially, that the demon she exorcised even knew how to cook, then it burgeoned to awe and delight, and after a while she admitted taking his skills for granted.

From an unassuming plate he transported her palate to the "four corners of the world", as he liked to phrase it.

Right now however, watching him use a sharp knife to slice the fish's belly open to spill its innards, its head chopped off and cleaned sitting in a bowl, she wondered something else. She wondered about his true nature.

Was she gullible to believe she could actually tame a beast—a great _youkai_ lord that once ruled over western Japan centuries ago?

Was _he_ gullible to think he could sit here so prettily and live his new days in blissful servitude?

Maybe they were both gullible. Maybe they both believed _this_ was their karma.

 _Imploringly, in the manner of the night-bird, as it pines for the moon._

"You're late again," Sesshoumaru said, without looking at her.

"I'm sorry. The priest fell sick and…I had to cook for him."

She didn't tell him what exactly had transpired. She had something else in her mind—Ichiro's words in his letter ringing hard in her head.

When did it start? It was after they returned from the villa, wasn't it? No, Kagome thought. It was _when_ they were at the villa. Right after he visited the bridge, and claimed her body.

Afterwards he wasn't the Sesshoumaru that she always knew. Afterwards he became the Sesshoumaru that he had always _meant_ to be.

It was as though something had spurred him at the bridge.

"Don't they say that a man's heart is through his stomach?" His voice broke through her thoughts. He glanced at her, his face impassive. "Have you had dinner yourself? I'm making fish-head curry."

She looked at the large fish head in the bowl, its dead eye peeking at her.

"It's a delicacy popular in Singapore and Malaysia. I agree it's quite an acquired taste. They even eat the eyes."

Sesshoumaru threw the curry paste into the pot, the oil sputtering. The sharp smell of spices rose quickly, prickling her olfactory senses. He added a bruised stalk of lemongrass, some curry leaves and milk among other ingredients, and then the snapper, head and all. As the curry began to simmer, the smell permeating through the curtains, their neighbours made known, so did her thoughts roiling to an unstoppable pitch.

She traced back their steps.

"Sesshoumaru," Kagome started. "I need to ask you something. What was the last thing you and Mr Morikawa talked about during dinner?"

Sesshoumaru adjusted the heat of the stove and wiped his hands with a cloth. "He was very adamant."

"Adamant?"

"We had a minor altercation. You were right, Kagome—he did have some shoddy contacts. I should have seen it coming, shouldn't I?"

She feigned confusion, feeling ill. "I don't understand."

"I confess I lost my composure," he said. "This Sesshoumaru can tolerate a lot of things, but not things that threaten and endanger you. They all pay dearly for it."

 _Selflessly, all your wishes embedded in my fingers, forged in iron-blood._

The world closed in on her. She was in a dark place once more. There was no oxygen in the air, no matter how hard she breathed. Her migraine softly throbbed to life, tightening on her skull.

"You didn't…" her words broke off. Her knees were giving way. "...do anything to him, did you? You didn't do anything to anyone…"

"I suppose I did fashion to make it look like he hanged himself. Tragic, but completely avoidable. Just the same way your friend at the shrine tripped over the stairs."

He continued, his voice completely indifferent to his speech. "It was a different case for the others. I did what I did simply because you _wished_ for it. You wish not to see Ichiro anymore so I made sure he would never show his face to you again. As for the priest…"

She looked up sharply. "What did—what did you to Jyohaku?"

"I gave him a drink to relieve him of his suffering. The poor priest, all he dreams about are the bright spotlights and the roaring crowd. Well, he can dream forever now." He sent her a disarming, victorious smile. "Tell me, has he proposed to you yet?"

When the colour drained off her face, he nodded curtly to himself. "Congratulations. You're now ripe for the picking. You're on the way to becoming the next head of Yukino Shrine."

Sesshoumaru shut the stove off. He removed his apron and hooked it up somewhere.

"Don't dwell too much on it," he continued, despite Kagome collapsing, her migraine pounding full-force, debilitating her. "If it makes you feel better you could see my actions as a form of loyalty, in exchange for the life you've gifted me."

She slipped onto the floor. She was crawling on the kitchen tiles.

" _Loyalty_?" she breathed, dragging herself out. She needed to go there before it was too late. The special corner in her bed, that deep burrow underground. "You're not some kind of _hound_ _dog_ , Sesshoumaru."

His walking feet blocked her path. Kagome struggled to look as Sesshoumaru knelt down to her.

"Then what would you call it?" His face was emotionless—he had placed on his stone-cast mask. She felt icicles in her veins. "What would you call everything I've done for you?"

She peered beyond his placid eyes, looking for something more within. Something to believe in.

"Love? Is that what you wanted to hear?" he said, touching her quivering face. "There are bonds stronger than love, Kagome. Love is but a fluttering feather, fleeting in the wind. But my loyalty lasts forever."

He pulled up her arms. "Come now, don't lie on the kitchen floor."

She restrained against him as he wrapped himself around her and pulled her body down like deadweight, slurred words tumbling carelessly from her lips.

"Why don't you just kill me too, Sesshoumaru? I should have died a long time ago."

"You got it all wrong."

Sesshoumaru cradled her limp body. If he were to touch her at a wrong place she would crack and crumble into little pieces. He couldn't bear that.

He kissed around her temples where it ached, then the corners of eyes where her tears fell profusely, until there were none left for herself or himself or anyone else for that matter.

"My life starts and ends with yours. That's what it means to be soul-bound; to be soulmates."

She didn't respond, letting herself go as if she was already dead.

"Just for awhile. I will lend you just for awhile." Sesshoumaru stroked and murmured into her hair. "Nothing more. And when everything is over, I will come to take you away. That is my promise to you."

* * *

" _So what are you now, Sesshoumaru? A dream poet?_

 _"I can be anything or anyone you want, Kagome. Just say the word."_

 _To be continued…_

 **A/N: I have successfully converted Sesshoumaru into a psychopath for this fic. *spins around in happiness* His character is heavily influenced by Mads Mikkelsen' portrayal of Hannibal in the Hannibal drama series. His flair in cooking, his calculative methodology, his superficial charm. Oh yes, the way he gets in Kagome's head! She can't get rid of him now. Don't worry, there's no cannibalism in this story. Watch Hannibal if you haven't!**

 **I̶ ̶L̶O̶V̶E̶ ̶M̶A̶D̶S̶ ̶M̶I̶K̶K̶E̶L̶S̶E̶N̶**


	34. The Great Pretender

**A/N: Trivia #874 All the chapter titles in Arc 4 are old songs from the phonograph. (I love songs from the 50s/60s, they heavily influence my fics)**

 _ **The Great Pretender**_

Using a wooden bucket Kagome splashed herself with the cold water from the waterfall behind her. Her clothes were soaked to her skin. She shut her eyes, her teeth chattering as she braved through another onslaught of her ritual bath.

She wiped the water from her eyes, and saw at the corner of her blurry vision, a tall dark figure coming from the woods. Kagome flung the bucket towards its direction as hard as she could.

Jyohaku caught the bucket in a surprisingly nimble reflex right before it hit his head.

"You just can't wait for me to die, can you?"

"I thought you were a demon," Kagome replied. He studied her face. He wanted to tell her she looked like a ghost herself—a ghost of her own self.

"It's a long trek from the shrine," she told him. "You shouldn't be out here."

"You're one to speak. Last time I checked, it's still working hours." He assessed their surroundings with a critical eye. "This is an isolated area. If you slip and fall, no one would know for days."

She smiled. "If I slip and die while performing a ritual bath, then the gods must really hate me."

The water had made her white robe translucent, her small and slender silhouette vividly defined under her clinging clothes. Jyohaku averted his gaze.

"Go and change," he said. "I'll wait here."

Jyohaku sat on a lichen-spotted rock by the river's edge. He saw nothing but wilderness around him, his eyes almost expecting an antlered deer to just trot out from the deep vastness. Maybe only three months ago he would have appreciated this view and marveled at the sheer magnanimity of nature as a humble bystander. But not anymore. Everything looked bleak around him, washed in black and white.

The way the river rushed rapidly over the rocks and under the fallen, rotting trunks, following through its course without a single worry in the world. Jyohaku _envied_ the river.

Kagome appeared, fitted in a dry set of clothes, her hair wrung out and slung down her back. She walked carefully towards him on the smooth water-eroded rocks, barefoot. A small basket hung from her hand. Inside were a few sandwiches and a bottle of water.

She was starving, but she handed him a sandwich anyway. He declined. She sat beside him on her own lichen-spotted rock.

They both watched the river pass before them in silence.

She started first. "How are you feeling now, Jyohaku-sama?"

"A hundred times better. Some people are just gifted with the healing touch."

Kagome frowned. "But you're not completely healed."

"What do you mean?"

She hesitated. "Your… _cancer_."

There was a pause of surprise. "I have cancer? That can't be—you said it was _gastritis_."

Jyohaku's laughter waned. It was slightly rough at the edges, but not entirely unpleasant. She could probably hear it all day, just not that day. "I wish I can pick my little truths like you, Higurashi. What I choose to believe in, as and when as I like."

She stared at her own hands, wrinkled from her bath. "When are you going for your treatments?" she then asked softly.

He took a long while to answer, and at first she thought her question had been drowned by the gushing falls nearby, but his voice warbled through again.

"I don't see the point, honestly. It's the bloody treatments that killed my father. Radiation and chemotherapy and whatnot. His body couldn't take the side effects. The old man just withered slowly."

"But you're younger than him—maybe you'll be able to hold through!"

"You're really optimistic, aren't you? _No_. If my body wants to die, let it be. I will let it go."

Jyohaku stood up and expelled a harsh sigh. "I already died when my life was altered to become a priest. Do you understand that there is no difference? My death just stretches beyond, slowly."

A painful sigh formed deep in Kagome's chest as she watched him. "Jyohaku-sama..."

Then the wind came. Stealthy and surreptitious. She closed her eyes as it spelled audible words in her ears. _Could you?_ it whispered.

 _Could you look at him in the eye knowing_ you're _partly responsible for his predicament?_

"Actually," Jyohaku began in a rigid manner, "Actually I came here because I wanted to apologise."

 _Please don't,_ Kagome begged in her heart _._

"I tried to back you into a corner over my own personal problems, and I…behaved inappropriately as well. In fact," and he was swallowing over his words," just forget about the whole conversation we had. I'll figure out something. Maybe…maybe another visit to my cousins' is in order." He gave a wry smile. "Who knows if they're suddenly enlightened. When that happens, I will need your help."

"I'm over what happened," she deadpanned coldly. "You're right however. I do trust too easily."

A certain gloominess sullied over his face like a dark cloud.

"I just go on, making you hate me more than you already have, don't I?" he said.

Her fists gripping on her lap, Kagome stared into the towering cluster of elm trees in the woods before her, searching for something in there, a little clue or a sign. She found her lips forming words on their own.

"Jyohaku-sama. Are there _sins_ that can't be forgiven?"

Jyohaku contemplated. "I don't believe in that. What I believe is if you're sincere, the gods will be all-merciful."

"I want to be forgiven. I'll cleanse myself everyday, for as long as I have to until the rest of my life."

His frown deepened. "But _why_? What sins plague you, exactly?"

In reply she merely smiled to herself. It was her most bitter one yet. Jyohaku could see her heart wrenching in her eyes.

"On second thought, hold your words," he said. "Just as you're discouraged from revealing the shortcomings of others, you're not obliged to confess your own. The benevolent gods however will listen to you if you're repentant."

He pulled out his prayer beads from his pocket, the one made of linden wood, to ward against evil spirits. "But who am I to say? Even someone like me will question them from time to time. And I'm in a situation where I'm being severely tested."

He knelt down to pass the beads into her small palm. "Take this with you. Maybe you don't have evil spirits to dispel, but it will protect you from your bad thoughts."

Kagome gripped the beads. She strained against herself as the wind came again, spitting viciously its venom.

 _Shameless, wallowing in your self-pity and your private sins... How do you live your days, while this man is counting his?_

 _I want to die too,_ she breathed.

 _No,_ the wind said.

 _You can't die. You have to take responsibility. You have to amend your mistakes and accept your punishment._

 _You need to_ atone _for your sins._

Jyohaku's hand trembled badly, despite him keeping a straight face to her. Kagome found herself remembering that night. Remembered how he was there for her once when she needed someone to lean on. It was a short instance, clumsy and made cloudy with drink, but she had carefully protected it in her memory, wrapping it in waxy leaves.

No, not once. Jyohaku's door was always closed but it was never locked. In her carefree days she would help herself in with her lopsided grin, and he would send his most disdainful frown. But he would never push her out when she asked for his advice. He was always there, grudgingly so, but there.

Kagome reached out. A spell broke in him somewhere the moment she touched him. He collapsed into her. She soothed his shuddering back wordlessly. She couldn't cry with him even if she wanted to; her tears had run dry like an old well.

Her eyes roved around her. The blue cloudless sky. The dark woods. The loud crashing of the gushing falls, like a never-ending rainstorm. The quiet bubbling river that followed after. She would imprint this moment in her memory, wrap everything in her waxen leaves.

And then she looked up and finally saw it. High on the long wooden trunks of the elm trees—her new resolve carved for her in the bark by bloodied talons. Kagome read the words slowly.

"I will be the next head of Yukino-jingu."

Jyohaku lifted his head in shock. He stared at her, his voice turned husky. " _What_?"

Her eyes were startlingly cold, its colours running deeper than her usual, clutching him through her sheer gaze alone. Even the tone of her voice had changed. "I'll do everything I have to. Get married. Carry your heir. And raise the child to be the next successor of the shrine—I will bear the responsibility."

To embrace everything that came along so the gods could grant her absolution. Kagome would have to embrace _every single thing_.

"Are you sure?" Jyohaku spoke carefully. "You can't pull back once you dip your feet."

"I'm waist-deep now. Don't stop me."

Kagome stilled when Jyohaku held her and pressed his lips on her forehead.

"Then, _thank you_ , Higurashi. With those words alone, you just eased a great burden in my chest. I can't say it enough. But I can rest in peace now."

"Jyohaku-sama, in return, will you do something for me?" He searched her eyes for her next words. "Don't give up on yourself. You _must_ keep striving. I'm going to be…" her words trailed, "I'm going to be by your side no matter what happens.

Jyohaku laid his head back on her shoulder.

"Do wish-granting angels exist?" he then wondered, his voice turned husky again.

"I could be your first one."

He laughed. "Then I wish…you would stop calling me as your priest."

"How could I, when you still look at me as your apprentice?"

"Stupid, the moment I asked you to marry me meant you were already my equal in my eyes."

"Okay," Kagome said. She thought about it. Not long and hard, because the compulsion came to her so naturally. And with a lingering sadness she wondered too if this was how Sesshoumaru always felt.

"Well, is there anything on your bucket list, Narumi?"

"Bucket list? Are we really going to talk about that right now?"

" _Tell me_ ," she urged, her hand sweeping across his back.

"Paris," Jyohaku blurted before he could stop himself. "I've always wanted to go see Paris."

"Paris? Isn't that a bit…overrated?"

He peered up angrily. "Oh, so you want to diss even at a dying man's wish?"

Kagome pushed back his head. "Alright, Paris it is." Her eyes watched the elm trees carefully. "We'll get married as soon as possible and have our honeymoon there. When we come back, we'll proceed with your surgery and treatments. Okay, Narumi?"

She sounded as if she was reading from a script. "Okay," Jyohaku murmured back, his head still heavy with disbelief.

His nose reached into the crook of her neck. Once more she graced him with her beautiful scent, breath-taking in every sense of the word, gripping him around his neck like a noose. A man could bathe and drown in it. A man could _die_ in it.

His eyes followed the coursing river quietly. It sparkled under the sunlight, as though there were a layer of diamonds underneath its surface.

Suddenly, the river didn't look that bad after all.

* * *

With her extra key that she had kept secret from the priest, Kagome entered her old house. It was barren and empty, looking the exact way it was when they had left it. Kagome didn't bother to switch on the lights; she didn't want to awake the little _zashiki warishi_ sleeping inside. Also, it was still summer, so the ghastly bathroom-licker that once spooked her was probably in there too.

She headed straight to the backyard. She searched for the small shovel, the one she used for times like this, except that it had been a long time since then. So long in fact that cobwebs strung along when she took the shovel, and set to dig through the soil at the corner.

The ground had grown compact and stiff from neglect. An owl hooted somewhere outside the house, and the crickets rang back. Kagome tried harder, until the shovel hit bone, before her fingers began to unearth quickly.

 _Bone powder, dirt, sandalwood and lime, a dash of frankincense, among other things._

She exhaled a soft laugh as she picked the little bones that had crumbled off from the main skeleton.

"A dog," she said. "In what laws of the world do you sacrifice a dog's body in exchange for one with a human likeness?" She answered her own question. "When you make a pact with Inugami apparently. The dark god of course takes more than he gives. And I wondered. Wondered why you never completely shed your canine tendencies."

Sesshoumaru was standing behind the _shoji_ door facing the backyard. Only half of his face showed, and that half shone so bright and luminous from the moonshine that it brought to detail that he was, in fact, not human.

Kagome sighed as she stood up, her palms cradling the bones gently. "You were such a good dog in the beginning, too."

"Are you going to feed me through the bowl again?" Sesshoumaru asked, his tone slightly wary, but mostly weary.

Kagome nodded. "Yes. That was one of my first mistakes. Unravelling your leash. Letting you ingest my blood directly."

"As a result I became bolder."

"And a little insolent too, don't forget."

"You could have fought with resistance," he argued, in the softest defiant way possible. "I would have let you win."

"But where's the fun in that? I suppose, deep inside my mischievous heart I wanted to know how far you would go."

"And we went very far indeed."

"Yes," Kagome said, looking at him in his eyes now, "Very far."

" _Do you regret?_ " he asked her after a long silence.

" _No."_ And her unfaltering conviction surprised even her, "And I hope my answer remains the same in ten or twenty years to come. I will never regret bringing you here."

"Even if I never gave you the answers you wanted?"

Kagome shook her head. "You gave me the answers I _needed_. And with those, I moved on."

She walked back into the house, her feet leaving dust-prints on the floor. She passed by him, their sleeves brushing, their auras seeking the other but grasping nothing.

She stopped. "Yes. I wanted to tell you that I accepted the priest's proposal. You must be happy now."

"I'm not happy, Kagome."

"Tell me, do you really know what love is?" she asked with all the bitterness in her smile. "Because if you did, you wouldn't have allowed me to be with another man."

"I suppose I could ask you the same. Do you know what love is?"

"Of course I know what it is!"

His face hardened upon her reply, set in ivory, jagged at the edges. "Then you would have forsake everything. Your ambitions, the people around you. You would have declared naught on the world and you would have _stayed_."

"Because," and she was struggling against her words, not letting them tumble from her chest and betray her, "because you said, there are bonds stronger than love. And you're right. You're right about that, Sesshoumaru." She shut her eyes painfully. "You granted my wishes, and now I have to perform my part too."

"I put you before myself," she heard him above the barest whisper, just as she was stepping into the kitchen.

There was something in the way he spoke that she knew if she turned back it would be too late. There was something in the way his aura beckoned softly and clingingly that she knew that he too, was _disintegrating_ inside and she badly wanted to join him and bathe in their ruins—but she couldn't, so she steeled herself, planted her feet into the ground like roots.

"I put you before myself," Sesshoumaru had said. "Is that not love?"

The noren curtain waved.

 _To be continued..._


	35. Strangers in the Night

**Strangers in the Night**

"Luan and I here are just curious," the man said, grinning white teeth to his partner beside him, in the makeshift tent lit by overhanging fluorescent bulbs, a table cluttered with rugged laptops, walkie-talkies and other dubious-looking wired devices. Outside the tent, vigorous shouts were strewn in the local Afrikaans language.

Sesshoumaru remained stoic in his seat, and merely supplied them with a subtle shrug. "And I'm curious as to why you're curious."

"You must agree that our interest is not unfounded," Luan said, leaning forward. Luan was taller, and looked like he could rip a lion in half with his bare hands and mount its head as his own, and therefore his name was just as apt. "You have our deepest trust as our financial benefactor and we thank you for that, but what exactly would spur a Japanese man from the other side of the globe to come here and support our cause?"

A smile spread across Sesshoumaru's face, and a small jolt rippled under Luan's skin, although he did well to hide it. Luan had seen so much that he had reached that point in life where almost nothing could faze him. But then he saw that little flame, flickering in both of Sesshoumaru's eyes, a dancing, living fire, and he wondered if he had really seen everything.

Sesshoumaru licked his lips, choosing his words carefully.

"You're mistaken. I do not support your cause," he replied. "Rather, I just want to watch the whole world engulfed in flames."

* * *

It was a small traditional ceremony at the shrine where the guest list was exclusive to only the immediate family members and the shrine committee.

Kouhei wasn't shocked. To be honest, he kind of saw it coming in one way or another. But to be told of the wedding only two weeks prior—the four of them gathered in the head office, Amari and him speechless as they looked at each other—felt almost like a slap on the face. He couldn't understand neither the rush, nor why the planning had been kept under wraps.

Maybe it's a shotgun wedding, Kouhei figured unconvincingly to himself. Looking at the bride however sitting all graceful and poised on the platform, he immediately withdrew his embarrassing thoughts.

Kagome was anything but ethereal in her white wedding robes, red-rimmed, her face partially covered by her _wataboshi_ head-dress. Sitting beside her was Jyohaku in a formal black kimono, looking more rigid than ever, his cheekbones as harsh as the expression in his eyes.

Kouhei carelessly noted how the head priest had grown much thinner lately. If anything he appeared like a lesser version of himself. Then he looked around the sea of heads bobbing in conversation. That's right. Amari was supposed to be sitting beside him.

He searched the shrine grounds only to find her sitting by the stairs under the _torii_ gate, hugging her knees.

Amari buried her face when she saw him. Kouhei hopped onto the spot beside her.

"I was starting to get bored with all the guests inside," he remarked, stretching himself. "Especially the guys from the shrine committee. All they do is drink and laugh at inanities. No wonder the priest can't stand them."

Amari said nothing. He sat down and waved at her. "Hey."

"I can't stand watching them too," she spoke at last. "The bride and the groom."

"Amari…"

She tried to etch a smile. "I lost, Kouhei. It's game over for me. I've tried my best, even learning from _her_ mistakes, and yet I still stayed invisible to him."

"You're not invisible, Amari. Not to me, at least," Kouhei said. Amari threw herself in his arms where she wept. He held on to her tightly.

"I think I'm going to call my brother and move in with him," she said.

He gasped in despair. "You can't leave town! What about _me_? You can't just pack up your bags and leave me alone here."

"I'm sorry, Kouhei. But I need some time to think about what I really want in my life." She beamed at him despite everything, her smile like a ray of sunlight piercing through rain, and into his chest. "We'll call each other every day. I promise."

Jyohaku leaned in beside Kagome.

"Kagome, meet my younger sister, Kayo. She's my only surviving family, and she lives in Tohoku, in my hometown."

Kagome lifted her head. A woman was bending before her with a wide, pleasant smile. She had a grey film over her eyes. Jyohaku's sister was blind.

Kagome smiled at Kayo warmly and touched her arm. Kayo gave her a tight embrace.

"Welcome to our family, Kagome," she said. She kissed Kagome's cheek and expressed mild surprise. "My, you smell just like _pears_. Maybe that's why my brother likes you so much."

Kagome sat stock-still after Kayo had left.

"Narumi," she called, her voice tight under her breath. "Your sister says I smell like pears."

" _I knew it_ ," Jyohaku exclaimed quietly. "I've been trying to figure it out for some time. Trust my sister to have a keen sense of smell."

A part of Kagome shattered into smithereens, like broken glass.

* * *

 _"I have to refuse this offering," Sesshoumaru said, pushing the bowl back to her. "I cannot drink this, not yet."_

 _The contents of the bowl shook in Kagome's hands. It contained the drops of her blood for his sustenance; and most importantly the ingredients for his binding._

 _"Why?" she asked and her voice had become shriller than she intended, "What's stopping you?"_

 _"There is one last thing I need to do," he replied. "And this Sesshoumaru doesn't like to leave things half-done."_

* * *

The tap ran continuously into the bathtub. She had scrubbed herself sore to get rid of her scent, her skin tingling where the warm water touched her. Kagome wondered what was the longest possible time one could stay in the bath, without inviting suspicion. She was submerged in both the soapy water and in her thoughts, never really feeling clean enough, when she felt the base of the tub thrum to a low beat.

Her eyes darted around the unfamiliar bathroom. It was an untidy one, where half-empty bottles of shampoo lay strewn on the shelves because someone couldn't decide on a good one. She was in Jyohaku's house. And yet a sense of déjà vu filled her, from the way the beats vibrated into her body through music.

Carefully she grabbed the edge of the tub with a wet hand and pulled herself up.

He was leaning against the wall by the phonograph, and he too was still in his bathrobe, his damp hair brushed back, a glass of liqueur in his hand.

"Strangers in the Night," Kagome remarked. "A fitting song, or one to mock our situation?" She watched the large disc spin under the needle as Frank Sinatra crooned, a sight that never failed to mesmerise her.

"You decide. Thought I set up the mood for our…" he drank slowly from his glass, his haunted eyes locking with hers, "... _successor-making sessions_."

"And you had to give that mediocrity a name?"

"I had a lot of free time to think about it, so, yes."

Kagome raised an eyebrow at his glass. Apparently the doctor's advice to not take a single drop of alcohol into his system had fell on deaf ears.

She stole his drink, took a swig then regretted instantly.

"Ugh!" she retched in disgust. "What is this?"

"Bénédictine with milk," Jyohaku answered with a smile. "A nightcap—makes for good sleep."

"Good gods, Narumi. I wasn't aware you had turned into an alcoholic."

A grave shadow fell across his face. "You would too. If you saw your remaining lifespan written on paper."

"We have a flight in the morning tomorrow. The last thing you want is to wake up with a hangover."

He shrugged dismissively and Kagome sighed. She was convinced he was intent on killing himself slowly.

"Why Paris?" she then asked.

"Because it's in my bucket list. Because it's a good place to die."

"You're always talking about dying, Narumi."

"But I _am_ dying." And then he added, "It's not like I have anything to live for anyway."

Kagome placed the glass with its vile concoction aside.

"Listen. I'm your wife now. Which means I have the right to restrict your lifestyle for your own good. No more drinking from now on, do you understand?"

Jyohaku regarded her coolly at first, which was why she was stunned when he pushed her against the wall.

"Nobody restricts me. I will drink myself _blind_ if I need to. That is an order, or are you going to challenge me as usual?"

His twisted features were the darkest she had ever seen, to the point she almost couldn't recognise his scowl.

Kagome raised her head high, although it only served to expose the rapid pulse on her throat.

"I have a confession. I get my kicks from disobeying you." She ground her jaw in her impudent manner. "Your punishment…is what I crave the most."

"So you like to get punished?" he growled, soft but menacing. Kagome bit through her gasp as he turned her body roughly against the wall, and locked her wrists behind her in a single grip. "You want to get punished, Higurashi?"

"Yes…" her reply dragged from her throat before she could stop herself, almost _begging_ him. "Please punish me, Jyohaku-sama. For all my mistakes, for all my transgressions..."

She fell backwards on the _futon_ spread out in the middle of the room.

The song changed in the air. With a damning realization _Chances Are_ began to play, the initial piano strains alluding to her memory when she danced with Sesshoumaru under the moonlight. The heavens must be mocking her up above.

 _No, not this song. Not when I'm going to…_

He crawled before her. Kagome rose to watch, transfixed with terror, and yet a part of her was rife with anticipation.

"I was wondering how I could do this…" Jyohaku met her face, "...and still stay _sane_ with you. And then I realized, why not just _fall_ into that dark, spiralling abyss and…"

"... _drag me along_ ," Kagome rasped, as his hands grasped her jaw, pressing across her cheeks, "You want to drag me along into your special hell."

"We'd make such a great pair, don't you think?" He was restraining the maddening urge to graze his lips against hers.

He let her head fall on the pillow, and she seethed back at him.

His heated gaze upon her indignance, he deftly unravelled her robe open, his hand smoothing down the slender shape of her hip. Her warm flesh burned his hand, and he almost pulled away at the sensation after his long period of abstinence; almost wept at the sheer depravity of it all.

His hand wandered further between her thighs, and her slickness surprised him. He studied his glistening fingers and carefully brought them to taste.

He hissed under his breath.

"Taste yourself," he urged, the trembling tips of his fingers brushing across her parted lips, "Never have I been with a woman…with such an exquisite flavour as yours."

Kagome closed her eyes, her breath snagging as the distinctive taste swept across her tongue.

"Do you like it?" she heard herself ask.

He nodded, his eyebrows strung in a pained expression.

"It's almost as if I was made for you, isn't it?"

Her words struck him deep somewhere. He could feel it deep in his guts, where it throbbed in his spoiled flesh, rushing through his infected blood. Jyohaku gasped and bowed over her, completely undone and helpless. He held an arm under her back and buried his face into her hair.

 _Kill me right now_ , his soul beseeched to his gods in pure agony. _Just kill me right now, like this._

When the pain ebbed away, though not completely gone, his mouth seeked for her ear, his voice strained in a husky murmur. "I don't believe in things like destiny or soulmates. But for just one moment," and Kagome inhaled a sharp breath, her fingernails cutting into his back as her dead eyes trained to the ceiling above, "For just one moment, I would like to believe that you _were_ made for me."

When it was over, and it was as joyless and excruciating as it could be for the both of them, Jyohaku rolled and perished beside her, or at least, _wished_ he perished. It was an arduous journey, fumbling in the dark, of which there had only been one ultimate conclusion to reach—his—and throughout it he wondered how his body could be merged with someone else's and yet still feel utterly bereft and lonely.

Kagome remained beside him, dazed and motionless. She was there and yet he saw her faraway, closed off in another dimension.

"Are you," her voice came in a wavering whisper, after what felt like forever, "Are you alright? Please don't exert yourself."

"I'll never be alright. But you… You must have pictured a beautiful wedding, and a blissful marriage for yourself."

"It's alright," Kagome gave a rueful smile. "You can't get everything you wish for."

There was something in her broken sigh. Jyohaku turned her face towards him. It took her awhile before she was ready to meet his eyes, and even then only a shy glance.

"Let's do it properly when we fly for Paris tomorrow. Our successor-making sessions." Kagome gave a little laugh when he used that term again, and it alleviated him than all his medicine ever did. He stroked her face, feeling her quiver. "And none of that shitty roleplay again, please."

"It's not roleplay," she sighed into his hand.

"Maybe a change of our surroundings will lighten our moods. We'll do it gently and tenderly, like how the French lovers do." He kissed her soft cheek, and when she didn't budge, the corner of her lips.

Kagome mulled over his words as he made his way down her neck. There were so many things wrong with them. She wanted to tell him firstly that the point of everything was to get an heir, and therefore the delicate intricacies of coupling were unnecessary, or that Paris was not as picturesque as it seemed in the romantic movies and the blue sunny postcards, or that his touch sent spider-like shivers under her skin.

But it wasn't about what she thought anymore.

So what she told him instead was, "Of course, Narumi. I'm happy as long as _you_ are happy."

In reply he whispered something against her skin and he was gentle and tender, and she pleaded for him not to be so _kind_ , because she couldn't take it, and mostly because she didn't deserve it.

* * *

 _'You bastard. You groomed my body with your fucking pears.'_

Sesshoumaru read her message, his flat eyes running over her words repeatedly. He wanted to laugh at first, then realized there was no humour in it. He tossed his phone on the bed and laid his body to rest.

His palm roamed slowly across his body. It stopped over his chest, right over his beating heart where it stayed.

"It hurts…" he spoke with uncertainty to himself. "It hurts… _right_ _here_."

He stared at the white-washed ceiling, his hand on his chest, and it could have been for hours or days even, until there was a knock on the door. Sesshoumaru sat up abruptly.

He recognised one of the men outside, but not the young male being thrusted to his door. "A gift from Luan," the familiar one said, and then he left just like that.

Sesshoumaru frowned at the boy who had casually let himself in and made himself comfortable on the bed. He closed the door behind him.

The boy peered at him curiously, and from the way the strange-looking man was staring at him, ascertained that Luan had guessed wrongly.

The boy spoke. "Luan said that the Japanese never rejects the gifts they receive. Is that true?"

Sesshoumaru sighed, having understood the situation and crossed to the other side of the room, where he poured a glass of wine on the trolley.

"Name?" he asked.

"Don't have one. They call me by so many names that I've forgotten who I actually am." Then he sent a mischievous, boyish smile. "So what is it, mister? I can be anything, or anyone you want."

They were familiar words, words that left Sesshoumaru's own lips once.

He drew the long curtains slightly. He watched the world playing outside from his tinted windows like a scene from a movie—a country fraught with unrest, and teetering dangerously on the brink of a civil war.

One by one.

Sipping his wine, Sesshoumaru smiled.

 _To be continued…_

A/N: Someone stop Sesshoumaru! Also it was hard to write Kagome and Jyohaku's scene, because setting the dynamics of their marriage is vital. I have so many versions of it. *stares at the frisky lemon version made for my own entertainment* Anyway, the pear mystery is finally solved!


	36. La Vie En Rose: Part I

**A/N: The next chapters contain traces of NarKag. This one has a dash of self-love and a teaspoon of sacrilegious sex. If any of these bother you, I'm sorry you just have to stomach through it. *laughs evilly***

 **La Vie En Rose: Part I**

It rained during their first two days in Paris.

The flight had been unkind to Jyohaku. It was long and it was freezing, and aside from having to sit for fourteen hours, his fatigue casting a surly glimmer over his eyes, he had to deal with his bad nausea and bowel issues.

Kagome was playing her role as his caregiver too well. Oh he knew she enjoyed it. She loved to fuss over him like a child ("Please eat something, even a little bit," she would urge or "Are you sure you don't need help in the toilet?"). It grated on his nerves and made him feel like a hopeless shit of a man, as if he wasn't one already.

Stuck in a claustrophobic space, seven miles up in the air their tempers finally flared at one point, bursting like a balloon blown beyond its limit. She was rude and scathing, and he in turn nearly hit her.

They promised themselves to be better, a quiet vow born from remorse and guilt, and even then there was doubt, because they barely _landed_ and started the journey.

Or perhaps the journey had started long before they knew it. Perhaps it had started way back, at the moment he slipped the ring onto her finger. The first test came during their wedding night, when they had to consummate their marriage in what he thought was the—

"…worst sex in my life," Jyohaku groused. He was crouched in the bathtub in their room in Hôtel La Bourdonnais Paris, naked, and Kagome was holding a scissors at his face. A while ago he finally caved in and gave her the rights to his untameable mop of hair.

They had reached Paris late last night and spent half the day sleeping from the jet lag. When they woke up it was five in the afternoon and the whole city was raining cats and dogs. Their dinner was taken at the hotel restaurant.

Kagome snipped off a few strands of his fringe. "You thought that was bad? I had worse in high school."

Jyohaku shot a genuine look of horror. "You were doing it in high school? What a tramp."

The scissors danced dangerously near his eyes. "Alright I retract my words," he quickly said. "I started out in middle school."

"Who's the tramp now?"

Jyohaku closed his eyes and sighed. A pleasant memory must have flitted on his mind because he then smiled.

"We were young and restless once upon a time."

"Most definitely."

"Makes me wish I'd met you in high school instead."

Kagome paused to look at him in the eye. "You would be in your mid-twenties then." She dragged the word, testing the waters. _"Creep._ "

"Age is just a—"

The sharp point of the scissors scraped his forehead and he cursed aloud. He snatched it away from her diabolical hands. "Are you done now?"

"Yes, quite." She mussed up his hair. "See, you look so much better now. So handsome." She rubbed the jaw on his scar, an ambiguous smile on her face.

"What did I say about patronising me?"

Jyohaku opted to soap himself, clinging to what modicum of dignity he had left. Kagome sat at the edge of the bathtub, the running shower in her hand.

"I hope it doesn't rain tomorrow," he said. She replied nothing, strangely quiet. He looked up only to find her staring between his legs. " _Tsk_."

She merely glanced away indifferently. "We have one week in Paris. We'll take our time slowly. You want to visit the Louvre Museum tomorrow right?"

"And the Eiffel Tower, don't forget. And the Arc of Triomphe. And the Notre-Dame."

"Wasn't that burned down recently?"

"What's left of it, at least."

She cleared the pile of hair sitting at the drainhole. "Do you want to soak for a while in the tub? It will help to calm down your frayed nerves."

"I wonder why it's frayed in the first place. Oh it's you, making me feel more suffocated than I already am!" His raised voice bounced off the four walls.

"Narumi."

"Yes, please," he said, "and let the bathroom be lighted with nothing but warm candles and you'll take a chair and sit by the tub, _dear wife_ and you'll lovingly read me a book."

"Is that how you always do it?" Kagome asked, seemingly amused as she filled the bathtub. But behind her calm countenance he could see she was straining, trying hard for his sake. "Except it's your cats reading to you."

"Oh you'll never know. And I hope Kouhei and Kirihata are taking good care of them. Say, isn't she allergic to cats?"

"You know, you worry too much. You're on vacation, remember? You're supposed to relax!"

He ground his jaw, agitated. "Well I can't _relax_ when you're here."

Kagome left and closed the door. Finally alone, Jyohaku released an echoing sigh and straightened his knees in the water, where he thought about a lot of things.

Striking one item off his bucket list was one of them. He had done it despite not obtaining his doctor's approval. He was finally in Paris, the city of lights, or if he was feeling a bit sentimental, the city of romance. But looking at Kagome he was sure nothing of that sort was going to happen.

She'd smothered him with her matronly ways ever since she learnt of his condition. But aside of his waning health she had showed remotely no interest in him whatsoever. It somewhat irked him, her complete indifference. Then there was that casual leer to his privates she had sent just now that surprised him more than he wanted to admit.

His fingers twitched in the water as he remembered that night. She had been accommodating but detached despite their bodies being one. He wanted to replicate their time together, but under different circumstances. One where she was not as reluctant with him, but warm and willing and _wanting_.

He whispered her name. A stirring rose in his loins and he grasped himself, trying to pull in the memory of her special scent. It was still there, lingering in the bathroom. His mind concocted a quick scenario—he was healthy and robust once more and before he knew it they were in the shrine, performing the deed. She was bent over before the statue of Inari-okami, telling him to go _deeper_ , as if she knew he was holding back, and so he would, he would give her his everything and he would finish in her in a satisfying, pain-free climax, his seed sowed in her and still she would cry for more…

"Guess what I found!" Kagome said, banging into the bathroom and he instaneously crossed his legs in reflex, "Your candles!"

Jyohaku could only grunt to acknowledge, having nearly died from shock. She went along with her business, smiling widely as she placed the candles and lit them. "You must be thinking how I got them, right? I am after all your wish-granting angel…"

She went out again and he could hear her dragging the chair in. Jyohaku coughed in relief, cursing at the same time, his desire now but limp.

Afterwards she sat down by the foot of the tub, and she read, of all the books in the world, Nabokov's _Lolita_. She was delighted and found beauty in its perversity, embellished in its whimsical prose, just as he had indulged in his own moments ago, a secret fantasy no one else would know.

"I'm scared if you sleep in the bath, Narumi," she said, looking up once at him.

"That's a perfect opportunity, isn't it?" he replied morosely. "Then you can push my head underneath the water and watch me rest in peace forever."

"My, my," she said, closing the book. "Don't be putting ideas in my head."

Despite the both of them wanting to, for different reasons, none of them quite dared to initiate another successor-making session, and so they quietly returned to bed to await the next day.

The rain followed through the night and into the next morning.

* * *

Sesshoumaru was in his armchair, his legs swung over the coffee table, the trolley of wine beside him. He was watching Tamasaburo's signature _kabuki_ performance of the Heron Maiden. His favourite DVD had followed him from home and he made it a point to watch it for each day he was in a foreign land.

How does one portray such anguished emotions on his face, while still maintaining his grace and eloquence? he wondered. Sesshoumaru had no problems with exhibiting grace and eloquence, but the portraying of emotions he had.

He remembered once when Kagome had commented on his lack of facial expressions, back when they first started living together.

" _Sesshoumaru, you're always so dispassionate, like a scarecrow_!"

He was as dispassionate as a scarecrow. Those things could only come from the playful observations of Kagome, something he thoroughly missed.

Sesshoumaru felt the same pang in his chest appear. Suddenly his phone rang.

It was an international call. He realized it wasn't from France, but somewhere closer to there.

" _Guten tag_ , _Herr Sesshoumaru_ ," the caller said.

In a disappointed tone he replied back in German, " _Guten tag_."

 _To be continued…_

 ** _A/N: A call from Germany? Hmmm..._**


	37. La Vie En Rose: Part II

**A/N: Hi, welcome to another depressing chapter of Binded! There will be more bad sex in this one. Other than the fact that Jyohaku should look like young Joaquin Phoenix circa 2000s, that's pretty much it. (huh?)**

 **Oh yes, some minor adjustments to the previous chapter.**

 **La Vie En Rose: Part II**

The sound of applause reverberated in the large theatre, as the curtains drew at the end of the first act. An intermission was announced in German, and the audience began to shift from their seats. Sesshoumaru stayed in his.

The man beside him uncrossed his legs, crossed them again then cleared his throat. His hands interlocked, resting on his stomach. Both men stared at the closed stage quietly, waiting for the second act of Wagner's Lohengrin to begin.

"You know about a hundred years ago, a wee lad, only twelve years old, attended his first live performance of Lohengrin," the man spoke in German. "It wasn't a very good seat either, in fact he had a standing ticket. But he was enraptured nevertheless, captivated by Wagner's opera. You could even say he fell in love for the first time. Wagner's music had opened his eyes to another world; the possibility of _creating_ another world. Do you happen to know who this young boy might be?"

Sesshoumaru replied without a blink. "Adolf Hitler."

The man turned to smile at him. "Wonderful, I see you're well-versed in our history." He extended his hand. "Finally we meet, Herr Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru shook his hand. "Likewise. Herr Gunther."

"We have so many things to talk about, don't we, Herr Sesshoumaru? I've heard countless tales about you in our circles, and I would like to dispel which are myths, and which are not. You've gained quite the reputation."

Sesshoumaru lightly snorted. "That was not my intention. Dispel me all you like, but after this performance."

"Of course, _right_ after this performance."

And then moments later the curtain drew again to the resounding orchestra playing, the whole theatre riveted in its sweeping grandiosity, and still Sesshoumaru found himself unable to feel captivated, for his mind was miles away.

* * *

The rain continued to splatter against the windows, unabashed in its fury. Kagome traced the silhouette of the Eiffel Tower in the distance, its blurry edges under her finger on the cold glass. Outside Paris was caught in a storm, its charm washed away in the relentless rain, as though someone had thrown a dark cloak over the city.

Behind her Jyohaku was sitting in bed with the television on. No one was watching it though, because everything was in French. His pills were scattered before him and he had a vodka bottle in his hand.

"What?" he had retorted earlier when she stabbed him with a look. "Vodka is an antiseptic." And because she didn't feel like arguing, she sewed her mouth shut.

It was their third day in Paris, including the night they had touched down, and they had not left Hôtel La Bourdonnais Paris even once. There was a library downstairs they visited that morning after their breakfast. It was a quaint room, beautifully decorated with exquisite furniture and artifacts. Sadly the books were all in foreign languages. She tried to relish in their rich book covers, smelling their pages, reduced to only feeling them from its surface.

Soon they were trudging back into their room. The mounting depression weighed heavier down their necks, the rain trapping them like animals. With their plans dashed and having absolutely _nothing_ to do, they both could sense it; a leaking tap in the room, and it was not water that was dripping, but clumps of their sanity.

Jyohaku switched off the television and pulled a cigarette from the drawers. He waved the bottle at her. "You look like you might need some." He patted the space beside him. "Come join me."

Kagome watched him light his stick. This man, her _husband_ , was like the sea, unpredictable, something always lurking underneath. His mood swings were volatile, constantly fluctuating. The cancer had turned him into an emotional wreck, and the side-effects of his medication were not kind either, aggravating his suicidal thoughts.

Kagome was treading on eggshells around him, where all it required was a slight spark for him to detonate. She was a sponge, soaking in his feelings. All his highs and lows, his curses colourful and his heavy sighs plaintive. He could be flashing his debonair grin as he shared some bad joke, and the next minute his eyebrows would lower and he would shut her off completely, slamming the door in her face.

She was absorbing them all, and for most of the part, they only hurt her in return.

Kagome was exhausted, depressed.

 _Did you think it was going to be easy?_ The wind returned to whisper to Kagome. Except they were in a shuttered room with no wind. _Did you think the gods would make it easy for you?_

Her nose flared. For some reason the wind sounded like Sesshoumaru's voice. Hadn't he been in her head the whole entire time?

She could imagine him clicking his tongue, chastising her in his cold monotone: " _You're only a vessel for the priest, Kagome. All the time in the world, and you have not been working."_

 _Gods,_ her heart hammered as she looked fearfully towards the windows, _did you make it rain for this?_

Gingerly, as though on auto-pilot, she found herself moving into bed to sit with him. He passed the vodka to her. She grimaced as the hot spirit burned her throat.

Jyohaku laughed. "I forgot. You're an Asahi Dry kind of girl. Have you ever smoked?" he then asked. She turned to him in surprise. Mellow, she then deduced. He was mellow from drink. She could work with that.

"No," she said.

"Care to try?"

He offered his stick to her lips. She inhaled cautiously, the smoke rushing into her throat, until her body was seized with a coughing fit. It left a nasty taste, made acrid from the vodka.

"You're really weak."

"I can take it," she countered stubbornly.

"Then keep drinking, and take another drag." Maybe he wanted to kill her, Kagome thought as the cigarette reached her lips again. Maybe he wanted to kill the both of them. And maybe she would let him.

She drank until she couldn't hold the bottle anymore. Jyohaku put the vodka away and reached forward to place it on the bedside drawer behind her. She breathed him in when he moved near her, his chest almost bumping into her face. He always smelled of aftershave. But now she could trace his light sweat, accompanied with the scent of tobacco and alcohol, and it instantly pulled her back to that night in the pub.

Kagome carefully unwrapped the waxen leaves around her memory. She watched, as if they were not hers but someone else's—her own hands reaching for Jyohaku's shirt.

They were both still dressed from their breakfast.

Jyohaku didn't look particularly surprised as he watched her undo his buttons one by one.

"We can't seem to do this completely sober, can we?" he was saying.

" _I wouldn't dare_ ," she whispered as she revealed his broad chest, evenly sparse with dark hair. She fingered the wispy trail lining down the flat plane of his abdomen, as though trying to read them, and he caught her hands in his before they could trespass any lower.

"You're so impatient," he chided. "I'm sick, in case you've forgotten."

But he was already shrugging his shirt off, still tucked in his trousers. Kagome sprinted out of bed, grabbing the lube from their suitcase, frantic before the heat of the moment could dissipate.

They struggled with their clothes, her fingers unbuckling his belt, while he removed her blouse. Kagome pulled up her skirt, not even bothering to remove it. Jyohaku dragged her panties from her ankles.

"Sit back," she urged, pushing him against the headboard. "Let me do this. I don't want you to exert yourself."

He grunted when the cool lube touched his skin, and her soft hand grasped him, working him between their bodies. Her gentle touch gave him a new rush of arousal, that sprang from his head down to his loins.

He pulled her in closer. His lips met the sensitive skin below her ear, down the slender slope of her neck. As always, her fragrance was alluring. He held her tighter.

"Tell me again, why we're doing this?" he breathed.

"Because you need an heir. Because we're running out of time."

"Right. And what did I call it again?"

"A successor-making session."

She felt his hot murmur above her breasts. "It's a horrible name."

"It is. You coined it."

His body was warm, rock-steady, but not as hot and stiff as his erection. His tumescent member slid along her quivering flesh. She guided him in and his crown pushed into her.

Their bodies moved just like that against each other, mechanical and wordless; however their insides were burning with a kind of fire, one stoked by ragged breaths and stolen moments of pleasure. In a faraway place it rained in Paris.

"Kagome," he gasped, as a wave of pain attacked him.

She held his face. "Yes, Narumi. I'm here."

He strained against the pain to meet her gaze. "Shall I tell you something?"

"Go on."

"I had a dream last night. Even though it was raining outside, we still went out to walk along the beautiful streets of Champs Elysées."

She waited until he said it: "And we were happy."

"Genuinely happy?"

"Holding-hands, top-of-the-world happy."

"Well, it's not going to rain tomorrow."

"How sure are you?" He looked at her and she smiled at him.

"Because the gods told me so."

It didn't take him long, which was good, because they both wanted it to end quickly. He came inside her with a strange muffled sound, his arms gripping her body as if he was scared he would break.

When it was over they landed on their backs, collecting their breaths, limp and spent out. It was going to be like this all the time, they realized. The difference between wanting to do it and having to do it. The sanctity of two souls joining as one, the beautiful pleasure of coitus; they had completely desecrated it; made it lackluster and tedious and painful.

Kagome was wondering if she even knew herself anymore. Her body did not belong to Sesshoumaru as much as she wanted to believe. It did not even belong to her.

"Why?" Jyohaku suddenly voiced.

She stilled beside him. She could detect it, the underlying current of animosity in his voice. Something had flipped him again.

"You know I'm not forcing you to do this," he said in a berating manner.

Kagome turned slowly towards him. "Narumi, it doesn't matter—"

"It _does_ matter. Because I've long wondered what exactly is your motive."

She sat up, watching his features turn rigid, feeling frightened of him as he continued. "Because I don't know anyone who would jump into a marriage with a sick man, travel six thousand miles away from home and strive to get conceived, all out of sheer _compassion_. You can't be that noble, Kagome. No one is."

Kagome swallowed. She could feel the acrid taste in her throat. "I never said I was."

"What is it then?" A low gutteral sound emitted from him. "I know you hate my guts. You can't stand the sight of me."

"You're wrong. I don't hate you. And I've been nothing but sincere."

"You don't hate me," he said. "But you don't _love_ me either…do you?"

Her heart pounded. "I… I can't lie and say I do."

His mouth pursed in a tight line and he turned his back towards her.

 _Narumi_ , her thoughts scattered, her chest aching. _Narumi, if I told you exactly why… If I told you I'm here to expiate my sins, what would you do?_

 _If I told you that I'm the reason for your suffering…would you forgive me?_

She reached for his back even though she was frightened. Even though her fingers were shaking and he flinched from her touch.

"You're angry again," she whispered. "But it's alright. You can vent it on me if you want. I'll take in everything for your sake. Your anger and your frustrations. Your misery and your sorrows. The only thing I can't remove is your pain and your sickness. I can only pray everyday that you get better, Narumi. And for that I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

He shook his head and cast her hand away. "You're lying," he murmured. She couldn't see his face, but she recognized the way his voice had cracked and turned husky. "You're lying. You say you hold no love for me and yet what you just said, and everything you've done for me thus far speaks love for me— _volumes_ of it. So why do you lie?"

She trembled, wishing she could cry. "Sacrifice. Is that what love is?"

Jyohaku was quiet for a moment. "If it isn't, then what is?"

* * *

Something brushed her feet as she slept, light as a feather. Kagome woke up in the dark, and saw Sesshoumaru kneeling by the bed.

He touched her foot, holding it gently in his palm, and kissed her there.

Kagome watched with unblinking eyes, her breath stalled. His caresses strayed past her ankle. He kissed his way up along the length of her calf. Gentle and tender. _Pleasurable_. His entrancing eyes never left hers.

" _Sesshoumaru_ ," she called his name. She woke up again. This time the first thing she saw was the rain outside the hotel windows, and when she turned back, Jyohaku sleeping behind her.

Kagome dragged herself up and brought her knees together, her head down. She stayed like that for a long while. Unable to fall back to sleep she took the remote control and switched on the television, putting it on mute. The news played to her, a flash of hectic images whizzing on the screen.

It took her awhile to realize they were covering news on the current state in South Africa. She saw destruction, bloodshed. Her heart lurched in her chest. Before they parted ways, Sesshoumaru had mentioned he was leaving for a trip to the place.

 _My god_ , she thought, covering her gasp. _The whole country is in shambles._

She took her phone on the drawer in panic, her shaking finger dialling his number. She waited, each ring rising her anxiety.

He finally answered.

"Hello Kagome," Sesshoumaru's cool voice appeared in her ears. Kagome closed her eyes, flooded with relief. She hadn't heard his voice in two weeks but it felt like two years.

"Sesshoumaru," she replied, her voice wracked with emotion. " _Are you safe?_ "

"Are you worried about me? After that damning text you sent me. I'm touched."

"I'm watching the news right now. There's riots everywhere and terrorists."

"Yes," he said patiently. "The whole country is in a lock-down. My work there is finished. In fact, I've already left a few days ago. I'm actually in Berlin, Germany, as we speak."

"Germany?" she repeated in slight confusion. It sounded like he was travelling around the world. He was busy, with or without her.

"Anyway, how are you, Kagome? Are you enjoying your time in Paris?"

" _I miss you_ ," her words came in a fervent whisper.

There was a long pause over the line. And then softly, "I miss you too, Kagome." And then the words that they let fall between them, because it was too painful to say it: _I miss you, in every waking moment. I think about you, in every single thing that I do._

"Just for awhile," he said. "I told you I would lend you just for awhile. After that we'll return to each to other. We're meant to be together, aren't we?"

"We're soulmates."

"That's right. That's right, Kagome, we're soulmates." Sesshoumaru took a deep breath over the line. Kagome waited for his next words. "Listen," he told her. "Berlin is only a few hours from Paris if I catch a flight. We could meet tomorrow, have a short rendezvous. Would you like that?"

Her heart soared only to plummet back. "Yes… Yes, but…" She gripped her phone, eyeing the sleeping figure beside her. "I can't just _leave_ him."

"It's just for a few hours. You'll think of something. After all in the name of love, one would even swim across a sea of burning flames if one needs to." He called her name when she became silent. "Kagome?"

"Yes, Sesshoumaru, I'm listening."

"Meet me at the Pont des Arts at six tomorrow. Right in the middle of the bridge. I'll wait for you, Kagome."

And the next morning, true to her words, Paris had really stopped raining.

 _To be continued…_

 _A/N: These two chapters were isnpired after listening to Lauv's Paris in the Rain on repeat. Anyway, PSA: Jyohaku and Kagome's relationship, in fact even with Sesshoumaru is really toxic. None of this is to be seen as romantic in real life. Love yourself before anyone else._


	38. La Vie En Rose: Part III

**La Vie En Rose (Part III)**

 _Hold me close and hold me fast  
_ _The magic spell you cast  
_ _This is la vie en rose_  
- **La Vie En Rose** , Louis Armstrong

They requested for the check after their breakfast plates were cleared.

Kagome sipped her cappuccino in Café Le Carré Élysée, surrounded with animated chatter from the other tables.

She watched the busy barista at work as they made their gourmet coffee, the smell of freshly roasted beans rising in the air, mingling with the quiet French song playing overhead. When her eyes landed at Jyohaku across the table, she realized he was watching her.

It was a peculiar thing to know you're being watched by someone. It didn't help that his eyes wore a dark, brooding gaze. She looked over her shoulder.

"Don't turn. I'm looking at you."

"Why, do I look odd?" Did she have a parsley leaf from her sandwich up her teeth?

His posture eased as a smile grew. "No. Just that you look different today."

"Oh. Must be the sunlight."

"Has to be. You appear more—how do I say— _radiant_."

Her cheeks went aflame. Jyohaku was in an unusually good mood since morning. Charming, if she even dared. A complete switch from his depressing moods. The man changed like the weather itself. He moved with surprising vigour too. Just like the way the rain had suddenly stopped, flooding the city with warm sunshine, it was purely and simply, by the grace of the gods.

"Hoo boy. You know I don't take compliments very well," Kagome replied good-naturedly, waving her face. "Especially from you."

Jyohaku laughed. "I can _see_ from your reaction. Shall we get you a glass of water?"

It felt like that night in the bar, except they were married now.

Kagome had planned the day's itinerary the morning itself, and they will need to abide by its schedule by hook or crook.

"We must leave the hotel latest by nine and take a taxi to Champs-Élysées. We'll have breakfast there, do a little shopping and make our way slowly to the Arc de Triomphe. Are you listening?" she told him when they were still in the hotel.

Jyohaku grunted.

"Since the Eiffel Tower is the closest here, we'll make it the last stop. I already bought special tickets online and we're granted a slot at four p.m. to go up the tower. Narumi, you're not saying anything."

He frowned. "How am I supposed to speak when you have a knife near my jugular vein? My life is in your hands right now."

Jyohaku was sitting in the bath again, Kagome assisting with his grooming routine.

"Worry more about your carotid artery instead," she replied, scraping the stubble below his chin carefully. "One good slash and you'll be out in three minutes."

"How do you know these things?"

"High school."

"High school, again."

The waiter came with the check. Jyohaku received it, and Kagome looked at the time.

Ten a.m.

They'll leave the Eiffel Tower by five and head back to the hotel. Jyohaku will need to take his medication and it would make him drowsy. He'll rest. And then she'll leave, because she had a rendezvous to catch at Pont des Arts at six.

It was the perfect plan.

Kagome will do _anything_ to see Sesshoumaru again.

* * *

Kouhei unlocked Jyohaku's door with the house keys entrusted to him. They heard a chorus of mews from inside, and little furry heads, all bright-eyed and eager, began to poke themselves out from the open door.

He immediately bent down to pat them. "They're so darn cute, Amari! Look at them!" He opened the door wider. "Omigosh, it's like a cat sanctuary! A cat _paradise_!"

Behind him Amari was wailing in her spot, as two cats scampered out to play at her feet.

"I didn't know you're scared of cats. You should have told me earlier," Kouhei scolded her after they were done with their feeding duties. They had cleared their litter boxes and changed their water too.

It was only their first day taking care of the cats. They were instructed by the priest to come here daily for the whole week, and Amari was already close to fainting. Each time a cat brushed past her legs or even mewed at her, she would immediately stiffen up like a rock.

"I'm not scared of them, I'm just scared of what they might _do_ to me..."

"Ehhh, that pretty much sounds like the definition of "scared"."

Amari and Kouhei sat on the floor as they watched the cats. They gathered obediently, munching from their bowls, their tails wagging in contentment.

Amari craned her neck to study Jyohaku's house. It was a large traditional home, boasting many rooms, and a large garden. It was meant for a family unit. However his parents were long gone, and it proved too spacious for a lone man to live in. But now he had his cats...and a new wife to accompany him.

With the priest so far away, this was the closest Amari could possibly get. The closest she would _ever_ get, she realized. Her feet caressed against the tatami flooring, her soles grasping the tingling sensation. Did his feet touch this spot too?

The cats had really conquered the house as their own. Once they were done with breakfast they roamed around and hopped onto the shelves and climbed along the beams. Shippo stayed behind and cleaned himself beside Amari. She watched him with transfixed eyes, extremely tempted to touch him.

"Speaking of which, have you made plans to move in with your brother?" Kouhei asked. He sounded like he had been waiting to say it out.

"Nope. He outright rejected me over the phone. He said all I needed was a vacation. I don't know, maybe I should go to the islands. I haven't been there since I was a kid."

Amari looked at him. "Do you want to come? It'll be fun. We can go snorkeling, see the beautiful corals. Ah, did I tell you my nickname was Coral Girl as a kid? That's how much I really love them!"

Kouhei smiled uncertainly at her. Asking him to go to the islands. Was it just with him alone or was she bringing other friends? What did everything even mean? Ugh, women were always giving him ambiguous signals.

Then her hand was suddenly over his, squeezing.

"I… I want to know you better, Kouhei," she said shyly, her face growing beet-red.

Kouhei was so embarrassed that his hand jerked away. "What, am I going to be your rebound boyfriend?"

"Oh no, I didn't mean to offend you like that!" Amari cried, covering her face.

Kouhei laughed. "I'm just joking! Gosh, you should look at the mirror when you get flustered."

"Don't lie, you were flustered too!" She took his hand again, and it was big and it fitted nicely with hers.

She remembered when Jyohaku had talked about hiring a new staff. _A young handsome chap_ , he had described Kouhei. _I think you might like him, Kirihata._

"What's this?" she pointed out to his hand. There was a pale, discoloured mark on his palm.

"Oh, it's just a birthmark," Kouhei said simply.

Her thoughts were broken by a wet, rough sensation on her toes. She gasped when she realized Shippo was licking her.

" _Kyaaaa_!"

Kouhei smiled. "Shippo likes everyone, doesn't he?" He laid on the floor, sighing, his hand still linked with hers. "Man, I wish I can go to Paris too."

"Uh-huh," Amari went, lying beside him, gazing at the ceiling, "I wonder what they're doing right now."

Kouhei eyed her. "They're on their honeymoon. What do you think they're doing?"

"Eww don't be a pervert, Kouhei."

"I'm sorry," he said, and he was laughing, rolling to his side, "I just can't imagine them together."

Amari glared at him at first, until a giggle too burst from her chest. "I know right. They're going to spend their whole lives fighting with each other."

A pensive look then caught on his face. "But I really feel sorry for Sesshoumaru-san though. He and Kagome-sama really made a good couple, didn't they?"

Amari patted her chest from giggling too much. "They really were. And I really wish him happiness, wherever he is."

* * *

In the tourist guidebook, Champs-Élysées was dubbed as the most famous avenue in the world. The moment they opened the door out of the cafe, it greeted their eyes— a road stretched far and wide, flanked on its either side by impressive monuments and swanky boutiques and peculiar attractions. They could see the Arc of Triomphe at the far end, winking at the distance.

Jyohaku leaned on his majestic cane. He'd told Kagome he wouldn't be caught dead in a wheelchair. With his long coat, all he was missing was a top hat and a monocle.

"You know what I always tell you..." she started.

He rolled his eyes. " _...Don't exert yourself._ "

They walked leisurely down the street, basking in the golden glow of the morning sun, soaking in the magical charm of Paris. He felt healthy, every breath a new surge of life in his lungs. And happy too, top-of-the-world happy, in fact. Just like in his dream.

Jyohaku was blissfully unaware of how Kagome was distracting his line of sight from the ugly realities of the city—giant rats, vomit on the sidewalk, sneaky pickpockets.

 _Let him have his picture-perfect postcard of Paris_ , she thought.

Without a word his hand had slipped quietly around hers. She let him only because it would be cruel not to. All the way, until they reached the end of the avenue before the Arc of Triomphe.

They took lots of photos. Kagome was dressed in black from head to toe, from her hat and scarf, down to her ankle boots. The historical landmark loomed tall and grand behind her. Jyohaku thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world.

* * *

Ichiro slurped on his ramen noodles. He was sitting cross-legged on the floor, facing the blue sky from the balcony of his new house. There were still boxes lying around for months waiting to be unpacked. He had been too busy to touch them.

Earlier that day Amari had thrown him aback with a call. Move in with him? His sister was nuts. There were no jobs for her here.

This town was _dead_ , and far from the city. The only silver lining was that housing was a lot cheaper. He could finally afford an apartment with rooms.

Seriously though, Ichiro thought, eating his noodles glumly. How did Kagome get married with the priest? He almost spat his food when Amari told him, and he didn't need to rack his brains to know it was the very reason she wanted to pack her bags. Still.

It wasn't a question of why but how.

 _I can't believe it...that the psychopath would allow Kagome to marry another man less than a year after he bloody tried to kill me._

His mood became gloomier as he thought about it. His food tasted soggy in his mouth.

 _Kagome, I don't understand everything that's going on, but please, just be safe._

He threw a dreary sigh and got up to the kitchen with his noodles. His foot accidentally kicked a large box on the way there. He eyed the offending object contemplatively.

 _Why did I even bring_ you _here?_ he thought. _Wasn't it because of you that Kagome got mad at me, and…_

Ichiro knelt down to the box. He ripped it open just to see its contents for the last time. A collection of white plastic limbs, clothes and a long wig. Kikyou's mannequin face, detached from its body, stared right back at him.

"You stayed with me for far too long, haven't you?" he spoke tensely. As if its dead eyes were capable of processing words, of understanding his feelings. "And what happened has miraculously cured me of my fixation. No more shrine maidens, I say."

Ichiro hoisted the box under his arm and went out of the door. He walked downstairs and out of his apartment complex, to the field behind. There was a large metal bin used by the residents to burn garbage. Probably in other places this was illegal. But here, you could do anything.

He chucked the box inside and lit his lighter.

The fire started to grow. Ichiro pulled on his shirt to fan himself from the heat then squatted on the grass, waiting, as the black smoke billowed into the open air, the box disintegrating, the mannequin melting in its fiery wake. It left an awful, pungent smell.

"Hey Kirihata!" Someone shouted from one of the kitchen windows. "Are you burning plastic? You know you're not supposed to!"

"Oops!" Ichiro yelled back. "My bad!"

"Damn you!"

He continued to sit there, watching the cinders rise and dance into the blue sky. After awhile he had to wipe his face with his shirt, for his bitter tears had begun to form and slip into his lips.

* * *

There was a protest on the main roads leading to the Eiffel Tower. Kagome wasn't sure what the riotous crowd was advocating for, but it was an eye-opening scene, something she would never witness in peaceful Tokyo. The police had blocked the area off. Taking any form of road transport was out of the question.

She looked at Jyohaku uneasily. "I think we may need to take the Metro. Do you think you can manage?"

His breaths had gone shorter from the growing strains of fatigue, his cane wobbling under his weight. "We don't have a choice, do we?" he huffed.

Kagome looked at her watch, mildly annoyed. They had taken a long break at the kebab store just now, too long apparently. It was three-thirty, and their viewing ticket was for four PM.

Who would anticipate this would happen?

She didn't speak on the way to the station, her thoughts roiling, on edge. It was packed due to the roadblock. As they waited for the train at the crowded, dingy platform, her anxiety started to creep at the back of her neck.

 _Tut, tut tut, is someone growing impatient?_ The little voice teased in her head.

Beside her Jyohaku sat on a bench, reading a French phrasebook. " _Je voudrais parler français,_ " he enunciated carefully in all the wrong places.

What if they were late and missed their turn? Kagome agonised. _What if we have to take the snaking queue? Jyohaku can't stand for long periods_.

The train came. The crowd jostled to get in. Kagome and Jyohaku will need to take a few stops to Trocadéro, then walk across the Pont de l'Alma Bridge to their destination. Walk, walk, walk. As if they hadn't walked enough. Kagome clutched a handrail as the train moved, taking a deep breath to compose herself.

 _No, if we miss our turn, we're not going to queue. God knows how long it takes. We'll just see the Eiffel Tower without going upstairs then. We can't stay later than five. We need to stick to the time. He needs to take his medication. We can't reach the hotel late._

I _can't be late._

Kagome looked up. There were two more stops to Trocadéro. Suddenly, it felt like someone had splashed a bucket of cold water on her.

Jyohaku. He was not beside her. Or behind, or in front, or in the whole carriage for that matter.

He was still sitting at the busy platform, reading his book. She had left him behind.

 _To be continued…_

 _A/N: I'm sorry if my descriptions of Paris are inaccurate. I've never been there, but I took a walk through Google Maps and downloaded the Metro map in the name of research. Why didn't you choose Amsterdam? my fiance said, because he went there. No, I said, because someone wanted to go to bloody Paris, the most cliche honeymoon place ever._


End file.
